[Sullins Residence] Quenching the Thirst [Clyde Sullins]

[Xii]

11th of Spring, 515 AV 6th bell When Xii woke up it was all at once, and in a place she didn't know. She sat up, instantly tense, looking around at the bedroom she appeared to be in. It took her a few ticks to remember: Clyde Sullins. She was still at his house. She'd stayed last night. It had gotten too dark to go home. The young girl stood up from her place on the floor, grabbing up her backpack, and looked around the room with interest while her heartbeat sped down once again to normal. She investigated ~and made use of~ the privy, which seemed to connect to another room ~Clyde Sullins' room, she suddenly remembered. She roamed back into the room she'd used, stretching slightly. From her backpack she pulled a little tin of fruit and dried meats that she'd once picked up for traveling but hadn't ended up needing on the trip from Syliras to here. Xii opened it up and took out a piece of jerky, chewing on it with delicate, slightly-pointed teeth. The Zithling wandered back through the house as far as she could go, on the alert for any other occupants, whether that be the dog Rye, Clyde Sullins himself, or someone she hadn't yet seen. But she didn't come across anyone, and she realized, with a feeling of consternation, that she was still trapped. The areas that she seemed able to access were the bathroom and Sullins' room, the room she'd stayed in, and the lab, which was still locked from last night. Eventually, she stepped back to Sullins' room, and hovered outside of the closed door, wondering at what she might do. If he was still meditating from the night before, it would be better to just open the door as quietly as possible so as not to disrupt his focus. But if he had stopped his meditations, and fallen asleep, then... wouldn't it be better to knock? She didn't really know how the mage might respond to someone attempting to enter into the room without warning. He had said that stuff about fire yesterday, and though it might be interesting to see him in action, she didn't really feel like getting burnt this morning. Finally, the Zithling just shrugged and rapped lightly on the door with her knuckles, figuring it was better to screw with his concentration than risk her face getting melted like candle wax. After a few ticks she would knock again, and then ~whether or not she heard a voice telling her to come in~ she would crack the door open, ready to inspect what was inside. She supposed it was possible that he might not even be where she'd last left him. Possibly he was up and moving already, looking for breakfast or doing whatever it was that important members of the Ebonstryfe did in the early mornings. However, it was obvious once she'd opened the door that he was indeed where she'd seen him last, and it looked like he hadn't hardly moved from where he'd been. Xii slipped into the room and leaned against the chest of drawers, waiting either for him to say something in the case that he had ceased his meditations, or otherwise just watching and trying to judge his progress. If he did notice that she'd entered, she would ask, "How goes it?" still nibbling on her fruit and meats. She would listen to his progress and any questions or clarifications he needed, before giving any more instruction. oocHopefully I didn't mess the floor plan up too badly. If I read the layout right, one of the two bedrooms opens to the common room at the front of the house, so I just assumed it was Clyde's. ... EDIT: Totally messed it up but I think I understand now, and I think the post itself is alright.

[Clyde Sullins]

It had been a long night for Clyde to say the least. He'd perhaps dozed a bell or two here and there, but he'd done his best to stay up through the night, focusing on his task of meditation and understanding morphing. He kept repeating the objects over in his head, picturing them, then closing his eyes and trying to see them all down to the last detail. Bed, sheets, mattress, door, other door, drawers, mirror, bench, table, candle. Again. Repeat. Over. And over. He kept going through the night, only stopping once to get up and relieve his bladder, but otherwise keeping to his task and sitting on the bed. It was as such that Xii found Clyde in the morning, tired but still concentrating on his task, and doing his best to clear his mind of outside thoughts and distractions. Though he was rather skilled in meditation, with hunger clawing in, and tiredness slipping over him like a oppressive weight, he was starting to lose concentration, and starting to forget why he was trying to picture the things in the room. It was in one of his many cycles of opening his eyes to scan the room, before trying to picture it again, when he noticed a new object in the room. Not an object though, but a person, Xii. In his tired state such thought process took almost half a chime, before he understood the girl was in his room, and had asked him a question. “It goes as it goes. I've spent all night picturing the room, scanning it and trying to perfectly recall all the objects in it. I think I've finally gotten to the point where I can see all of the objects in my head with my eyes closed.” Clyde smiled for a moment, as he continued on. “I suppose it must be working, since when I first saw you, my first thought was that there was a new object in the room. I didn't even associate you with as being a person for a bit.”

