(Flashback) Numb

[Tebridiar]

Year 509, Summer, Day 67

It was horrible here.

In Tebridiar’s eyes the streets were dirty, forgotten, feel of urchins, vagrants, ruffians and basically the sort of people you would avoid in regular life actually seemed pretty decent in comparison to the type of folk you got round here.

She stuck close to her Master, staying right behind him at all times, looking warily around at the dark alleyways and passages that made up the city. A group of tall, burly looking men came round the corner, and her Master raised his arms in surprise.

Tebridiar grew tense. Was there going to be fight?

“Beck, Tanson!” He cried, holding out an arm in welcome. “God, its been a while. How have you been?” He smiled, looking at the other men and shaking their hands. They must know each other. The young Kelvic tried to sink away behind him, trying to go unnoticed. It didn’t work.

“Hey, who’s that? A new pet of yours?” One of the men jeered, pointing in her direction. The Master turned around to look at her, giving an unnerving smile.

“Yes, she is. A little Kelvic girl, I’ve had her for about a year now.” He grinned, vaguely waving an arm towards her.

“Is she a nice one, then?” Another man said, trying to get a better look at her. “Better than that old panther of yours? What, did she die or something?”

“As far as I know, she did die. Yes, the panther was a good slave… she did feel attached to me. This one, not so much. But she’ll warm up. They always do.” He gave a croaky laugh, which the other men returned.

“Well, how about we go into the good old Tavern and have a drink, eh? Catch up, like old times!” He suggested, pointing to a place further up the street. The men seemed to like that idea, and with that they walked to wards it.

Tebridiar had a bad feeling.

[Tebridiar]

The tavern was old, stale, smoky. But it was busy, there was hardly any room to get in or stand. You had to squeeze up to the bar and listen to freaky old men and strange creatures shout loudly about their travels. It was too loud, too noisy.

The Master turned around to check on her.

“You, keep quiet. Stay here, don’t want you getting lost. My friend Beck has a room in this place, upstairs. We might stay there for tonight. You got that?” He hissed, having to get really close in order for her to hear. Tebridiar nodded, not meeting his eyes. She just wanted to leave.

The bought a round of drinks, slurping them greedily. They exchanged tales of their travels, how Sunberth had deteriorated further, current situations, and most importantly, they talked about Tebridiar.

“So, you said a year right? And she’s still not bonding with you, accepting you?” One of the men said, seeming worried. “Maybe she’s not right in the head, like.”

“No, no. She’s very, very smart. She reads a lot. She’s quiet, doesn’t talk much. Not to me anyway. She sort of stopped once her mother died. She just seems to hate me. But she's easilly forced.” The Master explained, looking a little annoyed.

“Mother died?” One of the men, presumably Beck, piped in. He was the biggest, widest and the toughest looking. “You mean you adopted her? Why bother, she seems an ungrateful little pig.” He turned around to look at her, eying her up and down.

“No, no. I took her father to Ravok, he was… slain. He was too unruly. Her mother just died a few weeks later. I mean, Tebridiar never liked me, not after everything I’ve done for her, but now she just refuses everything I ask of her. Like she’s shut herself off.” The Master replied, shaking his head.

“Don’t worry. I’ll make sure she changes her ways.” Beck muttered, eying the girl up again. She felt uncomfortable, and stepped a little further back.

[Tebridiar]

The night roved on, and the cups of used drink were piling up. Each of them must have gotten through maybe five at the minimum, their words were slurred and they were getting a little louder with every sip.

Tebridiar had sat herself on the floor, staring into space.

Was this what she was destined for? Feeling like a bag of dirt her whole life? She just wanted to fade away, walk alone. She could try to run, but someone would get her. She didn’t stand a chance on those vile streets. She curled her lip in disgust just considering it.

“Well, Tanson…” Beck drawled. He didn’t sound as drunk as the others. “Coming upstairs? You can pop down for a few drinks, they might even bring them up if you pay a few extra mizas.” He stood up, nearly tripping over the little Kelvic on the floor.

“Hey, Moriar. Watch your pet, I nearly fell over because of her. Stupid animal.” He groaned, heavily stepping over her on his way to the grimy stairs that lead up to the houses. “Coming?”

The rest of the men wobbled to their feet, eager to get upstairs for some reason. They all slurred various agreements and followed the large man. The Master dragged Tebridiar to her feet.

