Closed Oh baby. Sitting.

[Adam King]

20 Winter 513 What a shyke morning. How did Adam keep winding up into these things? Like, petchin' seriously. It was supposed to be a straight job for Vilhjalmr. Get Fredak "Homewrecker" Homren to commit to getting his workers and mats on the rebuilding job. Nobody sniped abandoned buildings and salvaged their bits for building later on better than Homren in all of Sunberth. Every now and then, Adam had even gathered the odd impromptu team of thugs to make sure a not-quite-yet-abandoned building became fully abandoned to be ready for "The Homewrecker". Then there was that whole business two years ago about Fredak dropping a house on top of the guy who refused to evict. And if there was anything the man enjoyed more than womanising and doing business, it was his twisted sense of humour. He seemed to especially enjoy subjecting Adam to annoying trials as a part of business. He enjoyed King's expressive faces of frustration, he once mentioned. And so, it had come to this. Enter Sharrida Homren. Eighteen, as much as a girl can be a spoiled brat in Sunberth and an incessant bother to her father. Adam had been in the "Homewrecker Office" discussing a good price for the deal when in saunters Princess Homren. "Dadsy, ya owe me a day's day out of fuu-uuun and shoppers dadsy! Nuh-uh! Ya ain't no buildin or un-buildin' nu-thin' naw-haw until I gets my day out! So says I! Mhm!" She pranced about the almost-elegant room, near-swooning. The large middle-aged builder-mafioso had one weakness in the world and it was Sharrida, but escorting the little woman on what was her idea of fun was not really to his liking. "Gi've a sec' with my lil' turnip, Kingsy." said the Homewrecker. Shyke, Adam had been so close, good price and everything. Tying the coat leather around him, Adam came back out of the nice house to Noven and Eleazar. Nov' was along on Seng's behalf and as a muscle-if-needed while Eleazar was readied for... what was it? Contingencies. "'s lookin' good boys, price good, crew's schedgule open. 'Wrecker's daughter popped up bitchin' n' moanin about wantin' quality time or some shyke, but as soon as he gets that settled, we're go-ahead. Just a matter of-" He was interrupted by Fredak's voice, bellowing from the balcony above and behind Adam, who turned to look at the man along with his companions. "So, uh, Kingsy - ma' turnip's right. Naw build-work 'till she's entertained an' that. I do owe her a day of all-she-wants and that." The godfather-foreman's grin extended. "But, it turns out, muh turnip here's even more willin' ta' spend'er special day with three looker young'ins like yerselves ratha' than me. An' noble fatha' that I is, there's no denyin' her her wishes, no Sir." Homren stretched with a shrug. "So how we'll do is - you an' yer boys show'r out, untouched and well entertained. And if tha' all right, then first thin' in the morn'n muh boys are on the Vilhjalmr job first thing afta' sun-up t'marra'!" Homewrecker chuckles, so very amused. "So uh, enjoy! And rememba'." The threatening deep voice came out on cue. "Untouched." The girl had already left her father's side at this point, on her way down to the three. Adam's sight darkened, muttering in disbelief and frustration under his voice "... Oh petch me sideways..." Miss Sharrida Homren was soon to burst out the house's front door for the 'gentlemen' to show her a nice day out. Adam hoped she would at least cling onto Noven or Eleazar's arm, if that was to be a thing.

[Noven]

Alright, he coached himself, a little more to the right, a tad bit higher, and less force. Nov moved his arm back and forth, trying to get a feel for the best angle. Then he threw it as straight as he could, willing it with all his might to hit the mark this time.

Thud.

Noven squinted at where the dagger landed. It had, once again, sunk into the barrel adjacent to the one he and Eleaz had targeted. With a sigh, he walked over to yank his Tamo out of the mutilated wood and blew some of the sawdust from its tip. Eh, could have been worse. At least this time, it hadn't hit the barrel hilt first and bounced off with almost comedic speed and violence. He never did have much patience for this sort of thing.

"Alright, Eleaz," he grunted, folding his arms. "Your turn."

