WHAT free upgrades?

[Kuvarakh]

40th of Fall, 513

The man entered the shop muttering. If his words could be deciphered, it would be obvious he was anticipating a lack of cooperation and was spoiling for an argument. Kuvarakh sighed heavily as Wanda stopped heading in the direction of the front counter and gave him a silent thumb-based directive to man the counter himself.

"Yes sir, what can we do for you?" he began cheerfully.

"You can quit trying to cheat me." the man growled, as though he'd already caught Kuvarakh in a bold-faced lie. "These stones did not maintain their color for even one year, let alone the TEN you promised."

"Sir, I assure you, that no promise would be igno-..." Kuvarakh tried to say.

"ASSURE'?" the man snarled. "What's the difference between an 'assurance' and a 'promise'? If you've reneged on one, why should I believe the other? I came in here three seasons ago..." he gave a sourly sarcastic look as he clarified, "That would be last winter, when we had icebergs in the stree-..."

Kuvarakh tried to keep the annoyance from his face against the suggestion that he wasn't smart enough to know the order of the seasons. "I am well aware of what seaso-..."

"DON'T INTERRUPT ME, You slippery...pocket-lining...sneaky little thief. Like I said before you interrupted me, I came in here last winter and paid full price to have my landscaping stones colored white. They were supposed to last ten years, but they didn't even last one!"

Kuvarakh waited while the man glared at him. Almost a full chime passed before the man demanded, "Well? What have you got to say for yourself? Are you going to make good on your promise?"

Kuvarakh leaned both elbows on the table, steepling his hands before him. "Well, I just wanted to extend you the 'courtesy'..." he made a grimace with this last word and allowed a hint of sarcasm to color it. "...of being sure you were done insulting me before I answered."

The man stammered in fury, "How DARE you twist what I said like that. Why, I oughtta-..."

Kuvarakh slammed both fists on the counter, rattling a vase at the far end. "And how dare YOU try to twist the integrity of our promises that way! Who do you think DID the activation of those stones, sir?" he snapped. "And where do you get off being indignant over an interruption when you had already interrupted ME TWICE!"

Kuvarakh knew perfectly what this "full price" had been that this man had paid. It had been the lowest price, because Kuvarakh had been fairly inexperienced at the time. This business about the effects of the activation lasting ten years would have required Wanda doing the job, and would have cost three times as much, still a bargain for ten times the half-life duration. "Now, it is clearly stated in our manifesto that longer duration of an alchemical effect-..."

"Don't try to trick me with your fancy words, you bastard, That bitch that tricked me into thisz...zzz...zzzzz" The man's arm still pointed toward where Wanda was scribbling in something at her desk in the back. But Kuvarakh heard nothing the man said after the word "bitch". Every sound blended into a low hum and a tint of red dropped over his vision.

[Kuvarakh]

There was surge of humming and his name being called in increasingly alarmed tones, and Kuvarakh found himself gripping the man by his collar, having pulled him off his feet and halfway across the counter when the red cleared and the humming waned.

Wanda was tugging ineffectually on his arm, as was the customer, who was also squealing in fear. "LET HIM GO, Ku! PLEASE STOP!...KU! MYRI'S BALLS! LET GO THIS INSTANT!" Kuvarakh nearly collapsed as the similarity shattered his focus. The sudden release of the man's weight back-lashed to send him stumbling back, wide-eyed shock turned to Wanda.

"...Raellen..." he gasped, memories crushing him in a collage of longing and heartbreak. It might just as well have been the ghost of his long-dead wife crying those words. Kuvarakh had long been nursing a belief that Wanda was the reborn spirit of his wife, Raellen. There were so many ways in which the woman was an exact copy of his wife's beliefs, sensibilities, preferences and mannerisms.

During the incident involving the Field of Dreams, his convictions had finally been revealed. And he'd found that Wanda herself, rather than being repelled by the thought of a walking corpse being a husband to her from a past life, felt her own odd sense of some mystic connection. But now there was a sense of time ticking away on their life.

Wanda was opposed to making the transformation to Nuit. But Kuvarakh, due to a long chain of bizarre coincidences, felt the gods had guided him here just to find her and realize who she was. He felt the gods must wish for them to be together. And if she would not become a Nuit, then he must kill himself when she died. If the gods truly smiled on their union, then they needed to walk to Lhex together so their rebirth could be contrived to result in a future joining.

But in the meantime, the thought of some obstinate old curmudgeon calling his past wife a bitch was not to be tolerated, or acquitted without punishment. He stewed in fury as the background noises tried to intrude on his brooding. The sounds being comprised of the man's shrill cries for justice and protection, in sniveling counterpoint to Wanda's demands that an apology for his insults WOULD be forthcoming before any thought of compensation would be entertained.

Kuvrakh sagged in adoration. This too, was just like her. Scolding Kuvarakh for his behavior, and then stepping in and taking it over without missing a beat.

He smiled...Gods, how he loved her!

