(Flashback) Better Left Unseen (Yggdrasil)

[Blythe]

80 Spring, 505 AV

Blythe's heart felt rather heavy, it had only been a few days since her love, her heart, her pride and joy, her baby girl, Fawn, had been ripped out of her very arms, and sent to reside elsewhere, in what she hoped to be Avalis' care.

Images of Fawn were constantly flooding her mind, no matter how much she tried to block it all out, to forget, they always managed to seep their way in. Blythe kept getting flashes of Fawn in her mind's eye- her icy blue eyes, her toothless grin, the way spit always seemed to be trickling out of the side of her mouth, the way she always grabbed onto Blythe's finger when she held it out to her... it all stung, piercing Blythe's heart over and over again, throwing her deeper and deeper into the dark pit known as despair.

It was positively immobilizing, an it felt like Blythe was suffocating in a sea of self-pity, pain, and sorrow. For, not only did losing her child emotionally destroy Blythe, but so did not knowing why. So did not having the answers she so desperately wanted. Why had Fawn died? Why was she brought onto this earth only to perish a few days later? To bring so much joy and so much despair in a matter of a few days? And, perhaps most of all, would Blythe ever successfully give birth, and have children like her sisters? Would she ever start a family of her own?

Blythe hated not knowing, but she also knew, that if she wanted to, she could drink deep, and hopefully find the answers she was looking for. So, it was for this reason that she woke up early, got dressed, strapped her bag to her back and headed for the Silver Lake; for she knew that if anything or anyone could ever explain her devastation to her, it was the magical waters found in the lake. It was Avalis' own tears as she wept in happiness at Laviku's gift to her, a sign of his undying love and affection for her.

The lake was located in the center of the Island, and at Blythe's rather slow, and unhurried pace, it took her about an hour to get there from her family's over-sized, and generally stuffed cottage.

The lake itself was filled with fresh water, a thin hazy-grey fog, gliding over it like a mist. When Blythe first caught sight of it, she was amazed at how tranquil it all seemed.

Being called to it like a moth to a flame, Blythe approached it, walking closer and closer through the mist, and getting her first good look at the water. It was as clear as a crystal, and clearly reflected its surroundings on its surface. The occasional fish or bird, who floated upon it, the only thing that disturbed its calm, and relatively flat surface, sending a series of ripples through it with their subtle movements.

Blythe was mesmerized as she crept closer, until she reached the edge of the lake, unstrapping her bag from the shoulder and placing on the ground to her right. Slowly, Blythe came to her knees and looked into the pool at her own reflection. She looked like she hadn't slept or eaten well in days, which was true, she hadn't. Her skin seemed paler than usual, as did her lips, and her eyes had lost their lustrous quality. She looked positively dreadful in comparison to her earlier days.

Blythe sighed, wondering how she could have let herself come this far, how she could have allowed this to happen when a small fish of about 5 cm, with flowing fins in shades of jewel tones- deep purples and sapphire blues, as well as a deep emerald green, swam across the water directly in front of her. The fish was positively breathtaking, and Blythe soon found her breath catching in her throat. It was amazing to her that such a small creature could be so beautiful, that such a beautiful place could exist, and right here in Mura, only a short distance from her home.

Blythe looked into the pool of water, running her right hand through it. "Show me what I wish to see..." she whispered to the water, as though it had ears before she got as comfortable as one possibly could when resting on their knees, and bent forward, bringing her face down and closer to the water. Her face was only a few inches from its surface.

Blythe cupped her hands and brought them together, before dipping them into the water, and splashing some water in her face. It felt cool and refreshing. Blythe smiled, for what she was certain was the first time in days. She closed her eyes, breathing deeply, in threw the nose, out through the mouth. She was more than ready for whatever the water had in store for her, she thought, as she cupped her hands and held them together again, before dipping them back into the lake, and before lifting them and bringing the vision water to her mouth; scooping as much water into her mouth as she could, as some of it seeped through the spaces of her fingertips.