[Xii]

It was odd, his reaction to her, and somewhat amusing. Sullins looked out of it, and after she'd entered the room, there had been a long delayed reaction to her entrance. Finally, though, he seemed to notice her. It was interesting, she thought, that such a powerful mage and member of the Ebonstryfe would seek out a teacher ~even one such as Xii~ and trust that in his studies he might remain safe. She could have ordered him to some task that could have hurt him. Or, noting his impaired state, she could have slit his throat and he likely would have bled out before he'd even known what was happening. ...Though, considering further, he still had that stick ~Cha, as he'd called it~ so perhaps he hadn't been as defenseless as he'd appeared. Something to think about. She wondered if he ever actually let it go. After Sullins' last statement Xii nodded, saying, "Good. It seems things are going well." He looked tired, though, and she was certain other things must be ailing him... his bladder, his stomach, his back or neck from sitting in the same position for so long. She shook her head, sliding down the chest of drawers so that she was sitting on the floor. "You must be hungry or thirsty, or have other needs. If you want, you may have some small amount of water and take a short break, but no sleep. It would also be better to do without food. The point of the exercise, after all," the girl continued, "is training the mind to distance itself from the body, and that includes the body's physical needs." Water, she had learned, was something the body would not do without. But food needn't be a priority. Despite his slim frame, it wouldn't harm him not to eat for half a day, a day, even a few days if it took that long. She knew from experience. Besides. Thirst didn't fade until it was sated; hunger came and went in waves. Any protests his stomach might be feeling now would likely be gone in half a bell. And as for sleep... a lack of sleep had helped her in her initiation. When one didn't sleep, their mind seemed to change somehow. Thinking got different. If Sullins decided to take a break Xii would remain where she was, resting her head back against the chest of drawers and waiting for him to do what it was he needed to do and return. Once he was back in place, or assuming he hadn't left at all, Xii would continue once more. "If you feel you've reached the greatest amount of detail you can attain in picturing the room, I want you to begin to add in yourself as an element. Remember what I said before: do not attach meaning to this image other than as another piece or part of the room. You cannot think of this person as yourself. You must think of it as just another object. The mirror, now, will help with this process. You should face it so that you might see yourself. Take in your appearance, then add it to the envisioned room until you once again reach the ultimate amount of detail possible. And," she said, resting her cheek on one hand as she looked over at the mage, "You must reach a point where you no longer have to close your eyes, but can hold the image of the room in your head even while your eyes are open and staring at the mirror before you." That part was a little tricky, and something that still messed Xii up from time to time. At the beginning, it was easier to learn to envision the room by closing the eyes, otherwise how would you know if you had memorized it? The same was true for envisioning oneself as a part of the room. But, after reaching past those first two stages, having the eyes open was a necessity. Otherwise, when the morphing process began, the morpher wouldn't be able to see himself, and wouldn't know what exact changes he was making. Eventually, when the morphing process was well-learned and familiar, the morpher wouldn't need the mirror or even the meditation. It took much practice. Xii herself wasn't yet that good. "So, to clarify, there are three stages in the initiation, and you have neared the end of the first. First, to close your eyes and have a detailed vision of the room that can be recalled. Second, to close your eyes and have a detailed vision of the room and yourself in the room that can be recalled, with the self reduced to the status of an object. Third, to open your eyes and achieve the same as the second stage. Only then will the proper mentality for morphing near. You will know you've reached the final stage when you feel a total disconnect with the body. Then you need only find a way to shape it with your djed and will." At the chest of drawers, Xii had settled into a position of patience. She would likely have to stay close to Sullins as he approached the third stage, because that was where morphing began. And if he didn't have the presence of mind to stop himself once he started, something Xii herself always struggled with, then she would have to be ready to stop him herself. oocHopefully this all makes sense. I think I mentioned before that I, myself, am not a good teacher.

