[Levi's Scrapbook] Master Psychic-in-Training

[Leviathan]

Levi's Scraps Hey look guys! I've got a scrapbook now! Yay me! Have you ever wanted your future told in very precise detail? Have you ever felt the urge to communicate with the dead? Have you ever wanted to twist your mind and know what it's like to think like Levi? Then I've got a deal for you! For the simple cost of $59.99 (or a couple sporadically placed comments), you too can question the Leviathan! You will have access to his personal readings of the stars! Do you know your Horoscope for the day, month, or year? Of course not! Not unless the true master of Astrology (Me) has told it to you! So call now at 555-555-6660 (or leave a couple of sporadically placed comments). You too can be enlightened! ___________________ You know, rules are simple: 1 - This is all in fun. Do not take anything here seriously. Please and thanks. 2 - You can harass me all you want, I will embrace it and harness your wickedness, turning into my own devious powers. 3 - You may post and comment, chat here for all I care, just don't spam, don't be unnecessarily hateful towards each other (simple easy teasing is alright of course, if they know it's only teasing). 4 - Yeah, if you're going to be reading or commenting here, at least try to have some fun. That's why I'm doing it after all.

[Leviathan]

The lucky ones that get our first Horoscope is... Aries! Today Be careful for everything you today. It is as it is said. Every action has a reaction, however for you it's only magnified, multiplied. Don't step on the crack because you will really break your mother's back. Don't eat fish, because you will really become that which you eat. In fact, I wouldn't suggest eating anything all day if you want to stay the same beautiful you, unless of course you find a person that is both delicious and hotter than you are. If you've broken a mirror at in the past seven years, and your stroke of bad luck has yet to end, you can expect it to be multiplied by another seven years, which is forty-nine years total for you less-than-average mathematicians. You can never be to careful when it comes to love, being paranoid isn't always bad. In fact, I would suggest putting a leash on your boyfriend, lock your girl in the bathroom all day, ducktape your spouse to the bed, and bury your dogs in boxes with tubes being their only source for air, because if they get so much as a whiff of deodorant or perfume, they'll drop you like your hot (and not the sexy way). If you are a Lawyer, Astronaut, or an almost-locally-famous Rockstar, I would suggest switching careers to the most polar opposite choice you can think of, and do it quick. Today is your only chance. Your lucky numbers for today are 14, 94, 37.7, 118, 561/3, and 007. Avoid any clowns you may find without hair, they are not what they seem. It would be worth your time to write down the goals you have planned for your life, because you can then know what to expect not to happen in the next two years. I know it all sounds bad for you today, but all this misfortune can be nullified for those that are truly willing to fight it. Donate your car to a local charity, clean, feed, and shelter a homeless man today, and be a diligent follower of the Republican Party, the Muslim Faith, and Scientific Funding for Discovering the Cure for Natural Blond Hair and you might find yourself blessed by the stars after all.

[Jilitse]

That is what you call pecs. *loves for the Syliras mod and Asheny* I would use your numbers to put a stake on the lottery, sadly the numbers only go up until 55.

*lingers about the scrapbook and rearranges the stars in the sky*

[Leviathan]

LIBRA is the chosen one... Today: Look at you! Don't you feel sexy? Well, you should, because today is the day that the stars tell you that you are, in fact, sexier than you are. I think you'll find yourself much more likely to talk to people. Conceited, you should know better. However, it's not your fault and I don't blame you for trying to act like you have an average or normal social life, today you are just predisposed to think sexy, talk sexy, and drive people away from you with sexy. Mirrors will lie to you today too. You look like you have abs and lost fifty pounds, others see the truth. It is suggested you barricade yourself indoors, prepare for a zombie apocalypse, because more than likely, it's going to start with you. AIDS, Herpies, and severe Peanut Allergies, if you are a Libra, are going to evolve into the Z-virus. For your own safety, or for others if you are doomed, separate yourself from the world and wait for the worst. If you are skilled in making pizza, fast-food burgers, or writing novels and poetry, I would suggest improving your skills further unless you want to have your job taken over by a one-armed man named Carl, and he's a jerk. Your lucky numbers for today are 33, 19, 5, pi, £14, and 1. It is in your best interest to sell your car and give your girlfriend/wife/boyfriend/husband/significant other/child to slavers over seas, it'll be better for them in the long run. You aren't who you think you are, so don't think too hard on what it is you have become or what you want to do because you don't really want to do it and you don't know why you don't want to yet. Everything you say is a lie, and everything you hear is fact, except yourself. If you can scrounge enough money from your sofa to pay off your college tuition today, consider yourself lucky and wealthy, for all these negative effects are truly null... for today.

