(Training Flashback) Training days Part 1 (Solo)

[Darren]

52th-53th of Spring, year 505: Part 1 of 2 It was suppose to be a great time. So why wasn't it? His father set up his a busy schedule for him this week, in lieu of the regular training exercises that Sifler was able to think up. "Sorry Darren I won't able to play with you this week. Rather I have set up a few appointments I expect you to keep instead" he explained. "Here's a letter of what to do. Don't disappoint me dear boy" he replied before he left. Darren at the time was munching wholeheartedly onto his lunch waved as his parents did business elsewhere. It was only when the sun completely went down an disappeared he had the thought of reading the letter. Darren. Your mother and I are having a bit of time from the hold on a camping trip with old friends. We were almost certain you wouldn't like the ordeal and decieded to give you off to a sitter for the weekend. Remember that man I talk at great lengths while he is over? You'll be rooming with him for the week. His name is Geode and I expect you to be on your best behavior. He's at the Coolwater Hold, so finish up your lunch and head over there right away. Darren slowly taking in the letter took a look outside, wondering who this person was. Why was this guy the one he'll be sleeping over with? "Oh...tck I'm late already" he muttered as he grabbed his bag and jogged over to CoolWater hold. The evening was already looming and it would be already dark by the time he got there he realized. Chiding himself for his lack of responsibility he started to sprint to the hold, trying to make up for past time. "Your late" the voice said as it's owner blocked Darren way inside. "I was also expecting someone that looked a bit more able..." it muttered as he tried to get a decent look at Darren's face. The man blocked was still Darren's way... and continued doing so for an awkward minute before Darren finally replied back. "So I was told that I would be staying here for the weekend?" he replied, raising an eyebrow to the man. "Yes, yes you were. Just taking my time trying to deciede what to make of you. Come in. Lemme get a better look at you and introduce my son." Entering the man's room he sighed in graditude as he was soon protected from the elements. Darren quickly took a look around his surroundings as Geode closed the door abruptly behind him. It looked like an ordinary family room, It's all basics really Darren noticed as he saw there was almost nothing that seemed frivolous or without function in the room. The only thing that stood out was the flowers next to the bed, probably for the man's wive. Small, tidy, and overall the room looked comfortable. Hmm? his eyes froze on the spot as he saw another kid in the room. He was given a dirty look. What are you looking at?!?! he raged silently as the two were introduced. The early signs of a rivalry were in the air as Geode ushered him in. Little did Darren didn't know the rivalry his father had with Geode, who instilled the same hostility to his son to give to him. "Alright you two will be sharing a room together over there. Sleep well tonight we'll start training at the crack of dawn." Huh? Training? Darren thought as he craned his head to look at Geode. "Umm...thank you sir?" he said with a short bow. Almost immediately a hand fell on his shoulder as he looked into the dark, scary eyes of Geode, cold and seething with malice. "Don't thank me yet, you still have a full week ahead of you." oocSeeing as this thread is about me and the kid. I made a npc request at the HD for the guy's son.

