[Iliana's Scrapbook] Welcome to my Insanity

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The player scrapbooks forum is literally a place for writers to warm-up, brainstorm, keep little scraps of notes, or just post things to encourage themselves and each other. Each player can feel free to create their own thread - one per account - and use them accordingly.

[Iliana's Scrapbook] Welcome to my Insanity

Postby Iliana on January 2nd, 2012, 7:38 am

Iliana's Scrap Book

Always a Work in Progress


I have felt for a while that I needed just a little extra outlet for some of my more random thoughts and contemplations, and then someone so kindly pointed out this little forum for me. I shall be putting this place to full use in a very short time, and some of my ramblings may come at random times on random subjects. I do not mind comments on any of them at all, and as for the looks of my scrap book right now, well I will be working on it haha.

I may add some color to this page one day, but of that I cannot really say at this particular moment. I suppose for now we shall allow fate to take its course, and now I shall allow my mind to move my hand as it sees fit. Expect my thoughts to flow freely onto the page from this point onward, and hopefully something artistic will come to me in time. Please know that sometime my works are of a rather forlorn nature, but that is simply my form of inspiration. Enjoy the inner-workings of my own mind :)

Fair warning, you do not have to read my scrapbook. If you do not like some of the things I write then please just don't read them.

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Last edited by Iliana on January 23rd, 2012, 5:17 am, edited 3 times in total.
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Iliana
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Posts: 115
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[Iliana's Scrapbook] Welcome to my Insanity

Postby Iliana on January 2nd, 2012, 7:49 am

A cold wind swept through the quiet town, a chill that set the bones of ages rattling in the night. A lone call, forlorn and sorrowful heard trailing down the hills to the houses bellow awakens a single child in her bed. Sleep still heavy on her brow she slowly steps down from her bed of clouds and soft warmth, her bare feet touching the cold boards of reality for the first time it seems. To the window the child goes, her hand drawing back the blinds to peer out into the endless darkness beyond, and too her eyes is brought the eminence form of what is to come. In that moment the child learns that she should not have stepped down from her warmth and comfort. In that moment she sees her folly for leaving behind all that she had to step into this world of unknown and danger.

The window burst open, and the child calls out a cry of fear and regret, for now her life has been claimed by the thing known only to those who leave their childhood behind. No longer can she return to that place of warmth and contentment, for now the chill has crept into her own bones, aging them as well turing those childish thoughts to those of dreary contemplation that plagues all who have met the same fate. Now the child is swept away from what she thought was her world and taken to a new place that is separate and the same all at once, and now the passage of time has begun to move forward at a faster pace. Now, the child has realized that she truly exists.
Last edited by Iliana on January 2nd, 2012, 8:10 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Iliana
Light Footed and Light Hearted
 
Posts: 115
Words: 69751
Joined roleplay: October 19th, 2011, 5:47 am
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[Iliana's Scrapbook] Welcome to my Insanity

Postby Iliana on January 2nd, 2012, 8:09 pm

With Regret


"I cannot find my way..." The voice called out in the night.
"I cannot see the path..." The voice was filled with fright.
"I cannot feel my beating heart..," The voice did say, with a quiver.
"I cannot tell you my own name...," The voice did speak, with a shiver.

Caught up in the darkness the voice calls out to those who have lost their way. Sadness and longing drip from the words like blood from an open wound, and all who hear it feel their own minds becoming as blank as the darkness they have found themselves. Beware all who would set themselves in idleness, for fear the coming darkness that envelopes those who have no way.

"I have forgotten..." The voice cries out with anguished words.
"I have forgotten all I was..." The voice speaks of times long past.
"I have become what I always wanted..." The voice does say without delight.
"I have escaped the the world I thought I hated..." The voice is filled with much regret.
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Iliana
Light Footed and Light Hearted
 
Posts: 115
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Joined roleplay: October 19th, 2011, 5:47 am
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[Iliana's Scrapbook] Welcome to my Insanity

Postby Iliana on January 2nd, 2012, 8:23 pm

This is an old poem I found while I was clearing out my closet. I can almost remember where the inspiration for it came from, but I do not wish to think on it for too long...