[Clyde Sullins]

Perhaps Clyde would have been cautious of the girl, if he didn't know he had things well in hand. He wasn't the best of manipulators, but neither was he bad at it. And persuading someone to help him, and that such was in their own interest, that was something he was becoming increasingly skilled at. Even if she did try to kill him for some reason, he didn't doubt he would have trouble stopping her in time. He might overreact a bit, and might need a wall or two replaced, but he didn't doubt he could do so. Regardless of if he was in any state of mind to be using his more potent magics, he was confident in his own abilities. Besides, that seemed unlikely, and even in his sleep deprived state he could see that logically. He knew much he'd yet to tell or teach her, and the possibility of him protecting her and being her ally would likely be a powerful persuasive force. At some point in his sleepless night he'd pondered such things out, and seeing her once more he thought of them in passing again. But quickly enough he broke off his distracted train of thought, and focused back on the task at hand. It also helped that he'd seen many other magical initiations, and knew how they normally progressed, and so didn't find anything she'd done or told him to do so odd. Upon her direction, Clyde took retrieved his waterskin and took a drink, before returning to his rest position on the bed that he'd held through his meditation. Now though they were on to the next step of the process, of her instruction, the aforementioned step of adding in himself. He was to see himself as just another object, as a foreign object and non-entity. To break free of his awareness of himself. Taking the offered mirror, Clyde looked into it at himself, at not himself, at the object/person of his upperself. Such was the thought process he needed to ingrain into his mind, to believe. He carefully scanned the image he saw, holding it in his head as best he could. The length of the hair, its color, his skin, nose, lips. Ears somewhat covered by hair. The shirt upon the person. It was easier to think of the image not as a person, but as his upper self, a twin of his lower self. And his lower self was gaseous, malleable, easily shaped, able to bond and mix with other things. Both alive and inanimate, a force controlled by will. Existing as will. He knew from animation what the body was. Just a thing to house the soul, for the astral body to latch onto. Nuits body jumped, their form did not matter. What then did it matter what form he took? Clyde muttered under his breath as he closed his eyes, and did his best to properly picture his upper self, from the perspective of his lower self. As if he was that malleable force of will looking upon his mundane body, which was but a housing for his soul, an extension of his control. “This body I see is but a golem, a shell, malleable, possessed and controlled by me. Its form does not matter, only my soul, without limits or form.” Opening his eyes Clyde compared the image in the mirror to that which he saw in his head, noticing certain details he'd gotten off, and altering them in his head. A second time he repeated this, and a third, till he got it all right. Then he looked upon the reflection, and saw what he saw. Without thinking, his aura sight opened, djed pouring in with a small wave, and then a trickle, escaping from Cha held within his grip. A strand of awareness extended out, latching onto the mirror. In his aura sight he could see the mirror, see the reflection of himself it held, but saw it was but a mundane item, a picture. He was but a picture, a non person. In some odd way this helped, and Clyde grasped at the understanding, seeing that he was the mirror, the image within it, not concrete or constant, shifting and changing and malleable. “I am but that I am, a reflection of that I see and will be.” From within Clyde he could feel a... Changing... Nothing physical... But a turning of a wheel, locking into place, a place of comprehension. Clyde knew change. Chaos. Indecision. Will. All but an idea, a concept without corporeal form, just as Clyde was but a soul within a golem, a flesh suit that housed him, that he could move and control by his astral form.

[Xii]

