Aralyn

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Aralyn

Postby Aralyn on June 7th, 2012, 7:17 pm

This is my first post so I'm bound to have a boatload of mistakes. If someone could tell me what they are that'd be great :)

PC Name: Aralyn
o Race: Inarta Human
o Age: 20
o Birth Date: 494 AV
o Gender: female
Physical Description
• Aralyn stands at a height of 5’7’’ and weighs 145 pounds of nearly pure muscle. Years of training have burned the baby fat from her body and her face lost its innocent look long ago. Fiery red, shoulder length hair frames the sharp features of her face and her piercing green eyes. Her skin is clear and light.
Character Concept
Aralyn is extremely stubborn and sharp-tongued. When she has an opinion on something she will express it regardless of the views of those around her and with little thought of what the consequences of said opinion could bring. She is distrustful towards strangers, guarded when it comes to her personal life, and arrogant. Although she may not appear it Aralyn is intelligent. She's not book smart but she knows her way around the lower sides of civilization. She would rather be hanging around thugs who will kill you as soon as look you than conversing with people of a higher, more noble class. Aralyn isn't a girl who's about to let anyone tell her what to do or how to do it and she rarely accepts charity of any sort.
Character History
o Aralyn left Wind Reach at the young age of 4 by no choice of her own. Her mother left the place to travel the land of Mizahar and she took Aralyn with her. During the travels Aralyn’s mother was killed and robbed while Aralyn had left to get water. She had returned just in time to see the Myrian bandit fleeing from her mother's corpse. Aralyn was left with nothing but a name, the clothes on her back and her mother’s falcon. She managed to find her way to the city of Syliras after her mother's death. Aralyn holds a grudge against the entire Myrian race because of what happened to her mother and its a grudge she won't let go of anytime soon.
Training & Skill Points & Lore
o Falconry (20pts)-starting kit)
o Weaponry- long bow( 30pts- starting kit)
Equipment/Possessions
o A dark green traveler’s cloak
o Worn boots
o Long sleeve shirt
o Simple slacks.
o 15 year old falcon named Kai (heirloom)
o 20x20 apartment (starting package)
o 1 Waterskin(starting package)
• 1 Backpack which contains:
o 1 Set of Toiletries (comb, brush, razor, soap)
o Food for a week
o 1 eating knife
o Flint & Steel
Lore
o Knows what wild berries are poisonous and which are edible
o Basic care of falcons
Ledger
o 100 gold rimmed mizas.
Last edited by Aralyn on July 23rd, 2012, 7:22 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Aralyn
Player
 
Posts: 3
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Joined roleplay: June 7th, 2012, 4:46 pm
Race: Human, Inarta
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Aralyn

Postby Shepherd on June 16th, 2012, 1:06 am

Image

Hello new adventurer!

Welcome to Mizahar! My name is Shepherd, and I am here to assist you in completing your Character Sheet in a manner that is respectful to the Lore and overall theme of Mizahar. I have found a few areas of confusion and error, and I'm here to work with you to set things straight.


Things Needing Fixed
 
Skills
I noticed that you have 35 points in Longbow. The maximum amount of points you can have in a skill is 30, so you need to put those 5 extra points elsewhere.

 
Possessions
You must purchase your Gloves and deduct the cost from your ledger. Prices found in the Price_List

Your falcon must either be purchased or labeled as Heirloom.

 
Lores
I noticed that you had no starting Lores. All players may have 2 Lores, which are specifics bits of information your PC knows over a variety of topics.

 
Minor Notes
These things do not need to be changed, but I would recommend you looking into some adjustments.

You should probably include a day on which your PC was born, the Calendar can help with that.

The fact that your PC grew up as a child thief in Syliras, the city with the highest security seems highly unlikely, as the Knights would likely put you in an orphanage or have someone adopt you.


Please make the changes I've noted above, and send me a Private Message. Upon receiving your message, and reviewing your changes, I will remove the Intervention. Thank you for coming to Mizahar, and I hope you enjoy writing here.

Shepherd
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Shepherd
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Joined roleplay: February 2nd, 2012, 1:22 pm
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