Blythe sighed and sat back up. The water trickling down her throat and into her stomach. It felt so very cool, she thought, as she sat back and waited for whatever it had in store for her to begin.

[Yggdrasil]

A young Konti, appearing to be in her teens or maybe twenties approached Blythe through the dense mist which surrounded the Silver Lake. The young woman was tall, lanky and in general strangely graceful; she appeared to float over the ground, her hair gently moving with the slight breeze. She wore a white dress underneath a thick black coat to protect her from the cool breeze. Her feet and legs were bare, save the dress that stopped just below her knees. The young girl had a strange Ethereal feel about her, her movements, her appearance, everything had this strange warm glow to it. She was like a warm fire on a cool fall evening, the light to guide you in the darkness. But, she was just a child? The Konti reached Blythe, standing a few feet from the heart broken woman, the strange Konti’s pale ice blue eyes stared off across the lake. She stood there silent for a moment, watching the fog. One could imagine what the girl was thinking, perhaps about her lessons? Her family? A boy she had meet? She could have been thinking about anything, but the somber expression made it clear that whatever she happened to be dwelling on was painful and close to the Konti's heart. “I am sorry for your loss, Blythe.” The young woman said quietly, her words seemed sincere as her hands clasped behind her back. Another long silence followed as the young woman moved towards the water slowly, kneeling next to Blythe. The strange girls hands moved to rest on top of her knees, her eyes moving to look at Blythe. “It’s strange how calming it is here; you can feel Her presence, can’t you?” Whether this woman meant Fawn or Avalis was not clear, perhaps her intent was to cause such confusion. “I lost my Mother as well, a few days ago.” The girl seemed to mumble, her eyes moving back to the crystal clear water. “I can’t imagine what you’re going through.” Her voice remained solemn, her eyes remaining on the water. “It will all be alright though,” The girl said with a small smile, her voice was strangely reassuring, she sounded confident in her words, as if she knew things Blythe did not.

[Blythe]

Blythe looked up from where she was kneeling at the side of the lake to find a young Konti woman approaching her. She looked to be about half of Blythe's age, and was both tall and lanky. The mysterious woman seemed to Blythe, to have materialized out of the mist that surrounded the Silver Lake. She seemed to be floating above the ground. Was she some sort of spirit? A hallucination or delusion? Blythe wondered, as she looked upon the woman in complete awe, her eyes a little wider than was typical for her, her mouth slightly open, exposing her two, milky white front teeth.

The woman was wearing a long white dress, much like Blythe's own, and a black coat over it, her feet were bare. Her skin was rather pale, her eyes an icy blue, that almost seemed to mirror those of her lost daughter. It was like Blythe was looking into her daughter's eyes again. She wondered if Fawn would have grown up to look something like the ethereal, feminine beauty that now stood before her.

When the woman had reached her, she stopped to look out across the lake, she was silent for a moment, before she whispered, “I am sorry for your loss, Blythe.” Blythe looked up at her, "thank you," Blythe stuttered, not knowing what else to say, and wondering how this strange woman had known her name. Blythe was pretty sure she had never met her before. However, Blythe proved to be incapable of mustering the courage necessary to pose her question.

Another long silence followed as the mysterious woman glided towards the water slowly, bending down and kneeling next to Blythe. Blythe watched the girl calmly, her lavender eyes never leaving the site of her pale face, the way her blonde hair fluttered about her face in the breeze. The woman had moved her hands so that they were resting on top of her knees, her icy blue eyes looking up and into Blythe's lavender-colored ones.

“It’s strange how calming it is here; you can feel Her presence, can’t you?” Blythe tilted her head to the side, unsure of who the woman had been referring to. Was it her daughter, Avalis, or someone else entirely? Someone else she may have been forgetting?

“I lost my Mother as well, a few days ago,” the girl mumbled, as she shifted her gaze back over to the water. “I can’t imagine what you’re going through.” The woman's voice was solemn, her eyes remaining fixated on the Silver Lake. Tears welled up in Blythe's eyes. How did this woman seem to know all of these things? And why was she saying all of this to her? she wondered.