[Darren]

Summer 53th, Year 505 When Geode said the crack of dawn he actually meant a bit before dawn actually came. A rough hand shook Darren's very core as he spasmed out of bed, an accusing look at Geode. "It's dawn, get out there with the boy" he said simply before leaving the hold. A bit surprised by the sudden intrusion he slowly made his way around the hold until he found the exit. Outside he looked around for a quick moment before he sighted the boy from last night. Walking silently closer to him he was greeted with a grunt before he stood at attention, Geode suddenly made his presence known as he emerged seemingly from nowhere. "Well glad you finally showed up boy. Me and my boy will be doing snow drills. Your welcome to join if you so please, your majesty" he said with a vile smile. Ugh, I'll wipe that smile off your face disgusting man Darren thought as he joined them, his teeth clenching together. The older man then ran Darren through a crash course of the drills they will be doing. A simple, aerobic exercise that basically works by having the heart work also. After the crash course they quickly settled on a three minute break, with good reason too. Darren found himself taking shallow breaths as they started the break. His surprise was noticed by the boy next to him as his face curled up into a sneer. "Hehe out of breath already? You'd better prepare yourself baby. We only took 10 minutes with the crash course. We got ourself another 50 minutes of pure labor before breakfast. Hope you don't end up on the floor crying at the end of this" he said in an arrogant manner. In short, the boy was correct. It was nothing Darren was used to, the constant jogging, switching of positions, the hard pounding of his heart. It was all new to Darren and it hurt. They assumed a "waiting" position that was actually them running in place. A front position where they dropped down to the floor face first and a back position that did opposite. In those positions they had to preform a set movement, repeated again and again and again before the call came to switch positions and do another movement. Darren noticed that the front position worked on strength related excercises that utlized the upper body for the most part. Push ups, hopping push ups, pumping his legs as he held his body steady with his arms all giving Darren a run for his money as each repetition stole breathe from him until he was told to move. However when the motions switched from the front to back position he found that it wasn't the god send he was waiting for. As he laid on his back his arms moved the smalls of his back where most of his legs did all the work. His legs and his abdominals, he soon realized. He spent the better of two minutes in each position before moving to a new position, the ratio from front to back position to 1:2 much to dismay of his gaping breathe. Geode made sure Darren didn't have much time to rest the first 15 minutes of the exercise. A snarky comment, a less then gentle push to rouse him, a shout. Anything to galvanize Darren into action until he couldn't go on anymore. The back position let him breathe a bit easier but the working of his abdominals at the time made his gulps of breathe short and shaky as he tried to keep his feet raised up, following the motions given to him. Finally a little after twenty minutes Darren couldn't take anymore. His feet falling down to the snow he freed up his arms as he tried to situp on the snow. Deep, fast breathes filled up his lungs, almost chilling them with the cold tundra air that the group were in. Geode not failing to see the motion moved to his position. A unwavering glare aimed at him as Darren raised his heavy head up to face him. "Very good you did a whole lot better then I expected" he said in a low voice. Darren followed the man's gaze as he saw the man's son also was at his limit. A resigned look on his face, he suddenly looked up in fear as he suddenly realized his father was watching. A look of fear replaced his features as he then looked to see that Darren might have showed him up. "Alright we'll alternate the waiting, front, and back positions until you catch your breathe. Then we'll resume the usual routine. Anyone who retires early will have to answer to me. Hope you don't disappoint me." he said in a veiled threat to both boys. A quick nod at the man the man's son quickly found his breathe as he stood up straight awaiting the go command. A look of determination cover him as he looked at Darren with anger, if he wasn't able to surpass Darren he might get in trouble with his father. Darren seeing the challenge collected himself, his hand on reflex went to his watch readying himself, his focus, his flux. The go position marked the beginning of the rivalry between the two. They moved quickly in the snow, using the grandiose motions to switch from to the different positions. The half push up from the front position the swinging of legs using the motion behind the swing to get themselves into a quick back position. A half-situp, moving the legs in front of them into the opposite position as they leaned forward in to the front