Nightmare


Oh subtle dream that appears in the night,
So like the reaper come hence for my soul.
You creep in an fill my heart with such fright,
With sounds of death and my clocks final toll.

Red eyes of beast yet found but in darkness,
Do follow hence my steps in wayward dreams.
They seek to maim, slaughter and kill me, 'less,
Some way I find to cease their countless schemes,

Eternal pleasure I find in the day,
The breaking dawn doth drive away my fears,
With rays of light the darkness it doth slay,
and aid mine eyes to view the morning clear.

Yet peace I find not, I quake at my core,
When I ponder the dark, coming once more.
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Iliana
Light Footed and Light Hearted
 
Posts: 115
Words: 69751
Joined roleplay: October 19th, 2011, 5:47 am
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[Iliana's Scrapbook] Welcome to my Insanity

Postby Iliana on January 11th, 2012, 6:25 pm

Do not ask me why... I cannot say for certain whether this is truth or simply a dream... and I shall not answer to a dream...

Tell me, do you know? There was a time when I did, so long ago now it seems... But I did know. Back when things were simpler and easier to understand, when every day was a new and wondrous gift. Can you remember that time as well? No... Perhaps not...

Tell me, did you feel that? It was like... Something distant was calling. An echo of a long forgotten sound... A voice perhaps? But no, such silliness this is. What would it matter anyway, it is all gone from me is it not?

Perhaps my sanity has finally left me... for I begin to drift into those waking dreams once again... My life of now seems a distant memory, where as the life I was or wished to be seems more real that ever. I can almost... No... It cannot be so, and surely this is a dream, for only a dream could be this glorious...

I had long forgotten these feelings that burn within me, but now they have awakened anew. But why? Why now does my mind move to these incorporeal longings when I must focus on the real? But then... What is real for me now... I have almost forgotten that which anchored me, or was it I was never anchored at all...
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Iliana
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Posts: 115
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Joined roleplay: October 19th, 2011, 5:47 am
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[Iliana's Scrapbook] Welcome to my Insanity

Postby Iliana on January 22nd, 2012, 7:25 am

Carry it out into the night, begone from my sight. I no longer care for your words. They have now fallen upon deaf ears...

What is it that causes these feelings... do you know? This... ache... this bleeding heart that fills my soul to the brim with uncertainty. I carry it now, that burden that you have set upon my shoulders. The weight of the world some say, but to me it feels far heavier... Do you know? Did you plan it that way? Tell me... why is it that this happened, and if it was not by design, is it simply fate?

I cast it out! Begone from me oh bearer of evil tidings! This weight, i shall carry it no longer. Begone from me oh sins of old, I claim you no more!

What is it that keeps me bound to you... is it fate? Tell me... why have I not moved on past this time of uncertainty and into the future? I cannot say... but can you?
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Iliana
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Posts: 115
Words: 69751
Joined roleplay: October 19th, 2011, 5:47 am
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[Iliana's Scrapbook] Welcome to my Insanity

Postby Iliana on January 23rd, 2012, 5:08 am

What is it that causes this... that turns the minds of good to actions of evil. I cannot say... but I can express experience to the fact.

Crows night and bloodied sun follow a man who has committed these crimes, a plague born of ill contend follows close in his wake. On his feet he wears the skin of those who he has stepped on along his journey. From his back trails a cloak of darkness crafted from his feelings of malice and envy of the world. In his hands he holds the dreams ripped from those who tried to hope. His eyes are a reflection of his inner darkness, and from them flow the blood of an aching heart.

I cannot say what it is that causes a soul to fall to such a place, to lose the virtue of new life's first breath. Perhaps it is the walk of life that brings forth such changes, or maybe it is not the world but those within it that shape him. Can it be that he was always such, and that now, in this state, he has found what he was always meant to be? I cannot believe that...
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Iliana
Light Footed and Light Hearted
 
Posts: 115
Words: 69751
Joined roleplay: October 19th, 2011, 5:47 am
Race: Human
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