“It will all be alright though,” the girl said with a small smile, as though she knew what Blythe had been thinking, the woman's voice was strangely reassuring; and Blythe was uncertain as to why this was. How could anyone be absolutely certain, she wondered, as she found the words, "how would you know?" escape her lips. They were uttered in a manner that didn't seem angry, just confused, curious, innocently questioning the things this woman had said to her.

[Yggdrasil]

“How would you know?” Blythe asked the strange new comer. Her words were not filled with venom nor did she see upset by what the young girl had said, she simply seemed curious and perhaps confused on what the girl meant. The confusion was expected, the young Konti intended to answer the question, but could not help from simply turning and smiling softly at Blythe. “She has told me so,” Ice blue eyes flicked to the lake for a moment before returning to the elder Konti. “She has told me a great many things about you, Blythe. She has told me of Fawn, she has told me of your pain.” Slender, pale fingers dipped into the clear water, slowly moving in a strange swirling pattern. “She knows you will accomplish a great many things, you write, and your writings will touch many.” The girl spoke calmly, her words were strange coming from such a young Konti, the way she spoke sounded more like an Elder or at least a mother. “Fawn is safe, she is happy. Avalis and Laviku are with her, they have, and always will love and care for her.” Her eyes seemed mixed with a slight sadness. “Fawn will always love you, and a part of her will always be with you. Hold her memory close, but do not drown in it, use it to grow, learn, experience life.” The young woman smirked rather suddenly, taking her dry hand and pushed loose strands of hair behind her ear. “My mother was beautiful, she loved me more than I could ever imagine. I understand how hard it is to be away from Fawn, I am sure it is hard for her as well.” The Konti shifted on her knees, moving so her weight was no longer resting on her heels, but so her rump was on the shore, her feet sticking out slightly to her side. “I am sure you are wondering who I am or why I am talking to you,” Small fingers moved out of the water to rest back on her knee. Icey eyes moved to look at Blythe, a small smile across her face. “I’m here to answer your questions, but more than that, I am here to reassure you, I am here to help you heal. Avalis does not wish to see any of her children in pain, she sent me to help you.”

[Blythe]

"She?" Blythe whispered into the wind, as she stared into the woman's icy blue eyes. Who was this mysterious 'She' that this woman kept referring to? Blythe wondered, as she looked up at the figure that stood before her, complete confusion filling her eyes. Was it her mother? A god or goddess? Avalis herself, or someone else entirely?

“Who has told you all of these things about me?” Blythe asked. "And were they good or bad things? Were they said in order to give me a bad name, or to raise it? Or were this woman's words neutral?" Slender, pale fingers dipped into the clear water, slowly moving in a strange swirling pattern. The woman's movements were fluid, graceful, mesmerizing, and Blythe couldn't help but follow them, and the ripples that trickled through the water's surface, the woman's hands their source.

A few small blue fish, with wide fins, and tails two times the size of their body swam away, as if afraid of the woman; the disturbance in the water. Blythe watched them go.

“And how could she know so much about me?" Blythe asked. "When I am not even sure I have met her..." Blythe's voice trailed off, swirling around with the mist that surrounded the lake. She still had no idea as to who the woman was referring to, and it unnerved her somewhat. How could a single person know so much about someone? Blythe wondered. Especially when they had never met, and were not even family?

The girl spoke calmly, and in a way the woman's words seemed to whirl around Blythe, covering her in a calm and protective blanket. Blythe smiled shyly, sweetly, as she looked out at the calm waters of the lake. She shifted her position so that she was sitting with her legs stretched out before her, her toes licking the edge of the lake. Her hands were stretched out behind her, supporting her weight.