position. Then after five minutes to get their hearts pumping they then started them preset movements again. Darren a few minutes in realized that the front to back manuver ratio shifted to a 1:3 ratio thankfully. He looked back to his rival to see that he still had the same look on his face as he glared back at Darren. This was to be a battle to the end it seemed to Darren as he found that the two were competing with each other any time a front position was given. At first with no apparent winner in the first few exchanges Darren felt a nagging feeling of desperation and a loss of hope at the contest as he felt that the other boy might be gaining the advantage in the exchange. That feeling was what caused a lurch in his stomach as he suddenly felt himself overcame with purpose, with determination. He had to win the exchange between the two, nothing else was just important. Just this and the moment of victory. He felt the thin strands of his djed suddenly materializing as it moved to the upper portion of his body. The sudden focus helped his breathing, he felt no pain in his palms from the cold snow, he felt alive. A sudden show of power was made as Darren started to pull away from his rival. The burst lasted up until the last few minutes of the excercise. The two were in the most difficult of back positions, coming to the point where they were just able to raise their legs slightly above the ground. A pair of legs declined then the other child's followed until the final moment where Darren's were the only ones left raised. The other boy's were sprawled out in a position similar to Darren when he stopped. A blow from a whistle was made, Darren's legs slowly reached the ground and he easily stood himself up and walked back to the hold. He had won this slight exchange, and left the other boy to the man's wrath as he doubled over in front of the door out of sight, gasping for pockets of air. oocSorry I dragged on a bit on the excercise. I do these alot myself and I'm trying to put down what it feels like to the letter Pic of positions: http://www.armyreal.com/images/apft/7-20_a.jpg

[Darren]

After a few more minutes Darren saw Geode and his son back from the other room with supplies as they setted up breakfast in quick succession. The fare was horribly basic to Darren's dismay. Bread, a slice of cheese, and a fruit alongside with a strange liquid that the man made in the back of the room. Missing the food he had last night he ate sadly at the meager meal given as he silently brooded. They ate in silence, partialy in fear of Geode but mostly due to the lack of energy to do anything else. They didn't seemed bothered by the lack of interaction between themselves in comparison to Darren as he grew up in a chatty, informative family. This tension is so awkward... he mused as he tried to down his glass. After the light fare Geode pulled out a surprising action, from out of nowhere. He started to read. He pulled out a dark runed book from a nearby shelf, telling Darren to listen as they sat down idly. At first it was the usual talks of superior beings, how the vying for power is an important function of life. But an excerpt stood out to Darren as he looked up. Recognizing the familiar words he soon realized it was the words his father said, ...and it looked like it was added to the book. Even many miles away Sifler was able to manipulate Darren's development. Of course... he thought amused as he listened to his old man's favored excerpt. “The only thing that can defeat power is more power. That is the one constant in this universe. However, there is no point in power if it consumes itself. I will enlist the help of an old friend against our common foe; I will use one pawn to eliminate the other, and emerge with the spoils for myself…” Darren shook at the words as he realized he agreed wholeheartedly with the words, a mixture of shock and pride. Geode didn't notice the slight motion as he continued reading something new. By now though, Darren wasn't paying to much attention now as the man spoke of Sagallius a prime example of attaining great power. The man who made himself a god. The initiation process of the entity's gnosis. Two men gifted with one mark and fighting to the death to gain their second mark. The competiton between Darren and the man's boy finally showing itself. All lost on Darren as he wasn't paying too much attention anymore, much to busy with spacing out. Geode should have nudged him, done something to get his attention, but cleverly chose to continue on as his son watched a bit amused at the unknown fate that might befall his unsuspecting rival. In truth they wouldn't be able to choose who they were to face but they prepared for a possibility nonetheless. "Shenri" Geode said as he finished the rest of his book. "It's time for martial practice." he explained to Darren as Shenri left. ...So that's his name Darren mused privately as he followed. It was about noon as they left, the sun shining brightly above and below them as the snow reflected the sun's rays. They went a bit outside the city limits nearing the beach as they jogged. Darren took a look out into