[Vala]

Dang it Carl!... Kudos for the Z-virus reference.

I really love these Horoscope write ups you're doing, they remind me of this one thing I saw a while ago -

I can't wait till you get to Scorpio

[Leviathan]

I ask Chat what they think should come next when I'm feeling creative, bored, and perhaps a little cynical. But, who knows, scorpio might be next. I happen to be one myself, so it might be better than you think.

[Leviathan]

Warning: You are about to entire a fierce angry Levi rant on Pokemon, nostalgia, and St. Patty's Day. Crude language and really strange personal views are bound to be found within. Viewer Discretion is Advised. I was a kid once. Actually, it wasn't even that long ago that I was a child. There are many days I still feel like one, many more days I wish I was one, and even a few days where I am told I need to grow up because I am acting like one. Pokemon (amazing transition, I know), they were the $hit back in the day. Me and my posse of ten-year-old boys who were too cool for girl-cooties, YuGiOh, or School Homework (I would have been too cool if daddy didn't scare the piss out of me). We were the cool kids, because we did what every other cool kid in third grade did... watch pokemon, buy pokemon cards from allowance we got for pushing all our legos under out beds, and get little pokemon plastic action figures (not dolls... action figures), and we would have a blast. I would buy books that just listed all the first 150 pokemon (Yes, this was when Mew was a mystery star and everyone cried tears of joy when the screen sparkled. IT WAS MEW!!!) and stickers of pokemon to decorate my bedroom door (turns out they stick well after a year or so, getting them off is difficult). The best part was Pokemon BLUE! Forget all these Silvers and Chartreuses and Tickle-Me-Pinks and Whites and Off-Whites. Fuck 'em. Gimme back my blue, red, or yellow and I'll show you how a true fan plays. Pokemon Stadium (No, not the second one), it was a piece of cake, a small piece of cake even. A small delicious piece of cake that was devoured so easily by my chubby poke-addicted appetite that I wanted a second cake, and I pwned it (Oh yeah, pwned wasn't familiar to me back then, if it even existed). It didn't matter what you threw at me, I had my Zapdos and another one-hundred and forty-nine pokemon memorized in my head, beat that Giovanni. That's right scrub. So, you're probably wondering... "What the fuck are you talking about Levi?", and I will respond: "POKEMON IS GAY!" Why's this? They ruined it. Why would you need 746 different imaginary creatures when 150 was already plenty and SOOOOO much more creative? I will still be a child (I'm a man now!) when they came out with the second installation of 5,000,000,000,000 Pokemon, and I cried so furiously my tears were knocking out children across the playground on the older grade's side. I flailed my arms so hard that the population of housefly was decimated in town for three whole hours, and my voice was sobbing so loudly that the power stopped throughout the entire school for a week. And THEN I threw a tantrum. Why did I panic and rage and fight and scream and moan and become depressed over such a small change (It's small now, they add more (and not even creative) pokemon every holiday), but it wasn't! They doubled the thing I dedicated my life to! How was I supposed to feel the same about anything when there was twice as many? Less creativity? I didn't have the money, patience, or will power to master another batch. I hung up my flip-open Pokeballs with stuffed Pikachu and Charmanders to dry, then broke them under my 'Stomping Boots of Executing Violence". Ashes to ashes my friends, and chus to dust. No Pikachu, never again can I choose you. Your perfection was corrupted by your successors, and you can longer hold a place in my heart, for I too my be tainted with their stench. Nostalgia, sucks. I hate it. There's not a whole like that makes me cry (A short list would be death, bullets, stubbing my toe, House, George Clooney's acting, children's laughter, Chinese Food, and SARS), but Nostalgia is one of them. For the first twelve years of my educational life, I was ready to get the fuck out of school, out of this town, and do... something... cool. What? I don't know, it's not important right now. Then, wouldn't you know it, High School graduation, the choir is singing "Last Song Together" and I am forced, practically drug kicking and screaming, to step down from the choir. I did get an awkward hug from the most adorable girls in school, but that also isn't the point. I bawled. Bawled like a little school girl (Or a young Graduated Man now, they can cry too. It's not against the law!!! Go die if you disagree). So yeah, now whenever I drive by my old High School, I cry. When I see a High School buddy of mine, I cry. When I go to college, I think of High School, and I cry. Nostalgia sucks. Fuck you nostalgia. I blow my nose at you! I'm going to kill whoever made you, and then rip out your heart and sacrifice it to a goat. Maybe you'll think twice before screwing with my emotions (Not that I have any, I'm a man after all. Emotions are silly and whatever *scoff scoff*). Ah yes, my favorite because I am racially forced to think so. Yes, that is correct. I am Irish by descent (which means you're from Ireland, so says all three hundred something kids that pass through my work), red hair on my head, my arms and legs, my pits... and... my uh... face. But apparently, despite being one of three redheads in a forty-thousand mile radius, I am the one with 'True Irish Luck'. Don't know what I mean, you soon will. Being Irish means I get stereotyped (just like African Americans, except they get cool stuff like being gangsters and awesome fighters) all the time. Apparently, because of my heritage, I am a drinker, a fighter, and I get angry enough to do either the first or second at the drop of a four-leaf clover designed hat. Now, just because I happen to have a little experience in all three of those, doesn't make it accurate or nice to stereotype me. Really, I don't give two shits about being stereotyped, except for when St. Pat's comes around. The day when the non-Irish are the Irish, and the Irish (By descent) are fucking Leprechauns. That's right. I wasn't Irish for St. Pat's, I was a Leprechaun. I give you permission to pause your reading and laugh at me, smear me, I don't care. I was dressed up, had to play a very cute game of Hide-and-go-seek (except I was hiding those little chocolate coins covered in tinfoil). They threatened to kill my family if I didn't cooperate, and what was worse if once I agreed, the children... let me say that again, the CHILDREN were threatening me, to take my coins, to beat me up and steal my rainbow (how the hell does that work, I have no idea). Well, the kids enjoyed it, I guess that's all that matters. Next time though, when it's Valentine's Day, I'm gonna make my fine-looking coworker dress up for me. Besides, jokes on them, YOU GOTTA BE FUCKIN' MAGIC TO RIDE THE GODDAMN RAINBOW! I would know, I was a Leprechaun for a day (and I was hungover). .

