Knights in Stolen Pelts [Markus Andres]

[Nidassasyae]

So he didn't know. That wasn't surprising, Kelvics were not very common in Syliras, apart from when she had met that petching Lelio and his well behaved friend Tohka. "Well..." Nidae considered for a moment, wondering how to explain this to someone who'd never Bonded, or seen the effects of a Bond. "It's a bit hard to explain, but I'll do my best. We are born with this need to find a Master, Kelvics search for one who would accept them. I don't know why this is, I don't know if there's other races who have this need. The Bond is really all that matters to us, and its gnawed at me for my entire life." "When I Bonded, I could feel my Bondmate's emotions. I'm pretty sure that happens to all Kelvics who are Bonded, but I have no way of knowing for sure. Sometimes, I forget that those emotions aren't mine. When you feel a steady flow of feelings, they seem as if yours. I don't know what I feel anymore... or if I do feel anymore." Her voice rose slightly in distress, but she forced herself to continue. At least that part of the explanation was over. Shock washed over her as Nidae realized what she was telling this stranger. She owed him an explanation, not a detailed description of what she was feeling. Yet oddly enough, the Kelvic felt that she could trust him with that. Nidae was not kind, not an innocent and frightened young girl like her explanation might have led some to believe. Yet, can't even a wild animal be temporarily soothed by a comforting voice? But they could also bite the hand that fed them. "I felt my Bondmate's anger and thought it was my own. That's why I acted like I did. I'm sorry," she apologized again, ending her explanation. There really wasn't much more to say, unless he had some sort of question. She hoped he would think that her temporary hatred for humans was brought on by the anger combined with her animal side, not the chance that her Bondmate might actually hate humans. She had no qualms about telling him about herself, but Seliarus was a different matter entirely. Her life didn't matter, Sel's did. The stranger could ask all he wished, but there was no way Nidae was giving up any information concerning her Dhani Bondmate. She'd die first.

[Markus Andres]

Markus listened to Nidae talk, she said quite a lot. Some things Markus wasn't sure what meant and some things he couldn't relate to, the gnawing need to bond with someone. He simply couldn't grasp that concept in his mind. Nor could he really wrap his mind around the idea of feeling someone else's emotions. He could understand empathy. But not the concept of actually feeling others emotions. Perhaps it was some sort of magic he didn't understand. Markus had never had much to do with magicians or magic in general. So his knowledge of it was limited, at best. But she mentioned other races. Other non-kelvic races, or other animal races in the kelvic race? The comment that she didn't know if she felt anymore. Made Markus feel sad for her. He wanted to reach out and pat her on the shoulder. But, that seemed inappropriate at the time. Equally because they were total strangers and partly because he feared she might eat his arm if he touched her. There was silence and Markus noticed how Nidae seemed shocked all of a sudden. Was she telling him something that was a secret? Or was it because she could see the sadness in his eyes? He didn't know and he didn't have long to think about it before Nidae was apologizing for her behavior in the city again. Mentioning it was her bondmates anger that had affected her then. "As I said, it is alright. Especially if it wasn't your fault." Markus said. Not knowing what else to say. Then something dawned on him. If she could feel her bondmate's feelings... If he just accepted that absurd fact... then could her bondmate feel her feelings? Or was it a one way ... road? Travel path? Trade route? Was it like a conversation? You both share what you 'feel'? "Do your bondmate also feel your emotions?" Barely had the words left Markus mouth before he realized something. That he had ignored something important. Something he shouldn't have missed. Markus wouldn't give her time to answer his question before speaking again. "are you afraid that you have lost your own identity to your bondmate?" Markus would simply ask her. Probably sticking his nose into business he had better steered clear of, but he needed to ask her. For he felt like he needed to help her if he could. It was part of who he was to help people if they needed it.

[Nidassasyae]

The first question seemed innocent enough, but the second struck her like a spear in the chest. It was a question she had never asked herself. Could she have been afraid of the answer, that she had just pushed it away into a back corner of her mind?