the ocean, feeling it's prevailing winds rush over him, sending chills down his spines as he turned to face Geode. "Nice breeze, ...you'll be needing it during this stretch of training" he commented as he looked at Darren. "Want gloves?" the man asked as he motioned to Shenri putting on some boxing gloves, Geode put his hand into his bags to reveal a used set of gloves similar to Shenri's. Darren took a look at the gloves and shook his head at the offer. He already was wearing his normal leather gloves and they would suffice with the type of fighting he would do, besides those gloves looked sorta dorky... A shrug at the motion Geode quickly explained that his son was taught in boxing and a real life sparring session would happen between the two. Of course they would wear protection but he wanted both of them to go all out in the spar. Better to fight in a more realistic manner anyways. And with that a heated spar started as Darren took a defensive position his thoughts trying to recall the pros and cons of the boxing style. I think attacking their legs is the way to go he thought as sent out a few standing kicks in Shenri's direction. For the most part the unfamiliar method of attack surprised Shenri as he took the majority of blows before he finally danced a few steps away. An annoyed look entered his face as he felt the effects of the simple kicks on his legs. Breathing a exaggerated breathe Shenri then started a boxing movement Darren was all to oblivious to as he tried to watch the movement. The next series of kicks were met with a evasive movements as Shenri backed away in a style that surprised his opponent. It wouldn't end there, added manuverability was just the first part of Shenri's tricks. The man's lead leg looking almost set on the ground suddenly sprung in a direction at Shenri's choosing, easily avoiding most if not all of Darren's kicks. Biting his lip Darren tried to keep track of the movements, his patience slowly running thin. Kicks weren't his strong suit as he was taught only in the martial arts of kung fu that utlized his hands more then anything, he was only showing off things he had seen but have never practiced. The movement shown was dazzling to Darren as he was slowly mesmerized as he watched the subtleness of the dashing. Shenri applied most of his weight to the tip of his foot as he dashed away from Darren's strikes. Soon after Darren would realize the movement wasn't limited to backing away but in fact was used to help one get close. Shenri slowly getting the timing of Darren's attacks, finally realized that his opponent's attention much to focused on his legs. It was time for him to attack. Putting both feet down he applied even more pressure then before as he dashed forward, right at Darren's face. A huge hit to his jaw, that was all Darren recalled from the motion before he found himself staring at the sky above him and the sand under him. What just happened? he wondered absently. Not only his sight was disrupted but his sense of balance also as he tried a hopeless attempt to try to pull himself up. Darren was only able to steady himself to a squat only to unexpectedly fall back to the ground. "Hey, get up. Guard your chin next time loser," Geode spoke as he shook Darren back into reality. The sudden interaction scared Darren into action as he was pulled up. He assumed a ready defensive pose before neatly stumbling back to the ground. He watched as Geode gave the signal to resume sparring, Shenri took the initiative as he advanced against the grounded Vantha. The man's dash was something else, compared to the side and backwards dashing that he showed before it was at least a grade better. Shenri closed the distance between himself and Darren, barely giving him time to react. Given enough time to stand, instinctually Darren covered his head in fear of the chin blow that he was given. However, the stance he made in response was a poor stance, especially against a boxer. Quickly realizing that Darren left his body completly open to attack Shenri applied body blow after body blow to Darren's gut. The first blows taking the breathe out of Darren as he dropped his guard, allowing Shenri to aim for the face. Seeing this Shenri aimed an uppercut at Darren's unprotected chin, with enough force to be able send the bigger Vantha a few inches off the ground. Barely having any time to react he moved his head to the side. Avoiding the knockout hit didn't come with a cost. Losing his stance,and in turn his guard, it only came naturally to Shenri as he followed up with a right hook that dug cleanly into Darren's ribs. He hunched over cringing as his insides flared up. The fist bunched into one point instead of an open palm, hurt even more as it positioned itself deep in his persons. Shenri's assault made boxing proud as he pressed the advantage, alternating two hooks with each arm. Shenri then ended the combination with two left uppercuts aimed at his body before he finished with a right straight aimed at Darren's face. "...And that is why boxing is better then that frivolous martial arts that was taught to you," Shenri jeered as Darren was sent