(Flashback) First Glance (Sairque)

by **Chemar Tisserand** on February 3rd, 2011, 7:18 am

Timestamp: 6th Day of Summer, 494 AV

Within the serene comfort of the Dreaming Lady, the guests found calm and solitude, immediately warmed by the glass along the front wall, they walked into a golden glow. It would surround them until they were greeted by their generous host, Rayt Tisserand. On such a day the greeting room glowed its usual calming glow when all of a sudden like a flash of fire burning across the floor, a gangly girl with a shock of red hair darted from behind the desk to dash out the door. As she did, a strapping man with the same flash of red hair stepped out from the hall that led to the dreaming chambers. His voice boomed through the room, even at a whisper. "Chemar..." With one spoken word, the girl screeched to a halt continuing her exodus only when she did so in a controlled walk, her mischievous green eyes looking back over her shoulder.

Once she was out of sight of her father, she spilled out into the street, taking long slow paces at first. With childhood energy busting to get out, she could not keep herself slowed and she once again ran full bore around the front of the shop. After seeking out the perfect spot, and as if her body was suddenly without bones, she folded onto the ground then laid back awkwardly, fishing around in her pockets for some small treasure. She voiced a small 'Aha' and pulled her hand free. As her fingers uncurled, she looked with some wonder at the collection of tear shaped glass beads that filled her palm. They were the color of fire and sun, a mixture of copper, red, gold and yellow. Very carefully, she poured the beads from her hand into her lap, collecting them in a fold of fabric for safety. With the most delicate touch, she began to separate them into colors. When they sat in separate piles in her lap, she grinned and reached into her hair, freeing a small section. With the concentration written all over her face she began to weave the delicate beads into her hair.

by **Sairque** on February 3rd, 2011, 8:08 am

Heel. Toe. Heel. Toe. Heel. Toe. The frail child, red hair still mussed from the previous night's sleep, used this awkward abbreviated gait to travel down the corridor. Perhaps, as a result, little attention was paid to the bustle of productive traffic around her. Perhaps, due to apathy about the surrounding bustle, she focused solely on the thick skin of her heel meeting the delicate toes on each step. Heel. Toe. Heel. Toe. Heel. Toe. The child, an inch or two too short for her age, lacked not only height but appropriate girth as well. Down along the edge of the corridor, neatly travelling between the wall and traffic, the waif rhythmically carried on.

Heel. Toe. Heel. Toe. Heel. Leg. Arm. Hair. Pretty glass beads. Sai jerked up short, blinking out of the mysteriously deep thoughts the neat rhythm of the gait had pulled her into. Instinctively, from much experience with bumping into those that found such intrusions offending, and had the stature to do something about it, Sai took a step back and regarded the girl. She was all kinda gimpy sitting in the hall, directly in the path Sai had found for herself. Brow furrowing, she watched the girl...tangle and mat her hair up. And though Sai was, by no means, concerned at all about hair being neat and pretty, the girl was just mangling whatever beauty she was attempting to add with the colorful baubles. And the girl really really looked like she was trying hard.

"That doesn't look very good," stated with all the tact of a horse's choice in defecation location. And because the girl looked to be about her age, Sai dropped onto her haunches and leaned over to get a closer look at the beads. "Those are pretty. I've never had any glass work."

by **Chemar Tisserand** on February 3rd, 2011, 9:00 am

Chemar first heard the regimented heel toe, heel toe, lifting her eyes to focus on the scrawny soldier that approached. When the girl looked at Chemar on first glimpse with the disdain of being a bump in her path, she halted her attempt at beading and lifted her chin in defiance to watch as the little girl as she crouched in front of her.

When reference was made to her beads, Chemar tried not to flinch, but kept a keen eye on her treasures. Seven year old brows pulled tightly together in offense as the soldier insulted her attempts, spurring her on to press the beads into her nemesis' small hands and challenge her. "If you think it's easy, then you do it." With that, she clumsily spun in a 12 point pivot to present her back to the girl. When she settled, one long limbed arm lifted to smooth what she'd already done, accidentally ending with her fingers tangled in her own hair. She would not look back. She would instead, struggle like a horse caught knee high in a puddle of mud, every movement making her predicament worse. When she sat, with both hands inexplicably cemented in her own hair, she blew a frustrated puff across her forehead.