[Kuvarakh]

The man left and Wanda came back to bring Kuvarakh up to date. "I don't suppose you remember adding color to Mr. Barnett's landscaping stones last Fall, but he claims that he was promised a ten-year duration on the effect. I know it's a crock, I would never have made such a promise with you doing the transmutation back then, but..."


"But the customer is always right..." Kuvarakh groused with an angry sigh. "Even when he's scamming to get free activations." He turned to Wanda. "Look, I know it was MY idea to advance half-life durations to "preferred" customers...or those who pay the extra charge...But I don't remember either case being pertinent where HE is concerned. He never paid the kicker, and he's certainly not on our list of A-1 customers."

Wanda was already nodding patiently. "I know, I know, but it's good public relations to do favors like this sometimes. AS much of a loudmouth as he IS, Mr. Barnett will definitely advertise us."

Kuvarakh was already nodding as well, but not patiently. "Yeah, by going around gloating to everyone how he tricked or forced us into giving him something for nothing. All that's going to come of doing HIM a favor is we'll get a bunch of other jerks in here whining about how we cheated them too. And how they're going to badmouth us all over town if we don't "do right" by them."

Wanda snorted, "Let them! Barnett was a hurry-up job, and I never had him sign the quote, so I can't really deny him. Everyone else is bound by signatures on their agreed contracts. Every merchant has to deal with people trying to claim "breach of promise". No one is going to exploit us for giving a new activation on Mr. Barnett's rocks. And we're not that busy anyway." She gave him a blatantly teasing pout "Do it...for me? Sweetie?"

She patted his cheek, gracing him with her biggest, saddest eyes. Kuvarakh tried to stay mad, but it was a lost cause. "That's not fair, you vixen." They both grinned, "you know I can never say 'No' to those beautiful blue eyes."

Her sad face was as phony as it was deliberate. "I know...and I feel just terrible!" She straightened up, back to business. "Tomorrow is fine. He'll be bringing them in a cart. That was myone demand, and his one concession. Do the waterproofing on the cloth first, but then anytime after that will be more than soon enough for that cranky old turd."

Kuvarakh stopped in mid step. How like his old wife to surprise him with a sudden crudity like that. AND it gave him an idea...

[Kuvarakh]

Several laborers brought a cartload of stones to the shop the next day. The old man railed at them to hurry up, that he wanted his stones done right away and didn't want to give these crooks any excuse not to get to them.

Kuvarakh snapped back, "Aaaah...you mean we crooks that are giving you a free advance of half life on your rocks on the basis that we never promised you any such thing and are just trying to shut your whining long enough for you to realize that there's no other alchemy shop in town to take them to? Not that they'd want -..."

"KUVARAKH!" Wanda shouted from inside the shop, "Just get it done."

The old bastard grinned maliciously. Kuvarakh picked a shred of dead skin from where he'd scraped his hand earlier and flicked it at him. The man recoiled visibly, as though in fear of "catching" Nuit.

Kuvarakh looked at the rocks and his eyes widened in anger. "Wait just a Vayt Cursed minute, these rocks are still all muddy! I'm not going to waste bells washing these damned things off! I've got other customers too, not just belligerent, dried up old -..." the clanging of a bucket hitting the walkway beside him interrupted his prepared insult and brought a second malicious grin to the old man's face.

He turned, almost disbelieving, to find Wanda, hands on hips, toes tapping, with a look of taxed patience boring into him. "I've had just about enough of you...BOTH of you!" The old man's sneer faded into a scowl. The laborers chuckled and ignored the subsequent scowls directed their way.

'All right, you soul-dead old bastard. I'll fix your petching rocks for you. Give you a nice long half life to enjoy. Ohh yeah...' Kuvarakh stewed to himself as he started filling the bucket with water and washing the hundred rocks. At least they were smooth.

It actually annoyed him that it hadn't taken that long to do them. He was still perturbed at Wanda. 'How could she side with that insulting old coot like that? He's insulting her as much as me!' He went back into the shop to inform her that the rocks were washed. He began voicing his protests about being embarrassed, by her, in front of "that old prick" when he was only defending the reputation of her shop.

His complaint began to lose steam in the face of her unexpected grin. "I'm well aware of what a poor diplomat that old fart would make, and I'm not worried in the least about anyone taking his word about anything." Kuvarakh's eyes narrowed as he sensed that he should wait for her to continue.

"I have always found you quite capable of coming up with creative ideas when properly motivated." she coaxed, "And I think a bit of reciprocal belligerency is in order here. I want to teach that cankerous old bastard a lesson, so I thought if I compounded his antagonism a bit, you might just get mad enough to come up with something really sweet...or better yet, sour. I mean, I'm obviously far too kindly and delicate to come up with such a plan." her lilting sarcasm was a thing of beauty.

Mischief lit behind his eyes, "Well I don't know about sweet, or sour, but how about something really "stinky"? Would that be too unkindly and indelicate?" It was now Wanda's eyes that narrowed as she waited for him to continue.

