by Faye Shakath on September 23rd, 2012, 7:24 am
I'm borrowing a friends laptop for a few days, I am finally able to get on her for a few moments. I came on here trying to find a place to tell everyone that my computer was broken and that I was having problems with it. That's when I found the blogs and starting reading them. As I read these, I find some of these are powerful and resounding. I then got the brilliant idea that I wanted to start doing something just as impacting and constant. But what? Journals are stupid and I know (this why I also don't have a twitter account) that no one really cares what happens in my day to day life. I don't really do anything consistently enough other than working and school. Not to mention I don't have a cool hobby to blog about it like cooking or making birdhouses.
Then I had an idea about a topic others might enjoy. Often enough people find that the world sucks. I can add to that too; the world is not all daises for me either. But at the same time, I think that sometimes we forget the nicer things in life. I have decided that this blog will be about general advice to stay happy and a nice little excerpt of depressing writing (because this is a writing forum, isn't it?) to even it out. Because who really enjoys happy writing? It might all tie together into a story, it might not. Let see, shall we?
I think it was the rain that reminded me of home.
No matter how warm it got in the summer, the rain was always icy and seemed to chill you all the way to the bone. It managed to seep into your skin and wouldn’t come out even after a few minutes in a hot shower. Then again, what has hot showers ever washed away other than body odor? It certainly doesn't wash away shame. It doesn’t wash away the past. And it certain doesn’t wash away his blue eyes. I keep remembering them.
Even as I trudge, hearing my jeans scrap pitifully against the cement, I relive those bright cobalt eyes holding my gaze. They didn’t waver and they didn’t judge. He just. . . cried. He had lost everything and when he had gotten on his knees to beg for release . . . .
Leaving was the best option. I couldn’t give him what he asked. How could I? I had seen those blue eyes grow from a child’s to a haunted man’s. His world was of grandeur and politics. His world was of intelligence and scheming. His world was of venom and double meanings. His world. . . .
I started to look up at the tower that stood off in the distance. Even from so far away you could see the clock tower that was Great Britain’s pride and joy. It stood strong against the freezing rain and did not bow its head to the wind that threatened it. Earlier today I had looked at the same tower with the little white sheep that we called clouds bouncing around it. They had been munching on the blue grass that was the sky and playing with the bright sun. Even the breeze was warm and loving. Why did those sheep pull off their disguises? Why hadn’t I seen before that those sheep were really black wolves that prowled the sky? Now their growling rumbled throughout the world and cast the city beneath it into fright.
I was frightened. Neither of the sky nor the park I happened to wander through. No. There wasn’t much here to be frightened off. Yes the squeaking of the swings was eerie. Yes my shoe squelching in the grass was disheartening. Yes the night came upon me swiftly. Still it was not this that made my stomach churn. His world was just not a place for me. I could never stand beside him nor should I.
No. I should just keep walking. |
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Now time for something to help people be little happier:
There are times when you just can't do anything about a situation at the moment. Either you are waiting for a callback on your interview, having a fight with someone who is away, or even you phone is broken and you don't have the money to fix it. You know what you do when you can't do anything? You forget about it. A lot of the time I find myself stressing over something I know I can't do anything about. At that point I have to tell myself: "Hey, you can't do anything right now. Nothing is going to happen from me worrying or thinking about it. Right now, do some else more productive until I can actually make a difference."
Sometimes, that release, is all people need to let things go. So next time you find yourself stressing, ask yourself if you can actually do anything about it and whether or not forgetting about it for a time might be good for you. |
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Last edited by Faye Shakath on October 7th, 2012, 10:33 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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