Fall 60, 512
The sound of swordplay met Kuvarakh's ears as he approached the door to Alchemmia Alchae. As if it was not bad enough that he had been forced to dodge ghostly blades swung by mischievous spirits on the way TO work. He did not know whether those blades would actually hurt him, but he did not feel intrepid enough to stand and test the question.
NOW, blades that he knew WOULD hurt him were in action within his workplace. Wanda must be in there and he was not about to stand by and let her be injured, or worse. He threw the door open and charged in, inspiring in his courageous recklessness, pitiful in his lack of training, comical in his amusingly swift dispatch at the hands of a competently wielded shield to the face.
"Kuvarakh! Oh my good gods, are you alright?" Wanda cried, her voice less than entirely sympathetic. "Are you crazy? What's the matter with you? I told you Sir Vendrik was bringing a sample in."
Kuvarakh took a moment to focus the several images of Wanda circling his field of vision into one before answering. Were he not a Nuit, he would surely be bleeding from his now crooked nose. "Excuse ME. I had a host of ghostly swordsman prickling my backside the whole trip here and I wasn't thinking clearly." He stood and faced Sir Vendrik "And let me thank YOU, sir, for slamming my brain back into proper alignment. Now perhaps you can reset my nose as well."
"Oh, for goodness sake, let me" Wanda scolded as she placed her palms on either side of Kuvarakh's nose, wrenching them slightly as she went on, her narrative punctuated by the sound of muffled crunching and gasps of pain. "I TOLD you he was bringing in a sword and shield with odd properties that he wanted duplicated." she said impatiently, nodding towards the man who, reason dictated, MUST be Sir Vendrik. "This sword is literally unable to strike this shield directly. I have swung it a number of times and it either shears a glancing blow or the haft turns in my hands to hit with the flat of the blade. The man who owned them said it was an alchemist who gave the shield this property. So Sir Vendrik brought it here, hoping I could figure it out."
Sir Vendrik now stepped forward, his expression telling of a slim tolerance for unprofessionalism, being strained by Kuvarakh's buffoonery. "Yes. I thought it preferable to allow her access to a demonstrative display of the desired effect, as opposed to an attempt to describe with words, especially given the...obvious inexperience...of the one most likely to be relaying that account." his gaze fixed ungenerously on Kuvarakh as he completed his statement.
Wanda stifled a snicker as Kuvarakh turned to face Sir Vendrik directly from less than a foot's distance. "I pray thee, sir, if my woeful lack of military bearing doth give thee offense, I beg thy sufferance to consider that I did but give greatest contribution to that most venerable of services by sparing it the indignity of my presence. And if this act of sacrifice on my part falls short of giving thee satisfaction, I can only hope that I may ingratiate myself anew by inviting thee to enjoy intercourse with thy most august self." he bowed low before the man, who stared incredulously at the display of utter insolence. Then he burst out laughing.
"Well Said, sir! Well said and well met. if you can craft an alchemical formula as well as you craft an insult, then the mystery is as good as solved! We'll call it even then? I best you in melee and you best me in wit."
"Would that my words were fists." Kuvarakh crooned with a smile and a nod.
Sir Vendrik saluted smartly as Wanda slipped up beside Kuvarakh, kissing her fingertips and touching them lightly to Kuvarakh's nose. "My Hero."