It was boring, waiting for The King to ply that silvery tongue of his on miserly old Fredak. Hence, the target practice. Better than sitting around scratching their asses. Krysus, how he hated these kinds of jobs.

Nov nearly wept with relief when Adam emerged from the expensive, double doors of the Homren estate bearing mostly good news. That is, until the bellow of Fredak's voice sailed out from the balcony above and turned their mostly good news into mostly shyke.

The cook felt his insides crawl as old, Daddy Homren laid out the parameters of their deal. Nov would've asked if the loon was actually petching serious, if he thought it'd make any difference. When it came to that trollop of a daughter he called Sharrida, the cunning business man's usual razor-sharp wit was reduced to one, measly marble. And that one, measly marble had nothing but Princess Turnip written all over it.

No sooner had Fredak laid out his final word than Sharrida burst out of the house, covered head to toe in enough finery to feed all of Sunset for the next two seasons. She looked as smug as if she'd just single handedly castrated each of her slack jawed, astounded chaperones.

And, for all intents and purpose, she might as well have.

"Ello, boys," she simpered. Nov's stomach roiled in revulsion. He wanted very, very much to hail a cab, grab Sharrida by the nape like some misbehaving kitten, and hurl her inside with a promise of ten gold mizas to the driver if he could keep her locked inside for the rest of the day.

Alas, under Fredak Homren's watchful gaze, he could do more than mutter, "Hello, Sharrida" with every ounce of loathing he dared muster.

Miss Princess Trollop descended the front steps with a daintiness completely unbefitting her personality and hooked one laced arm around Adam's unsuspecting elbow, then another around Noven's. "Kingsy," she purred to her left. "Novey," she cooed to her right. The cook felt his skin crawl, but forced himself to maintain composure, until at least they were out of sight of her hawkish father.

The trollop gasped in poorly feigned surprise as she caught sight of Eleaz. "Oh, 'n who's this? Ain't never seen you's before. Mmm, yer a cute one."

She unhooked one of her arms ad held out a gloved hand, dangling it in front of the thief.

Meanwhile, Nov tried his best not to break free and run howling down the streets.

Sharrida? :

[Eleazar Victor Syroin]

Eleazar hadn't quite expected this when he had left home that morning to visit Senghor and Noven on a very vague request. The three of them went back a couple of years, meeting when the other two ran him down for picking their pockets. Having spared him the normal beating, the teen had befriended them pretty quickly, in part due to the fact they were both older, bigger, stronger and a heck of a lot more intimidating than himself. It was also due to these reasons he never failed to show up at their request, although kicking dust around outside some stuff rich guys business house wasn't what he had planned for. At least there was other ways to keep himself entertained in the upper class part of the city, like that man's watch and that woman's pearl necklace. "Alright, Eleaz, Your turn." The thief flinched fearing he had been caught in the act, Neither Nov or Seng approved of his 'livelihood'. Turning sharply to the brunette he tried to figure out just what exactly it was his turn for. It was then the smooth lipped Adam King finally emerged, bringing as good a news as could be heard in Sunberth. Now Seng might be in a better mood next time he came round, no longer mopping around about his parents' house. Maybe if he played his cards right, Eleazar might even get to live there. With Nov cooking for him each morning and a comfy bed, it was a good deal. Still dreaming of a warm bed in the rebuilt house, the 'Homewrecker's sudden yelling sent the teen scurrying behind Noven for protection. Wait what? He want them to look after his daughter!Was he out of his mind? Noven couldn't handle woman at all and the 'King' didn't deal with anyone who wasn't offering him something. This was a bad idea. A bad ide- His own thoughts cut out as the daughter in question flung herself out to greet them. Clothed in the finest materials Eleazar had ever seen, precious stones sewn into the outfit everywhere it would catch the light. Blonde hair flowed out from a matching fashionable hat as her heeled shoes clinked on the ground. “You 'ave gotta be kindin' mi.” He was to escort this beautiful, wealthy woman around town, and he be petched, she was about the same age as the eighteen year old. His heart didn't feel quite right all of a sudden and his face was changing colour, a mute pink to match the lady's dress. Did life just decide to be kind to him for once? Apparently not as Sharrida hooked her self between the Dealer and the mercenary, calling them both pet names. Right, life, I hate you. Wave infront of me this lady and then make her ignore my existance for the rest of day. Brilliant. Thank you very much. This is just perfe- "Oh, 'n who's this? Ain't never seen you's before. Mmm, yer a cute one." You know want I said, forget it, being ignored is fine. For a brief moment, Eleazar could compare himself to a rabbit stuck in the path of a run-away cart. Face ruby red and in an expression of complete shock that the woman had spoken to him, he squeaked out a quick “I am?” before clearing his throat and starting again, grasping lightly the lady's hand in one of his own. “Ay mean, Eleazar. Mi name is Eleazar. Eleazar Victor Syroin to be precise. To be of your service for t'day, mi Lady.” The woman's brown eyes slowly light up, along with her cheeks. This man. This one was going to be her one. Aye, he was a bit on the scruffy side that could soon be fixed. A new set of clothes maybe and a bath too. Maybe some ribbons here and there. Sharrida's grip tighten on 'Eleazar's hand as she closed the distance between them, whispering niceties like threats into his ear. He wasn't getting away from her. Not this one, not this time. “You's is gonna be my Prince Charmin'. 'Is'll be jis' like one 'ose stories, 'em always 'earing.” “'Old on! 'Em gonna be wh-” The thief didn't even get to finish his sentence as Sharrida took off down the street, leaving the other two to stare at the patch of dust where they had just been. Well today was going to be interesting.

