Completed [Broken Casket] The Ballad of Petch All {Orion}

[Hadyn Skellig]

20th of Fall
513 AV
Late Evening

The food on her plate sat untouched, slowly getting colder by the tick. The woman stared at the table, the grain rough and gouged by seasons of use and wear. She sat alone ignoring the joviality occurring nearby. Not her regular haunt but she could certainly enjoy herself in a place like this. These folk were her type and the ale flowed freely. It was a welcomed reprieve from constant work and fatigue. A fiddler and two other musicians kept the small crowd entertained playing endlessly. It was soothing, the constant hum of voices, footsteps and general cacophony. Silence was not her desired companion of late.

She was dressed for the forge yet her clothing was uncommonly clean of soot. The long grey jacket concealed any indication of her condition though she remained transparent of the fact she was with child. Dark hair was loose, her energy too drained to attempt anything more than a twisting of the thick locks behind her shoulder. Despite the untouched food the woman's expression was one of placid amusement. The Casket was a place to be merry, not down trodden and she could hardly pretend to be unhappy in such an atmosphere.

She harbored no concern whether or not he'd show. If he didn't she'd simply enjoy the place and eventually eat the food cooling on her plate. The mug of ale was equally untouched. The brunette adjusted her position so her back was against the table, legs crossed as she sat on the bench, closing her eyes as the musicians took up another tune. The candlelight reflected on the smiles and drunken expressions of happiness. These were her people and for this moment she was content. One elbow rested on the table, her head leaned against her hand as she grinned. There was no concern, no worry on her face, brown eyes beacons of warmth, skin glowing. She canted her head graciously as the fiddler winked at her, the smile on her lips gentle though genuine.

Against all rational thought, for but a moment, Hadyn hoped he wouldn't come.

[Orion Michaels]

It was always a surprise when he received a note from Hadyn. It wasn't that he was opposed to her contacting him, that was whatever. It was just that there was always something big to talk about when she did. It made sense that she'd have to contact him in this manner; she wasn't allowed in the dorms. Yet still...

The former physican had by no means attempted to contact her since the last time they spoke, since the last time she'd contacted him. Since the time she told them about her . . . their child. It was still strange to think about. It had been a stupid, stupid, but quite fun drunken night, and now they were saddled with the repercussions of that evening for as long as they lived.

Although she said she expected nothing of me...

That was the most troubling part of the matter, by far. She'd gotten a hold of him, told him about the babe, and that was it. No expectations of him, not even a request for money. She'd 'just thought it right' to tell him. Between the appearance of his daughter, Emily, and that, it had ended up being nearly too much for him to take, though he'd put every effort to put on a good show in front of the mother of their unborn child.

Just shy of a third a season had passed between then and today, and just like the previous time he'd been met at the dorms by a courier and a quickly penned letter, asking him to meet at the Broken Casket. He'd found that..peculiar, but he'd meet here there none the less. He'd told her he wouldn't let her do it alone, after all, even if he'd done nothing to this point to put action behind those seemingly empty words.

With another long day of training behind him, Orion would take his leave of the dormitories, dressed cleanly but plain. Simple black pants and shoes with a white shirt, all free of stain or blemish. His hair was short as normal, and a thin beard covered his face, trimmed and neat. Perhaps a little overdressed for the Broken Casket, now that he thought of it.

He hadn't been to the place before, but he'd passed it several times on patrols, so it wasn't terribly difficult to get to the location. He'd come in, get a drink, talk on whatever it was she wanted, and be on his way. Simple enough, even though the heavy feeling on his heart seemed go give him a very different feeling.

Stepping into the unfamiliar room, Orion stopped just inside the entrance and scanned the room. The thing about this place, the thing that had the knights watching it rather closely, was the large number of foreigners who called the tavern their drinking grounds. With its proximity to the docks it brought in sailors and laborers alike. It made it rather easy to pick out Hadyn among the rabble.

"Picking a neutral ground?" Orion was grinning as he walked up to her, looking down at her and her untouched food. "No appetite, either? Gods, don't tell me it's triplets." He could never be serious, could he? Not that it was anything that wasn't expected of Orion Michaels.