It was a new experience to see someone following the path to initiation, and as such it was fascinating, especially considering that Xii had been the one to set the initiate upon it. As time rolled by, the young girl spent the ticks... chimes... bells?... observing all she could about Sullins as he concentrated on the mirror image of himself. She was a bit impressed by his skill in meditation. It had always been difficult for her to find a state of peace inside herself, and the peace that she did find was tenuous at best, as if the stillness was a piece of flimsy straw balanced on the sharp blade of a knife, ready to tip to one side or fall into halves at any moment. She had always thought of her meditative state as that of the calm before the storm, or the moments of patience and perseverance whilst on a hunt: a necessary distraction from the violence and chaos that waited just beyond. Over time, she thought she'd gotten better at finding and holding onto that peace... but Sullins fell back into his meditations much much much faster than Xii would have been able to, and perhaps faster than she ever might. Another thing that was different from that which she'd experienced: he spoke while he meditated, in little murmurs that she wasn't sure she would have caught without enhanced Zith hearing. He called himself a 'golem', a strange word that Xii could make no sense of, and she burned to ask what it meant but held her tongue, knowing he would be useless to answer her. He also spoke of his 'soul', a term her mother had sometimes used and one the Zithling girl had never quite grasped. Supposedly a soul was inside every person ~and animal?~ or something like that. But in all the surgeries that Xii had sat in on or assisted with she had seen no such thing. Then again, neither had she seen djed, but she didn't doubt that was real. She thought she physically saw it when he made the switch in his mind, or what she supposed was the switch, because what else might it be? His features smoothed a little, his body growing a bit relaxed, as if the concentration holding them had loosened, though she knew from his unmoving position that that wasn't so. No. It was something else. Some miniscule shift. The girl leaned forward a little, arms tucked around her bent knees, and peered even closer at the object of her attention, making certain that if she noticed any shift of feature or characteristic she would be ready. Once again she was impressed. He was making his way through the initiation so quickly it was as if he had been made for the magic, and if she hadn't been paying so close attention to what might happen next she would have felt a little sour about how long it had taken her in comparison. Quietly and calmly as she could, in a low even voice that would act as a backdrop to the near-silent room, Xii said, "Alright, Clyde. Good. Accept fully that you are not the the body. It is to be altered at will." She doubted the words might reach him fully where he had gone in his own mind, but if she spoke them gently they might act as if a work of hypnotism, though she laced no djed into her voice. She was merely trying to guide him. "Open your eyes and look upon the object that needs to be molded." She was speaking of his reflection, of himself. "Discover the way to work the changes. This part is up to you." Xii leaned back again, though her gaze on Sullins was no less sharp, and took a deep breath. At this point, she herself always imagined strings to be pulled, which in turn manipulated the shape and composition of her body. Sullins, however, would have to find his own way. She didn't know if this last step was something she would be able to teach him. Like hypnotism, it seemed to be based somewhat on instincts and preferences. So the young girl sat back, feeling stiff from the amount of time she had spent not moving, but no less intent to see what might happen next.

[Clyde Sullins]

Clyde understood. Something he'd discovered before about magic, or at least certain ones, the point of the initiation was to reach a point where you could grasp a concept foreign to yourself, something that innately could not be understood. By embracing that understanding, that single impossibility, using magic became possible. With voiding it had been learning to understand true and utter emptiness, true nothing. Here it was learning that your body was but an object, something to be molded and shaped, something apart from you as yourself. Or perhaps even that you as yourself did not exist, and was only a passing image or sight in the wind... Making a lie of your physical self, and telling the world what you should be. Now that he'd come to understand this thing that couldn't be understood, it was time to do magic, to morph himself. To alter himself. Mentally reaching out at himself in the mirror, willing his intent into himself, he felt for his djed, thrusting it forward in a hot rush of power. His focus was on his hair. Something simple and small. To shorten his hair. He was looking at his hair in his mundane sight, but also dual-ed within his aura sight. Mentally he reached out a hand, his will, and twisted at it, pulling it back, willing it to shrink and pull back, to change and alter. As he did this, one of the sets of hair did, retracting into his head as if growing in reverse. Only it wasn't his mundane hair, wasn't an action of morphing. It was his hair within his aura sight. Then if nothing else startled Clyde, breaking his concentration for a moment, and jerking him back as if something had just flashed in front of his face. Clyde blinked a few times, clearing his eyes, trying to understand what he was seeing, and what he wasn't. In his aura sight the hair had clearly changed, and now reflected himself with shorter hair. But in his mundane sight his hair was unchanged, which had been his intent. Probing outward and inward with his aura sight, Clyde searched his own aura, trying to puzzle the situation out. After a few moments of looking at his hair in his aura sight from this way and that, he saw it. A small sheen, a warmth of activity and change, subtle with a slight hinting of bright silvered djed... His own djed. Somehow in his attempt to morph, he'd managed to morph his own aura, to change it. To alter it. Perhaps he'd had the ability, and simply not realized it, only stumbling upon the technique in his attempt to change himself. But with the ease of it, of the change, he knew it wasn't due to morphing. Surely it was related to his aura work. However Clyde tried to suppress these thoughts till a later time. While being able to alter his own aura might be of interest, it was not his current focus. He'd have to figure it out later, test it out, but not now. Retracting his aura sight, Clyde returned to his mundane vision, and saw once more his long hair upon his head, the same as when he'd risen the day before. Long and unruly. Better, he thought to himself, to not use Auristics at all, lest he should accidentally use his new auristics technique. Instead he focused on his mundane hair, with his mundane sight, and willed the same hair to change, to shorten as it had done in his aura sight. Mentally he pictured his hair on his head, and then added a forge, his djed. He pictured the hair heating up as metal in a forge did, growing pliant and maleable, and then extended his will to force it into a new shape, into a new pattern. With that will he pulled, retracting the hair back. This time in his singular vision there was a sudden subtle change, a bit of hair shortening, and then another, as he focused his will on the single task of withdrawing his hair. He kept at it till the hair had receded an inch, then two, before halting, grasping at the hair and willing it to keep at that length. Unlike with his first attempt that had only occurred in his aura sight, this change was physical, and possible to be seen by the girl.

