Sha'lak

(This is a thread from Mizahar's fantasy role playing forum. Why don't you register today? This message is not shown when you are logged in. Come roleplay with us, it's fun!)

This is the first step to starting a lore article. Please hold all conversations about lores here in this forum. No development takes place here ie Article posting. This forum is simply for threads that want to hash out what a lore should or shouldn't include as well as its merits and flaws. One can also gauge interest in new lore here as well. Polls are encouraged.

Moderator: Scribes

Sha'lak

Postby Josh Caudle on January 9th, 2010, 10:58 pm

eve.jpg
eve.jpg (13.03 KiB) Viewed 180 times

The Sha'lak was the sword of choice for the Ancient Cmokan warriors. The Cmokan have mostly died out, but there weapons and fighting forms have survived the test of time.

Sha’lak- 1 ½ ft blade, 1 ½ ft haft. This weapon is a single edge blade, primary a two-handed weapon, allowing the wielder to spin the sword around to use its momentum to make strike with the many points of the weapon e.g. Cutting edge of the blade, back edge of the blade, and the hilt. Blocking with weapon is easy to understand, hard to do. Any edge of this weapon can be used to block.
This weapon requires at least a small knowledge of Tai'lak (fighting style of the Cmokans) to use. The better the knowledge, the better you are and more you can do with this weapon.

Cost- Depends on how you get it. The few remaining Cmokans could forge one for you. Or you’ll have to find a family that owns one. This weapon is very rare through out stores, who could charge anywhere from 100- gold rimmed mizas and up.
User avatar
Josh Caudle
Player
 
Posts: 27
Words: 3227
Joined roleplay: December 6th, 2009, 8:28 pm
Race: Human
Character sheet

Re: Sha'lak

Postby Gossamer on January 9th, 2010, 11:29 pm

I'd rather you not introduce a 'new' group of people that are totally unexplained in your development of this weapon. If you choose to do so, you should also do some development on the Cmokan at the same time. And since it mentions 'Tai'lak' as well (yet another of this mysterious Cmokan group) you need a writeup on that as well. I would prefer, however, that you stick to the races and references we've already got in the wiki unless your willing to do some major development.

Is it possible to simply develop a weapon without references to things that don't exist in the wiki or that need further explanation?

The blocking comment seems a little disjointed too.
Gossamer

BBC CodeHelp DeskStarting GuideRiverfallSyka
Special ProjectsSykafall Coordination


Mon Weds Fri: Mod Posts Tues Thurs Sat: PC Posts Sun: Quest Posts
User avatar
Gossamer
Words reveal soul.
 
Posts: 19347
Words: 5315980
Joined roleplay: March 23rd, 2009, 4:40 pm
Location: Cyphrus RS & Founder
Blog: View Blog (24)
Race: Staff account
Office
Scrapbook
Plotnotes
Medals: 9
Featured Thread (1) Artist (1)
Trailblazer (1) One Thousand Posts! (1)
Hyperposter (1) One Million Words! (1)
Extreme Scrapbooker (1) Power Fork (1)
Thunderspork (1)

Re: Sha'lak

Postby Liminal on January 9th, 2010, 11:44 pm

Goss's points echo the one I would make. I dig the .jpg though ^_^
Image
User avatar
Liminal
Atelerix albiventris
 
Posts: 1134
Words: 256379
Joined roleplay: March 24th, 2009, 7:09 am
Location: Abura / The Hedge
Blog: View Blog (3)
Race: Staff account
Medals: 2
Featured Contributor (1) One Thousand Posts! (1)

Re: Sha'lak

Postby Josh Caudle on January 12th, 2010, 2:59 pm

okay i have asked u bout it and was told to work on this frist then, the lore, then the race. So I introduced them. I dont what them to be a playable race, just a npc. ANd if thats not good enough ill make them totally exticted
User avatar
Josh Caudle
Player
 
Posts: 27
Words: 3227
Joined roleplay: December 6th, 2009, 8:28 pm
Race: Human
Character sheet

Re: Sha'lak

Postby Stitch on January 12th, 2010, 9:17 pm

Just a few tips to help you develop this further, and provide some questions for you to brainstorm. I like the weapon, it is nice, and unique, and I see why you are willing to work for it. :]

If the Cmokan warriors have died out, then how would one know the fighting style? I am assuming it is passed down somehow, to someone outside of the 'clan' or whatnot, but then that person would have to know about these warriors, wouldn't they? It is just too vague to say they died out, and then justify not having to write a detailed article on them, when people exist out in this world that may know their fighting style, as well as possess their weapons. What if someone goes out exploring for more information on these warriors, these people? They will need that lore in order to roleplay it. I know it can be a pain, but almost everything has to be explained when it comes to these things. It isn't too many questions to answer, really. Where were they located? Why did they die out? Were they just a sub-race/clan of humans? What were they like?

Even NPCs have to be detailed, as anyone in this world could interact with them if they choose, and they need to be able to do that.

Also, if the Cmokans go extinct, like you mentioned doing, then where would you get this weapon? In a store? 100 gold mizas isn't actually all that much money. A katana sells for that.

I don't mean to sound harsh, I really don't. I might just be bad at offering critique, and these are just some questions and comments I felt might help you out. If you really want to see this through, I wouldn't mind just continuing to point out little things here and there, if it doesn't bother you.

It would be much easier to fit it into the existing lore though, if you want to jump right in. Perhaps a discontinued weapon created by the roaming horsemen clans of the Drykas?
User avatar
Stitch
Blind Man
 
Posts: 859
Words: 498882
Joined roleplay: December 11th, 2009, 8:48 pm
Location: Syliras
Race: Human
Character sheet
Storyteller secrets
Scrapbook
Medals: 12
Featured Character (1) Featured Thread (1)
Lore Author (1) Peer Reviewer (1)
Trailblazer (3) Advocate (1)
Donor (1) Power Fork (2)
Thunderspork (1)

Re: Sha'lak

Postby Josh Caudle on January 14th, 2010, 2:27 pm

thanks i love all the comment and ill continue to work on it, and sorry goss if i was bad
User avatar
Josh Caudle
Player
 
Posts: 27
Words: 3227
Joined roleplay: December 6th, 2009, 8:28 pm
Race: Human
Character sheet

Re: Sha'lak

Postby Josh Caudle on January 14th, 2010, 2:27 pm

thanks i love all the comment and ill continue to work on it, and sorry goss if i was bad
User avatar
Josh Caudle
Player
 
Posts: 27
Words: 3227
Joined roleplay: December 6th, 2009, 8:28 pm
Race: Human
Character sheet


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 0 guests