[FlashBack]A Desperate Plea (Gossamer please)

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This shining population center is considered the jewel of The Sylira Region. Home of the vast majority of Mizahar's population, Syliras is nestled in a quiet, sprawling valley on the shores of the Suvan Sea. [Lore]

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[FlashBack]A Desperate Plea (Gossamer please)

Postby Niall Raghnall on August 15th, 2009, 2:21 pm

Niall lay still in his cot whiole the rest of the squire's slept. It was not the first time he let his mind wander to that day, nor would it be his last. His body was sore from the combat training regiments that Captain Degan was putting him through, but the good Gaptain had always pushed the squires to their limits without breaking them. The lessons taught them discipline while furthering their knowledge with thier weapons.

He Lay in his cot with both hands clenching his Lakan; his mind drifting to that fateful day ...

"Niall! The Captain would like to see you in his private study," a fellow squire yelled while Niall was running the obstacle course on the practice grounds. It took the akalak a moment to let the words sink in ... in his private study ... had he done something wrong? The other squires all looked at him as if he caught some rare and uncurable disease. No one ever got called to the Captain's private study.

Niall did not want to go and every fiber of his being had told him to stop, but his duty had been called upon and so he went at a fast pace. Niall's face held full fact that he was nervous of the upcoming encounter. He did not know how to get rid of it even when he knocked on the open door frame of the Captain's private study.


"Squire Raghnall, Reporting as order, SIR!" He said coming to full attention.

Captain Degan had noted the look on niall's face and spoke softly,
"Niall, please come in and close the door. Have a seat next to me." Niall had been caught off guard by this but did as he was told sitting quietly wondering what was to come next.

"Son, I am not sure how to tell you this so i'm going to come straight out and say it. forgive me now for my bluntness, but it is something both you and I have never had to go through." Both mentor and pupil locked eyes. "Earlier this morning, your father and grandfather were on patrol in the cobalt mountains. The patrol was ambushed ... both your father and grandfather died." Captain Degan pulled out both Lakans to show his proof of what he had just said.

Niall hesitated not sure what to think or say. Was this real? He couldn't let the rational side of his brain connect with the words that were spoken. His hand went to the two Lakans and traced the pattern upon each ceremonial dagger. The first belonged to his grandfather, the second belonged to his grandfather; the patterns proved it. Tears began to well up in his eyes at everything came crashing together and his mind deciphering the events.


"But .. but ... how?" he asked lowering his head into his hands.

"The how does not matter my son. What I say to you is no consulation, but you not only lost your family; I lost my best friends. Men such as these are completely irreplacable. We are less fo rnot having them around. Just know their lives served with great honor, and your task is to honor them in life and death so that their souls can smile down proudly upon you. I will leave you to your grieving. Take your time; you can stay in private as long as you like. But after you have mourned, it is time to respect them in burial ceremony and look to the future. That is the Syliran Knight way."

Captain Degan rose from his chair and headed to the door. Before opening it, he turned his head to speak one last time. "Ask anything of me from here out, and I will help. That is my offering to you. I cannot replace your family but will treat you like a son in mine from here forth." Then he left closing the door behind him.

Niall spent what felt like an eternity in the private study crying over the loss of his family. He felt devistated and alone. There would be no one there for him to go to when he needed to talk, no one there for supprt or guidance. He wanted to know how this happened and the words of Captain were of no help. Knowing they were doing their duty was not good enough, he wanted to know how they died. It was clear he would never learn the truth. Something stirred deep inside him, but he ignored it for the moment. It was a raw emotion of anger he'd never felt before. It could not be let out.

Niall went back to the squire's dorm after his time in the private study. He still felt hurt and alone, but he know longer held an urge to cry. Two of his fellow squires were there and saw him enter. they had no idea what had taken place but everyone in the camp was assuming.


"Even the best get in trouble. maybe he isn't the best."

"Maybe he has been let go! Not going to be able to follow in daddy's footsteps eh?"


Something inside of Niall clicked and the suppressed rage came forth with a voice of its own. It took shape inside of him like a savage beast who only wished to kill. Niall's eyes looked to the two squires with pure evil. a power swirled inside of him that frieghtened him, but he had no control. It felt like a freedom compared to the cage of chivalry. He let the rage take control. He tried to remember what had taken place but his own conscious could only focus when three men had him held down on the ground. Laying on the ground beside him were the two squires who were making fun of him ... they both lay in their own blood either unconscious or dead.