[Hadyn Skellig]

Hadyn opened one eye to see a nicely dressed Orion Michaels speaking somewhat disdainfully to her, despite the smile on his lips. Ignoring the urge to roll her eyes dramatically in response she instead scooted to the side so he might sit if he was so inclined. Opening both eyes now she gave him the once over before returning her gaze to the musicians. It was disturbingly pleasant to see him again, an agreeable feeling settling in her chest when he jested at her expense. She offered a one shoulder shrug before speaking.

"I take no responsibility for the number of brats y'put in me," she quipped mirroring his tone. Though the words were biting she turned to look sidelong at him, a slight smile on her lips. This was not the place for dramatics or angst.

"You're welcome to the plate," she indicated to the food with a nod of her head. "Y'look like you could use some meat on those bones. Are Knights starvin' you into submission?"

Orion Michaels could easily be the most inappropriate person with his humor but she wasn't far behind. Admittedly their last interaction was tense and fraught with anxiety. No need to make this one the same. Shifting her position so both elbows rested on the table surface, the brunette averted her gaze from the handsome Squire. His good looks and charming tongue got them both into enough trouble as it was.

"How you been, Orion?"

[Orion Michaels]

Orion readily accepted the seat next to her, motioning for a drink soon after. It was somewhat nice to see her again, considering all the circumstances. It felt like there were very few moments that weren't some sort of extreme between them. Heated and passionate, peaceful and serene. Nothing moderate for Orion and Hadyn. Perhaps they'd be able to change such a thing. "That makes two of us," he retorted playfully, giving a soft nudge to the woman at his side. She'd displayed an ability to keep up with his banter, and he'd hoped the pregnancy wouldn't drain this from her. Thus far he'd seen nothing to indicate anything but.

The squire wasn't going to argue with the offer of food. He'd missed evening meal time from training and was more than starving at this point. "Don't mind if I do," Orion said, sliding the plate over in front of him, quickly taking a bite of the lukewarm food. This caused him to pause momentarily, not due to the food itself, but that it had been so cold and untouched. He knew very little about pregnancies, it not being his area of medical expertise. She really wasn't hungry, and he wondered if it was due to the condition, or what she'd brought him here to talk about.

"How have I been, huh?" Orion choked down a bite, reaching to take his ale from the server as they passed by. "It's been pretty horrid. Unrelenting training, a daughter who has the filthiest mouth I've ever heard, and every night a bed three sizes too small for me. Well, maybe it's not that bad." Orion looked at Hadyn from over the rim of his mug, pondering momentarily how to proceed. It was..unlike her to make small talk. They've been mostly upfront with one another, at least in his opinion, at least he thought so. There was no need to change things now, was there?

"You don't have to do this, Hadyn. What did you need? I know it's a bit blunt, and if you really do just want a night out to relax, I'm more than happy to oblige, but . . . with the lack of drink and no food in your stomach, I can only imagine there's something on your mind. So..talk to me." He gave her a soft smile, hopefully reassuring. It felt completely wrong. Orion didn't do these things. This...this was the exception. Perhaps the knights had bred in him some sort of honor, some sort of duty.

Or maybe that was just the lie he told himself so he could sleep at night.

[Hadyn Skellig]

Hadyn listened without looking at him, her foot tapping gently to the established beat. She hadn't honestly expected him to be so... affectionate. Closed off, grumpy and cynical - sure. But it was a welcome reprieve from his usual antics. She canted her head in acknowledgement when he explained how things had fared for him since they last saw each other. She sympathized with his sudden burden. Part of her wanted to snort at the thought of his daughter being a hellion but she kept her expression neutral.

He called her out.

She wasn't known for her idle chitchat and even less for beating around the bush. Yet here she was, inquiring after his well being and whatnot. Must be the pregnancy. Turning to look at him, she waited until he finished eyes watching his face. He was so handsome. And so seemingly kind. It was so easy to fall into those eyes. But she didn't want to. Not again.

"Both," she replied at length, dropping her eyes to the space between them on the bench. "I would love to have a night to relax. But... I do need to speak to you. And you know me - responsible to the grave."

The brunette rolled her eyes to indicate self teasing before looking at him again.

"I have been avoidin' seekin' you out," she admitted with a modicum of guilt. "You have enough to deal with. But I'm startin' to show," she pulled one side of the jacket open so he could see. Truthfully there wasn't much to see but the form fitting tunic displayed the slightest of bump if he was looking close enough. "An' I wanted to talk to you."