"This is not working as I had planned." The admission was the closet Chemar would come to asking for help, the ball was now in the court of the little soldier, to save her, or not.

by **Sairque** on February 3rd, 2011, 9:55 am

The small girl sat back on her heels, hands inexplicably full of beadwork and presented with the owner's back. The challenge was working, changing her attitude about being bossed around into something more amenable. Beside that, she got to bring the handfuls of color up to her face and spend long awestruck moments admiring the girl's collection. They would look brilliant suspended like wind chimes out in the summer sun. She wanted to put them in a little pouch and carry them along on her belt, pretending they were Pinions. Or make a real wind chime out of them by tying them to a string and hanging them from something tall. Like a door.

Startled out of their mesmerizing splashes of color by the girl's abrupt semi-frustrated semi-calm declaration, Sai glanced up, lowering her hands. Wha...brows furrowed in confusion, her head tilted to the side as she tried to figure out what exactly the strange little girl was doing.

"What are you doing?" asked as though she thought the girl was stupid. Which she was seriously considering at this point.

And then she had a dilemma. Put the precious little tear drop beads on the ground so she could...untie? the girl? But then they could roll around and get lost or crushed or kicked. And it would be her fault that the girl didn't have her beautiful beads. Eyes darting from her precious cargo to the tangled hands, Sai frowned severely. Dumb girl. Twisting to the side, she very carefully deposited the beads against the wall, caging them in with her hands like they were going to sprout little legs and wings and flee the scene, until they settled down into their little bubble of safety.

By this time, the silly girl had been holding her hands up for quite a while, but Sai knew just how to handle this. When they untangled burrs from hides, sometimes they just cut them out. Out whipped Sai's knife, with all the coordination of a seven year old well accustomed to playing with such toys and with none of the care shown to the beads, and two quick slices accompanied by a thin shearing sound the offending locks floated down and the silly girl's hands released.

"There!" she beamed proudly. "You really should brush your hair more so that doesn't happen."

by **Chemar Tisserand** on February 3rd, 2011, 10:18 am

The vast relief of being able to lower her arms was soon eclipsed by the sight of her red hair lying like pools of blood on either side of her hips. Chemar sat for several moments dumbfounded. What is the world was she thinking! Idiot girl! With slow measured movements, she lifted her hands to press on the side of her head, taking long deep breaths like she had seen her father do so many times when she went swimming in the hot pools or built forts in the massage cubbies. 'Breathe in... breathe out... breathe in...breathe out...' Try as she might, she couldn't look away from the piles of long tangled hair.

"What.Did.You.Do?!" She wanted to growl at the girl when she turned to look at her, but beyond her initial question, she couldn't make another sound. Seeing the face of the girl made Che want to flick the middle of her forehead until she cried. She touched her hair again, her childish anger renewed. Her little girl face pinched into a grimace as she pushed the heels of her hands into her eye sockets. She remained as such until she had a thought. "I've got it. Give me your knife." Her hands dropped to her lap as though they weighed more than she. Looking straight into the stupid little soldier's eyes, she blew out a long breath and lifted her hand, holding it out to receive her weapon. "If I have to look like this.. so do you." Stupid! She added the last without speaking, thinking in that moment how proud her dad would be of her restraint. Her mistake came as she lifted the other hand just once more to feel the damage. It was as though she was possessed, unable to stop her initlal response; fast like and arrow her little hand flew, flicking the soldier smack in the middle of her forehead.THWACK!!! Much to the shock of both of them. Chemar sat looking at the girl, a little red spot now appearing in the middle of her forehead. She sucked her lips into her mouth before speaking in her most pleasant, calming voice...

"Your knife please."

by **Sairque** on February 3rd, 2011, 10:59 am

"What do you mean, 'what did you do'? I fixed your stupid problem. Who gets their own hands stuck in their own hair?!" Sitting on her heels still, Sai stared at the girl and the girl's offended attitude, face scrunched up in distaste and perplexion. And then the girl took forever to move again, sitting there like moss on a rock with her hands pressed into her eyes. So while the girl apparently wrapped her mind around the concept of having her problems solved, Sai tucked her knife back away and scooped up the beads.