[Leviathan]

Movie Review: Blood of Beasts This is Levi's movie review of a movie which you probably haven't seen, if you don't want to read spoilers, don't read this post, kthxhaveaniceday. As usual, I am exceedingly foul in this. Don't read if you can't find the intended humor please. It's not for you. 2.5/5 or 5.5/10, whichever fraction you like better. That's how I grade this movie. The video was low budget, I knew this prior to watching it, and I was not let down because I didn't get orgasm-inducing effects. I got what I paid for (I watched it online, so I didn't pay a cent). The movie storyline is fairly weak, from start to finish. There's a village of Vikings with typical Viking names, I'd say about three dozen men make an appearance, two females are all I counted throughout the whole ninety minutes of film-watchage. There's a king, his daughter, his daughter's best friend (I swear they're lesbos, but I never got to see any action), the king's daughter's best-friend's lover, who is the lackey and spineless support role for the villain. The villain is a Viking, the King's Daughter's Suitor who becomes heir via King's wish, against his daughter's of course. Daughter loves some kid from the past, who disappeared with several others on this small island that is cursed by Odin. King decides that now is the time to figure out what happened even though it's something years later (and nobody ages a day from flashback to current time by the way). It was the love interest of the daughter. Voyage to this scary place goes shitty when a man in a wolf-skin murders a few people, attacks a few others, takes out some two dozen rough and tough viking warriors, and captures the King, who was abandoned by the villain and his unconscious/semi-conscious spineless support character. They leave, returning home with, oddly enough, about the same number of men (the boat looked about as packed as they left despite several dying and being left behind). Villain claims King is dead, Spineless spills the beans to the King's Daughter's Supposed-Lesbo Best Friend (his own lover, weird love triangle, I know) and the King's daughter. The girls, the only two girls within the ninety minutes of filmage, return to the island, find King, Princess fights the Wolfman but breaks her "Warrior's Promise" to fight fair, so she is captured, King and Lesbo Chick return home. Princess falls for the Wolfman in a nauseating Cliche "Beauty and the Beast" styled romance. She finds out Wolfman is cursed by Odin and has killed because people tried to kill him. They get all lovey dovey, and before they kiss Gaston... I mean the Villain/Heir (along with practically the entire village of vikings except Lesbo and King), slay the beast and drag Belle, I mean King's Daughter, back home. She is forced to Marry the Villain (Yay, King is feeling healthy after a few years of being ill), wolfman returns because he can't die (damn curses), and he challenges Gaston, I mean the villain, for the Princesses Hand and right to rule. He wins, but Princess gets stabbed by Gaston, she dies. Gaston Dies. Wolfman lives. Surprise! Wolfman was the guy Freya (Princess/Belle) loved all those years ago. It was painfully obvious to everyone except the chick of course. The End... Yes, she died. The End. Now the village has one woman left. Poor Lesbo. The movie was fairly entertaining. It was slow, poor acting, no attempt at Scandinavian Accents. Their clothing looked well designed (though much too clean and well kept for warriors), and their armor looked fairly legit (But I'm ignorant of what it really looks like, so yeah). Weapons look made of plastic or that boffer weapon stuff used in that LARPing thing. As I stated in chat, the weaponry looked like it was purchased from the same "Low Prices" bin in Walmart as the acting. My Opinions: Favorite Character - Spineless Support Role character. Even if he was annoying and looked like he would burst into a river of tears if he crushed a bug under his heel by mistake, and certainly too pansy to carry a sword, he seemed to act his Spineless Role fairly well. He really convinced me that he was a Pansy-Viking (then again, everyone except the Wolfman and the people with Breasts (the two of them) were chicken-shit pansies). Overall Character Believability - 3/10 Overall Story Originality - 2.5/10 Overall Environment Detail - 6/10 Interesting Romance - 0.5/10 Interesting Combat/Action - 2/10 Rewatchability - 0/10 I think that totals my average score of 2.5/5?