Maybe? :

[Adam King]

Having your day made shyke because of the wiles of the Sunberth-affluent while pulling of a legit clean job was as shykey as it got. Seeing that same steaming toxic bubbling mess of shyke (princess-shaped though it may be) onto your mate's shoulders, however, was bliss and almost worth the hassle. Seeing Eleazar panicking without the slightest capability to formulate himself an exit was brightenting Adam's day greatly. He shot a conspirative grin Noven's way and made sure to just walk slightly slower than the lovely new couple to allow them to advance. His hands went behind his back. Yess, Evs had this. Adam had taken note of how often Eleazar made a point of saying his full name, and soon using the E.V.S. intitals to refer to him in irony soon became 'Evs'. Gods protect him. A questione was also sure to be muttered jovially toward Noven "So d'ya suppose they'll name the firstborn after me, you or Seng'?" Adam would keep them within sight range, but not do the slightest thing to draw any more of Princess Demolition's attention. Before lagging significantly behind, however, Adam did almost swallow his own tongue in amusement as he caught a bit of the fast inquisition poor Evzy was being subjected to by his new muse. "So tell mey, luv - 'ow many girls've'ye petched?"

[Noven]

Noven had no words to describe his relief when Sharrida diverted all of her vile attentions to a new toy to torment. He and The King watched, highly amused, as Eleazar was swept along in the lass's chattering. Prince Charming. They were never going to live that one down.

Adam shot Nov a devilish grin, to which the cook returned with a leer of his own. Today wasn't going to be so bad after all. Not with Eleaz now wearing Sharrida's pink laced, metaphorical noose.

"So d'ya suppose they'll name the firstborn after me, you or Seng'?"

"Hopefully one of you two," Nov quipped. "I don't want some poor kid bearing my name porking it up in a frilly dress."

They walked on like this for a good while, the trollop clinging to the thief, rubbing her generous bosom against his scrawny arm, while Adam and Nov lingered a few spans behind. Neither was eager to see more than they were already forced to, let alone somehow risk the chance of becoming involved.

And then Sharrida asked the golden question. "So tell mey, luv - 'ow many girls've'ye petched?"

Nov actually managed to crack a smile, but restrained his laughter for fear of earning Princess Turnip's unpleasant wrath. For now, he remained behind, strolling at ease and occasionally watching for any signs of trouble.

Buildings changed and people grew in numbers as they entered the town proper. It was a bit more high class in this part of the city, but a shyke hole was a shyke hole. Nov was just about to ask where they were actually petching going when the group abruptly stopped.

Well, wudya know. They had arrived at a dress shop.

