[Aidara's Scrapbook] It's Real For Us

[Aidara]

Epiphanies are so awesome. I know how to start Cailet on her journey. It was so easy. Why am I so stupid? Obviously all she has to do is go to the library -_-

[Naama]

Why you think I made that place? To give you epiphanies.

[Aidara]

Thank you, Pao. Thank you for knowing that I would some day need the Lhavit version of a library

[Aidara]

The End is in Sight So, even though my financial status only meant I could afford one class this semester ( though I am taking 6 in the spring ) I'm glad that this one is almost over. Today was my last day of lab! I'm super excited! A slight weight is off my shoulders now; I haven't been sleeping well the past month or so. I wake up 4-5 times a night... normally, that wouldn't be so bad except... It takes me around 45 minutes to actually fall asleep after I've laid down, shut off the light and close my eyes. I lay there forever just trying to clear my mind or not think about anything. Ive tried making lists, thinking about books, thinkign about Addy and Cailet and all my other PC's.... nothin' helps. So, lab and classes have been stressful because even though I technically go to bed at a time where I would get 7-8 hours of sleep, not only do I NOT get that much, but I wake up exhausted. I have to take a nap almost every day because of it, which then doesn't help my sleeping issue. I think it's also my bed. It's bascially a futon with a slightly better mattress. I had a $3000 mattress back home (that I got for $500 'cause I'm amazing) so I think my body is rebelling, or something. I'm crossing my fingers that the mattress is the issue since it is an easy fix once we get the money. So, that being said I have one final on Wednesday. Monday and tuesday will be filled with studying, so try not to expect or badger me for posts... I'll just make me feel guilty that I can't. Today my plan is to reply for Kaniel, create my solo for Cailet and maybe do a few posts on Aidara... but first I need that nap I was talking about.

[Aidara]

I can't help it I'm on a post-read high. Alright, as the influx of hot mens into my scrapbook may suggest, I have a new obsession, if you will. The Fever Series by Karen Moning. However, I just finished the last book this morning and now I just have to write about it. I won't be giving anything away. At least not intentionally. If you're reading them and don't want anything given away at all, then obviously stop reading here. Lots of people hate Twilight, and I can completely understand why. When I first read the books, it took me four days to complete the series. I was completely enamored by the characters and the world that could be, but isn't reality. After finishing the last book, I immediately picked up the first and started reading all over again. The second read was slower; I noticed things I hadn't before, felt that 'hate' towards certain characters that I had just glossed over the first time. By the end of my second go through of the series, I was miffed. Again, I immediately picked up the first book again and re-read the Twilight series for a third time.... by the end of that read, I was disgusted. How fucked up was the relationship between the characters? Bella loved Edward because he was hot; he was abusive mentally and, though Stephanie Mayers tried to glam him up, creepy as fuck. He loved her because her blood smelled good to him. That is the long and the short of their 'everlasting' 'romantic' relationship. Nothing substantial other than sex and a baby ever developed between them. 16 and Pregnant, anyone? As I was reading through the Fever Series I was sorely tempted to skim over the inner dialog of the main character and get to the sexy sex. I wanted Barrons as badly as Mac did, and like Jen so aptly put it, you just couldn't wait for her to sleep him so you could too... Just being honest here. However, I didn't skip over anything. I read everything and tried to take my time because, there in the background, screaming at me, was Twilight. This mysterious too-good-to-be-true man who isnt-quite-human falls for the 'beautiful but super smart and resourceful' girl, they have a battle of wills, emotions and lies but...Nope, I won't give anything away. Ugh. I hoped and hoped and hoped to the gods that it would surprise me and the relationship would take a twist and I would be satisfied. But no. Instead of a crappy-novice writer flamboyantly sparkling up vampires, I got a pro romance writer giving us the Edward/Bella/Jacob romance...for adults. I mean, Stephanie never said "dick" "hard on" or "orgasm". In my opinion, at least. Don't get me wrong. I loved, loved the books. Because I love them, I am taking the time to analyze them. If I didn't love them, I wouldn't give them a second thought. What is it about the bestial gotta-have-you-the-moment-I-see-you sexuality that writers think everyone wants these days? I don't get it, but Edward had it, Jacob had it and now JZB. I fell in love with Barrons because he was so mysterious, not because I thought he would look at me and want to rip my clothes off.. I find that unnerving. Plus, if he liked Mac I'm sure I wouldn't be able to evoke the same reaction. By the time I finished the books, my love for JZB lessoned a few decimal places. Why? Because most of his mystery was gone and all the was left was the savage, bestial sex that you can get anywhere if that's what you're looking for. Really, you can. Mystery is hard to find because usually mystery = serial killer or something equally creepy. I donno. JZB, why not choose someone with some depth? I think I'm slightly disppointed in my aftermath of a read-a-thon because I thought Moning had SO MUCH she could do. So many twists, turns and surprises that she does spring on the reader, but yet so many in the relationship aspect of the book that she just... lets fall flat. Barbie girl has all the guys chasing after her, Just like Bella, and she flirts (and more) with all of them, just like Bella. So I guess I am not disappointed so much in JZB than I am in Mac. It's not his fault he was written to partner plot-wise with a bimbo. Something inside me wants to go and shake JZB and go "Nooooooooooo be more than the Romance-novel hottie. Be mooooooooooore" And then cling to him for dear life.

[Aidara]

I don't want to study. I dont want to be awake. I think I'm coming down with a cold, and it's starting in my head. I mean, I have the worst headache that I've had in a long time that isn't a migrane. That almost makes it worse, in a way. Neck pain, head pain, back pain so bad that even my fingers are tingling. Anywho. Chem tomorrow; most of the day spent studying today after I get some food in me and try and subdue my head trying to explode. Just thought I'd complain while I had a moment to sit down.

[Gossamer]

It's called STESS.

[Aidara]

But I'm not even that stressed about it, which is weird why I'm having this reaction. I know I'll do well, the studying is almost just an assurance thing. Usually, my stress manifests as a terrible stomach ache-cramp-deal. I don't know which I prefer, honestly.

[Aidara]

My Status To all of you that I owe posts, Sira Jameson, Wrenmae, You'll get them later today. I promise. I have some holiday errands that I have to get done before I can settle down for the night to just right

[Aidara]

Update! I didn't plan to be away this long. Almost as soon as I landed back in my home state for the holidays I have been tugged this way and dragged that way. My friends and family seem intent on making sure that I don't have a spare moment thus far. I wish I could say when they will relent Hopefully soon, because I miss everyone and my PC's