Hadyn sighed and turned so she could face him better, the distraction of music and chaos far from her mind. Staring at him it was clear she'd have to just out and say what she had to say, whether or not he ended the evening by storming out or laughing himself to death.

"Accordin' to a more informed friend I'll be poppin' this little one out in winter. An' I wanted to know where you're at with all this. Remember y'don't have to stay... with... me" it was visible how uncomfortable those words were for her but she continued on, brow furrowed. "But I just wanted to know. So I can plan. If I'm alone."

She bit her lower lip, all attention on his face. Gods, she hated this whole vulnerable bull shyke. But it had to be done. It was necessary to know where he stood, even if it wasn't with her. She ran a hand through the loose bun, a habit of anxiety though she doubted he would notice. She didn't want him to think she was plying for his emotions or his attention. But it would hurt regardless if he were to turn away. She wanted to explain to him that her emotions were all over the place. But she shut her mouth and waited for him to speak, brown eyes struggling to remain placid.

[Orion Michaels]

She was uncomfortable as she could be. It wasn't his intention at all. She'd invited him after all, and he wanted to resolve things just as she did. But the thing was, he didn't know how to answer her. He didn't know what he was supposed to do. His hands were full with Emily. His hands were full with Dinah. He barely had a moment to himself these days, and now that he did, he was spending that time with a woman wanting to have an answer on how much of a father he wanted to be?

He remained silent as he thought, as he contemplated his options. Orion stared deeply into his drink, as though to beckon forth an answer to his problems, though looking to booze for answers had put him in this predicament in the first place.

"Hadyn..I.." He hated it. He hated this feeling of hopelessness. He couldn't win, neither of them really could. He couldn't commit to a life that would let him truly be there for her, for the child, not without giving up the life he was forging for himself, and both of them knew he was far too selfish a man for that. He wasn't going to lay down the sword, but could he really just walk away?

"I told you . . . I told you I wouldn't just ignore this." Orion sighed, looking down at her, no, their child. "I don't know what I'm doing, but I can't promise to be there for you, but I...I can make sure that you, or the child, rather, is taken care of, as I doubt you'll accept a coin from me if it were any other case." Nerves began to jump as his eyes darted around nervously. Gods, this was stupid. It was like she was trying to guilt him into staying. The resolve he'd shown last season was crumbling before his eyes.

"I'm the worst person in the world to depend on. Kind of ironic i'd be looking to be a knight, huh?" Orion downed the mug before him and called for another one. He'd need something to settle himself if they were going to get anywhere. "I could be gone for weeks, seasons, maybe even a year. Or more? I don't know. I just don't know." Blue eyes couldn't look over at the brunette, instead focusing on a knot in the wooden table. He couldn't find the words, he couldn't find the answer. He didn't know what he would do, what he could do.

"I can't let you do it alone. I just can't. I owe it to . . . it . . . just like I owe it to Emily. I'm hardly the model of fathership..fatherness...fatherhood? I have no petching idea." His voice was uneven, fluctuating in pitch and volume as he struggled to keep his emotions in check. It was clearly a losing battle. Orion Michaels, struggling between who he was and committing to another human being in any way. A miracle had happened that he'd kept one child. Putting him in a situation where he'd have to deal with another? It was a second miracle he'd not disappeared out the door.

[Hadyn Skellig]

She could do nothing but stare while he tried to explain things. It was evident he wanted to be anywhere but in that bar with her. And it hurt. Gods, it was more painfully awkward than she was prepared to handle. She waited until he finished, chewing on her lower lip, eyes lidded with guilt. Orion didn't deserve this.

Once he concluded they sat in silence, both horribly uncomfortable. Hadyn took a breath as his second drink arrived, suddenly feeling uncomfortable amidst the merriment around them. Why'd she chosen this place again? Oh right. The booze. It was more for Orion's sake than hers. He'd looked inconsolably nervous in the smithy, unable to stand without fidgeting. At least here he could drink and send her away when he was tired of speaking.

"Orion, I don't want to take anythin' from you," she murmured, still incapable of looking him in the eye. Proud headstrong Hadyn was now a coward. It turned her insides and burned her skull. But she couldn't let him go on like this, all anguished and despairing. "I didn't ask y'here to torture you. I'm truly sorry."