[Eleazar Victor Syroin]

Eleazar wasn't sure if he couldn't feel his arm because it had been wrenched or the pleasure of the blonde's chest squishing into it had sent it to the realm of the gods. They had been walking, well more like hurtling, down the street for a few chimes now. Sharrida had been talking none stop since she had christened him, 'Prince Charming'. Where did she even get that from? His mother had once told him stories of the royalty before the Valterrian. Most were fantasy things involving the gods and brave knights in armour. None of it was really real just word of mouth tales told around a pub late at night. Yet here he was being made into the very hero of the fantasies of old. Out of one ear the thief caught wind of the two men behind him speaking in bantering tones; mocking his situation no doubt. Oh brilliant. The moment Senghor heard about this, and he would hear about it, the trio would never let him live this down. Till the end of his years he would be hearing 'Oh sure, Prince Charming' and 'Maybe we should leave it to you, Prince Charming'. But for now at least he had a beautiful rich girl on his arm. "So tell mey, luv - 'ow many girls've'ye petched?" And then the thief damn near swallowed his own tongue in shock. His eye bulged in their sockets as not a single sound escaped his moving lips. W-What?!!? Where the petch had that come from? His furrowed brows were met with the radiant expression of the woman holding his arm captive and a light hearted giggle. “Ah, 'e cutie pie 'sn't got ab't much yet, huh?” Cheeks burning, the teen ignored the reactions of the men behind him. He was going to never live this down. Never. Not even in a thousand lifetimes. It not like he could afford a whore since he was only barely making the rent as it was. Although if he had to bed a harlot it would probably be her. That scared like thing that had caught him red handed breaking into the Scarlet Sanctum. She was soo pretty and so small and fragile. Like a doll or a child. A ghost of a dark haired girl zipped past the running pair. Whipping his head around Eleazar was greeted with the sight of nothing. No. Not now. Go aw-. The thief's thought process was interrupted as Sharrida slammed to a halt in front of a shop. A dress shop. What the petch? I though I was Prince Charming, not the Princess of Thieves. Although she had always been his favourite character from the tales. A cunning street mouse that overthrew the tyrant king enslaving the people. But seriously why was he.... The blonde terror was pushing him through the doors. Oh shyke! He wasn't rich or fancy enough to be here. Had she lost her mind? Obvious the stick, thin sharp chinned man inside the shop thought so too. He glared down the grubby teenager from behind the counter like he was some ill breed street prowling fleabag, before noticing his favourite client and stretched his teeth out from below his moustache. With a small mock bow, the pompous shop dresser clapped his hands together twice summoning out an equally as thin young woman. “Mistress Homren, What, may we, assist you, with today~?” The words were drenched in over pronunciation and fake accent. The bouncing blonde behind him didn't seem to notice though, obviously too excited by her idea to stand still. Prisoner between two evils Eleazar sunk his head down into the neck of his coat collar in hopes of going unnoticed in the small shop. “'ello Jakob. Ay want ye ta make 'is li'le ducklin' inta mi Prince Charming fer me.” The horror in the shop owner's eyes was obvious. She wanted him to make this into a Prince. He wanted the vermin out of his shop as fast as he could. The very idea of serving it as a customer wasn't even allowed to enter his greasy head. Once more a curtious bow and more treacle like sweeties dropped from his lips. “I'm afraid, Madame, we are a dress shop. We design and make clothes for beautiful women such as yourself. I apologise but we can't help-” “Oh! Ay'm s'rry ay j'st wis thinkin' 'at 'e great Elijah Jakob Millton, c'ld 'ndle a chall'nge. Or is he j'st a one trick pony?“ Predator eyes locked with her prey, the trap had been set. A staring contest, a little too short to be called that began and ended before Mister Millton conceded to the girls wishes. She very was good at getting what she wanted, and he wasn't about to back down from a challenge. Silent through out the entire thing, Eleazar squeaked as Mr Millton grabbed his upper arm and hauled him through a door in the back of the shop, barking orders at the thin girl going by the name of violet. What happened after her entered those doors, Eleazar vowed to never speak of again. Barely a chime had gone past before his screams could be heard. It took several more chimes and a lot of splashing and swearing before a clean Eleazar, now in a white linen shirt and trousers, both designed for women, was thrown back into the room, followed by the tailor now covered in soap suds. Lets just say, the thief had learned the main uses of warm soapy water as a torture device.

