[Issues found by Astator] Fessenden

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Fessenden

Postby Fessenden on December 28th, 2015, 2:46 am

Fessenden


Appearance

Race: Ghost (Formerly Human).
Gender: Male.
Age: 75 Years
Birthday: 44th of Spring, 365 AV.
Birthplace: Syliras

Appearance: Fessenden, despite being relatively youthful for a ghost, looks as elderly as he did on the day he died. He stands hunched over at about 5 feet, and could pass as a corpse were it not for his translucent skin. He looks deathly pale, and is constantly followed by trails of soulmist in his wake. His face is incredibly wrinkled, with pale bloodless lips and constantly bloodshot red eyes. He always manifests in formal dress in an attempt to emulate his living self, although the effect is somewhat ruined by their torn-up, bloodstained appearance. Fessenden is missing his left hand, and the stump is constantly shrouded in a thick cloud of soulmist.

Character Concept

Fessenden was, in both life and death, completely and utterly devoted to the pursuit of knowledge. He considers gaining further understanding of the world's mysteries more important than anything else. This complete focus has allowed him to remain working even after his death. However, it has also had some major consequences. He is somewhat limited in his ability to associate with others, as he tends to view them more as tools for achieving objectives than as actual friends. It has also given him a rather sizable ego about his abilities and knowledge, and he takes being outdone in his specialties very poorly. Pretty much the only people he somewhat respects are those who show just as much singleminded devotion to their goals as he does.

Character History

While he was alive, Fessenden was considered an odd member of an odd family. Born on the third tier of the city to two scholars, Edwin and Julia Fessenden, he was taught from birth to focus on acquiring new knowledge and experiences. As he grew up, he became a total recluse, only coming out of his quarters to get more books and scrolls. This cycle continued until he got his own home at the age of 20, and the Syliran Knights became interested in his lack of a job. Unimpressed by his insistence that his studies took the highest priority, he was swiftly "recruited" into doing hard labor in order to avoid arrest. The young man was irritated at these interruptions to his research, but chose to go along with it to avoid worse punishment.

Thus Fessenden may have continued his life uneventfully, researching in secret during those scant few hours he was not working. However, with the deaths of his parents one after the other when he was 50, things changed. When he returned to his old home, he found a veritable treasure trove of their old work and findings. Inspired by this, he returned to his old reclusive ways of studying and searching.

The next several years saw an astonishing change in his demeanor. Those few acquaintances he had made in his years of working were shocked when he cut almost all ties with them. He grew more and more ill and malnourished as further years passed, having been spending almost all of his earnings on materials and books instead of sustenance. Eventually, he grew too unhealthy to do his job properly, sustaining several serious injuries in his work, including losing one of his hands. By the time he was 75 in 440, he was a completely broken man, physically and mentally. After days of not showing up to his now far less physically demanding job, he was found at his desk with a knife buried hilt-deep in his chest, an undecipherable book under his body. After a brief period of investigation, it was declared that he had gone mad and committed suicide.

However, so intense was his desire to decipher this final mystery, he manifested as a ghost. Though he still bore the physical wounds of his actions, his mental faculties remained in their full capacity, and he began to devote himself fully to his work, no longer needing to fulfill human desires. While there were occasional attempts to dispel him, it was decided that as long as he kept out of sight and focused only on his work, it was safe to leave him be. After several decades as a spirit, he shed his first name in an attempt to distance himself from his time as a human, keeping only the family name of Fessenden as an identifier. This is how he remained until 515, poring over books and tomes.

Language

Fluent Language: Common.
Poor Language: Jamourian

Skills

Skill EXP Total Proficiency
Materialization 26 SP 26 Competent
History 20 SP 20 Novice
Soulmist Projection 14 SP 14 Novice


Lores

Helpful Lores:
Lore of Syliran History
Lore of Religion: Eyris

Possessions

1 Set of Clothing
-Simple Shirt
-Simple Pants
-Simple Undergarments
-Simple Coat
-Simple Boots
1 Waterskin
1 Backpack which contains:
-Comb (Wood)
-Brush (Wood)
-Soap
-Razor
-Balanced Rations (1 Week's worth)
-1 eating knife
-Flint & Steel
100 Gold Mizas

Heirloom: An undecipherable exquisite book, containing forbidden and mysterious knowledge. It could be anything from a recipe to the secrets of the world's beginning. This is the book that Fessenden discovered in his old family home, that drove him mad and caused his initial death.

Housing

Location: Syliras

House: Fessenden is situated in the small apartment in the Citadel where he died. It is very small and has almost no furniture but a bookshelf, bed, and desk, but he considers it his main base for research. However, he does regret having to sell off the occasional book in order to not lose it.

Image

Ledger

Purchase Cost Total
Starting +100 GM 100 GM
Bookcase, Fine -40 GM 60 GM


Thread List
Fessenden
Player
 
Posts: 3
Words: 2000
Joined roleplay: December 27th, 2015, 7:37 am
Race: Human

Fessenden

Postby Astator on December 29th, 2015, 6:28 pm

Image

Hello there, there are unfortunately some grievous errors you must fix before you can continue.

  • Your age and Date of Birth do not line up, please fix this. Either change your age to correspond with your date or change your date of birth to match your age
  • How did Fessenden learn Jamouran Grunts? Ghosts, nor humans, have the ability to speak it.
  • Your Skill set lacks your +15 Racial Bonus in Materialization. Please change this. Also you cannot start above 30SP including the RB, please readjust your skill set accordingly.
  • Your lores are too broad. What of the Syliran Culture? How did Ben learn anything about the Svefra Culture and what?
  • Your heirloom CANNOT be an exquisite book, that would be something that would've been found upon your character's death and confiscated by the Knights of the Syliras. Please change this. These are extremely rare and anything with indecipherable texts in it implies it has the ancient tongue written into it making it more than the 50 GM, and possibly magical (which an heirloom can't be anyway). Therefore even with it not being magical it would also not be something just lying around post-death. Please make this change
  • Please attach your character sheet to your profile. If you require assistance with this please let me know.

Once you have fixed these, please click the little envelope below my name and let me know.
Which way do you want to go? Up or Down?

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Astator
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