She hung her head, a frown on her full lips. They were stuck between a rock and a hard place. If she was being honest she'd asked him to come out because she wanted to know if anything had changed. It was harder to hear he didn't know. At least if he committed to one decision or another they could move forward. But he seemed just as unsure as she. But at least he could physically flee the problem if it proved too taxing.

It was good of him to come. She couldn't fault him for trying. They were painfully similar in their inability to cope with emotions beyond humor, lust and anger. Neither were well equipped to put labels on the feelings despite being forced into a situation that required honest open discussion. Surely there was a god or two laughing somewhere at this unfortunate pairing.

"I need a bit of fresh air," she announced suddenly, standing stiffly. It was too hot in here. It was too crowded. A flush of red washed across her neck remembering that she invited him to the Casket. Looking at his seated form she offered an apologetic smile. "I'm a bit unpredictable of late. Y'want to join me? I'm sure you can bring your drink, long as you return it."

Without waiting she started for the door, anticipating the night air with some excitement. Hadyn wasn't sure if it was the environment or the topic of discussion that set her stomach ill but she felt nauseous. Just the thought of Orion's torment made her feel intolerably wretched. She almost wanted him to be mean. To yell at her and lose his temper. At least that way they could both mask their true emotions and pretend they were only there to take verbal hits at each other.

Pushing the door open the woman sighed. It felt wonderful. Stepping out into the darkness she moved away from the door, the flickering light of the lit sconce on the wall casting her in golden hues. She glanced expectantly at the door wondering if the Squire decided to join her or if he was wallowing in his misery at the bar. She couldn't hardly blame him.

[Orion Michaels]

"Did you expect a straight answer from me?" Orion muttered, though it was hard to tell whether he was talking to her or himself. He rarely had any idea what he wanted; everything for the past several years had been spur of the moment and impulsive. It was how he had Emily. It was how he was a cook. It was how he was a doctor. It was how he and Hadyn had arrived in the situation they were in. Yes, it took two to tango, but Orion knew the affect he had on people. Men naturally hated him. Women, well, they eventually hated him, too, but not before they'd had some fun. He knew the precautions he needed to take, but that night, they'd gotten some top shelf drink, and drink they had. He was stupid. Perhaps she was, too.

"Don't want to take anything from me?" His voice rose sharply, though still contained as he attempted to minimize the chance of creating a scene. His heart was racing, his mouth was dry, and all of the fear he'd usually have exhibited when initially confronted was barely suppressed in their second meeting. He'd readily agree with her request that they take it outdoors. At least they could discuss their drama without the prying ears of sailors and vagabonds. He did not, however, agree with her idea that removing the drink was fine. Or even if he had, he had no intention of carrying the mug about with him. Another container emptied of the cheap alcohol, another way to ignore the problems.

He wasn't far behind Hadyn, irritation nearly ready to boil. He wasn't mad at her. She'd done nothing wrong but fall to prey to him, and even with that, he was sure she knew what she'd gotten herself into. Neither of them could have imagined the outcome. Still, it left Orion angry at himself, and as he was known to do, he'd begin to lash out at other people, knowing fully well it's unfair for them to be the target of his wrath. 

"You're no more unpredictable than I am, Hadyn. There's no sense in getting fired up, because I'm going to get mean and explode like you've seen." He'd come far enough that it could recognize his faults, and even slow them, but for a moment. "What do you want? What. Do. You. Want?" He'd hardly gotten out of the door before he started into her. "If it's money, I'll provide it somehow. I'll support you if you can't work during the pregnancy, too. I'll not abandon you, but with me involved..." Orion trailed off for a moment, thinking carefully on his next words. It almost made him sick. The realization of what he was going to say, no, the truth behind it. 

"Hadyn, with me involved in any direct manner . . . how could there ever be a happy family for the child? It's not fair for the kid, no matter what choice I make. For us, I don't give a petch. We're adults, we made our decision. But for the kid..." He couldn't look at her. He just couldn't. The hurt in her eyes was too much, and he doubted his were looking any better. It wasn't that wasn't willing to look after the newborn, it's that he couldn't. He couldn't even manage Emily. Was it better to leave them without him as their father, or to give them a half, a quarter, a sliver of a wannabe father figure? Did any kid really deserve having to deal with Orion Michaels as their dad?