Niall was thrown into an isolation pit by the Captain informed everyone to remain quiet or else he would release them as squires. He told Niall this occurance would never be discussed again, and he would have to control his rage or else the knights would have to send him with his father. Niall lay in the pit letting the words sink in. He wanted to be angry about the whole thing but sorrow was the only emotion that came through. He had dishonored himself and more importantly his family. Captain Degan had told Niall to live the rest of his life bringing honor to his family. The rage still stirred within him, but his desire to honor his family from here forth overcame the rage and tucked it deep in a mental box in the back of his head.

Each day in the pit, the rage came closer to getting free, and he found it harder and harder to resist. How could he honor his father and grandfather in such a state? After five days the beast stirred too close to the surface, and he grew desperate. That was when he remembered Wysar whom his father was slowly teaching him to understand. Wysar was the god of discipline whom most Akalak worshipped. Was this rage the reason why? Did all Akalak feel the rage?

Desperate, Niall fell to his knees.
"Wise and merciful Wysar. I beg you to here the prayer of a humble follower. I only know one life, the life of a Syliran Knight, the life of my father and his father. I have jepordized that through a rage which I cannot control. I have dihonored my family and myself. I am begging you to hear me. Help me control the beast inside, and my life is yours. Completely! From life and through death! I will honorably serve you. Please! Can you help?"
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Re: [FlashBack]A Desperate Plea (Gossamer please)

Postby Gossamer on August 31st, 2009, 9:17 pm

There was a weave through the world... an energy that touched all things. The Ukalas was the life supply of both the living and dead, connecting all things in a complex web of interdependence that very few mortals understood. But for some reason, when men prayed using the power of their minds and hearts, their connection to the Ukalas strengthened. For the children of Wyser and Akajia, that was doubly true for the dark skinned Akalak had a deeper understanding than most of how the world worked. It was not that they fell like the Ethaefal, or that they came from the very earth itself like the pycon. It wasn't that they existed beyond death like ghosts or that they existed outside of life like the Nuit. Instead, they simply walked with one food within the Ukalas more so than any other mortal being. The race was a great example of those that missed being Alvina as a whole by nothing more than chance luck and the dilution of their bloodlines. Some scholars, especially in the university of Zeltiva claim that the Akalak don't have females among their race for that very reason - they are instead forced to reply on other races to find love and reproduce with. The very fact alone keeps their bloodline diluted down past the level of Alvinan God Children and closer on par with other races that are more fully mortal.

That didn't mean the Akalak were without gifts. Their incredible insight, depth of clear thinking, discipline, and incredible physical strength gave them advantages other races simply don't enjoy. But to level it off and bring them back on par with the remainder of the world, life handed the their second darker natures. It was this one particular nature that had driven Niall into the situation he was in. A gift from Akajia, the darkness in all Akalaks kept them from truly eclipsing the other mortals of Mizahar and leveled the odds more fully making sure the Akalak didn't overrun the world with their superior strengths of will.

Instead, they dispersed, spreading out to all regions from their home in Riverfall and melding into multiple societies - strengthening them and adding an element of the unknown that always tempered their pathways with caution.

Niall was no exception. Even in the darkness, alone, he never truly was. There was another man inside of him. The man wore his face, had his same eyes and even his identical penetrating stare. But he was not the same. The man deep within Niall that rose occasionally was darkness incarnate, restraint unfettered, wildness incarnate. The man within the squire was lust unbridled, passion inflamed, a person who put needs first over wants and let his rage rule his good common sense. The Akalak were never free of their inner demons. And sometimes, as they grew older, the inner voices got more powerful more insistent, and sometimes they even lost control. In more extreme cases, they lost everything... even their precious control - sometimes even permanently.

Nialll had just experienced one of those traumatic first emergence days before when his rage had flared up and the squire had went down. Sure some of the Akalak had their alter egos come out as children during emotional upheavals, but by and large they controlled them. Some, like Niall, had been in the perfect state to let someone else think - someone else act - while his more dominate nature grieved. It was a dirty trick, and a situation that should have never happened. But Niall wasn't among the men of his race. Had he been, they would have recognize the vulnerability of his emotional state, and safeguarded his psyche even more closely due to the vulnerability. Instead, all Niall had of his people lay in the palms of his hands... his grandfather and father's lakan. Degan should have realized the situation, but he himself was overwhelmed with grief to loose the men as well and was busy controlling his own darker side.