It certainly could.

"Yes, my Bondmate knows everything I'm feeling. Though unlike me, he doesn't confuse it with his own emotions. It's because I'm weak. Too weak. No matter what shape I take, everything's just confusing." She almost spat the words out. Horrified to be saying them to an almost complete stranger, yet it brought on such relief that she could still say these things out loud, still know that they were her own emotions.

"I don't know. I don't know anything anymore," Nidae answered to his second question. "Should I be?" Her eyes darkened from their icy color to a stormy blue. She hated not knowing what was happening around her. The Kelvic girl craved that knowlege at least.

Her mood had shifted as quickly as a tropical rain. The girl strode forwards, stopping barely a hair's breadth away from the stranger. She tilted her head up to meet Markus' gaze with her own. In human terms, the two would be the same age, but similarities ended there. He was far more muscled, and almost a full foot taller than her. But that didn't matter to frail and petite looking girl. She peered suspiciously up at him, not intimidated in the slightest.

"Why do you seem to really care? I don't even know your name, but you seem concerned about me. Why?" Nidassasyae was unused to this kindness. She felt that Nehsmay was an exception to this human norm of usually not caring. They went about their way, and she went about hers. There seemed to be nothing wrong with this, but the fact that this strange male seemed to actually care was odd, and piqued her curiosity.

But she was also a bit suspicious. This man was of a race that her Bondmate had hidden from for countless years. This city he resided in was one that Seliarus had avoided for a long time, fearful of the predjudice and racism that could be found here. This stranger couldn't be asking her these questions because he wanted to know about Sel, could he? It was paranoia, pure and simple. But she doubted that could be true, of all the people on Mizahar, how could he know anything about her Bondmate. It made no sense whatsoever, but even that reason couldn't dispell the nagging doubt. She wanted to know what was it that made this human so different from the others.

[Markus Andres]

The girls revelation that her bondmate was also able to feel her emotions didn't surprise Markus as much as the her concept itself had. Some sort of paranormal or supernatural link between kelvics and other races. This so-called, bonding. He was still having a hard time grasping the concept plus, he really wasn't sure if the kelvic wasn't just pulling his leg. But she seemed real. Her emotions seemed sincere and Markus was the trusting type, so he would take her words for the truth. Even though they sounded strange. Then, she answered his heavier question. She surprised him with her honesty, or what, Markus perceived as honesty. For she seemed to dodge the question, somewhat. Asking him if she should. But before Markus could respond. It seemed like she changed - influenced by her bondmate, perhaps? Was he sensing her emotions as they spoke and responded in anger? Or was it some primal instinct designed to protect her from getting hurt emotionally? Markus didn't know, for the kelvic moved into the offensive with her questions. Getting up close and personal. Asking him what his motives were behind helping her. Which Markus wondered about? Was it really so strange for people to help others out of kindness of their heart? Maybe it was, or this girl was just very distrusting. Which seemed about right too. Markus didn't back down or look away from the girl, just looking directly back into her eyes. Feeling the sadness and the desire to simply scream at her. Scream at her that her own identity was one of the most important things for any sentient being. ANY sentient being. He would let half a dozen seconds pass before he spoke. "Markus Andres, pleased to meet you." He would start as a smile crossed his lips. "I like to think it is in my nature to help people. No matter race or stature." Markus said with a more idealistic tone in his voice. "I know I can't help everyone. But I can try my best." Young and naive. But Markus had to believe that he had changed. "And, Nidae," Markus placed his right hand on her left shoulder and his face turned from the casual happy face, to a more serious one. "I wish I could give you a simple and clear answer. It is your decision and I can't imagine it will be an easy one. But I gather you have two choices, give into the bond and just accept the loss of yourself. Or stop being weak and learn to maintain your sense of self, in the bond. Rather than submitting to your bondmates stronger will." Markus had had no idea that he was going to say that much. But as he spoke his mind cleared and he remembered how his master rarely had given Markus advice like this. Giving him a tough choice to make. Markus really couldn't say if his words would help Nidae or if he had just made a fool out of himself. Probably a mix of the two, hopefully more of the former rather than the latter.

