Patience is a Virtue, Knowledge is a Gift (Torc)

[Vala]

Keeping her eyes closed, Vala brought her hand up to rub her aching head. Drawing her focus to Torc's voice, she opened her eyes gradually. At first, even the dim candle light seemed to shoot daggers into her pounding skull. It took her a few more chimes to finally acclimate to the real world and for the pain to die down to something bearable. Though it may have seemed that Vala hadn't caught Torc's remark about her being weaker than Dek, being incapacitated with pain and all, there was no way in Mizahar that she let that slip her notice. Thankfully she had been in enough pain to mask her sneer of animosity with grimaces of pain; she made sure to lock yet another one of Torc's hurtful criticisms in her mental book of never to forget slights - revenge was a dish best served cold. She wasn’t sure if Torc was being sincere when he asked if she was feeling better. For the past, only Priskil knew how long, he had been berating her as she had been trying her hardest to prove her worth – only to fall below the mark every time. She closed herself off to his pity. Allowing herself a few more moments in the emotionally peaceful respite she could only achieve while in physical pain, Vala forced herself to stop shivering. Her balmy palms were wiped against the side of her byrda, as she physically prepared herself for another round. Not stopping for a second to assess how mentally unstable she was, especially with several salty tears already half way down her cheek, Vala held up her shaking hand. It hurt, there was no question, but she had yet to prove her worth. Pushing through the pain Vala opened herself up again to the feeling, but this time, with her eyes open. She attacked the art with wild abandon, her eyes red with desperation. It was so different. The young woman nearly pulled back; it was just so shocking how much changed when she wasn’t forcing herself to use a sense so alien to her. It was only because Torc had forced her to sense it with her touch first, that Vala could still faintly feel that flickering energy writhing within her skin. The flaring that hurt her before, shattering her mental sanctum, was made clear to Vala as she watched the cloud, the aura, that surrounded her splayed fingers. Her eyes bulged out, straining the muscles, as she tried to capture the vision that flickered in and out of sight. It was there. She could feel it. She could almost see it. She was so close. Her breath hitched as she willed it to be, willed herself to see. The concentration Torc had suggested when she first began had been replaced with desire. While nowhere near controlled enough to be used for long periods of time or even accurately, it just enough to give Vala the motivation she needed to feel satisfied with herself, even if Torc wasn’t. It was a rare day when Vala managed to feel validated without another. “I can see it! It’s there. I can see my energy!” A whirlwind of emotions, the pain was now replaced by the feeling of triumph. It wouldn’t last, she was bound for bone chilling exhaustion, but she was rash, she was young, and she was finally, for that fleeting moment, happy.