It was natural though for him to follow up Nialls punishment the way he did. It was an Akalak response to an Akalak problem.

And it was within the pit that Niall turned to the one thing that was bigger than his dual nature, and far more powerful than a single man could ever be - even one with the blood of two gods flowing through his veins. Niall appealed to Wysar, and the father of the Akalak heard him. He instinctively knew that his problem was larger than he himself was ready to handle at that time. And although he'd just lost a sire, he still had a father that was more than willing to listen. It was then that Wysar came to him, following the weaves of energy on The Ukalas - pulling himself from the world of the Gods to the world of men so that he could speak to his son.

The god was no surprise to Niall. Neither was he a stranger. Niall, while not a frequent visitor of Riverfall and been to the ancestral home of the Akalak enough to know that Wysar walked the halls there frequently - with and without Akajia at his side. Of all the people save for perhaps the Konti, the Akalak men were well known to their gods, and the gods to them. Wysar was there, suddenly, pooling out of the darkness in a soft glow of blue energy before the darkness encroached around him once more, swallowing his midnight blue skin and making him one with the dark of the pit. He stepped forward, and laid a gentle hand on Niall's shoulder. Pale eyes met almost identical eyes as the god smiled at the young Akalak.

"It sounds as if you are ready to talk, Niall. I'm here to answer some of your questions and offer you a direction if I can. It is not easy for you, growing into adulthood here so far away from the whole of your kind. You have unique challenges, walking the path laid out in Sylir's honor. But you are going to be very good at what you do - if you master your second nature, understand it, and give it enough free rein so it does not strangle you when you are alone and vulnerable. Being Akalak isn't about suppressing that which you have no control over, but it is more about discipline and knowing what it is you should be controlling. So let us speak, Nialll, of whatever is in your heart. You have my ear and whatever comfort I can offer." He said gently, boldly, hand still on Niall's shoulder.
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Re: [FlashBack]A Desperate Plea (Gossamer please)

Postby Niall Raghnall on September 2nd, 2009, 3:21 pm

Niall remained on his knees and was struck in humble awe as the blue light energy appeared out of no where. First but a speck and then growing until the blue energy was through out the room. Out from the center of the light walked his father. Not his father of birth who had raised him, but the father of his racial creation, his divine father. He was beyond glorious, he was a beacon of shimmering virtue.

The sheer emotional weight of being in the presence of Wysar was more than he could handle and tears welled in his eyes and rolled down his cheeks. It was an overwhelming feeling of shame, for he had not only dishonored his father and grandfather, he felt as if his actions had dishonored Wysar himself. Would this bring forth a punishment? He was ready for any consequences.

When Wysar spoke, Niall's attitude instantly changed. His shame grew into love much like a child's love for his father. Wysar did not come to punish but to nurture. His words were soothing and placed Niall at peace. His very words radiated honor and respect. Niall could not have pulled away had he tried with all his might. The appearance of and sound of his divine father had him hooked like a fish.

Wysar told him that surpressing his inner self was not the akalak way. The beast within would always be there and the relationship should be sembiotic. Niall was trying to control the uncontrollable when instead he should be controlling those things which bring out the beast. But how? Could it be placed on a leash and used to his advantage? Had he grown up and lived in riverfall, he might know these answers already. But they were lessons not taught to him by his father.


"My Gracious Father, I have so many questions I want to explode." He said with a childish joy. "But the one that seems to hang on my life is the beast within. I wish to understand the discipline within that helps me to manage the emotions which bring forth my second nature. Not just to know it like a scholar knows a book, but to have that knowledge resonate within my very soul. As if walking the path of righteousness.

My one hearts true desire is to bring honor to my family. Not only my phyisical family who now walks your halls in the heavens, but also my spiritual family. You, my divine father. I want to be a name spoken synonimously with righteousness. Not for personal glory, but for hope in others.