back into the ground. He looked to see a nod of approval from Geode before he turned to the side and take a few paces away while he waiting for Darren to recover. The blows weren't as destructive as the first that knocked him down, in fact Darren finally realized these hits weren't even half as good. He quickly pulled himself up as he watched his opponent walk a few paces away from him.He's hurt? Darren noted as he saw the lack of movement from the lower body ...his hips? Darren looked to see Shenri wince slightly as he tried out a full motion, the punches didn't go out properly as it normally should. Mess up his leg, mess with rhythm! Shenri won't be able to move as much as he wanted. I still have a chance...he reasoned. Darren was on the right track as Shenri tried to overcome the disadvantage by a bluff. Farther it didn't matter as much that Shenri couldn't swing his hips in conjunction, so he made dam sure that Darren wouldn't consider closing the distance. The natural swaying and rhythms a boxer makes while striking makes his strikes effective, without it the lack of power was all to obvious to a defender, simply. Darren was not one to be easily tricked or intimidated. A large explination wasn't his style for reasoning. For Darren feeling the difference firsthand was enough. A battle plan now forming in his head in reply to his examination, he steeled himself as he called Shenri back. "Hey, come back here. I'm not done with you yet" he yelled at Shenri. "I'm only getting started, try and face me"

[Darren]

Darren didn't allow Shenri take the initiative as the two dashed towards each other. His eyes lighted with a burning determination as the two started an exchange of blows. The dashing straight that came from Shenri was almost contemptuously parried away from Darren's vicinity as he sent out his own right, hitting Shenri with the bottom of his palm. The blow was aimed to unbalance his opponent as Darren pressed the advantage. Ducking under blind backhand that came in response, Darren focused hit Shenri's body again, aiming at his vitals. Whether Shenri knew it or not Darren was now utilizing flux in his system to speed up his reactions in his upper body, making the other boy's movements seem like almost child's play. Both having dug their feet in Shenri worked himself to a frenzy as Darren dodged, blocked and intercepted every move that the other boy threw, an amazing sight when one realized that they were in such close quarters. Finally Darren finally had enough as he saw his chance to counter an ever aggitated Shenri as he threw out a full bodied straight. The windup for the strike gave more then enough time for Darren to react as a smile formed on his face. He watched the boxing glove come forward a second later before he bobbed his head out of the way and started his offense. In a series of fast, concise maneuvers, Darren directed the blow further then Shenri intended overextending the man's center of gravity. His left hand pushing the strike even further away as his legs moved, shoving at the boxer's ankles as Darren took a step forward. The overall effect causing Shenri to fall forward as Darren directed an open hand uppercut into the falling Vantha with his right. Shenri's eyes rolled up in reaction to the blow, his head bobbing up before falling back down on Darren's "Pathetic!" Darren shouted as he gazed at the boy, if he wanted he could have let Shenri fall. Not yet, he wasn't done with him yet. He turned as he lifted the other Vantha up a few inches with both of his hands. Letting his left hang to the side Darren smirked as he held the other boy at the neck with only his right. His hand shaking from the strain he threw Shenri to the ground as Darren's right leg rose up high. He stamped down on Shenri's chest before Geode intervened. The overall motion took less then five seconds, an overall stunning display of discipline and rage. The flux flowing through his system while in the heated moments of the fight helped made it look so easy. It made it look like Shenri was moving in slow motion, so Darren took advantage. Though he had limited practice with the art it seemed to have an adverse effect with him. The spasms that occurred soon after was somewhat bearable but the lack of control and memory of his episodes was what caused him a bit of grief. The flux energies that were helping Darren focus were slowly draining at his overall control of himself, his sanity and his ability to keep his attacks in check. The fight was interupted as Geode whacked Darren a clear foot or so away from Shenri with a hard kick. Darren noticing the lack of ground, snapped out of his trance as he hung helplessly grabbing at the air until he crashed into the icy sand below him. A look of worry crossed Geode's face as did a look of aggression aimed at Darren as he checked his son's condition. Shaking him lightly Shenri gained consciousness, suddenly grabbing Geode's hand before the rest of his body followed. A bit surprised but otherwise fine, Shenri sat up on his own clutching at his chest. The ax kick aimed at his chest made it feel sore but otherwise he was in a good