“Watch it, stop acting like such an idiot, Pet.” He growled, yanking her forward and up the grubby steps. She was like a little rag doll to be dragged and taken everywhere. She hated it. She even envied the cock roaches on the floor, atleast they had much to eat and free will. She had nothing except the clothes on her back.

[Tebridiar]

The room was almost as depressing as the rest of the city. A few little stools and chairs huddled round a table, a cabinet, and a low bed with stained covers. This wasn’t a home, surely?

The darkness outside seemed to saturate this dank little hovel. There was bits of mould on the floor, and the paint on the walls was crumbling. Was this whole city a decrepit mess? What had happened to it… a fall from grace.

She was shoved in a corner while Beck ushered them all in, giving them a quite tour, not that there was much to see. They talked loudly at the table with their drink. Maybe they were gambling, maybe they were just talking, Tebridiar didn’t pay much attention.

She just sat staring into space again. Her eyes didn’t ever seem to focus on anything anymore, the little twinkle was gone. She longed for a shower, she hated her hair right now, It needed washed. She needed washed. They had been sleeping on the road in her Masters tent for the past few days. It was better than Sunberth. She’d rather sleep up a tree for the rest of her life than live here.

Those men must have talked for hours, but the noise downstairs was as loud as ever. Tebridiar had never experienced a bar, or drunken behaviour. Her parents didn’t like alcohol, and neither did the little farmer they used to live with.

If this is what alcohol does, who on earth would want to drink it?

But as she glanced over to the table, she still noticed that Beck would look at her every so often. He was still fully aware. Maybe he’d built up a tolerance to the drink?

He appeared to analyse her, but every time she caught his gaze he would turn his head away.

[Tebridiar]

They had finished the large amount of drink they had lugged up the stairs with them, but the men still appeared to be ready for more.

“Hey, Be… Beck? You wanna ge’ drinks?” A rather drunkenly man slurred. Surely he had gotten enough of this horrible substance? He could barely talk, or keep his back straight against his chair. However most of them weren’t quite in this state yet.

Beck shook his head. He didn't look amused.

“Hey, Mo, would you mind getting them?” He growled, addressing her Master. He looked happy to oblige, nodding his head eagerly. He was delighted to be appointed this task.

“Sure thing, just the usual? It might take a while… somthin’ like an hour… its busy tonight!” He smiled, staggering slightly as he rose from his wonky seat. “But I’ll try my best to ge’ up before then…” He took a pile of money that had been laid out on the table, and he walked out the room, giving an awkward wave.

Tebridiar sat in the corner ignored. He would usually threaten her to some degree, but not tonight. He was too intoxicated to bother with her.

She tried to stay in the shadow of the wall, furthest away from the table, pretending she didn’t exist. It was better, she seemed to sense, if she did not attract their attention.

[Tebridiar]

The men talked more quietly now. They seemed to not be… quite as drunk as before. They communicated in hushed voices. Tebridiar didn’t bother trying to hear them. She curled up in a little ball, trying to fall asleep. There was nothing else to do.

She couldn’t get to sleep however, the room stank of alcohol. The smell twisted its way up her nostrils and into her lungs, making her choke a little. Some of the men were smoking too, it was intermingling and creating a truly sickening stench. She tried to hold her nose, cover her face with her hair. But she just couldn’t drift off.

She had to get out of the room.

She knew her Master was downstairs. She hated him but she was sure he wouldn’t like her being covered in smoke and smelling of drink, he would probably put her somewhere else if she knew she was in that much discomfort. Mind you, he did like to keep a mental leash on her…

She slowly unfurled herself, creeping carefully to the door. She knew they would know she was going, but still, something told her to be stealthy, keep quiet. It was dark but she could still make out the watery light sneaking under the gap in the door. She was nearly there, and she was just about to turn the door handle.

And that’s when something in the men’s attitude changed.

“Where you going, sweetheart?” One of the men got unsteadily to his feet, the others turning around. She froze, looking over, wide eyed. She didn’t say anything. But her hand didn’t slip from the door handle.

[Tebridiar]

Some more of the men made to get up, but one man held them back with his thick arm.

Unsurprisingly it was Beck. He seemed to have them all on a leash, as if they knew how far they could push him, and they never questioned his undoubted authority over them. What he said, goes.

Tebridiar slowly twisted her hand, the door was nearly open.