I want to be a feared and respected warrior who fights for the just and needy. A warrior that people say, 'There Goes Niall Raghnall, he walks with Wysar!'"
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Re: [FlashBack]A Desperate Plea (Gossamer please)

Postby Gossamer on September 14th, 2009, 7:25 pm

Wysar nodded and stepped closer, laying a hand firmly on Niall's shoulder. His eyes, which were a deep resonant color, met Nialls, and he nodded before releasing his grip. "There are things you must know, Niall. First and foremost, the creature within you is not a beast, but a very real person with a very real personality. You must learn his name, and to understand him better, you must get to know him. For without understanding, there can be no controlling him. Walling him away, ignoring him, suppressing him only gives him strength. It has been what you have been doing all these years - and it is why he has emerged so suddenly and so strongly. You do not know him, and he himself is a stranger within. Therein lies the problem. To control something, you must understand it, Niall. You must embrace it rather than reject it. These are things your father would have taught you as you got older, because to the young, the dark brother within is not an issue. But as you grow, he makes himself more known. You must get to know him to understand his needs and what can control him. You must release him in controlled ways so that your emotions and his do not get so built up." The God of Discipline said softly.

"To be Akalak is to understand that the dark brother within has a purpose and a message. You must understand each. For when a balance is struck, it will be he that can see you through the darker times, and indeed carry out that which you might not always find tasteful." He said, breathing deeply and then gesturing upwards towards the light at the rim of the pit. "Lord Degan is not the sort of knight who would lock someone in a pit to face their inner demons alone, now is he? But Lord Degan is not just Degan. He is someone else as well, someone who knows you need to face this and someone who sympathies with that which you have suppressed inside. Truthfully, Niall, the conversation you should have is indeed not with me, but with him.. the dark brother within." The God said, then paused, letting Niall absorb this knowledge and digest it for himself.
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Re: [FlashBack]A Desperate Plea (Gossamer please)

Postby Niall Raghnall on October 1st, 2009, 7:36 pm

There were a few things said by Wysar that brought about a small sense of satisfaction. The foremost being the idea that this dark half within him was really his brother. Was this the twist on the gift given the Akalak by Akajia? That they were not destined to be an only child, but a twin to share the same skin? Alone, each half was restricted; the good side was held by honor while the dark side was held by the law; and yet together they might be able to accomplish most anything. There was a level of satisfaction to that thought so long as he could maintain true control. Even Wysar said it was a must to release the dark brother in controlled ways to work towards the benefit of good.

Niall wondered why his father or grandfather had not taught him of this dark brother within him. It seemed so strange that niall had neared the age to begin life on his own and yet still felt as if he knew so little. He was training to become a great fighter and had good instincts when scouting the lands for the knights. He had been receiving good marks on all his lessons for schooling. He was not the best in any one thing, but to add them up as a whole, Niall felt he was one of the best. All he tried to do was asborb everything taught to him both physical and mental. Yet he felt like a child seeking his father's approval. Was this part of the loneliness that the akalak felt? Had he grown up with his own people, would he still feel this way?

They were questions not really meant to be answered. Right now he had learned from the deity of the Akalak people that he was a twin. That his other half lived inside of him and had been held down by his own conscious because he knew no better. What did his brother desire in life? Could they achieve their own goals in unity under the same body? What was his name? The first two questions held no answer but instinctively he knew the answer to the third. Niall knew the name of the dark brother within. He'd always known it. it was the name he used when he played heros and mosters as a kid. it was the name of his sidekick when they defeated the dragons in their mountain liars. They were always together.

Niall closed his eyes and spoke out loud so that Wysar could hear what was going on,
"Iwyn, my Dark Brother, are you there? Come to me that we might meet for the first time."
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Re: [FlashBack]A Desperate Plea (Gossamer please)

Postby Gossamer on October 7th, 2009, 8:07 pm

It was clear that in his own right, Niall was starting to understand. For many of the Akalak, it wasn't just about teaching their sons that they had a second soul inside their body, for that is hard to explain without an awakening. But when the second soul awakens, it was an easy step, a gentle shove to give them the tools to understand what they truly were inside. As Niall closed his eyes, Wysar gestured, and the small circular pit changed from that of a prison to Niall's own chamber. His chamber was a simple one, a single room within Stormhold, that housed a bed, desk, armor and weapons rack, a comfortable hearth, a wingback chair, and most importantly and mysteriously to Niall... a full length mirror.