Having her own sudden idea, she plucked up a recently severed red lock and started threading the beads together. Lip caught between her teeth in concentration and eyes squinting at the delicate process. Only a few were put on the string before she knotted the end of the strands together and jangled it proudly. Now the fool girl wouldn't lose them and they wouldn't roll away. She set the strand down with the other beads just in time for the girl to find her tongue again. Instead of picking some more up to safe keep from her idiotic companion, Sai looked up expectantly, delicate little features of her face furrowing immediately upon sight of that squished face. Immediately, she changed gears upon the request for her knife. It didn't matter the reason. Eyes narrowed, she perked up out of the relaxed slouch on her heels.

Poised on her toes, the scrawny girl stared flatly. "No, you can't even touch your hair without getting stuck." She was not giving up her knife. She was not giving up her knife to someone who would, without a doubt, kill herself with it. She was not giving her knife up to let the girl-who-would-definitely-hurt-herself put the blade anywhere near her sensitive skin. And then, like the gangly girl was part mongoose, her hand shot out and landed solidly between her eyes with a sharp thwack. Sai jerked away, more shocked than hurt, but growled all the same and launched herself bodily as only a bouncy kid with more energy than mass could do.

The girl, more bone with little cushioning muscle, and even less fat, turned her head to the side and aimed to take the girl square in the chest with the point of her shoulder. Beyond that, there was no plan. There was just fury thick enough to choke her throat and bring stinging water to her eyes. Uncoordinated thrashing and absolute determination to come on out on top, to fight and squirm until the girl acceded to her greater smarts and fighting skill.

by **Chemar Tisserand** on February 3rd, 2011, 5:12 pm

Without even the smallest window of opportunity to argue the merits of her knife handling skills Chemar saw it coming, but in that moment she had no defense against the scrawny little monkey that now launched toward her.

Her eyes went wide, exposing a ring of solid white encircling the vivid green and surprise changed to fear as the boney shoulder of the monkey soldier slammed into her chest. When they propelled backwards onto the ground it was as though a horse stood dead center on her chest, expelling every usable breath of air. As she lay there raggedly trying to pull any air into her body she scarcely had time to try and deflect the whirling arms that flailed about her. She panicked, thinking that the uncalled for mutilation of her hair had not been the worse thing that was going to happen today.. surely she was dying.

Still without breath she raised her arms clumsily against her attacker, trying to stop her in the only way she could think of. With all the strength he braced the heel of her hand against the tiny red spot on the soldier's forehead and pushed with all her might. It did not remove her, but as she straightened her arm she was at least given a small respite from the beatings to her head. For once she was thrilled to have long clumsy arms as there were just that much longer than the monkey's to give her some breathing room...well...if she had been able to breath. This small break gave her time to finally pull a saving breath into her body. It felt like a dam broke and she sucked in the air with a loud woosh. These free moments also offered a chance for the rest of her to react and against every bit of stubbornness and strength she had, she felt it...that humiliating sting of tears. Paired with that she could feel her bottom lip involuntarily jut out. Chemar hated to cry, almost as much as she hated it when Rae kissed and hugged her.

Spurred on by her need to not let this 'stupid monkey' get the best of her, she gave her strongest shove and sent the girl flying off her like a thrown apple. "Get off me! Why are you so mean!?" As soon as she launched the girl from on top of her, she lifted onto her feet and hands, skittering toward the wall like an awkward crab. When her back slammed to safely against the wall she stared at the girl, lip still pouting, and stuttered breaths shaking her little body. "You're the one who made me look like a dummy. " She lifted her hand to pushed her knuckles into her eye, forcing away those stupid tears, and as she did, she saw it. All those beads that had not been strung onto loose hair were now rolling unevenly away from her along the wall. All thoughts of combat and blame dissolved as she jumped forward trying to trap the runaways under her small hands.

