(Flash back) Demlin's walk

(This is a thread from Mizahar's fantasy role playing forum. Why don't you register today? This message is not shown when you are logged in. Come roleplay with us, it's fun!)

This shining population center is considered the jewel of The Sylira Region. Home of the vast majority of Mizahar's population, Syliras is nestled in a quiet, sprawling valley on the shores of the Suvan Sea. [Lore]

(Flash back) Demlin's walk

Postby Demlin on January 26th, 2012, 4:29 am

Demlin needed to clear his mind, He had trained hard in the last few weeks consistantly pushing himself in his combat. He sparred for 3 hours a day, and then listened to lectures of the older knights who now served as teachers for the squires.

He now sat in his room, leaning on the desk next to his bed reading a book on stances for using a long sword. He had recently been scolded for not knowing his stances well enough, so before leaving the lecture room he had borrowed a book on sword fighting.

Demlin flipped through the pages, slowly so he could read the titles of sections until he stumbled upon sword fighting stances. He sighed, he did not enjoy to read, he preferred learning through experience but he knew he must have knowledge before he could attempt the task. The book mentions the basic stance for fighting with a long sword, they mentioned having a straight back and the sword as close to the middle of your opponent, both vertical and horizontal so you could counter any directional attack they chose. The hilt was to be perpendicular with your sword arms parallel leg.

Not having the patience to sit much longer he grabbed his sword, attempting to mimic the stance on the page, at first it was hard to balance the sword just right but he continued to practice getting into the stance until it was second nature. Deciding this was enough he sheathed his sword, and began packing the necessity's for a day's travel. He also packed the book.

Demlin had made his way to the north gates, when he arrived there were two guards leaning against the wall ready to ask him a question.

The one on the left, was a tall skinny fellow that made his chain mail look quite baggy. The man to his right on the other hand looked pretty scary, his armor looked as a layer of skin to his large arm muscles, and he carried a large bastard sword on his back.

“Hey there, leaving town sir?” The smaller guard asked, he was just checking to see if I wanted to leave or had a question for him

“Yes I am going to be taking a trip, I am in need of some fresh air and quiet to think.” Demlin responded, as he stood there he made a friendly gesture to the other guard as he waited for the gate to open.

The large gate slowly opened, the gate was a large door between the wall that surrounded the castle, which was made of a nice whitish stone that was very beautiful. He always wondered how men created great art such as that of the castle.

“Thank you men, have a nice day” Demlin said as he passed through the gates and followed the dirt road out into the wilderness seperating the city from his destination. Walking at a slow pace, there was no hurry since he was out to think about the past weeks. He decided to recap on some of the lessons he had taken from his officers recently.

Following the road, he did not really need to focus too much on where he was going as much as think, Demlin thought of his officers mentioning that leadership is an important aspect to being a knight of sylivas and to lead you need good sense yourself. They gave each of us in the class a situation, we were a knight leading a group of squires into the wilderness outlaying the farmlands to the south of the city. There was wheat being stolen from these places.
Last edited by Demlin on January 26th, 2012, 4:50 am, edited 2 times in total.
User avatar
Demlin
Squire
 
Posts: 25
Words: 20807
Joined roleplay: January 25th, 2012, 3:23 am
Location: U.S.
Race: Human
Character sheet

(Flash back) Demlin's walk

Postby Demlin on January 26th, 2012, 4:29 am

In this situation I received my squad would have been surrounded by twice in our number of men. I ordered them to form a circle face outwards to our enemies, and to crouch beneath their shields, this would force them to come to us in close combat being that arrows would do little good against a wall of shields.

The Bandits came forward with axes attacking his squad, I ordered spears at the ready to push them back so they could not push into the circle and get better concave on the squires.

After pushing back and killing most of the first wave of men, they were now at equal numbers so Demlin dropped his spear and unsheathed a long sword stepping forward to the man in front of him, thrusting forward towards his mid torso. The teacher said he was quicker then Demlin, side stepped and attempted to slash at his shoulder, he did hit but the plate armor had stopped him from drawing blood instead crushing Demlin's shoulder bone.

With his sword arm hindered, Demlin said he would raise his shield and charge as fast as he could into the bandit. Succeeding the bandit had been thrown to the ground, giving one of the squires enough time to effectivly finish off the bandit.

“Thanks a lot, saved me there!” Demlin said to the squire smiling as they turned to eachother the last of the bandit's have been taken care of.

The teacher finished reading Demlin's paper on the scenario.

“Well, I liked your choise to do the circle with spears, but why disband that? You could have still held off the rest of their men with that choise. Do not fix what's not broken!” The officer said.

“Ah, yes your right I won't do something like that again!”

Demlin coming back to present time noticed it was getting dark. Thinking to himself it is time to start on his way back, while on the topic of tactic's amused himself with scenarios of beasts attacking him on his way back and how he would handle it.

OOCWell this is my first story, or atleast the first one I wrote that I felt confident enough to share for critisism! please PM me letting me know any tips or thoughts on it thanks
User avatar
Demlin
Squire
 
Posts: 25
Words: 20807
Joined roleplay: January 25th, 2012, 3:23 am
Location: U.S.
Race: Human
Character sheet

(Flash back) Demlin's walk

Postby Chevalier on February 14th, 2012, 1:10 am

Image
Demlin


LORE
  • Longsword Stances
  • Don’t Fix What Isn’t Broken



EXPERIENCE
Skill XP Earned
Longsword 1
Leadership 1
Writing 1
Tactics 1


Storyteller Notes


Secret :
When I look at how you’re your writing has changed and in such a short time, I’m really impressed. I compare this thread to the thread you have with Xalet, and I see significant improvement in that thread compared to this one. There were some spelling mistakes here, but more often than not the problem was becoming far too ambiguous during the writing. Some parts were difficult to visualize as the reader, and I found myself trying to guess at exactly what was happening. Was the scenerio all written? Was there some physical aspect to it? I think a big part of the problem was mixing first person and third person narrative.
Image
User avatar
Chevalier
Knighted by Dusk
 
Posts: 322
Words: 117750
Joined roleplay: December 12th, 2011, 6:50 am
Location: DS of Syliras
Race: Staff account
Office


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 0 guests