Flashback [Thunder Bay] Trying to Forget

[Syveris]

41st of Summer, 513 AV

The heat had become unbearable, and Syveris was not the only Inarta that had decided to go to Thunder Bay for the day, seeking to run from the heated insides of the mountain. She had walked slowly down the road that let to the settlement, though, focusing more on her own thoughts than on her footsteps. Arin hadn't searched for her. Actually, she hadn't heard nor seen him since before the... incident in the Inclement Weather, and she was a little hurt by it, even thought she had promised herself she would try to forget him. The Avora was right. Arin didn't care for her any more than he cared for anyone else.

Which was strange, because even this knowledge didn't make her think that she wasn't his friend. She was, and she knew that. At least, she had been before she confronted him. Syveris supposed the Inarta was just different. Special in his own way.

Sighing, she ran her fingers through the feather she had placed on her hair. It was a small falcon feather, a present from Arin on her last birthday, and an object she still held dearly. Syveris knew that, if she wanted to forget him, she would need to get rid of this gift, but for some reason, she still treasured it too much to just throw it away.

Deciding to think of it later, when it was really needed, Syveris searched for something to do on Thunder Bay. She could always browse a little for something interesting in the market, but she wasn't willing to spend any money right then, and most important, she wasn't feeling like shopping. With a sigh, she tried to think on the locations she knew on Thunder Bay. They weren't many, as she spent most of the time on Wind Reach.

A group of chattering Inartans passed, and Syveris caught some words about going to swim. Interested, she decided to follow them, and see if it was a place she could enjoy. The Avora wasn't very good at swimming, so if it was dangerous or too deep, she would have to search for something else to do. It wouldn't hurt to try, though.

She followed the group, until she saw a cove, with incredible clear water. Curious, she approached the shore, watching as a gentle flow make its way down the boulders. The water was cold, a welcomed change from the heat of Summer. The pool was deep in some parts, too deep for her to be comfortable on, but there were also more superficial places where she could enjoy the fresh water, and maybe just stay there until the heat had subdued. It sounded like a good plan, to her.

x Abstract

[Syveris]

Syveris took her bryda and vinati off, rolling them together into a ball and searching for a place where she could shove them. Finding a rock that was loose, she put her clothes under it, before untying the feather off her hair, carefully, and placing it inside the clothes. Neither were expensive nor uncommon, but there were always people willing to steal things only for the trouble it would cause others, and the thought of loosing the feather was... Well, she would just hide it, for precaution.

Placing her foot on the water, she felt a shiver run through her body. It was cold, although not too much, and fresh, a more than welcomed feeling to beat the heat of the day. Smiling to herself, she slowly walked until a point where she could still reach the ground, and sat down, enjoying as the water flowed around her.

The movement, including the one caused by people diving and swimming around her, was incredible soothing, and Syveris felt herself relaxing more with each passing chime. The cheerful laughs and happy talking also helped to improve her mood, and she found that, soon, she had completely forgotten about every bad thing, or at least, she had shoved them deep inside her mind.

Syveris laid down, and tried to float. The first few times, she had to get up again, afraid that the water would get into her nose. After a while though, she moved to a more empty place, slightly away from the others, and managed to float for time enough for her to relax even more. Closing her eyes, Syveris let her mind wander, thinking about everything, and then nothing. It was a nice feeling, the sun heating her belly and the water cooling her back.

Then, the memory of the day of her birthday, when she had received the feather, came sneaking between the others unimportant thoughts, and she allowed herself to think about it. The memory was nice, and it didn't bring her pain, even though more recent events did.

It had been her birthday, on the Fall after the Djed storm, and Syveris had celebrated it on the first half with her mentor, just sitting in the Enclave and talking about unimportant things. However, Arin had arrived, and Virat was quickly to leave. The Avora wondered, now, if her mentor had already noticed her feelings for the boy or if he just knew she would like to spend some time with her... friend, too. Was she even already in love with Arin then? Syveris didn't think so, but she couldn't be sure. The boy was weird, and he had always brought up weird feeling in her too.

Nevertheless, what Arin had done next surprised her. The boy never offered any gifts to anyone, not that she had ever seen it, and when she had tried to give him a small glass paperweight for his birthday, he had been so annoyed and refused it so vehemently that Syveris never tried to do it again. Nor she expected any present from him.