“You aren’t going anywhere, housepet.” He grinned maliciously. He was faster than she was. He crossed the room in a few strides, as she struggled to turn the door handle he shoved a large hand against it, barring her exit. His body weight could keep a few grown men from getting through the door. She didn’t stand a chance.

She panicked.

“I… I… Please, I need to see… my Master, I need to speak…” She was silenced by a strong hand slamming her jaw shut. He smiled as he looked into her frightened eyes, her eyebrows raised. She was terrified, and utterly powerless.

He grabbed her waist and dragged her over to the opposite corner of the room, and the other men got up and followed him, some of them swaying slightly, tottering on their unsteady feet. She was shoved against the wall, quaking.

“Well, I wonder why “your Master” chose you, eh? He told us he got rid of your miserable mutt of a father, and your mother too. Why did he keep you? Think he had you all to himself, eh? Well he’s gone now. And he won’t be back for a little while.” Beck taunted, standing about half a metre in front of her.

[Tebridiar]

Did it last hours? Minutes?

She didn’t know. She tried to shut her eyes, become numb, become dead to feeling and her environment, and everything around her. The truth was she couldn’t deal with it, couldn’t believe what was going on. Her mind would crumble away if she took any of it in.

They had horrible, groping hands. They were strong and violent. She felt like she could have torn a hole in her throat with her screams.

And when they had finished, they dropped her on the ground and left her in the corner. She didn’t move, or make a sound, she didn’t even cry. She just lay there, crumpled. Defeated.

She wanted to rot away, join the festering mess that lay around her, cease to exist. It must be better than this. She couldn’t handle the pain so she just shut down. Tried to close her brain to everything. She could faintly hear the men, laughing and boasting about their exploits. They were proud of themselves.

She felt hideous. Dirty, vile, impure, unclean, ruined, wretched… every horrible word reserved for scum, that’s how she felt. She was wearing nothing, her clothes lay, messed and torn, beside her. She was covered in blood and filth. She felt like she was splitting in two, being torn from the inside out.

She couldn’t open her mouth to say anything, incase she erupted into fits of blood-curdling shrieks and wails, she was using all the remaining smatterings of strength in her body to keep it at bay. She didn’t want them to notice her anymore, what if they did it all over again?

Every time she shut her eyes that was all she could see, horrific images of her torment, her abuse. Like huge scars sliced into her brain. She knew as long as she lived they would never go away.

As long as she lived…

[Tebridiar]

People like to remember the happy times. Like a painting, you usually only see the nice pictures.

No one tells you about the horrible, unbearable times in life. Because it hurts to remember. If you remember, you feel like you could fall apart. Its easier to lock it away, and keep on living. Forget it. Because your usually sure it will get better. Like the little light at the end of the tunnel.

But Tebridiar’s light had just went out.

Her parents were dead. Her happy little peaceful life was ruined, her mind and her personality was broken. Her will was destroyed. She had no appetite anymore, no fight left. What the hell was she? A pathetic little slave.

She was nothing.

Nobody gave a damn about her. She could easily be replaced, sold again, countless times. She would never be happy. She was almost certain she would never walk free again, that was for sure. And if she was free what would she do? She didn’t know how to function anymore.

And that was when her master returned.

[Tebridiar]

His eyes took a moment to register what was going on.

His eyes took a moment to try and reject what he had seen.

His eyes took a moment to put the pieces together.

It was like some hideous parody of a jigsaw puzzle.

“Hello, Mo.” Beck called form the little table. His voice seemed like a monotone, as if trying to pretend nothing had happened. It was like pouring bleach into her wounds. He didn’t care about what he had just done.

The Master took a few seconds before saying anything. He looked at the men at the table, sweaty and satisfied looking. A hell of a lot more sober than they had looked before. He looked at their clothes, some with bloodstains.

He looked at the floor. More bloodstains. Signs of a struggle. Dents in the wall, more bloodstains.

Then he looked at his pet.

She was lying naked, as if she was dead. She looked pale. And she was covered in scratches and the beginnings of bruising. And blood. But she was breathing, however lightly. She didn’t seem responsive at all. Like she was asleep. But those wide eyes weren’t sleeping. They were trying to comprehend. Something that eyes that young should never have to comprehend at all…

It was Becks smile that did it. He just gave a satisfied little smirk.

Then he erupted.