It was before this enormous full-length mirror that Wysar took them both while Nialls' eyes were closed. Naming his bother, reaching into himself and pulling forth an invitation to meet was a huge step, and one that opened a door in Nialls mind and let Iwyn come forth. Niall could feel the shift, and feel suddenly that he was not alone.

Wysar reached out and touched Niall's shoulder. "My son... open your eyes and meet my other son." If Niall did so, he'd find himself staring into the eyes of a stranger standing before him in the mirror. Oh, it was his face and body alright, but there were subtle differences that only someone used to walking around in their own skin could see. The image in the mirror offered him a tentative if a bit cruel smile, and spoke. Niall could feel his lips moving on his face, but they weren't moving of his own volition. "Greetings warrior. It is... about damn.. time you acknowledged me." The voice said, anger infusing it and the rage clearly evident in the others eyes. There was a darkness there, a cruel lightless shine that echoed forth. "There is a reason they say windows are the mirrors of souls. For it is only through them we can truly talk like other men can. And while I do not know about your preference, mine is for a face to face discussion. I don't necessarily settle for being a voice in your head." Iwyn said, smiling coldly.
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Re: [FlashBack]A Desperate Plea (Gossamer please)

Postby Niall Raghnall on October 7th, 2009, 10:12 pm

Niall left his eyes closed unaware that Wysar had pulled him to his room and stood him before a full length mirror. There was a strange fear that over came him, not bad and not good - exhilerating, that kept him from opening his eyes until that precise moment that Wysar told him it was okay. This did not happen before Niall could feel the presence of a third standing with them.

"My son... open your eyes and meet my other son."

The words were enticing much like a full glass in the hands of an acoholic who'd had one to many already. The desire is there to put it down but the body does not know how to resist. Niall opened his eyes and blinked a few times to get his bearings about him. The idea that he was staring into a mirror was not what he'd expected. It was within that very first moment that he realized he was but was not looking at himself. It was an all together strange moment.

The individual was pleasant and yet something about him felt twisted ... dark. He spoke with a cruelty in his voice and his eyes looked like pure rage. The words spoken to Niall were as if he knew all along who Niall was. That part did not sit well with him.


"Until now, Iwyn, how was I took acknoweldge that which I did not know. You have the advantage over me if you have been aware. I merely thought my moral direction had been off course." Niall replied cautiously. He was excited to know he was meeting his inner twin for the first time but was completely aware that this twin was as dark in life as Niall was good ... complete opposites.

"It is indeed much easier to speak to you when their is something to speak at. The fact that you are not a voice in my head means I am not going mentally crazy." This was still to be determined but Niall felt confident he was a sane man.

"How long have you known? Been aware that we both exist within the same body?"
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Re: [FlashBack]A Desperate Plea (Gossamer please)

Postby Gossamer on October 8th, 2009, 7:51 pm

The figure staring at him in the mirror looked thoughtful. It was odd, somehow, that the pair had never met in such a fashion. If Niall had ever been to Riverfall, he'd understand intimately now why they sometimes called it "The City of Mirrors and Pools." Strangers didn't, but the dark twins, when faced with glass or still water could somehow be together in ways they never could otherwise. Having grown up in Syliras and its outlying areas, Niall was without this benefit, and that was perhaps one of the reasons his father and grandfather never revealed his darker nature to him... he never asked. Perhaps they were waiting for him to realize there was someone else within his skin along side him. Or perhaps they simply were so used to their darker halves the thought never crossed their mind to ask if he'd been properly introduced.

Such was the burden being raised outside of your own.

"I've known since I was born, since we both were. I am everything you are... and have experienced everything you have. Even the loss of our fathers, and of our grandfathers."
The way Iwyn said it made Niall realize something immediately. He did indeed just loose two fathers and two grandfathers. One set known, the other set unknown. "We are very.. personal, but in the more... aged Akalak, we move fluidly between one another. It is accepted, known even, that to talk to one is to talk to the other. Yet... you have never spoken to me. I've been speaking to you the whole time... all our lives. But not once have you answered back. Why? Ignorance is no excuse!" There was rage in Iwyns eyes... so very different now, that Niall actually looked, than his own.