“I am glad my daughter is safe, and is being looked after by our mother and her love. It brings my heart the slightest bit of peace, even though I miss her dearly,” Blythe said as she glanced up and away from the lake and back at the mysterious woman. The woman's eyes seemed to contain a slight, but fairly well-hidden sorrow. What was this woman saying? Blythe wondered as she stared up at her, teary-eyed. “And I know she will always love me, just as I shall always love her. Even though we only spent a short time together, it cannot be any other way. A mother's love is a mother's love, that bond, between mother and child, can never be broken, no matter what.” Blythe paused for a moment before adding, "but thank you for reminding me. Sometimes it is difficult when your heart feels as though it has been stabbed by thousands of knives, and then burned beneath the scorching sun."

The young woman smirked rather suddenly, taking her dry hand and pushing loose strands of hair behind her ear. “Every mother is beautiful you know. In their own way. Whether it be on the inside, or the outside, or perhaps even both. Although the last sort of person seems rather rare, unfortunately..." Blythe's voice trailed off for a moment. After a few moments she added, "and although you may feel a great deal of pain, as you should, it would never be the same as the pain someone else feels. Everyone feels pain differently. In differing amounts, they cope with it in separate ways. No pain is the same. No one feels the same way as another, even if they are suffering from the same pain. Like two daughters of the same mother. If the mother dies, as all people do eventually, the one who was closer to her in life may grieve far more than the sister who wasn't. Even though they both experienced the same sort of loss."

How could anyone ever understand what it was like to lose a child, unless they had lost one themselves, Blythe wondered, not daring to actually ask this woman. Doing such a thing would be incredibly rude.

The Konti shifted her position uncomfortably before continuing with her speech. “Of course I wonder who you are,” Blythe said as she watched the woman remove her fingers from the lake, and place her hand back on her knee. “And that's probably a good thing, there are so many questions in this world without answers. Perhaps you can provide a few, at least, for some of them.”

After she had finished speaking, Blythe simply nodded, allowing the words this woman spoke to flood her, allowing herself to soak everything in before she spoke. "But who are you? What are you?" Blythe looked up at the other Konti with a confused look in her eyes, the tears she had successfully held back until now making their way down her pale cheeks. They were both cold and sticky, and slid down the side of her face, and onto her chin, before dripping off of the edge onto her neck and shoulders. Blythe didn't bother to wipe them away, it was apparent that there was no use in trying to hide or minimize her emotions; emotions, which this woman seemed to perceive and to read with an unbelievable amount of accuracy. Not only that, but it was no use hiding: this woman seemed to know all about Blythe anyway, as to how this could be however, Blythe may never be positively certain.

[Alice]

OOCSomething simple and short to get us going. Sorry for the long wait!

The Konti smiled. “Avalis knows everything about us. She is our Mother and her gift our guide through the outside world. You should trust Her more”, she then added, as if teasing Blythe. The words weren’t meant to be insulting; rather she simply tried giving some advice.

Then she listened to Blythe’s descriptions. Although she had already stated that she couldn’t begin to feel what Blythe was going through, she nevertheless listened. It would do the girl good to speak of her loss, allow herself to think it through and put up with it. She’d have to get over it and live on, or else she’d become trapped in a past that never came back. No, Blythe shouldn’t do that. There were too many things she was good at, too many beneficial deeds she’d still do for her and for others. Even now, while speaking of it, Blythe already felt that the weight had lightened. She’d probably also realize that the memory of her daughter started to fade a little, as if it had only been a bad dream.

When Blythe spoke of mothers, the other Konti smiled too. She remembered her own mother. Such a beautiful and ethereal being she had been, a seer and, above all, favored by Avalis! Not knowing that she had inherited some of her mother’s grace, she kept the memory close to her heart and sometimes wished she’d be a little more like her. “I wish I would have valued the things she tried to teach me more”, she whispered to herself. Although she didn’t intend to tell Blythe of her own life, she somehow couldn’t help it.

Then questions were directed towards her. The Konti looked up and faced Blythe. A hint of bitterness could be seen in her features. “I was once a Konti”, she said. “Now I am less than a Konti, but probably also more. Like I said, Avalis has sent me. You can ask me anything you want. I will answer as best as I can and not lie or withhold knowledge.” The spread her arms, inviting Blythe to simply trust her, trust her Goddess, and ask away. Blythe needed to talk. Badly.