[Hadyn Skellig]

Sylir's bones, she'd pissed him off. Again. The agitation in his voice and his gait was nearly palpable as he joined her outside, hardly waiting for the door to close before giving her whatfor. His words, however, were deeply mired in emotion. Outwardly he appeared displeased, angry. But the statements he treated her with were fraught with unhappiness and self loathing. It nearly caught her off guard but he didn't rouse her sympathy so easily. Not yet.

"Orion, I'm not interested in your dramatics." Hadyn's tone was sharp, brown eyes not given to soften lightly as she watched him in the subtle glow. "I don't need your money. If you want to petch off, then go 'head. But seems like you're lookin' to hang around. And that's fine. Honorable - whatever y'want to call it. If you do plan to stick it out I don't want you goin' on like this. With me involved how could there be a happy family," she mimicked his tone with a touch of cynicism, crossing her arms over her chest. "You're the child's father, Orion. As long as y'don't make a royal ass of yourself I'm sure he'll be quite happy to be yours."

Hadyn watched him carefully, inhaling before speaking again. She didn't care how biting her words were.

"You're right on one score. We are adults. Y'need to start behavin' like one. I realize you've got enough shyke on your plate that a happy future seems far off. But y'aren't going at it alone, however much y'might like to pretend you are. You have me. I will help you. No one is askin' you to do this all one your lonesome. This baby doesn't know you and won't judge you on your past. You'll be new and wonderful an' the light in it's eye," he voice dropped, tone quieting indicating the sincerity of her words. "You an' I don't need Cheva's mark to make this work for our child. So get off your tragic hero horse and make a decision so I can move on with my life. Are you going to turn tail and leave? Or are you going to be this child's father?"

[Orion Michaels]

"Don't you fucking take that tone with me, Hadyn," he snapped, balling his hands into fists. He was getting more and more agitated as the conversation went on. She'd told him about this child some shy of two seasons into the pregnancy and now she was trying to force him to make a call? Was everything he'd offered not enough? And that she'd mock him? It was too much to handle.

He was delusional in thinking that he'd been clear with his speech, his words and thoughts mixing, leaving him unsure of what he'd articulated and what had simply remained deep in his mind. "It is it so much better that a child have a father who's scarcely around compared to one who never gave the illusion that he might be? I really don't know the answer to that. You tell me, since you seem to know everything." His words were bitter. Venomous. Orion had started down the path he took each time he got fired up, each time he was challenged in a way he wasn't ready to face. He'd get defensive, he'd get offensive, and he'd become far from agreeable.

"I'm not gonna play family, here. It's not what I want. It's not gonna work out because you know I'll find a way to sabotage it. And when I do, that kid's heart is gonna be broken, and neither of us want that. But I don't know what you want. You want me to make the call on this kids future alone?" Turning away from Hadyn, the squire stared at the ground, simply seething in anger. He shouldn't be yelling at her. While he disagreed entirely with how it had gone, neither of them were exactly in the best state to deal with it. Backed into a corner, however, he'd come out swinging. "I've offered my monetary support. Some semblance of physical support. And turn tail..?"

Orion turned slowly, letting his gaze fall back on Hadyn. "Petch off." He almost laughed as he spoke, an incredulous expression painting his face. "I'm not gonna play hubby, I'll barely be a father, I'm sure. But this kid won't be left wanting for anything, same as Emily. But petch you." He took a step towards the pregnant woman, then another, and another, passing her as he spoke. "Tell a guy at the last minute, force him to make a snap decision, trap him?" He scoffed, glancing back over his shoulder as he continued down the path. He'd had enough of the woman for the evening. "I'll look you up soon, see how the kid's doing. Whatever."

His chuckled echoed throughout the corridor as he walked away, a nervous pep in his step. In the most noncommittal, unclear way he could, he'd managed some semblance of a commitment, if it could be deciphered. He knew one thing for sure, he'd have to train harder than ever before. Once he was knighted, the children would be taken care of for the rest of their lives. What exactly was going to happen with Hadyn?

"I've got no petching idea. No petching idea at all.."