[Leviathan]

I haven't ranted in a while, but god dammit I feel a need to right now. But first, I have a question for everyone. You can answer this allowed or to yourself, I don't give a damn. Be honest, is all I ask. Do you, the individual reading these words, think I am a hard worker and try my absolute best to be a damn good DS for Sunberth? Regardless of what you think, I think I am a very hard worker, and even though I am falling behind, I believe I'm doing at least a decent job. Now, I don't want to give everyone the wrong impression. I am loving Sunberth, loving being a DS, loving being such a big part of a much bigger plot and city and character development. However, I've come to realize many many things about being a DS. 1 - It is hard as fuck to be a good DS. Whether I am one or not, I promise to everyone who isn't a DS or Founder (who either know it, or have it harder) that it is tough shit. It's not easy trying to keep track of a dozen PCs or more, their Storyteller Secrets, their incomes, their little organizations and their plans and dreams and goals and shit. It's not easy to make sure everyone has a shelter and isn't getting a free 500 gm from their starting package without dealing with it. It's not easy to make a modded thread for every single pc that has anything that they want or need to earn. It isn't easy writing up dozens of locations and dozens more NPCs to run them and to interact with everyone. It is fucking hard to make a city, and to make it run smooth and fun. IT. IS. FUCKING. HARD. 2 - I love the support I'm getting. I don't ask for help often, which is bad because I need constructive criticism as much or more than the next guy, but I absolutely love everyone (almost) for being so positive and patient with me while I'm trying to take control of the chaotic clustfuck known as Sunberth. I feel progress has been made, and there's still so much to do. I hope everyone (that appreciates and supports me) will continue to motivate me. 3 - We are going to drop down to the most basic of rules I learned as a child. "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all." I'm not going to name names, but you can go fuck yourself. You know who you are. I am busting my ass trying to make Sunberth an enjoyable place to RP, I have modded threads that I have allowed you to join, and because something doesn't quite happen as you expected/wanted/planned, you decide to PM a personally offensive message. You may not have meant offense, but god dammit, I am fucking pissed. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Alright, if you read this message, and you know who you are, I would suggest you don't bother messaging me anymore. As far as I can reason, I've done nothing warranting your message OOC over an Issue IC. If you don't like how I do things, you have a dozen other cities in Mizahar that would love to have your bullshit. Thanks. To everyone else, I had to get this off my chest. Hope you can forgive me if I insulted any of you.

[Darik]

*pops in* Hell ya, you're doing an amazing job!