But he had given her something. A small falcon feather, that he said wasn't a birthday present, and that he had gotten from the floor of the Aviary. It wasn't exceptionally pretty, and it certainly didn't have any special feelings attached to it, but still, it moved her. It was a present from the last person she expected to give her something, and it was from someone who was special to her.

The rest of the day was spent talking about everything, and in the end they went once again to the Kitchens, to ruin some other food Arin had managed to get. It was almost like a ritual, their trips to the Kitchens, but Syveris hated the act of cooking still. It wasn't for her. And yet, she went, because of the company.

And the feather represented everything, for her. Their entire friendship could be symbolized by the feather. Seemingly dull, but with many emotions attached to it. At least, it had been like this for her.

x Abstract

[Syveris]

A sudden and loud splash made Syveris open her eyes in surprise, and fumble to sit. Water had entered in her nose, and she coughed, sneezing at the uncomfortable feeling, trying to get the liquid out. She shot a angry glance at the pair who had stepped in the water. The man had strawberry blond hair and blue eyes that were way too annoying for her liking, and the girl was a dark haired woman, also small, with golden eyes that seemed to be mocking her. Actually, her whole body posture seemed to be mocking her.

"Watch out where you sleep, kid." the woman said, smugly, and her male friend laughed, as if it had been funny. Syveris growled to herself, but didn't dare to speak up. She couldn't tell if the pair was Endal or not, but, to be taunting someone they didn't even knew, they probably were. The last thing the Avora wanted that day was trouble, so she just cursed the pair under her breath, watching as they began to swim, quickly forgetting her.

She watched for a while, with nothing else much better to do, specially after her thoughts had been so rudely interrupted. For a chime, she wondered if she could mimic the movements the people were doing, and maybe try swimming a bit. Sending a look at the ground, Syveris saw that there was an area deep enough for her to swim, but that she would still be able to reach if she needed to stand. Besides, there were a lot of people around, and if she felt like she would drown, then she could always cry for help.

She walked a few steps, before submerging in the water, wetting all the dry spots that might have been left. While she was still underwater, she opened her eyes, staring at her hair flowing around her, a little amused. To have water all around her was almost as fun as feeling the wind. Syveris wouldn't exchange the Edge of the World for this cove, but it wasn't like she had to choose.

Going back to the surface, Syveris looked once again to the swimmers around her, and tried to copy what they were doing. She submerged again, and moved her arms, weirdly, around her, pushing the water out of the way. The Avora was moving, but slowly, and she took made a few circles around a small area before she pushed herself up to her feet, pouting at the water, trying to imagine if it was supposed to feel that weird. Probably not. Taking a deep breath, she tried again. She would not give up so soon, after all.

x Abstract

[Syveris]

Her next attempt was soon interrupted by a indignant scream, and Syveris fumbled once again, surprised, however this time she managed not to get any water in her mouth or nose. Standing up, and looking for the source of the scream, she saw the couple that interrupted her standing nearby, facing each other. The man had his arms crossed, and the look on their faces suggested annoyance. Syveris looked away, not willing to listen to a fight, but it was quite hard to ignore it, since the woman was screaming.

"What do you mean by that?" the scream was too high pitched, and Syveris found herself wincing. Couldn't they be more discreet? "I thought I had said for you to stay away from her!" the man's answer was inaudible, and perhaps he was trying to calm the other down. It wasn't very effective. "I don't care how many Inarta you sleep with! I just told you to stay away from her! Not her!"

"You can't tell me what to do! It was one night! Stop being such a chick!" the man screamed this time, seeming to have lost patience. Syveris sighed. She had heard enough. Her and all the Inarta on the cove, who were now looking at the two of them with interest. Standing up, the Avora prepared to get out of the water, gather her clothes and leave, but a slapping sound made her stop, and look back at the couple.

The man's face was red with anger, and he took the woman's wrist, strongly, bringing his face closer to hers and whispering something. Syveris could see her pale, and try to get away. Well, that really was enough for her. Moving as fast as she could without slipping, she grabbed the woman's arm and freed her from his grasp, dragging her away towards the place where she had placed her clothes. She sent an apologetic look over her shoulder.

"I'm sorry to interrupt, but I think you should both have this talk at a more... private place." there were some Inartans who sighed, seeming disappointed, but the man blushed, although Syveris couldn't say if it was from embarrassment or anger, and walked away, stepping strongly on the ground.

