Today, i was surfing the web, searching for RP Forums, and i found this one! The world is amazing and I've decided on a Race, Ghost, and I have done most of the Bio at this point. Luckily i have experience in RP and some in DND, but never as a Game master, and it seems, everyone is there own game master to some degree, in this RP. The task of finishing my Bio is daunting. The questions almost endless... But im going to hang in there and get through this Bio creation process and soon, i hope..., ill be floating around the nation of Mizahar!! ^^ wish me luck.
Today i arrived at my new home...alone, isolated, didnt know what to do. I walked through the door and bam...i end up getting shoved to the floor. "what the hell took you so long Silver i missed you" "heya Rose...umm could you get of me please i kinda have to unpack" "oh sorry" Rose gets of, i walk to my room, open the door and bam i get shoved to the floor again... "Blaze i already got shoved to the floor once already" "sorry you know i love to glomp" "yeah of corse i do i have had to undure it for the past i dunno 6 years" "thats true" Blaze gets up and thats all that happened that day..i met my friends and now i live with them ..by the way *blushes* i think Blaze is kinda cute... *giggles*
My alarm went off at seven in the morning. I awoke unwillingly and hungover. I did not want to get up, I wanted this hour to never end. Once I got up, showered and out the door it would mean that it was true. Finally, realizing the inevitable I got out of bed. My apartment was cluttered with bottles of beer and wine- which explains my hangover. I had spent the prior night getting smashed, hanging out with Scott as we watched a movie to pass the time. After he went to bed I went to drink by the railroad tracks behind my house, called up my sister and brother-in-law. What we exactly talked about, I don't know, I just know there was a fair amount of yelling and carrying on. My friend Kate called and I think I continued my yelling, I was angry I had called her in the afternoon to hang out and it was now 10. I was projecting my grief and I hope now that I didn't say anything too terrible. Finally, feeling too sick to finish my last beer- I tossed it at a nearby parked train and it shattered.
For all my feet dragging I was going to be early getting to Colin's house. There was not much to get ready- shirt, tie, slacks, the clothes on my back. I grabbed my stuff, ate a yogurt, dropped off a couple bills in the mailbox and I was out the door. I drove by Colin's house and decided to get gas first as my final ploy at avoiding the inevitable. At eight I pulled up to their house, walked up to their door, took a deep breath and knocked.
We were going to say farewell to our friend Nick.
The drive was long and hot. My AC in the van had pooped out and we sat sweating listening to music and a couple podcasts. We chatted a little, trading a few Nick stories, mostly keeping things superficial until we got to Arlington Heights were Nick's service was. The truth was we were both probably numb with pain, saving ourselves for this day that no one saw coming. We had steeled ourselves years prior for news of this sort but Nick had got through his baptism by fire and...
"silver wake up, wake up..." "im awake im awake....what the hell its only 6 in the mornin go ahead wake me up..." "sorry silver but i thought you might wanna know.....Blaze he got taken by....them..." great start to the day right your friend/crush gets kidnapped by the worst gang in the world and the leader hates your guts great right.......well anyway i get dressed and end up searching for bout 4 hours for there base....when we find it bam......we find out that Blaze, the best guy in the world, has beaten them all up and is eating lunch......i mean talk bout time waster i got up at 6 in the mornin searched for a base opperated by the one person who hates me more than fluffy things...,p.s. his name is Chaos...thought i'd let you know, just to find out that i didnt have to get up at all... i mean not fair right... anyway me, Rose and Blaze walk back to the house. me and Rose eat lunch at the house and than we watch tv.......than 3 come round and smash....Chaos and two others come crashing through the window hell bent on revenge....and guess what happens Rose and Blaze take the two thugs and i have to deal with Chaos....great or what...basicly the two thugs are gone before i even blink and than my battle begins....Chaos does the usual ice blast attack and to put it simply i almost burn down the house before he runs...hehe i kinda get carried away when it comes to fire...., p.s. i can control almost all the elements, Rose is flowers and earth and stuff like that, Blaze is fire...kinda simple we also make an awsome team....*giggles* btw Blaze was awsome....... oh yeah and i thought sunday was ment to be a day of relaxation.
What of you had a great life and didn't even know it?
Lately I've been asking myself that as a reminder of good things. Tragedy is to be so caught up in what you're afraid of that you miss all the beauty directly in front of you, all the opportunities to love on people. And we are all afraid of so many things, some more than others. We're afraid our needs won't be met, that we won't matter, that we will be disliked, that we have fumbled things so badly there is no recovering. And if you are a writer, chances are you feel things a little more keenly, for both good and ill.
I think a solution to this is to be present. In this very moment what do you have? Who can you bless? I regret things I have done, but I've never regretted showing love. Not in the common sense of the word, but what it means at its foundations. Love is not being nice, it is being kind. It is not ignoring faults, it is seeing them and forgiving them. It is not doing what feels good, it is doing what's right. It is not placing yourself beneath another, it is removing your self from the equation entirely. Love is hard and it will not allow your pride to survive. It is the crossroads where you decide it is of more worth to value another person and their needs than to be right, heard or important.
I have not always been true to this. It is no easy task, but then real love wouldn't be so powerful unless it was a thing deep and high, something that enfolds all. Love has jurisdiction in both a kind word and a profound sacrifice.
Sometimes, people we can influence enter our lives and we spoil this opportunity. We use our power to wound instead of encourage. As I look at my sleeping husband, I know he is in my life for a reason. He is a...