"Oh no oh no oh no..!" She looks with pleading, tear filled eyes at her enemy, then back to her beads. "My pa gave them to me." She could barely see the beads through her tears now, but continued to pick them up as they fought to roll away.

by **Sairque** on February 3rd, 2011, 7:22 pm

Victory! The panicked thrashing beneath her was unfocused, defensive, and ineffective. Sai pressed her advantage, striking incessantly in her own uncoordinated manner, little hands not even balled into fists half the time. The writhing figure’s full-body struggles dislodged the little soldier from her sprawl, but the constant shifting and tangles of limbs deterred her not from the blind anger revenge. She scraped and scrabbled and launched after each deflecting thrash. The hand on her face, sliding over skin wet with tears until it firmly settled against her brow, couldn’t be dislodged no matter which way she twisted her head. She was stuck, losing her advantage. And then it pushed against her. Her head snapped back, letting the arm push her noggin away even as she tried to keep the rest of her body within proper range. This awkward bend in her scrawny form, the little scrap twisting with all the flexibility her limber little body could summon, helped not against giant ape arms.

With her waif-like body, easily pushed up by the larger girl, effectively disarmed by the distance, the scrawny soldier turned her focus to trying to break the lock of the arm. Failure! Defeat! Her little chest heaved in sobbing gasps, and the snarl on her face melted into something no more appealing, a rather sticky, contorted expression of shame and pain. The girl’s ugly mug and destroyed hair turned watery and disappeared behind the veil of leaking tears. Even without visual clues, the body beneath her gathered and strengthened. Just like a dumb ape. Only an ape could throw her bodily into the air, a disorienting sensation that left her hitting the ground in a tumble. Propping herself up on her elbows, she furiously dragged the back of her hand over her eyes and glared at the girl.

“You’re the one that knotted your hands in so badly that my only option was cutting it!” But she hiccupped, chest jumping, inexpressible emotion still supplying betraying tears to make new tracks down her ruddy cheeks. My pa gave them to me, Sai had never had a pa, but she had never had anything but the frayed clothes on her back. The little glass treasures were precious and special. Two of them rolled against her scraped knuckles and those blurry yellow eyes dropped to watch as the fingers grabbed them. Then her other hand reached for another set that were dangerously close to the main traffic of big dream-stomping boots. “Why did he give them to you?” she asked, still keeping a wary eye on the physically superior but mentally deficient ape, and pouncing in between people to snatch up the few that they had actually sent flying with their furious scrapping. “Are you supposed to do something with them? Take them to a glass worker? Make a wind chime?” She hated the sound she made when she would abruptly suck in staggered breaths and how her voice was thick and goopy.

Her mind worked in the inexperienced confines of her life. No mother, no father, only a sister. She’d scraped things together that Aidara liked, bits of silk scarf, shiny things, tinkling slag, but had never had the sentiment reciprocated. But that was different, anyway. Never before had either of them received a ‘gift’ from an adult. Grown-ups gave them tools or materials related to their bendi tasks, for the express purposes of those tasks and no other. Even the clothing was utilitarian. Finally, eyes blinking wide in her red and puffy face, she warily entered the ape’s personal space so the precious manifestations of color and light could be carefully transferred from the delicately callused hands cupped protectively around them at her tummy to their owner.

by **Chemar Tisserand** on February 3rd, 2011, 9:45 pm

Chemar was more than shocked when the monkey began helping her gather the beads, but she had little opportunity to try and unravel the mystery of why she did it, lest she lose the rest of her treasures to the careless boots of passing people. Amidst the looking there was much sniffling and wiping of tears but very little speaking until she heard the girl's question. With a puzzled look, she stopped and looked over at the soldier, having no idea how to answer her.

"What do you mean 'why'? She cupped the gathered beads in her hand, holding them as she would have held a tiny bird, with care and delicacy. She sat back, looking wide eyed at the waif of a girl, and then she whispered in a tearful, halted voice. "Because he loves me." She held out her hands to receive the beads, watching them pour from the monkey's hands to her own. Her eyes focused on the beads, taking in the wonder of the colors and the effect of fire that the mixture reminded her of. She was hesitant to look back at the unruly monkey, chewing on her lip, tasting the salt from her tears. In her head, she could hear her father's voice telling her to be thankful for those that help you, her jaw tightened a bit and almost begrudgingly, she spoke to the girl once more "Thank you for helping me."

