I would have pounded my way into here on opening day but life has been anything but normal for me. Those who read this and know me, know this is nothing unusual. On July 29th I had knee surgery. The original intent was to do some repair work to my medial and lateral miniscus. About 11 years earlier I had gone through ACL surgery on the same knee ... I love basketball, but it doesn't love me back. While the Dr was in doing the miniscus work, he was also going to test the ACL. The ACl freyed undered the test and so was replaced.

The twisted part of this was that my wife had her 20 yr class reunion that weekend. I did not want to see her miss this event because it is a lifetime of great memories. Everyone should go to their reunion when the time comes. Luckily we own a Yukon Denali. I crawled into the very back of the vehicle, dropped the middle row to rest my leg, popped a few vicodin, and endured the 9 hr drive to NM for my wife's reunion. Thank God I was pain free from the surgery. I went through soreness from walking around (on crutches) and took time here and there to ice up and take a few more vicodin, but the trip was a success.

I'm back at work today and things are going well. As always, I have work to catch up on from taking ten days off, but I love my job so no complaints.

As for Mizahar, thank goodness this place is finally open!! I will always love the 'other' game world but could find no further inspiration to play in it. Too many times I saw claims to great things with no follow through from the owner. The staff would do their best for the players, but the owner would still manage to sweep in, screw it all up, piss off his staff, watch them all quit, and then scramble to restaff. The people made the game work, but the ownership simply managed to jack things up too often and then disappear. I did a lot in that game and wanted to do more, but began losing interest. Only my friends kept me around because I loved to talk to them.

Mizahar has given me a renewed...

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So yeah. Bloggity stuff. I played here a while ago, sometime back last Summer. Some of you may or not remember me, I wouldn't blame you if you didn't. I wasn't around too long and didn't make much of an impact. But I'm back now, and I hope to stay. I really do, Mizahar is a great place, with great people, and a great setting. Last time I was around, I didn't stay so long. I've told most of you that this was because of college burying me under work, which is true, but there was another reason. I wasn't particularly well received, as a person, especially in the chat. This was due to my rough manner in which I interacted with people. Which I found bitterly amusing, as some of the very people which I offended were extremely abrasive and sharp with anyone they didn't already know and like, which I still think is a bit..I don't know. Hypocritical. But hey. Humans. We're a faulty bunch. I know I have so many it's silly. Now, personally, the way in which I interact with people is just fine. Sure, I have plenty of bite to my banter, but it's all in good humour and I don't mean one bit of harm in it. It's just how I get on. It's how my family gets on, extended included. We mock each other mercilessly, embarrass each other and generally tear each other to pieces humourously. I have become painfully aware of how unusual this mode of interaction is, outside of my family. I've always had a reputation as a pretty mean guy, and as being a fellow you don't mess with. I attributed this to my height and general appearance, as well as my hostile demeanour. I wasn't always friendly and pleasant, I'm aware of this. I was young(er), I was angsty and I thought my life sucked and that I had every right to be angry. I did, and I didn't, in a way. I did, because to me, my life did suck. Ever since I was a kid, I was picked on...

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Us roleplayers, we’re not all that different from the Suicide Pac(k)t (reference to albert borris’s book). Going into this online writing relationship, every one of us has problems, and most are seeking ways to handle or solve those problems. You might have grown up in a poor home where you never got to wear or eat name brands. Your parents may have loved you too much, overbearing and pressing in on your life from all sides, or never loved you at all; they could have been cold, money-calculating human beings with no sense of how to raise a child with love. You might have never had a romantic relationship – you might be too ugly, too fat, too lanky, or too young; you never felt like you belonged in the crowd you had to belong in. Someone once told me that every writer in this community has a story, a reason why they are there and not out shopping in a mall somewhere, and he is absolutely right.

Loneliness or “the itch” are the two main factors I’ve recognized in my fellow roleplayers, and I know that both exist in myself at the same time. Loneliness develops naturally, from rejection or instability or both. The Itch is the craving that some creative peoples feel in the “gut” of their mind. It’ll push them to do something, change something, but until they really sit down with a pen, paintbrush, or a ball of clay, they can’t fully understand what it is they are supposed to do.

The moment I wrote my first story, I knew that I’d found something to satisfy that itch, albeit temporarily. Other kids feel that roleplaying gives them a chance to live in a different world, maybe even a fantasy world like Pandora or Middle Earth, where the sky (i.e. administrative rules) is the limit, and life always has an off-switch. With the internet, if you are so frustrated that you need to get up and walk away, you can. It’s as simple as that. No one is going to follow you into your room when you don’t want to see them, or call you a million times just to yell at you when you finally do a...

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Nope... I try to make a Character Sheet and it doesn't let me! I spent 3 hours trying to find out how to post, I figured it out. But how do i make that post Labeled as my Char. Sheet to be my Char. Sheet?