[Nidassasyae]

Nidassasyae's suspicious expression faltered, instead turning into a frown. That tone carried something familiar. That naiveté, that staunch and pure belief in his voice reminded her of someone. Nehsmay. Of course! The one human who had been kind to her. The woman who Nidae thought of as a sister seemed to share the same values as this Markus. They both believed in treating all people well, and helping anyone in need. Nehsmay had wanted to help Seliarus, even though she knew what a Dhani was capable of. Then again, so had Nidae. The Kelvic girl briefly wondered where her naivete had gone, her acceptance of all people. But she remembered all too well. Hate was intoxicating, and the steady stream of it that her Bondmate felt for humans seemed never ending. It filled her at times. She didn't know whether this was because of the emotions, if she was just protective of her bondmate from potential enemies, or a bit of both. A distrust of the race had already begun to take root deep within her mind. But she could not distrust Nehsmay. Never Nehsmay. Her brow creased in thought. If Nehsmay was an exception to this irrational distrust, could Markus be? He seemed to care, he had put up with her rantings, and still strove to help her. Perhaps he could be trusted. "But how do I know what is me and what is not? How do I know what I am feeling, Markus?" she asked in a small voice, trying the taste of his name on her tongue. A honorable sounding name. She no longer glared up at him, but met his gaze with a hopeful and tired look. Nidae wanted to be sure of things once again. She wanted to know what was happening around her. The Kelvic wanted to know who she was. This Markus, for all that he knew nothing of Bonding, seemed to understand better than either of her companions.

[Markus Andres]

The hardness seemed to be gone in the girl. Had he said the right thing? Or was she just amused at what he had said? But still, her question to him, was perhaps impossible for him to answer. He was already having a hard time grasping the concept behind bonding and what he had said thus far, was perhaps accurate enough to give her some minor advice, to make her think again. But Markus simply didn't know enough, or he felt, that he didn't know enough to help the kelvic girl. 'Is this the extent of my capabilities? Am I just going to give up at the first sign of resistance?' Markus thought these depressing thoughts as he contemplated on what he could do to help the girl. He simply refused to give in to those depressing thoughts. He also refused to let the girl go. He saw his hand on her shoulder and that was when something dawned on him. Perhaps this bond was not like a conversation. What if, it was more like actually feeling someone? Just like he was feeling her shoulder under the palm of his hand. He could feel her shoulder. It made things a bit easier for Markus to understand and an idea formed in his mind. "You can feel my hand on your shoulder, perhaps it is like that? If I stood with my hand on your shoulder like this for a while, just touching, you would no longer consciously notice my hand, but it would still influence how you stood and moved. Perhaps, you have just gotten used to your bondmate's constant touch. Maybe, you just need to try and focus on what is coming from outside your body." Markus couldn't know if what he had just said was correct or not, but it was the version of it that made most sense to Markus. "Not sure, if that... Err.. Makes any sense."

[Nidassasyae]

Nida hadn't shrugged off his touch... yet, and that seemed like it had been a wise decision. Apparently he was using that gesture as an example? As a learning tool? Concepts were hard to understand for Kelvics. They were complex, abstract. She wanted things to see, to touch, not to only know that they existed through the powers of thought. But she tried. She wanted to understand. Her brow creased in thought and her eyes closed as she struggled to try and absorb this information. Focus, Nida told herself, delving deep into her mind to try and understand what Markus was telling her. Yes, she could feel that fair pressure that was her Bondmate. It wasn't uncomfortable, but rather like Markus had said, just like a hand on her shoulder that she had gotten used to. She could sense his emotions from him, and understood that they were coming from a different source, caused by things that were happening around him. They weren't hers, for all that she could react to them, and they carried a quality that was instantly identifiable as Seliarus'. Her emotions were somewhere else within her, and she did not know where. All Nida knew was that the two streams of emotion were different, that she could recognize now what was hers and what wasn't. "Yes, I can focus on either stream of emotions," she said quietly. Nida didn't know if that was what he was asking, it was hard to understand all that abstract information. Hopefully he could elaborate if she had misunderstood.

