[Issues found by Astator] Parushta (Character Sheet)

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Parushta (Character Sheet)

Postby Parushta on March 21st, 2016, 11:18 pm

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Basic Information
Race: Kelvic
Birthday & Age: Season of Winter 513 AV - 3 Years old
Gender: Male
Languages: Wolf(Fluent), Common(Basic)
Lore/s: How to Preserve Meat, How to Skin and Dress Prey

Physical Description
Parushta is a six foot two, heavily tanned and of average but athletic weight in human form. He has a kind face riddled with marks, freckles and small scars due to past misfortunes. Pasushta is a five foot long, three foot high adult Timber Wolf as his animal form, with black fur covering all but his stark white chest. He is an expert hunter and has calloused hands and feet/paws. When concentrating hard enough Parushta can appear upset or angered, as his eyebrows knit together and his lips form a hard thin line. His size makes him appear intimidating to some, those that know him are aware that he is the walking embodiment of a 'big teddy bear.'

Character Concept
Parushta has no sense of manners. He tends to come across as very disrespectful and rude but when given direction by a respected ally or intimidating foe, he follows it to the letter. He is fascinated by a good story, and often sits with strangers around fires in silence to listen and take in atmosphere, food and delightful smells. While he has solid morals, Parushta doesn't have any problem with stealing or lying if need be. Parushta has an irrational fear of sticky things, a fondness for all food, and is impartial to getting wet unless it is cold.

Character History
Parushta - often nicknamed Paru - was born a large pup with plenty of 'puppy fat' on him to last the harsh winter in Lahvit. His sense of kinship and loyalty meant he stayed with his mother for quite some time. His childhood was a happy yet stressful one. His father had died when he was three months old, so eldest brother Raviik took on the task of leading their family which meant Parushta was often pushed around, bullied or not fed. Of the litter of five, only he survived until adulthood. His three brothers were killed by the elements or starvation after foolishly taking on life alone at too young an age, especially Raviik; who took on two human hunters at the age of two. His sisters Freyja and Juno disappeared under mysterious circumstances at the age of one, Parushta took this the hardest and left his small pack to search for them.
Parushta's first run in with a human was when he was but a boy, at the age of one and a half. On the trail of those who took his sisters, he came onto a small camp and took the form of a man. He was uncomfortably contronted with the realization that humans wore clothes all the time, not just when out in the cold. The hunters took him for a traveler that had gotten into a drunken fight, maybe hit his head a little too hard and stumbled through the snow naked. He was given clothes, a spot by the fire and his backpack. Parushta learned the common language of humans slowly due to his slightly dim nature. At the age of two years old, Parushta gave up the search for his sisters after his mother died. Too stricken with grief, the man became a wanderer. He never stays in one place for too long.
Today he is three years old, still very sensitive when talking about family, and lives comfortably as a traveler. He camps, rents out inns and hunts wherever he is allowed and searches for the one he is to bond with. He ties his backpack full of clothes, food and water in a high branched tree before he goes out hunting to deter larger animals from stealing his food, which he learned about the very hard way. Parushta likes to preserve meat, then cook it though he is terrible at getting the right color in his meat and almost always burns it to a crisp. He is a family oriented person at heart, but keeps himself distanced from others until he feels they can be trusted (or cheated out of some coin).
His fear of sticky substances, foods and just about anything that matts his fur can be tracked all the way back to his days as a pup. Parushta gets squeamish and struggles to get the substance off frantically if he comes into ocontact with it, and cannot explain why he doesn't like the feeling. To him, sticky things are just wrong.

Training & Skill Points
Foraging 10/100
Wilderness Survival - Mountains 30/100
Intimidation 10/100
Hunting 10/100

Equipment/Possessions
Simple leather top, black cloak, trousers, and worn out shoes
One Waterskin
One backpack
- Food for one week
- Flint and Steel

Ledger
500 gold mizas
Last edited by Parushta on March 24th, 2016, 2:38 am, edited 2 times in total.
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Parushta
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Character sheet

Parushta (Character Sheet)

Postby Astator on March 23rd, 2016, 9:52 pm

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Hello there! Welcome to Mizahar! However, there are several Issues that must be addressed before continuing:

  • Animated GIFS, such as the one at the top and your signature are NOT allowed on Mizahar, please remove them or a Moderator will. They take up far too much bandwidth
  • You MUST list a day with your birthdate, that means a number between 1 and 92 as you were born in Winter.
  • Please list your starting and birth cities. As travel is highly dangerous we use these as a marker of: Is it feasible in the timeframe you listed in your History.
  • As Winter of 516 has not come by yet, you would be 2 years old, not 3. If you want to be 3 please alter your birthdate to 512.
  • As a Kelvic you get two fluent languages: 1 being your animal, the other being Common or whatever social language makes sense. Do not go crazy with this.
  • There are NO villages, huts, wandering travelers that could survive on their own against the wilds of Mizahar if they are a master. And even then the huts/villages wouldn’t make it. Too much work there. Please remove all reference of villages outside of a main city from your history.
  • All Skill points much be listed as Starting Package (SP), Racial Bonus (RB), and Experience Earned (XP). This is required, please state where your current starting skills are coming from. Thank you.
  • On the topic of skills. At competent Wilderness Survival you have 2 biomes you can survive in. You can find them in the Progression Chart under Novice in the Wilderness Survival Lore Page: Linky
  • Your lores are too broad. Lores are specific bits of information that your character knows that do not fluctuate or change. Examples: Tracking: Twigs break the direction the Animal is going.
  • You need to remove the Embalming Fluid from your starting possessions as you are not a Nuit.
  • Please list the WHOLE list of toiletries as this is required.
  • Shoes? Please note that
  • Where did the 500GM come from? You get a starting 100GM and if you cash in your housing you get an extra 500GM, meaning you would have 600GM. However, if you cash in the housing you must list where you are staying Inn/Tavern wise. Please be aware that the rent required to survive in those places are not covered by your Seasonal Expenses.
I highly suggest re-reading the Starting Guide, Starting Package, and the Kelvic Lore pages.
Once you have completed this major issues you need to private message me by clicking the envelope to the left below my name.

Thank you,
Astator
Which way do you want to go? Up or Down?

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