[Note by Meadow] Ikais Icestone

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Ikais Icestone

Postby Ikais Icebringer on September 16th, 2017, 10:05 pm

Character Name: Ikais Icestone


Appearance:

Race: Human, Drykas
Gender: Male
Age: 23
Birthday: Thirty-First, winter, 494
Birthplace: Riverfall

Appearance: Ikais has light-almond brown eyes and similar hair. His eyebrows are a darker brown than his hair, his skin is a bit tan from traveling in the sea of grass, his hair is shoulder-length, usually pulled back in a ponytail. He is well built, and his windmarks cover his right arm, right shoulder blade, and parts of the right side of his back. He is five foot nine inches tall and weights one-hundred and seventy-six pounds.

Character Concept: Ikais is action-oriented, based in the here and know, rarely wonders about the future, unless on a journey. He is impatient with long answers, and loves traveling and adventure. He has a sleight fear of large heights and is at his best when on solid ground.

Character History: Was born in Riverfall, where his parents were on business. He was given the surname Icestone because he was born in the winter. His parents and he are apart of the diamond clan. Even though his mother was a warrior, his father was a trader. He grew up loving the stories of his mother, who traveled the sea of grass, told by her, or someone else. He grew up learning the ways of the blade from his mother, and the ways of riding from his father. Soon, once he was good enough to ride alone, he would accompany his father to Endrykas, he loved the openness of traveling, and has found himself doing it ever since. In those years of traveling, he learned how to track, and how to trap, to ride, and to fight in the ways of a scimitar. Everyone, even the blind, the deaf, and the mute knew he would get a strider soon, and he did. At age eighteen, a Strider chose him. The Strider’s name was Kais. Ikais would take up the name Kais, but with an i prefixed onto it. His mother fell ill with a persistent fever during the summer of 513. The fever would consistently leave and return every now and then. He and his father did everything in their power to help their loved one. Every time, this fever would leave, it woud stay with her anywhere from two days to two weeks. He soon decided, before his twenty-third birthday, he would travel to Endrykas, his father accompanied him, but had to leave because of complications in his mother’s illness. Unbeknownst to him, his father died on the journey back to their pavilion. Now, having just arrived in Endrykas, he will help best he can.

Language: Pavi, common

Fluent Language: Common
Basic Language: Pavi
Poor Language: Tukant


Skills

Skill EXP Total Proficiency
Foraging 10 SP 10 Novice
Weapon:Scimitar 20 SP 20 Novice
Riding(Horse) 10 RB 10 Novice
Hunting 10 SP 10 Novice
Wilderness Survival 10 SP 10 Novice



Lores:
Lore of Cyphrus Plants
Lore of the Creatures of The Cyphrus Plains

Possessions:

1 Set of Clothing (Colorful)
-Simple Shirt (red)
-Simple Pants (black)
-Simple Undergarments
-Simple Coat (dark green)
-Simple Boots (brown)
1 Waterskin
1 Backpack which contains:
-Comb (Bone)
-Brush (Bone)
-Soap
-Razor
-Balanced Rations (1 Week’s Worth)
-1 eating knife
-Flint & Steel
100 Gold Mizas

Heirloom: Mother’s Scimitar. His mother received this scimitar on her first, and last journey outside of The Sea of Grass. It is made of simple iron, and is a simple blade, slightly chipped in places. The reasons why he holds this blade dear is one; it reminds him of his mother, and two; it gives insight to the dangers ahead of him. His mother almost died on many a journey, luckily, Ikais had a mother to grow up with. The pummel and hand-guard are carved with interact designs, reminiscing of Drykas culture. The slightly curved handle (made to comfortably fit the hand) is wrapped in a strip of leather or fur.

Housing


House: 1 large tent (4 person)
1 large tarp
100 ft of rope
1 lantern
2 torches
1 bedroll
1 blanket
1 set of fishing tackle & hooks
1 bonded Strider; Kais.
1 Yvas
1 large set of Yvas bags







Ledger
Purchase Cost Total
Starting +100 GM 100 GM




Thread List
Ikais Icestone
Ikais Icebringer
Player
 
Posts: 2
Words: 1979
Joined roleplay: September 2nd, 2017, 1:30 pm
Race: Human, Drykas
Character sheet

Ikais Icestone

Postby Meadow on October 26th, 2017, 3:31 pm

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Hello dear,

There are a few issues with your CS none of them are major, but do need to be fixed.

1. If you are going to leave your tables white, then put a darker color to the writing. It is hard for me to read as is. That means graders will have a hard time checking your CS for maxed out skills.

2. The lores are rather broad. There are a lot of plants and animals, you need to narrow the lore down to something more specific under those lines.

3. Since I know from having my own PCs, go ahead and set up a tab set for your lores and possessions(if you want). It is easier to track everything not only for you when updating from grades, but also for graders to make sure they are not giving you the same lores multiple times

4. Your title needs to match the name that you log in with. If you log in as Ikais Icebringer then that needs to be the title of your CS

This has nothing to do with your actual CS it just a pet peeve of mine. Please don't start a sentence with a verb and watch your verb tense switches in your writing. It causes the reading to be very choppy and hard to follow.

Please send me a PM when you have these issues resolved and I will green mark you
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Meadow
Even the prettiest flowers can kill
 
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