[Markus Andres]

Until NIdae told him that she had managed to focus on the two 'streams', Markus hadn't known if his little idea would work at all. But it would appear that some deity had looked kindly upon Markus and guided his thoughts in the correct direction. For Markus, helping a person understand something, oneself hardly understands, is perhaps something outside the realm of a mere mortal like Markus. Markus made a mental note to himself that he should visit the temple of all the gods and send a prayer to them and thank them for blessing him with guidance. He noticed his hand was still on Nidae's shoulder. His little comparison had worked nicely and he assumed he could move it from her without it disrupting her train of thoughts. He simply let his arm and hand hang relaxed down his side. "That is great, Nidae." Markus said with a smile on his lips and a small nod of his head. "It is good to know you cam distinguish between your different emotions now." Markus almost reached out and patted her on the shoulder. But he decided not to dare touch her again, for she was still part animal and breaching personal space repeatedly or just once, could be a very serious thing to do. Then again, she had been standing like, half a foot away from him for a while now. Which he found quite disturbing of his own personal space. If she wasn't a female, he would have moved away from her a while ago. "If you don't mind me asking, what is your Kelvic form?" Markus, although very interested in the mystical concept of mental bonds and what not, needed to get his mind on something else. Something equally interesting. The idea of a human being, transforming into an animal. He doubted he would get to see the transformation, but just picturing the girl now and the animal she could turn into. It would be extraordinary.

[Nidassasyae]

"But I'll still get confused," she protested, shaking her head. "But that doesn't matter, I will keep trying." Nidae smiled thankfully up at Markus. "I- I don't know how to thank you, Markus. You've helped me with something no one ever could... or would." She stepped back. Nida trusted him now, but that didn't mean that she'd continue standing there. Trusted or not, there was really only one person she felt comfortable to have that near to her. Markus was not that man. "I am a Snow Leopard," she answered proudly. "I don't mind you asking, it is my natural form. It's what I'm meant to be, not this patchy and pink skinned two-legger... no offense." She really didn't mean anything by it, and that was pretty obvious by her tone. It was simply the truth. "Do you... Do you wish to see me as I truly am?" she asked Markus tentatively. It wasn't that she was protective over who got to see her true form, but Nida was a bit nervous over whether he would still think of her as a being who was worth helping, if he saw her in leopard form. People usually didn't, and she wasn't eager to lose a potential friend that way. "It wouldn't be fair, if you'd gone out of your way to help a Kelvic, and not shown a transformation at least. I mean, if you really to," she said.

[Markus Andres]

Markus bowed his head a little to graciously accept her gratitude. She seemed intent on thanking him profusely and he would just have to accept that with a smile. Then she told him what her alternative race was and Markus scratched his cheek. He had already thought it was a feline creature, but a snow leopard was not what he had pictured. Especially not in a climate as mild as Syliras'. Markus still let out a little hearty laughter when she spoke ill of his entire race. His laughter stifled when she asked if he wanted to see her real form. "Yes." He said with barely a seconds hesitation. Seeing some sort of magic at first hand. It would be an experience. He had always wondered about magic. Half and half feared and admired it. The idea of people controlling elements or transforming intrigued him. "I mean, if it is not too much of a trouble to transform. Or if it hurts." Would it hurt? Magically relocating your entire body? God he hoped not. Poor kelvic race. Markus took a step away from Nidae, giving her some space to perform her transformation, if she desired to show it to him still.

OOCSorry for the late reply, been attacked by a vicious exam