condition. "I'm alright let me keep fighting" he urged. The expression on his face was enough to convince Geode to continue the match. A bit uneasy about the hits Shenri recieved he looked checked him over a few times quickly before letting the two boys resume. The two boys stood unmoving for awhile until Shenri took the initiative. Putting in a few fients before his dash into close quarters, it looked like Shenri still had quite alot in him. Darren steeled himself as the series of blows flew at him, bobbing, jumping back, blocking. Every defensive move he had he used but it still wasn't enough. He wasn't able to react to all of the attacks Shenri threw at him and eventually sported some new bruises as the fight progressed. Such angles! I can't tell where they are coming from... Darren thought as he eventually gave ground to the hardened boxer. He was able to send out a few attacks in response but they were seemingly negligent in comparison to the flurry Shenri worked himself into. Darren was the first to back out from heated exchange, scoring a hard low kick to the other boy's calf before dancing away a few steps. The way the boxers moved around was uncanny but Shenri wasn't so technical in his approach. By now, after exchanging so many punches, Darren was starting to get attuned to the boxer's movements. Perhaps if he tried he could imitate similar actions... but that was for another time. Now he had to act and this time he would be able to react as Shenri's rush, now he would be able to fight back, Darren was more then ready. In fact he was able to fight back with a bit more then small kicks. He put his right arm behind him as Shenri pushed to forward. Darren surprised Shenri as his left hand came up, moving his fingers back and forth in unison as he beckoned Shenri to him. In his rage, Shenri didn't notice the subtle remnants flux almost resonating from his opponent's left hand. Shenri's attack was a devastating hit but it looked like it didn't even seem to register to Darren. It looked like Shenri was frozen in place to Darren as his hit struck Darren's body. The blow was about to register before Darren reacted, getting hit was part of Darren's move. Darren then pushed foward to deliver his vicious retaliation fighting through the pain. It was one of the few practiced moves Darren was taught by Sifler. He practiced it so many times before wasn't sure he got it down. Now seeing this, in this moment, at this time Darren knew he could pull it off managed to pull it off. Shenri's was sent sliding slightly as he hit the ground, seizing at his shoulder. The other boy cried out in pain as he clutched his shoulder, it felt dislocated, broken even. "What the petch was that?" he stammered as Darren stood over him. For a moment painstakingly it was painstakingly obviousto Shenri how feeble he was against Darren as he laid on the ground paralyzed in fear. The scene would have been made a bit more scary for Shenri if Darren hadn't clutched at his stomach in pain. "Ow ow ow ow" Darren bellowed in pain as the adrenaline in his body started to fade, he was nearly brought to tears by the blow. Now with both boys on the floor, on their back or otherwise doubled over, Geode took over as he pulled the two boys apart. "Enough, you'll have plenty of time to kill each other tomorrow. Though I seriously doubt you'll be able to succeed with such horrible form" he berated as he dragged the boys helplessly across the beach. Perhaps I still have to spend some more time practicing that move, Darren noted as they made their way back. What he was trying to perform was a counter that used his opponent's forward moment against them. The result would be them getting hit by the force of Darren's attack AND the force of their own body as they moved forward. What actually happened was an exchange of blows, Darren was able to hit the boy with his flux in the correct general area but failed to get the first hit in. "Haha you boys can really make sparring look exciting" Shenri's dad laughed as he looked at the amount of bruises and sore spots the two boys gave each other. He looked at Darren in with a bit of envy as he knew well in advance that Darren knew magic. If only he had the means to teach his son the same thing then he wouldn't worry about Shenri so much. He even considered stopping the fight altogether as he realized that Darren might have damaged his own son. But as soon as he realized how inexperienced the boy was he put his faith back into Shenri. He had no doubt that Shenri was the stronger and smarter of the two, that disposition helped put him to ease went on to berate Darren."All the better if we stopped. My boy is still too much for the rich, pompous Sifler boy" he taunted before they finally were able to walk inside the hold. Unknown to him, Shenri was having doubts about the fight himself. He didn't know what Darren had was magic and he feared that he was just holding back so that he wouldn't shame him in front of his dad again. A look of uncertainty crept into Shenri's face as the two boys sat down for lunch. The meal like last time was basic like before, almost on the brink