Open I'm Sorry

[Kreig Messer]

Summer Tenth, 1513 A.V. It was the same one, the one thing that kept him from proper sleep, the one that left him awaking with a sweat, the one that left his heart beating madly as he breathed deeply to calm himself from the guilt that threatened to swallow him whole. Nearly every day he would have it, nearly every day he would be reminded of it. He wish he would be done with it, to finally forget, but what had he done to earn such a thing? How could he forget such guilt? How could he atone for it? He had no answer, dor did he bother asking others for the answer…. For he feared the abandonment it may incur, he feared the maddening loneliness that would bring the memories flooding in his waking hours, he wanted peace in those hours at least . He had never told his patron, who suspected such guilt. He had never told Orion, who could probably see the affects it had upon his head. He had not told Percival, for how could he understand such guilt and forgive it…..nor had he told Fallon, in fear of the same yet also fearing the loss of something greater than mere friendship, something he had yet feared to reach out for. He was back in that Alley, at the spot of filth he vowed to safe guard for friends whose faces he had not seen in so long. The Alley looked so much darker, so much dirtier and infinitely bigger. The Walls seemed to be dripping tar mixed with blood and one the walls looked as pink as flesh and....pulsated? It never pulsated before Krieg thought, suddenly he turned and saw three people; himself swing that wooden blade and from a small distance away to individuals drabbed in cloaks, one half the height of the other. The Man looked different then when he was in life, his eye slots void of eyes, part of his skin seemed to have rot away as he could see a skeletal grin from the right side of his fac. The smaller figure…infinitely obscured by the hood his cloak provide, stood silently as the man approached the dream version of Kreig. The real one could only watch as the strings of his heart were pulled as he knew the conclusion, and this was but the remainder of how it began. The strings seemed to break one by one as the Man and Dream Kreig exchanged banter before the battle to death began, like two friends competing to see who’ll buy first round at the tavern. Real Kreig felt one of the strings in his heart break like the string from a lute or harp, and he knew only more would be broken. He wanted it to end! He wanted to shout! He wanted to stop the bloody fight that brought him this Guilt! “STOP DAMN YOU, THIS ISN’T WORTH A STUPID SPOT” He thought he said in one dream, and he thought he’d done so again. But no voice came, his lip did not twitch as he had no control over this debacle. The fight itself was intense but brief, Dream Kreig attempting to block the mans blow with a wooden blade while the man attacked expertly with his steel one. Both enjoying there time, both indulging in the thrill that came in battle…both so blind and stupid…so very very stupid. ‘PLEASE LET ME MOVE’ He thought ‘OR LET ME WAKE! PLEASE!’ He Begged silently to whoever could here, which was no one. A sinner has no right to bark against their punishment, after all. Eventually the wooden blade snapped, and Kreig felt multiple stings within him snap, his chest becoming increasingly heavier as if here lugging about steel. His Eyes widening in despairs as a single tear swept down his face. They were both on the ground now, a brief struggle for dominance that ended up with the Man victory, while Dream Kreig lay on his back with a broken blade. Again they spoke brief words, like damn old friends, no hard and feelings and what not…but for Kreig, that couldn’t be farthest from the truth. Because quickly another string broke as the man looked down and found a sharp piece of wood lodged to his side, and promptly fell dead. Leaving the short individual. As his dream self smiled, feeling accomplished as he stood up and dusted himself off from dust and dirt. Only for the short individual to charge at him with a dagger raised. The Dream Self blocked the attacker, only for the hood to fall of its head and its face seen so clearly now, seemingly brightening up the place as it seemed to return to that summer’s day from year before. “PUSH HIM AWAY YOU DOLT, JUST PUSH” He attempted to shout, but no voice came as Dream Kreig attempted to calm the child who tried to kill the brawler in retaliation for the fallen parent. It was when the child got a lucky stab through but caused Kreig to push him back…with the back of his fist. The boy, so young and Kreig’s punches so strong, fell limp to the ground. All the strings had snapped as Kreig’s heart seemed to fell in an endless abyss within him, yet brought down considerable weight as his dream self- as he- realized at what he had done. Kreig fell down to his knees and so did his dream self, and found himself staring face to face at the young corpse…found himself repeating those words as he shook the boy. “Oh Gods, Boy, wake up….WAKE UP….please” He said “I’m sorry, plese wake up, I’m SORRY” He constantly repeated as he shook the body, hoping that he could wake him him, cause him to stir…ANYTHING. But he knew that wasn’t so…And then he simply cried…. Frozen in place as he stared at the corpse muttering over and over how sorry he was. Chain’s emerged from the dark corner of the alley, slowly piercing through Kreig’s body then exiting as it wrapped itself around his form mixed with his blood, till his form was unrecognizable under the sickening chains as he was dragged into the dark shadows constantly muttering through whimpers and sobs….. “I’m Sorry”