[Noven]

Nov was at full leer now, able to hear every word Sharrida was spewing. He felt practically delirious with amusement. Even though, moments ago, the King had ducked out with claims of needing to piss. The bastard had doubled back faster than his partner could question his true motives and slipped away with impressive speed. Which left the cook on his own to deal with the two budding lovebirds.

But what came later...oh, what came later made up for everything.

As soon as they marched into the dress shop Noven stiffened. His arms crossed, his countenance darkened, and he was determined to acknowledge no one. Being in hoity-toity places like this made his skin crawl. He hated it with every inch of his being and he was certain Miss Turnip the Great Big Whore knew this.

But this was their job. As much as he wanted to see the little brat skewered like the roast she was over a spit, he needed the money and rep more. Not to mention getting on the bad side of Homewrecker Homren was not something he even cared to think about. With Adam temporarily gone, Noven was the only real muscle in the group now. And if they let Sharrida so much as prick herself with a splinter, they may as well just starting digging their own graves.

As the merc was chewing over troublesome matters in his own head, a ruckus erupted from somewhere in the back. Eleaz was screaming. Nov was halfway across the room, Tamos unsheathed, when his friend was brought back out, smelling quite literally of roses.

He stared at the kid for a full five ticks. Then Nov doubled over and guffawed, Tamo-wielding fists pressed to his thighs.

"Well would ya look at that?" he exhaled as he resheathed his daggers. Meanwhile, the store owner had turned white as a sheet at the sight of the gleaming weapons. There weren't enough pages in a book to describe his helpless regret at ever having opened shop today. "And here I'd been thinking mud was your natural color. Oy, Jakob. How would you describe this?"

Nov ruffled through the thief's now squeaky clean locks, sending drops of water flying every which way. Jakob flinched violently and tried his best not to end his own life right then and there. "Somethin' fancy, eh? Like, cocoa brown, or, or...ohh I know, coffee. Coffee's nice and expensive, ain't it?"

Sharrida hurumphed and stepped forward to slave away the snickering merc's hand. "Don't ye be makin' fun of mi li'l ducklin'. Ay think he looks right scrumptious."

Noven only laughed harder. Scrumptious. Stars and stones, Eleaz was never, ever going to live this down.

Tired of her second body guard's rude behavior, Princess Turnip shoved him away so she could return her attentions to her 'Prince Charming.' She then walked to and fro in front of the stricken looking thief before purring, "Ay'm thinkin' ribbons. What d'ye think, Jakob?"

The poor man was dreadfully tired of being asked questions he had no desire to answer. But this was Homewrecker Homren's daughter. He had no choice but to oblige.

"Why Miss," Elijah sighed, "I think that is a delightful idea. Violet, quick. Fetch us our best ribbons, please."

"Yes, sir," the waifish girl nodded and scurried away to do as she was told.

Noven found a comfortable seat in the back, kicked up his feet on a table--much to Jakob's over-strained horror--and propped his hands behind his head. This was going to be one of the best shows he'd seen in a while.

[Aladari Coolwater]

Grades Ahoy!

Name:Adam King

If you ever return, please PM me and I will add your grade.

Name:Noven

XP Award:

• Weapon: Tamos +1
• Observation + 2
• Socialization +2

Lore:

• Working a Boring Job
• Behaving in Front of a Lady's Father
• Eleazar: Prince Charming
• Eleazar: Really has Coffee-colored Hair

Name:Eleazar Victor Syroi
XP Award:

• Flirting +1
• Socialization + 2
• Observation +1

Lore:

• Flirting: Becoming Prince Charming
• Forced into a Bath
• Dressing in Women's Clothing
• Noven: Loves Mocking

Comments :

A rather cute little thread. Going into this, I thought it was going to be an abadoned thread, but I do believe it wrapped up quite nicely.
Please don't forget to edit your request to show the thread has been graded. If you need anything or have any question, PM me or Anarkhos.