[Xii]

It was odd, to watch another person so intently. Xii had learned to people-watch over the course of her short life, simply because it was a necessity. To perform proper hypnotism, one had to know people, not just oneself. Watching others had become something of a habit because of that, as the young Zithling looked for the patterns in their behavior and tried to make sense of what they did and why. It also helped that Xii watched others so that she might remain safe from them; if her eyes were always watching, then it was less likely some stranger might sneak up on her, or if they tried at least she'd have time to react. But she had never paid so close attention to someone as she did to Sullins now. Probably because she'd never had a concrete reason before, just abstract. She hadn't been looking for something specific enough all those other times. Now she was. She was waiting for him to morph. For a long time he stared at himself in the mirror, and she wondered silently what he was thinking, if he was thinking anything, and how far along he'd gotten into the mentality. Once, he started a little and blinked a few times, and Xii held her breath, wondering if that might break his concentration and cause him to have to begin all over again. She didn't know if she'd have the patience for that. But it appeared all was fine. He settled back in and Xii let her breath out, her face stinging slightly as her cheeks puffed out with the sigh. And then, not too long later, it happened. At first she wasn't sure she was seeing anything at all. His hair seemed to move a little as if in a breeze, but the room had no windows and the door was shut. She wondered if he had moved his head, but she hadn't noticed. So she simply stayed where she was, though now she concentrated on his hair. And then it happened again. She was certain this time; his hair had moved, but by itself. She couldn't quite tell how, but she'd seen it. Xii shifted her back from where it leaned against the chest of drawers, and slid into a ready crouch, poised on her toes and fingers, watching unblinking like a cat. Over the next few chimes, Sullins' hair seemed to shorten in little bursts of activity, first at once place, then at another. Eventually, it had lost a pinch of length, then some more, maybe almost as long as one of her fingers. Xii wanted to clap her hands, caught up despite herself in the thrill of his achievement, and didn't know if he would even hear her if she did. She stayed where she was though, ready to spring forward at any moment. The girl didn't feel the need to speak, allowing her student ~what an odd thought~ to further explore this new ability as he saw fit, but prepared to intervene at any sign of internal duress. She was looking for the telltale signs of overgiving, at least as she understood them in relation to her own morphing: altered breathing as if out of breath, a sudden paleness as if the skin had gone bloodless or the opposite, a flush like that of fever, any sort of tremor, especially in the hands which might mean his body was growing tired. If he didn't try too much all at once, she needn't worry about the worse things that might happen ~bleeding was the main one she thought of, though by his warnings other, much worse things could occur. At the first sign of anything wrong, the girl would dart forward and shake Sullins roughly by the shoulder. That should be enough to wake him; in her morphing state, any little thing was enough to jostle her out. If it didn't work however, if he was in too deep for that, she would resort to a slap across the face. Whatever source of amusement might be had from that would be overshadowed by a hesitance as the young girl wondered if it was a good idea to lay hands on someone so powerful in such a way. But, should he resist her shaking, she would have no other choice. oocFeel free to rp Xii waking Clyde in your next post if you want to. Also, if you were confused by why her face might be stinging, I just got back a grade for a solo I did when Xii overgave, and the consequence was stinging skin for the next five days, which ends after the 11th, the day this thread starts. So she should feel a bit of discomfort here and there.

