Day of the 45th of Fall 512 AV
Gin was sitting in her tent. Looking at her injured hand, and sighing. She really wanted to play her harp. So badly she thought multiple times to just play her melodies against the doctor's orders. But she could not do that. She could not risk harming her hand any more than it was. She sighed again.
Well, if she could not play, at least she could go over the basics that she had started going over with Viper just two days ago. She looked at her hand and growled at herself. Why did she have to let him go right in the middle of the crowd. Why did she have to go through those horrible halucinations, and right in front of him. How much had he actually heard? Understood?
What about their relationship suddenly starting right after? Why did it all feel like a dream that she could wake up from at any moment? She wanted to cry again. But she had done enough of that two days ago. So much had changed in so little time.
And her emotions seemed to be running wild. Now she felt herself longing for Viper again, for his smiles, his hugs... his kisses. She blushed and raised her hand to her lips. Tracing the outline of them, shivering. How many kisses had they shared already? It seemed so unreal. Like a pleasant dream she did not want to end.
She blushed even more, why was she like this. She was starting to feel scared of herself. How she acted towards him. She felt that some of it was majorly influenced by the dream she had had that night before she ran into him. Was that bad? Was she allowed to unleash the part of herself that she had be forcing herself to hide. This other her that she was choking to keep herself safe?
But had it really kept her safe? Not letting her feral side out. She did not know. And she never truely would know. Not until the time came when she would tell herself, 'I could have used this before'. But she could already feel herself doing that for that day, Viper had started to teach her how to use a saber. And she realized. That she could have been learning self defence a lot earlier in her life, and maybe, just maybe, she would have stood a little more of a chance against that Zith.
She shivered. Enough of these gruesome thoughts. She was going to work on music theory. On the ifs, buts and hows of the harp. She turned to her harp and smiled, "hello again dad." She whispered sweetly as she opened the case and caressed the precious carved wood of her harp. Her father's work. Now her instrument to connect to her parent's beyond this life.
She picked it up carfully and set it in her lap. "Okay Gin, let us review the basics."
She moved the harp towards her a bit more, "Close to the body but not so close it give you chicken wings as you play." She smirked at her poor joke but she continued. "Back straight, making sure your spine and shoulders make a T." She yawned a bit, having not been able to get much sleep because of her hand, it was making it hard to concentrate. She shook her head "wake up" she whispered to herself.
She looked at her right hand, using her left arm the balance the harp on her lap. "okay.. like a baby waving. Open, close, open close." As she said this, she opened her hand when she said open, and closed her hand when she said close. A small grimace appeared on her face when she did this. Why had this affected Viper the way it had when she said this. Why had he looked away when she asked if he had seen a baby wave? Did it have to do with .. what he lost.
This thought made her sadder then she wanted to be. It was a horrible thought, but it could have happened. She knew it was not an unreasonable thing to think, it was just horrible. She pushed the thought away and went back to going over the basics.
"Keep your body relaxed. Do not let yourself tense up. It can be heard when you play." She purposely tensed all her muscles and then let go of all the tension. Letting out a breath of comfort and ease. She could feel, at least, that her body was relaxed enough.
"Now.. There are seven letter's used in music. A, B, C, D, E, F, and G." She giggled as she remembered when Viper thought there was a J string. My god that man was going to need major musical assistance. She giggled again, of course it was the same with her and sword play, so she could not complain.
"So, if you play a low pitch, and then skip six strings, and play the seventh string. It will be the same note, just a higher pitch." She thought about this for a moment, well.. she could see why it was hard to understand. Though it was a basic part of music, many people did not understand why the letters did not just continue, but repeated.
She just felt it was second nature to her, cause she was taught at a very young age. She smiled, oh well, she would figure out how to get him to understand. Hopefully, it would not be too hard. At least.. it was not a physically arduous task, the thing was. It was mentatlly arduous, Counting, memorizing, improvising, key changing, time signatures, tempo's, and that was just a few of the bigger items on the menu, there was also accidentals, glisando's, ritards, crecendo's, decrecendo's, and so much more.
She almost thought it would be impossible to tell him how this worked. And a lot of it applied to singing as well. And when you paired harp playing and singing together, you had to think of everything doubly, and be cordinated to do it all. She sometimes wondered how she even did it.
She sighed and put the harp down on the ground in front of her. How was she going to teach herself more? She wished she had a way to put music down on paper. But somehow she felt the music would lose it's meaning that way. And how many musician's now aday's even did that? Did not everyone play by ear and memory?
She sighed, maybe she was just wildly dreaming, but sometimes she did that. Wildly dreaming. She blushed again. She had to stop remembering that dream. This Ricky fellow, she felt like he understood her in a wild and crazy way. She felt that she should go and find him, but where would she start?
She shook her head, she could not do it. Not now that she was with Viper. She owed it to Viper to stay, even though she felt like she owed Ricky more than she had given him. She had only seen him in a dream. Why was she even CONSIDERING him over Viper.
She placed her hands on either side of her head. Was she so messed up in the head to go chasing after a litteral dream guy? It was worse then going after some one night stand. Not that she had ever had one, but still. Nut's crazy, never! Maybe... someday.
She sighed again. She was just confusing herself more. She again decided she needed to push the topic out of her head.
"Gin, what are you going to do with yourself?" she talked to herself, knowing that her tent neighbors's could probably hear everyword she had been saying. She laughed at herself, let them think what they want. She thought better when she spoke... Most of the time.
She layed back and sprawled out. Mizahar, was she tired. Her eyes started to flutter closed as she lay there, letting the noise of the city lull her to sleep. Her body welcoming the much needed rest with open arms. She turned in her sleep and smiled. Whatever she was dreaming about it was good.