of mediocrity Darren noticed as they ate lunch. Darren didn't notice the change in Shenri's mood as they finished eating, rather he spent most of his time sending off a wave of complains and demands. "Hey old man, do you got anything else to eat in this dump?" was the main underlying words to Darren's prolonged speech. Darren a bit pleased with himself met the expected glare with a challenging smile, he didn't even flinch at the half-swipe Geode threw inches away from Darren's face. What caused him to withdraw was the unexpected explanation given to him, "Well unlike somebody here we aren't as well off as you. In fact to manage another mouth to feed is just taxing on our own plates. I just hope it's enough that pompous, lecherous piece of flesh we are feeding" Geode spat as he turned his head in disgust. The overall mood that followed was broken with Geode suddenly coughing to get their attention. "That's weird, I don't remember the house looking so shoddy" he smiled a very familiar mocking smile at Darren. However, Darren realized the smile was wrong. The smile didn't reach his eyes....Shenri slowly realized what was going on as the Geode and Darren stared at each other for a moment. Smiling conspiratorially with his father he looked on, relishing the situation given to him. "Looks like we'll have to clean up the place don't we?" he asked Shenri who nodded in agreement. Geode took a few paces away from the table to fetch a nearby broom. Without warning he adruptly threw it at Darren "Clean it up" Geode ordered, pointing at the small room they were were in. A bit taken back by the sudden request, Darren had nothing constructive to say back. Realizing he couldn't get out of his task he quietly went to work, anything to get him out of the family's wrath. However this proved to work oppositely to what he wanted. That incident followed with many more chores, easily taking up the remainder of the rest of the day. Usually Geode led with a small act of surprise and the chore; "Hmm, funny that these pots and pans aren't sparkling" or "How off...,we are all out of firewood." Given hard work for the first time in his life, his senses dulled as the evening dragged on. When he finally finished, a layer of grime and sweat outlined his the entirety of his forearm. A stubborn layer of filth he couldn't be bothered with. He rushed back to the house after scrubbing out the bottoms of their the boat Shenri's family had. Scrubbing out the bottom and adding an extra layer of pine tar to finish it off. And having no experience with how to apply the tar the time spent on it seemed to stretch on and on. Each movement carefully watched by Geode. Any mistakes in his process resulted in a smack to the back of the head before being taught the procedure. Finally it was almost time for supper and Geode left Darren to finish the last part of the tarring, an operation that nearly took him another bell before he finally finished. The only reason he complied so meekly was due to the guild he had for acting so poorly at the table, added with the threat of not feeding him supper. No Food!?!? Darren like food! was the prevailing though that repeated itself as he was tasked with the odd chores, emasculating him... reducing him to their maid. He was so distracted with the extra work he didn't realize they might have had supper already by the time he came back. As he arrived at last the supper was already done and over with, just a meager stipend of a cold vegetable, bread and half a slice of beef left for him. He hungrily devoured the morsels of food quickly before Geode and Shenri would show up. They couldn't see him especially in this state. Instead of breaking down, resisting the urge to cry or otherwise feel sorry for himself, Darren chose to retire early to avoid any other tasks and taunts from the pair as he crawled into the covers. Laying under the covers, shaking not from the cold a unfamiliar soft voice broke the silence in the room.

[Aspen]

Character: Darren Skills: Bodybuilding +2, Running +1, Flux +2, Unarmed Combat +4, Lore: Being Late Without Realizing, Repetitive Drills, The Painful Result of Getting Distracted, Figuring out the Opponents Weakness, Unexpected Chores Notes: A good training thread overall. However to gain more xp you should describe the motions more in the future. For example, you mention that Darren uses Flux, but you don’t describe it. Perhaps you could say how he activates it and what it feels like? The same with running – you just mentioned that he did it. You were better with Bodybuilding, but you seemed to describe the positions and what they did, rather than have Darren feel the physical benefit. Your Unarmed was a lot better, but to gain that last point perhaps describe the motions of Darren’s attacks a little more. Since you asked if I had any opinions on your writing, I will say that you might want to work on your sentence structure a little. Some parts didn’t seem to flow quite right, so just look for where you might be able to use a comma differently in the future. If you have any questions or concerns please pm me. (Especially since I am still new at this!)