"Th... Thank you." the girl mumbled, and Syveris noticed she was shaking. Without a word, the Avora gathered her clothes, dressed up, and began to walk back to the Thunder Bay entrance, adjusting the feather on her wet hair. However, the other followed her. "He... He is Endal, you know. I'm just a Chiet. When he took interest on me, I thought I would finally be happy. He had chosen me, and he promised me he loved me." the words were getting out shaky and weak, and Syveris felt uneasy. There was no reason the woman would be telling her all her personal stuff, and, to tell the truth, the Avora didn't care. She had her own heart problems to take care of. But the woman didn't stop talking.

"I thought I was special to him! Of course, he had many others, but I could have been special, right? Why am I not special?" the woman was clearly distracted, but it wasn't any of her business. However, when she mentioned the special part, Syveris halted, and couldn't help but feel sorry for the other.

The Chiet was probably feeling exactly how she was, right now. Syveris had also thought herself to be special to someone, and the disappointment was big. "Look..." she was whispering, and the Avora turned to the other, looking in her eyes. "I know what it feels like to be wrong about this, but really, I'm the worst person to give romantic advice, and..."

"You don't need to!" the woman interrupted, clenching on her arms and looking with begging eyes to her. "Just hear me out! I know you are a stranger, but... But you helped me! And I need to talk."

Need to talk. Great. Syveris sighed, and then shrugged. The Chiet smiled, and dragged her to the side of the path, making her sit down.

x Abstract

[Syveris]

It took at least two bells for the woman to finish her story. She talked about everything, every single moment he had taken her hand on his and how she felt about it. Syveris, on the beginning, wondered why she was giving so much detail for a complete stranger. But, after the first time she tried to offer a word of comfort, and the woman simply kept talking without even noticing it, the Avora understood. She was like a wall, some object that could listen to the other speak. An object to comfort, not someone who could actually help.

It didn't offend her. Most of the time, she spent musing over her own thoughts, comparing her feelings to the woman's. Just like her, she had felt special because of some attention or another that had been dedicated to her. She found out the woman was suffering very much like her, although it was clear that they dealt with it very differently. To love and have dreams of perfection, only to have it end abruptly by seeing - or knowing about - the man they loved being with someone else. However, there was a key difference between them: Syveris hadn't been able to live that dream.

"I... I think I will go and apologize." the Avora looked at the Chiet, eyes wide. She had been complaining about the betrayal, and now was thinking about getting back? What was the logic on it? "Don't look at me that way... I love him." she whispered, as if feeling guilty.

"More than you love yourself?" her tone was bitter, but Syveris didn't care. When the woman looked at her, confused, the Avora elaborated. "You will go back, but are you sure you won't suffer again? Can you stand his ways?"

"I love him." was the only answer.

Syveris thought for a while, watching the sky. Was love really that? To give one's heart without care if it would be broken? She looked at the Chiet, pitying her. She wasn't strong enough to let go, even if she knew she would be hurt again. The Avora's hands clenched into fists, and she remembered the feather on her hair. She hadn't let go, either. She clung to the memories like the woman was clinging to the physical form. They were the same, in the end.

Slowly, Syveris reached for the feather and untied it from her hair. She looked at the object, running a finger on it. A precious memory that she would have to let go if she wanted to move on. And she needed to. She wanted to.

"Take this." she put the feather on the woman's hand, the words coming out in a whisper. "To a reminder for you to be strong." and to free me was what she thought but didn't add.

The woman protested, but Syveris only shook her head, not trusting herself to talk. It was a precious memory that she was giving away, not only an object, and she was afraid of going back if given the chance.

"Just take it and go. Do what you think it's best."

The woman thanked her, but she didn't care. Her eyes were focusing on the ground, her mind racing. It took a lot of effort not to get up and go after the woman, to claim her memory back. But she didn't. After half a bell, Syveris got up, slowly, and walked towards Wind Reach, feeling lonely, but lighter. She would move on.

x Abstract

[Skerry]

Grades

Syveris

Skill	XP
Observation	4XP
Persuasion	1XP
Rhetoric	1XP
Swimming	2XP

LORES :

• Swimming: The Breast stroke
• Swimming: Breathing techniques
• Persuasion: Convincing another to let go of the past

Notes:
An interesting exploration of Syveris’s feelings. Her unwillingness to let go is well described, well done!

Remember if you have any questions or problems with your grade then feel free to PM me.