"Are you ready to share? Your life? Your thoughts? All of it?"
He asked, no demanded, his words harsh even in Nialls own ears.
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Re: [FlashBack]A Desperate Plea (Gossamer please)

Postby Niall Raghnall on October 9th, 2009, 3:23 pm

This became a moment Niall would never forget. Not only because he'd met his dark twin for the first time, but because he had learned HOW to communicate with his sibling. It was strange and exciting, fearful and horrifying all at the same time. Why had his father never told him that all Akalak held two souls within themselves? Seemed like a big detail to leave out of a conversation. It was also a question that would never be answered, so he decided not to spend time pondering it. What was taking place was the beginning; not the end.

The words spoken by Iwyn struck him hard. Iwyn had known and felt everything from the beginning, and yet Niall had known nothing. It was easy to understand how angry Iwyn must have felt; trapped inside a jar and no one knew. It was the kind of thing that could drive a man insane. Was Iwyn insane? Instantly he felt as if Iwyn knew the question being asked and changed his thought process. Niall realized that his father and grandfather were the same parental figures of Iwyn. This thought only brought more sadness. If his family also had dark twins, whom did Iwyn consider his parents?


"Had I known there were two of us inside this body, I would have not thought that I was crazy and would have answered you. You want to claim ignorance is no excuse except you know what I think; my feelings and experiences. You are simply pissed off because I did not know. Would it anger me to be trapped with no one to know I am there? Absolutely. But it doesn't give you the right to blame me." Niall spopke to Iwyn directly but with out anger. He was not trying to make his darker half blow his top. He was merely trying to show he w ould not be pushed around.

The remaining questions that Iwyn asked were more so out of anger, and Niall almost chose not to respond to them. But he knew to ignore Iwyn would only build up his rage. He had to learn how to keep his twin in check. Egging him on or ignoring him only made things worse. "It is what it is, Iwyn. There is no 'ready for it'. There is merely acceptance, and that I have.

Why not talk about things that matter instead of bickering. What goals do you have? What would you like to see accomplished in this life? Now that we both are aware, it is time we learned how to work together, don't you think?"
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Re: [FlashBack]A Desperate Plea (Gossamer please)

Postby Gossamer on October 9th, 2009, 5:20 pm

"Most people don't need to be told, Niall. Most people simply know. Yet you grew up among these humans... acting human. You are not. You are an Akalak! We are twice together what they are singularly. Forgive my rage, but I have always spoken to you. I have always guided you. I have always offered my opinion... and now... just now... you acknowledge it? And it took the Father of our Fathers to show you? Forgive my rage, but yes... I am angry. My question... my real question... is how could you NOT HAVE KNOWN! Had you simply asked... simply mentioned it... to our fathers, to our grandfathers... or even asked me ONE SIMPLE QUESTION - WHO ARE YOU? I think you would have found out a long time ago. But you never asked... not them, not me... perhaps they wanted to spare you the embarrassment if you were the one in a thousand Akalak born with no twin... half a man... half a soul..." The figure in front of the mirror was darkening in rage, his eyes fiery, his breath coming in heaves.

"It gives me every right to blame you. Are you not a thinking creature? Or are you a mindless spineless human like the rest of them here? You are Akalak, and yet you don't even know what that means!"
Iwyn said, reaching up with Niall's hand and stabbing the mirror, as if to poke his own chest forcefully with the digit. "Own it, Niall. You are the dumbest of the dumb. There has never been a bigger idiot alive. YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE CRAZY because you didn't educate yourself about who you are. YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE CRAZY because you were too SCARED to ask questions." The figure reflected in the mirror burst out laughing suddenly - a big booming jovial sound. The eruption of noise seemed to startle even the stranger in the mirror, who blinked, then grinned.

"Its almost worth it, knowing all the secret fear your harbored as a boy because you weren't brave enough to ask the questions of a man."


The man froze, tilted his head slightly, flashed a grin and then reached up to stroke Nialls chin. "I'd like a cold ale, a willing wench, and a bath since you got our ass thrown in that nasty pit for being yet again an idiot. Beyond that, you ride like crap, you drop your guard when swinging your sword, and I aim to fix that." He said with a grin... and an expression that clearly stated 'So how do you like them apples?'
Gossamer

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