Exploring... Other Things (Kellan)

[Fenilen]

58th of Spring, 506 AV

He was going to see Kellan. His heart skipped a beat at the sheer thought of the name, which instantly invited thoughts of the face. He closed his eyes, thinking of the way his cheekbones tapered into his nose, the way his red lips pursed together, the way his green eyes focused so intently on whatever it is he was looking at. A small sigh left the lips of Fenilen Ruin. Ever since he had met the man, he had had this yearning feeling for him, one that had only intensified with time. He didn't know what it was. He knew it was *allowed* in society, it even had a word, Zuvis. It was a Zuvis, when a man liked a man or a woman liked a woman. It was perfectly normal... but he didn't think *he* would turn out to be like that. Before he had met the man, he had been content with his life, content living it out in his ignorant bliss, but no, now he had come along, come along and put these thoughts, this obsession into his head. He remembered the day they had met in vivid details, in perfect color.

He remembered the fourteen year old Yasi coming to the Hot Shop, not a week before he was to be assigned his caste. He remembered Yidah remarking on how he had no particular talents for the craft, but she had claimed him anyway, reminding him that they needed someone to spin the pipe while they worked. That was back before Yidah had become consumed with anger for no real reason. That was back before she had beat him for his failure. A pair of fingers drifted to his face, dancing along the tender, but not bruised, flesh of his eye, the finally healed skin of his eyebrow. How he had met someone like him near someone like her, he would never know. Either way, he recalled how he had worked with the Yasi for his entire ten day Bendi, alternating turns on the pipe as Yidah attempted to show them the various techniques and subtleties of glassworking. Fenilen remembered watching his every movement, his every little twist and turn, his every bend... Fenilen sighed as he envisioned Kellan bending over the pipe, shaping the glass, his spine showing throw the taut muscles of his back, his bryda clinging to the curve of his hips...

When Fenilen opened his eyes again, freeing himself from his day-dreaming, he was positioned in front of his mirror, a straight-edged razor in his hand, a thin cream of soap covering his right cheek. Right, he had been shaving. He had to have every aspect of his appearance perfect for Kellan. Perfect. Hormones surged through him, distracting him ever so slightly as he ran the edge of his razor along his flesh, slicing the hair where it sprouted from the skin. Once more, his tongue danced over his lips, and two more stroke found his cheek clean. A quick fling threw the fuzz and the soap on the blade into the basin beneath him, and then he cleaned the blade in it, humming ever so quietly. He folded the razor shut, placing it next to the water basin, which he carried to the door with him. A quick shove pushed the wooden portal open, letting him into the hallway, where he tossed the soapy, fuzz-filled water out one of the portals, returning the wooden bowl to it's pedestal. Then, he exited, closing the door behind him with a quick and hurried tug. He had to make it to Kellan! He couldn't keep him waiting!

Feet that were just as quick, if not quicker, than the tug with which he had closed his door carried his lanky body through the snaking hallways of the Darniva Commonrooms, into the main room. His gaze shot upwards, soaking in the sight. He watched the people climb up and down the spiraling, endless staircases. He watched the people turn down into corridors not too unlike the one he had just gone down. He watched people lose themselves in the hall-- most likely Dek. Now, time to make his way to Kellan's room. Fenilen began his ascent of the winding staircases, each step bringing him higher and higher, bringing him closer to the sky. Two floors above his own room. One... Fenilen continued walking up the steps, breaking into a slight jog, eager to see the handsome man, eager to see his eyes. Fenilen made it to the second floor above his. Now, third corridor. One, two, three... There it was! Fenilen smiled, shooting down the corridor, until he came to the door he recognized as Kellan's. It was already propped open, with Kellan lurking around inside, no doubt.

Fenilen spent a moment composing himself, taking a few deep breaths. Just thinking about Kellan gave him butterflies in his stomach. Now, being on the edge of his room, Fenilen's butterflies intensified, freeing themselves from his stomach and spreading throughout the entirety of his body. His heart fluttered, his hands, his entire arms shaking. Deep, calming breaths came through his lips, remaining in his lungs until he pushed them out, his eyes shut tight. Calm. That was what he needed to be if he was to have any chance. So, without a second thought, he came around the corner, rapping his knuckles on the heavy wooden door, his head tilted thoughtfully as he studied Kellan, studied him doing whatever he was doing. A silent lick of his lips was in order before he spoke.

“Uh, erm, hi.” he managed to choke out, rubbing the back of his neck. His stomach fluttered and his knees wavered slightly as he looked at the beautiful man. Why did he find him so enamoring? Hormones raged through his body, consuming him, controlling his every though and movement. “You, uh, wanted to talk to me about something?” He shuffled his feet as he spoke, looking up at Kellan helplessly, wondering if he could even tell that he was acting oddly.

[Kellan Lucia]

Kellan could not help but worry about Fenilen. It would have been a lie for him to say he had not heard about his incident at the hot shop. Fenilen was such a... fragile guy, much like Kellan's twin brother Toran was. That was most likely why Kellan felt so protective of Fenilen. He saw his brother in him. Strangely, Fenilen was older than Kellan. It did not do much to the fact he wanted to protect him though. Growing up with a more... passive twin brother had made Kellan a protector of the underdogs so to speak. He paced around his room with Toran watching him quietly. "You are figity today Kelly." Kellan glared at his brother and tossed a stone at him. "Shut up you little shit. I told you not to call me Kelly." The stone hit Toran on the shoulder and in moments he was crying. "For the love of the Gods, he is crying." Kellan walked over his brother and put a hand on his shoulder. "I'm sorry bro. I shouldn't have thrown that stone at you." Toran sniffled and slapped Kellan across the face. "You should be sorry you asshole! You treat me like eagle droppings! I don't know why I even try to be nice to you!" He started bawling again. "For the love of Zulrav I am sorry. What do you want from me you little cry baby?" Toran sat down on his bed, pulled his knees up to his face, and started to cry harder. Kellan truely felt bad but he had a hard time of showing it. He sat down next to Toran and patted his back. "Really, I'm sorry." Toran shoved Kellan's hand off of his back and pushed him off the bed. "GET OFF MY BED YOU STUPID PRICK!" Kellan tumbled to ground and landed square on his arm. "OWW! Toran, I am going to throw you off the edge of Mount Skyinarta!" He got up and right as he was going to attempt to pick Toran up there was a knock at the door. "Thank the Gods you little pansy. I was this close from throwing you off the edge of the Aeries." Toran stuck his tounge out at Kellan and sniffled. "Blow it out your ass Kellan." Kellan glared at his brother and walked to the door. He and he brother were too much alike. "Who is it... Oh! Hey Fen! How are you?" He smiled at Fenilen and he closed the door behind him. The red mark from his brother's firm slap was still bright on his cheek. "You don't want to go in there. Toran is having a hissy fit. I swear, that boy is a strange one. How he is my twin brother, I will never know." Kellan motioned for Fenilen to follow and the two headed down the tunnels. "Are you okay? You seem a little flushed." He studied his friend carefully and then shook his head. "Anyway, I just wanted to make sure you were okay after what happened at the shop. What happened in there. Are you okay?" He placed his hand on Fenilen's shoulder and looked into his eyes. "It's okay, you can trust me, we are friends." He worried about Fenilen. He hoped by talking to him some of the pressure of what happened would be released. Whatever happened that is...