It seemed no matter how their emotions twisted, they always ended up exactly where they were now. Kissing each other as if it was the end of Mizahar. There had been numerous times when some kind of negative emotion had rifted between them, and yet Rinya found herself wrapped up in him. For once he didn’t tell her that she didn’t have to apologize to him—he just kissed her back and muttered that he loved her. The whole night had flipped them around, and really she couldn’t think of a better way to unwind. Of course one thing almost always led to another…
Jorin shifted and it took Rinya a moment to notice they were lying down. He refused to loosen his grip however, and there wasn’t any space between them. Considering how she had shoved him away, it was a drastic change. But the kissing most certainly did not stop. Without much room to move, Rinya simply focused her efforts on feeling him. Unfortunately for her, much like Jorin’s anger, they were burning too quickly through each other, they weren’t focused enough on a steady route. Rinya finally had to pull herself away from him with a groan, gasping for breath.
She could barely hum in acknowledgment when Jorin said her name, eyes closed and face pressed into his collarbone as she tried to reassemble her thoughts. For a moment she didn’t quite understand what he meant by another person being in the condo with them—surely one of them would have noticed that a long time ago. The more he forged on however, the stiffer she became in his arms. It would have been easy, to get angry at him for bringing Farline up yet again. She already knew where that petching woman belonged—the fact he kept bringing her up was starting to worry her a little.
Why it was so hard for him to excise Farline from himself she would never understand—at least not fully. But much to her own bitterness it was still hard to accept that Jorin had actually loved that woman. It would have been difficult for her if Jorin was like Farline. Falling in love with him only to be thrown out by him when he grew bored. But in that same vein—Rinya wasn’t like Jorin. She fought back, and hated it when people stepped over her like she was insignificant. Hate wasn’t something she generally did, but when she did do it… Rinya could be very commited.
The fact the woman tried to play them against each other wasn’t surprising. After the way Rinya had thrown the ‘humiliation’ in her face—or perhaps that was before? It didn’t actually matter in the long run. Rinya knew that Farline liked to poke at Jorin’s weaknesses… costing him his job was one of them. But the fact she had actually done this to him at Beautyfest… She wasn’t sure if Farline played the game to simply win, or just as an excuse to be cruel. After all despite everything—Jorin never actually wronged Farline. Her excuse to make his life a living hai simply because of her… Apparently everything Farline found as low she couldn’t actually distinguish in herself.
”I know it’s not a fear I can fix…” Rinya sighed. At least not completely. There were some things that ended up so deeply ingrained into a person that it was just part of who they were. Though Rinya wasn’t happy of the slightest comparison to her and Farline. While yes tonight there had been thought of how to handle their situation—Rinya would have tried to make it work first. Unless Jorin had been the one to back out. Unconsciously Rinya ran her fingers down between them until the rested across her favorite part of him. Feeling his heart beat beneath her fingers.
How did she tell him he was more than good enough? He was trying so hard to rationalize right now that she wouldn’t have even loved him if he wasn’t good enough. He was more than good enough, but Rinya knew no matter how many times she said it—he’d still feel it. The pain and fear from him twisted in her stomach hard and Rinya shook her head slightly. ”You’ve said it before Jorin. That we were meant to be together. There isn’t anyone ‘better’ for me than you—if nothing else tonight just proved that.” He tried to something completely against the grain of his thinking for her—even if his stubbornness came from wanting to protect her.
”We belong together. Being good enough… she can argue with me until she’s blue in the face—or bleeding for that matter—about all the things she says you’re not.” Rinya wished she could see his face. She wanted to be able to look him in the eye when she said this to him, but there wasn’t much choice. ”Maybe you aren’t the tallest male. Or the strongest. But I don’t need someone just… physically strong. Riches don’t mean anything to me—I’ve lived in the woods and been completely happy.”
Sliding her free hand across his skin until she reached his face, she mimicked his motions from earlier, stroking his face. ”I need someone gentle. Who can forgive my temper, and understand that I can’t always say what I mean. I don’t just want you Jorin. I need you. I don’t just… survive anymore. I live.” Rinya gave a small shrug. The words were nowhere near as flowery as Jorin’s. He always managed to put their love into poems, though she didn’t think he realized it.
Her words were just facts. Completely true, but they seemed to fall flat to her ears. But she didn’t resist his second kiss. Like she had just told him—she didn’t just want—she needed this.