[Clyde Sullins]

Now that he'd cast the spell, had done the morphing, all that was left was to hold it. Focusing on the hair was it was, willing it to stay, Clyde sent a steady trickle of djed to that task. He pictured the hair upon his head as if it was a wig, something that could easily be altered and was not truly a living thing, but a item thing. For some reason this way of thinking of his hair mentally helped him to focus on his task. Perhaps it had to do with what Xii had said, about thinking of oneself not as a person, but as an object. Perhaps then hair was easier, since it wasn't alive in the sense that flesh was. While altering the length of his hair was a simple spell, for someone just learning to use the magic it was hard. The longer he focused on keeping his hair at that length, the more difficult it got. The he felt a strain. Perhaps it was moments. Perhaps chimes. Perhaps bells. Clyde was leaning towards chimes, but he wasn't fully certain, not when he was so focused on his task. Regardless of how long it took, eventually Clyde did grow tired, winded from his magic usage. Feeling the pressure of tiredness wash across him like a weight, Clyde waited a moment longer, and then cut off the flow of djed to his head, and through it his hair. Clyde felt a loosening of pressure as he let off, the drain easing and then vanishing. Though his hair did not return to normal right away. That would take time, though Clyde wasn't certain how long. But now that he was not adding djed to hold the spell, he did not doubt it would fade away and return to normal soon enough. Letting out a sigh and blinking, Clyde rubbed at his eyes with the back of his spare hand, and finally looked across at Xii. “Well... I suppose that went about as well as could be expected... Next time I'll try morphing Cha.” As he mentioned the staff, Clyde held her up momentarily, showing the blue wooden staff to the girl once more, or at least bringing attention to the length of wood. He did not elaborate on what he meant, nor on how he planned to morph an apparent wooden stick that was not a part of him, but then Clyde liked his secrets to a degree. And this was more of a surprise than a secret. She'd like see soon enough either way, when he did it before her. Not now though, he'd only just figured out the basics of morphing, and would likely need to rest and recover before his next attempt.

[Xii]

What happened next ~maybe ten chimes later?~ surprised Xii so much that at first she couldn't believe it. Then, as her mind came to accept what she saw, she felt a hot anger bubble up inside, though she tried to hide it well. The thing that annoyed her so greatly was how petching good at magic this Clyde Sullins seemed to be. She had been poised to awaken him at any sign of overgiving. But, just like that, he came out of the trance himself, looking over at her, speaking some nonsense about that weird blue stick of his, and she couldn't figure out how he'd done it. How had he woken up like that? How had he known when to stop? For Xii, she become so out of her body that she couldn't feel it any longer, couldn't help but overgive. But Sullins he just... just slid out of the state like he'd been doing it longer than she had. And that was irritating. Extremely so. Trying not to seem as peeved as she was, the girl tried to keep her tone light when she next spoke, settling out of her 'ready' pose ~poised on her toes in a crouch~ and back to the one where she leaned laxly against the chest behind her. She felt her fingers clenching and unclenching, and she stopped them, then asked evenly, "Why do you call it that? Like why does 'Cha' have a name, as if it's living? And why do you call it a 'she'? What is that thing?" Having that said, she moved onto the next topic, the one that was bothering her but that she hadn't wanted to seem too eager to breach. Now she approached it with a flat tone, as if it really wasn't that interesting to her, though it really was. "Also... how is it that you knew when to stop? The morphing, I mean." His hair had already sprung back to normal, an odd sight of sudden growth. Her old teacher had explained that at first it took concentration and djed to keep the shift in place, otherwise it would quickly undo. But, after a lot of practice and once the morpher got really good, it would become easier and easier for the shift to just... stay. Eventually, he'd said, the shift might stay forever, though she hadn't known if he'd been lying or not. Xii hated to admit her shortcomings, but now it seemed she had to face them. She continued on. "Because when I do it, I can't tell when to stop. I'm not me anymore. I'm just a thing, and things don't have feelings. So how did you do it? Is it just because... you have more experience, you think? With meditating? Or... would having something like that," she pointed to Cha, "help?" She still had no idea what the stick actually did. But she supposed, more and more, that whatever it was, it had to do with magic. Why else would he have kept it with him this whole time?