[Blythe]

Blythe nodded. "It is important to remember and cherish everything you learn, even if it disinterests you and doesn't seem important at the time you first learn of it. Perhaps, some day, the information would come in handy," she commented rather absently. It seemed like the waters were simply trying to dull her emotions, like alcohol. But, they seemed to be failing to answer all of her questions. Half of her questions had been answered with questions, and instead of feeling enlightened, Blythe found herself feeling all the more confused. Everything she did seemed to make her long for more. Everything she said had the same effect. There were never enough answer's for Blythe's questions.

"Well, if you answer nothing else before the pale waters ware off, tell me this: why did she have to die? Why was this considered her time?" Blythe asked. She couldn't use Fawn's name again, it hurt Blythe too much for her to do so. But the woman should know to whom Blythe was referring. Her vision had begun to blur, and Blythe couldn't help but feel as though it would all soon, and she would be left without her answers. But then again, it may have simply been her tears obscuring her vision. Even if she did have more time than she thought, Blythe was convinced she would still be left without the thing her heart needed: a reason.

Why create something, only to have it taken away so quickly? Blythe wondered. Why put something through the pain?

OOCIt is ok... but um... I honestly don't remember we were trying to accomplish in this thread... hopefully you have some ideas >.<

Or we could wrap it up... even though it is so short, 'cuz we already have another thread going, which is only just beginning.

[Alice]

OOCOkay, let's wrap it up. If you want to post once more, go ahead, if not, tell me and I'll award xp in Interrogation or something.

The Konti nodded in agreement and stayed silent for a while. She was watching Blythe, but at the same time she didn’t press her to ask anything. If Blythe had no questions, or rather, couldn’t voice her questions, then that was fine with her too. But she had made clear that it was a chance that wouldn’t come back so easily. Even if a Konti drank vision water regularly, the impact never stayed the same. Once experienced, events couldn’t be repeated.

When Blythe chose to speak up and ask something, the Konti listened carefully. Of course, she immediately knew who the person she spoke about was. There could be nobody else, because nobody else was in her heart right now. The Konti felt that Blythe could only think of Fawn, could still feel her near, although the memories were filled with so much pain that she avoided calling her by name. The Konti had experienced a similar feeling, and although it had happened a while back, she still remembered everything vividly. She had often questioned why Avalis had chosen her to speak to other Konti, especially Blythe, but now she knew it was for the similarities between their lives. She thought about the question carefully, repeated it in her mind like an echo, before she answered. And she had heard Blythe’s thoughts as if they had been spoken aloud, and answered to them as well.

“Sometimes happenings cannot be understood immediately because they hurt so much”, she said slowly, one hand playing with her hair, twirling strands around her fingers. Obviously she was lost in thought, struggling to express what she really wanted to say. “All you can think of is that it’s not fair, that you did nothing to deserve it. You know what I mean. But as time goes by, you will understand that even the act of taking away your daughter had an impact and probably allowed you to grow into a better person. The next time you will receive a child, you will probably be better prepared. More successful. There is nothing that happens without a reason, Blythe. Let that thought give you strength when you’re facing a dead end.” She smiled a little, a smile both happy and bitter at the same time.

And then her figure blurred and she looked about, realizing that the time was running out. “Don’t despair, Blythe”, she said, her voice already sounding distant, “you will experience a new beginning, a second chance, and I’m sure you will do excellent next time. Good luck, Blythe, good luck.” And then she slowly disappeared from sight, leaving white light and a slight breeze behind.

Blythe was alone once again, kneeling at the edge of Silver Lake and looking over its calm surface. Her question had been answered. Now the real question was if that answer had been enough.

[Alice]

Blythe

Experience: 3 Philosophy, 1 Observation, 1 Interrogation
Lores: Questioning Past Happenings, Searching for a Reason, A Messenger of Avalis, Eternal Love of a Mother, Learning for the Future

Comments

Despite its shortness, I enjoyed the thread.