For several moments after collecting the beads she sat quietly, trying to figure out why the girl had helped her after attacking her, attributing very little import to the flick that began it. In her seven year old head she tried to imagine what her father would do, and finally landed on a solution. With the utmost care she separated out a bead of each color, tucking the rest into her pocket for safe keeping. She didn't ask permission, but her movements were cautious, the breath still burning a little with every inhalation. Locks of her hair lay scattered around them as though a doll had exploded, but she decided not to revisit the subject of that just then, instead, she approached the girl and lifted her hands, carefully separating a long strand of hair into a section of its own. He heart pounded thinking that at any moment the girl would be on top of her again, and every movement she made was accompanied by her own silent wincing. With all the care and attention she had hoped to use in weaving the beads into her own hair, she placed them into the girl's. While the ability on herself had been remedial at best, she had much experience in beautifully caring for Rae's hair, so the beads fell gently in a lovely line when she finished. A graceful trail the followed the line of the girls jaw, adding accent to her brilliant yellow eyes.

When she'd finished, Chemar backed away quickly, still fearing a good pouncing. With her back pressed against the wall she watched the girl, holding her breath for the eventual reaction.

by **Sairque** on February 3rd, 2011, 11:27 pm

Because he loves me.

The beads didn’t seem so impressive, like little bits of color that had been taken from the world and condensed so tightly they had solidified, in the ape’s big, soft hands. They were soft. Sai stared at them. Those big dull, soft hands had defeated her. Made her cry. They were soft because they were loved. Addy’s hands were soft. Addy was loved. No one loved anyone in the whole mountain as much as Sai loved Addy. Though the thoughts zipped along concretely, they were words that belonged to others, to the kind hearted Dek that cared for the twins. Sai didn’t know love, it wasn’t something she could point at within or without herself. She knew that Addy needed to have help with her bendi. To smile, she needed to be given a reason. She needed to be included in the roving posses. But still her mind continued on down this path. Pressed back against the stone wall, having divested herself of any responsibility regarding the glass work, Sai pulled her eyes away from the weak hands and to her own. They were smaller, bony, but they were hard. Because he loves me. Being loved meant being soft and useless. Crying over having a few strands of hair cut off. Sai kicked at the locks beneath her feet. Addy wasn’t useless. Her opinion of her adversary conflicting with her knowledge of her sister brought another scowl to her face.

Mind lost in the puzzles no seven year old mind would ever be able to grasp beyond the black and white, the simple and straightforward, the warbled appreciation faded into the noise of the warren faded into the moments the ape spent in thought afterwards. Sai would never know the balefully ground out attempt at manners, the effort was wasted on the scamp. But the practice wasn’t wasted on the Ape. Sai remained, at the site of her defeat and in the company of a dumb ape, because leaving while her face was still red and puffy would mean explanations. A big soft girl hit me, was not an option. Abruptly, that girl was hovering near her, right off her shoulder and Sai’s pale, narrow face turned up, still scowling. At first, she had thought that the girl had fished her own knife out and was making good, but with one hand curled up, unknowingly holding the beads, and the other sifting through her hair, there was clearly no threat. The fear in the girl’s body wasn’t visible to her and she stood, face furrowed in a wary frown, waiting.

She didn’t want the girl’s beads. But there they clinked when the morally balanced child stepped away. Emotions warred within her again, too many spinning too furiously to be identified, much less by a seven year old. Her face collapsed again, tears leaking from her eyes—the only way so many indistinct feelings could find expression. Well, of course, they all got channeled into something Sai could handle. Anger. There was something wrong. She didn’t understand why the girl did what she did. Nothing with this girl lined up into her simple linear logic. She's so dumb! “You don’t love me,” pointed out in a flat shout, not the cry for love that it could seem. “I’m not soft! I’m not useless!” In a flash, Sai whirling on her companion, confused fury accented by the unwelcome glass works, the knife was in her hand again. “Here’s your stupid payback,” she squeaked, throat closing at an unfortunate moment. The blade flashed and the lock of hair so bravely approached and then artfully decorated separated from its brethren. She threw the hair, light red in her youth, and attached beads at the girl’s chest. She wasn't soft. She wouldn't cry over lost hair. The ape wanted hair back, she could have Sai's. Triumphant, she waited for a few long moments, letting her victory seep into the girl.

She spun away, bumping into a burly man that grunted at the intrusion before she slipped between his legs and got lost in the crowd.