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It must be well into the night by now, though it wasn’t obvious due to the lack of windows assuring a constant darkness no matter the time of day. Izuyanai had thought she had outrun her sadness and loss, but it was slowly catching up to her and surfacing in the thawing workings of her mind. She almost panicked. The wave of grief was almost tangible and she didn’t want to face it. At least not now. Desperately, the Kelvic reached her thoughts out to Lady Akajia. She wasn’t sure if she wished to ask anything, but seeking her out was something to cling to. Familiar yet entirely unknown, perhaps she would watch over her.
Gradually, the enveloping shadows and quiet worked to comfort her. It gave her thoughts enough control to push the threatening wave down and barricade it from resurfacing. She wouldn’t allow herself to dwell on the grief. No, that could be examined another time. Slowly allowing it to be picked apart by time first. Right now it needed to be kept in the furthest corners of her mind. More than anything Izuyanai was afraid of what would happen if she looked too deeply into it too soon.
Her usual sense which had either fled or had been drowning, drifted back into place, resuming their familiar whirl. The worst part about that was that Izuyanai now had a fairly good idea as to why Iriya had perished. Yes, of course the Zith attack, but she was confident that she knew him well. He could fend for himself and besides, he could simply shift and escape in the confusion of the attack. He was after all, a swift and inconspicuous bluebird. No, it was his kindness that led him to his demise. She knew that he had stayed behind to help defend everyone else. He must have been fatally wounded then. Stupid stupid idiot brother. He should have left well enough alone and come back safely. But then, he wouldn’t be the same person she knew.
They had looked quite similar in their human form. Anyone would have been able to tell at a glance that they were related. Same jet black hair, same intense blue eyes, and similar facial structure. The differences they did have were height, with him being remarkably taller, and the expression of their eyes. Iriya’s had been more open with steady kindness and bright mirth. Izuyanai’s were bright as well, but not with the same warmth. Her eyes were lit with shrewd curiosity and interest. She hadn’t been the beacon that so many gathered around. It was perfectly understandable of course. She had always been looking out for herself, being merciless and vengeful when she believed that the situation called for it. Never trusting completely and always questioning what seemed to be. The raven had prided herself in being able puzzle out humans and Inarta, seeing through to their selfishness.
The Kelvic sighed heavily in defeat. Perhaps she had been jealous of her elder brother. His caring and selflessness was a kind of courage that the young raven did not yet have. Naturally, she doubted him at first. She had always wondered at his nature and was curious to see if he had any hidden motives to his actions. So many people did, whether they meant well or not. However, as she laughed along to his antics, she soon came to realise that his did not seem to be a self-centred motivation, rather a conclusion. It was almost easier to dismiss Iriya as a simpleton who didn’t know any better, but Izuyanai had long since dashed that possibility. He was smarter than he let on and by listening carefully, the raven had picked up a handful of comments that all pointed to something in his past. However, even after he had proved himself to the end, Izuyanai was no closer in fully understanding his conclusion. To her, Iriya was the ultimate curiosity, snatched away before she could solve the mystery.
How dare the Zith. The had no idea what they had destroyed. To them, Iriya had just been another object of the hunt. She could never forgive that notion. How dare they. Through the scorching anger, Izuyanai could already feel that she missed him. Along with all of his other qualities, it was his smile that the raven treasured the most. It had the ability to draw out the most genuine of her own smiles and could persuade her to shelve her cynical view of the world. It had another strange influence as well. The raven kept catching glimpses of it in other people’s joyful expressions, though at the time she had dismissed it merely as an interesting fact. However, even now that he was gone, it shone through to her and tugged her away from the searing flames within her. |
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