[Clyde Sullins]

While Clyde was new to morphing, he wasn't new to magic. He'd spent years honing his skills, and his instincts. Testing them through trials many a lesser man hadn't survived. Literally... Magic was magic to him, different but the same. Many of the principles, particularly of control, carried true regardless of the personal magic. If he could make himself stop when he was deeply steeped in Reimancy at the end of a battle, and force himself to end his casting with foes still bearing down on him, he could certainly stop himself after his first morphing casting in such a safe setting. Willpower and control were lessons Clyde had long since learned, and it clearly carried over to other magics. Her first question after he concluded his magic wasn't totally unexpected. In fact, he'd been expecting it ever since he'd first made mention of Cha. Considering the number of times he'd drawn attention to her, he was more surprised it had taken this long for her to ask. Her next question seemed a bit forced, a bit too even, and made Clyde wonder if there wasn't a bit more to her question than what she was letting him see. She seemed a creature of secrets, and perhaps this question related to one of those secrets? Hard to say with how little Clyde truly knew of the girl. Her question about Cha, asking if it was part of how he was able to stop casting, brought a bit more understanding to Clyde. The seemingly casual statement was likely anything but, and was likely what she really wanted to know. And unless he was mistaken... She was perhaps jealous of Clyde, simply for the act of not overgiving and continuing to cast after he should have stopped. This is nothing else made clear the girls lack of control, something he needed to work on her with. When he responded it was in a somewhat playful voice, as if he was half joking, or perhaps teasing. “Now isn't that rude, how'd you like it if I called you an it? Cha is no more a simple thing than you.” Clyde spent a moment petting Cha, as if he was consoling a small child or a pet, a smile on his face. Xii would likely be hard pressed to tell how serious he was... Or if he was simply messing with her. Or both. “As for how I knew when to stop... I felt the... Pull. I suppose that's how to word it. Feeding djed into a spell, as you near your limits, you start to feel a pull of sorts, kind of like undertow or strong current in water, pulling you onward. Not a physical sensation, but sometimes I feel it. Sometimes I hear it as a non-sound. Generally when I start to feel this pull, this need to continue casting, and particularly when there isn't an actual need to do so which that feeling would logically be based upon, I know its a good time to stop. The signs are there if you keep aware.” The last bit of her words though seemed a bit odd to Clyde, as they didn't seem in line with what he'd experienced in using morphing. But then perhaps his sensing of the non-sound, of the pull, was actually magic related, perhaps even to his auristics? He hadn't thought about it in a long time, but he supposed perhaps it was. Or perhaps he was simply more vigilant, and noticed the small signs that meant one was nearing there limits, and Xii was simply not used to reading these signs? Like a wanderer in a foreign land that could not read the signposts and warnings, Xii didn't see the upcoming cliff nor its early warnings. Clyde however metaphorically knew the local tongue and how to read it, and so understood what was coming before he made it to the edge. “I might be a thing, or not me, or a me that is a thing, or a not me not thing, but that doesn't mean I don't have djed, don't still have a soul, don't have an essence. Morphing simply changes the shell, not what it holds. And magic exists within that which the shell of our bodies hold. The body is just a conduit, just as in exuding res.” “As for Cha, she does what she does, but I am the one in control, I am the one that makes the choices. Magic and control, both are about choices. While Cha here might help me at times, might do things, I am the one with motive, with choice, with volition, directing her. She is not alive, but she is more than just a stick. She is magical in her own right. But a stone cannot by its own hand be thrown, cannot get up and hit someone, but when guided by a steady hand, even a pebble can fell a bird.”