[Open] Brooding

[Hannelora]

5 day of Spring 512 AV

The breeze off the ocean was unbearably hot and stifling. What normally would have helped relax Hannelora only served to make her even angrier. Her eyes burned red and her face was twisted into a nasty snarl. Everything made her mad these days, even being mad. She wanted to break something, anything, but she knew better. Most likely she would end up hurting herself anyway, and that surely would improve her mood. Glaring off into the harbor, she punched at the air. Hannelora was alone, she had made sure of that. This was not a time for her to be around people, especially people that where as angry and upset as her.

She should have been helping right now. The hold was melting and the flooding was extensive. Her room was already underwater. Thinking of that made her growl in rage. It took a few seconds for her to think again after that. “Of course my parents had to spring an engagement on me” She said out loud, not caring who heard. “And of course this load of polar bear crap had to happen.” It tore at her conscious that she was not helping, but what could she do. She had not received the mark of Morwen's, and she was not going to. Nor did she have any knowledge or skills that could help really. What she could be was another set of hands, but nor a particularly strong pair.

“Right now I would probably just cause more problems than help” Hannelora justified to herself. “I will help when I am less angry.” This made her feel a little better, but for some reason she still felt like breaking things. Forcing herself to calm down some, she tried to figure out the source. She was tired of being angry. Standing up to pace, her ragged red cloak caught in the breeze and billowed behind her. Hannelora was dirty and her clothing worn. Her leather pants were no worse for wear nor really was the leather corset of hers, but they still needed cleaning. Her poor green shirt how ever needed a lot of help. It was stained with dirt and ripped. She would have cleaned up if she could, but that was all the cloths she had on her.

“May this wretched heat burn them” Hannelora growled to herself, not meaning it. Her rage had rebounded as she thought about her parents. It was their fault she has not been able to save her things. Her mind traveled back to that fateful night, hoping to find a vent for her anger there.

“I AM NOT GOING TO MARRY HIM.” Hannelora thundered at her parents, her eyes burning a deep cherry red. “I Will Never Marry Him, even if he brings the figure head of the Morwen blessed Seafarer” She said starting to advance on them, but stopping not really wanting to get close. She was taller than both of them by some freak of nature, but not nearly as strong as her father.

Her red cloak wrapped around her as she stepped backward, her eyes still matching its color. Hannelore's eyes where locked with the green eyes of her father. He was managing to keep his calm, but red flecks could be seen in his eyes, betraying his own rage. If nothing else, his daughter had gotten that from him. “You do realize that you a being very childish right now, maybe you should go on to sleep with the other children and maybe tomorrow you will not be so cranky.” Her father's tone was dead serious, though Hannelora perceived some mocking there.

If it were possible Hannelora eyes flashed a even deeper red. Her fathers plan of embarrassing her into submission had backfired. For a long second they stared glaring at each other. One could almost see the tension between them, like a taunt string vibrating after being plucked. “I am leaving, and I will not be back.” Hannelora hissed looking away from her father. The anger and hurt was clear in her voice. Turning she left without saying another word.

Opening the door, she walked out of the private room belonging to her parents. Those that hand been close enough to hear stared, though she paid them no heed. Her eyes still held the red tint, but it was lighter now and flakes of blue, and pink shown through.

Getting though the main gate of the hold, Hannelora let out a slight whimper and felt warm steaks running down her face. She could not stop the tears, she tried, but she could not. She cried in rage both at herself and her parents. She cried for the hurt she had received and was causing. It was not really for her parents, she did not realize the pain she would cause them, but for her lover. Finally she cried for the lost future.

Shaking her head furiously, Hannelora banished the memory back to the past. It did not make her feel any better. Sighing, she sat back down on the dock and stared off into the bay. She was still angry, but it was better now. Hannelora sat there for several minutes longer, wishing that she was somehow gone. It was stupid. She knew it was not better elsewhere, but her heart told her it was. After a few more minutes staring, she got up and headed for Coldwater hold. That was still her home, and she would find someway to help.

(Vani)