[Kuvarakh]

Wanda set to work on some simple glyphs to apply to a stone, that would be used as one of the chargers in the upcoming transmutation. Kuvarakh wanted to watch, to get some rudimentary knowledge of Glyphing, but Wanda's craft still defied him. He saw the circles enclosing various images, but did not connect what she etched with anything he was certain to be related to the desired effects. There were slanted lines behind the circles, smaller circles within them. These, then, in chain-like arrays, sometimes touching, sometimes with small gaps, but the gaps then filled with lines or double headed arrows connecting the circles.

She, naturally, did not like having him hover over her shoulder, and set him to gathering the smoothed, washed stones into the center of the big new Alchemy ring she's picked up after the disaster with the mutated termites. He went to the storeroom to get one of the bricks that had been imbued with a fine, translucent, pearly white color. It was, in fact, exactly that. During some of their stocking up procedures in the past, they applied color to various textured items. These bricks had been imbued with the lovely white color of a genuine pearl. This would be passed on to the old grouch's landscaping stones.

They had cloths and leather, metal, rubber and wood, even some feathers and papers that had been colored as well. It served to have multiple textures in order to have a color charger comprised of a substance nearest to the desired end result, since the least amount of sheer change affected during a transmutation brought about a longer duration.

When he got the other items together, Wanda brought out the glyphed stone. The mischievous grin on her face mirrored his own. He saw now the added wavy lines on the etched design. He could hardly repress a chuckle, "So let me get this straight...Our "special bonus property" will not take effect right away?"

"Nope, not until it rains a sufficient amount to trigger it. So he won't be aware of it until then. By then he'll have long since re-landscaped them. Then, there will be no removing it. The rain would literally have to erode the stone to break the glyph effect. Half-life duration will occur long before that." She looked over the preparations with satisfaction.

Then she frowned slightly. "You realize we will need some that is old and dry as well, don't you? To use as a filter. We only want the smell, not the texture and structure."

Kuvarkh held his hand up confidently. "It's covered, oh my Queen of Retribution, found it yesterday, after we agreed on this course. Now I just need to find a nice fresh sample. I assumed you didn't want me storing it here overnight."

Wanda made a face and nodded. She gave him a wave of dismissal and Kuvarakh left to go to where the citizens of Alvadas most frequently walked their dogs to 'do their duties'.

[Kuvarakh]

Kuvarakh collected what he needed, the dog's owner unaware as he walked off whistling. Kuvarakh scooped it into a bag he'd made from a bit of the cloth he'd created to keep on tab at The Tattered Thread. It was alchemically treated to absorb extraordinary amounts of odors. It was exactly what he needed to bring in a load of canine droppings.

He went back to a different corner of the same pet area and found an old, largely dried-up specimen of the same "material" and returned to the shop, where Wanda greeted him with a plugged nose. She had put everything in position and waved a flourish for him to proceed. He dumped the two samples where they belonged. The fresh, smelly one into the remaining charger, alongside the pearl-colored brick and the glyphed stone, and the drier, far less odorous one in the filter.

It was a fairly simple transmutation, Kuvarakh's subconscious, visually metaphorical approach generating his usual mental image of a whirlpool. The spin of the maelstrom aligned mentally to the spinning djed stream. He was able to easily detect the bands of visualized flotsam and jetsam which represented djed properties that he wanted discarded.

Often, chargers and filters possessed enough different properties that it was not always so simple to differentiate between the representative aspects of them in the pictured water surface. But here, the filter was completely active. He wanted not only the color gone, the brown removed to retain only the white of the colored brick, but the texture, a swirl of water with a muddy thickness to it, and consistency as well.

With the mentally pictured rejection of a foamy, light wake of froth, there remained only the consistent, deep, dense swirl of a pure water funnel. All there still was denoting any odd qualities were a white, pearly translucence and the appearance of trails of fingertip-sized runnels of wake forming symbols that spun with the speed of the rest of the whirlpool image.

It had gone quickly and easily. He backed away from the ring, calling to Wanda that he was done. She came through, opening windows and fanning some large pieces of cloth to remove the lingering barnyard aroma.

Kuvarakh looked appreciatively at the pile of smooth round landscaping stones, all uniformly cast a lovely, pearly white. "So how long do the glyphs determine it will be before the smell kicks in?" he asked.

Wanda turned to him with a glint in her eye. "Not time, Kuvie dear, rain! I can't say exactly when it will happen, but as soon as two cups worth of rainwater hit any one stone, the lovely gift of fragrance will reward that kindly old fellow for his gregarious congeniality." She sniffed a last few times, satisfied that no trace of the awaiting stench was currently detectable. She then sent for the carters to load and deliver the newly treated landscaping stones to their owner.

[Tapestry]

XP Award!

Kuvarakh:

XP Award:

• +1 Alchemy
• +3 Rhetoric
• +2 Negotiation
• +2 Observation

Lore:

• Glyphing: Delayed stench through Alchemy

Comments :

Interesting bit, here. I rather liked the interaction between you and Wanda. If you feel I missed anything, let me know.

TAPESTRY