Closed Something New

[Khara]

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She didn't regret asking the question in the slightest, asking rarely was a bad thing if you were around someone who was more than happy to answer your questions. The explanation though, was far beyond her understanding. The basics seemed to be there but there was a big difference in understanding what was said and understanding all what it meant. It was just like Zhol had said at the start, complicated.

It did give Khara a lot to consider though, which helped take her mind off of being a bit trapped in the stall with Smoke. Okay, so she wasn't trapped, but it wasn't like they were just out in the open either. Maybe that's what made her so nervous. Either way, Zhol's gentle guidance and then far more detailed than expected answer to a question she thought was simple was more than enough to ease the last bit of nerves from her as she continued to run the brush along Smoke's fur.

"So, Smoke is like one of the Elders? But with the horses?" She questioned, a gentle cant of her head accompanying the return of her curiosity at Zhol. "They're the only ones around that have white hair. Well, except Dru. But hers is different."

Khara wasn't certain how fast it was that horses aged or even how old they could get. One thing was for certain, the number of Inarta with greying hair in Wind Reach were few in number and were looked upon with a great deal of respect no matter what their caste had been when they had been younger. It made her look upon the mare with a new bit of respect, even if her logic may have been a bit flawed.

She lowered the brush away from Smoke's side and gently ran her free hand down along the mare's fur in a long slow pat. "Sorry I was frightened of you," she uttered softly. Khara wasn't certain why she had chosen to speak in Nari at that moment, it wasn't like she was trying to hide any understanding from Zhol, but for some reason it simply felt right.

"Nari" | "Common" | "Pavi"

[Zhol]

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The idea of horse Elders amused Zhol no end; he tried to imagine how they might act, wondered what sort of wisdom such animals would be consulted for by the other horses. He supposed that if there were Elders in the stables though, Smoke most certainly would be one: wise, patient, a stable temperament that had experienced so much that there was nothing left to surprise her.

"Quite the special old girl," he muttered, offering Smoke a warm smile and another grateful nose rub.

Zhol turned his attention to Khara, his grin broadening, still plenty of smile to go around. "I think she likes you," he assured, not so enthusiastically that it would seem like he was trying to reassure a frightened child, but still with plenty of positive reinforcement in his voice. It was good to see her slowly beginning to relax; perhaps it was selfish of him to want so badly for Khara to be comfortable with this part of his life, but it felt too important to not try; too much a part of who he was and what his life was for him to bare the thought of Khara not somehow being part of it. Three familiar words welled up inside him as he looked at her, desperate to be spoken, but he kept them contained for now, the gaze that had caught sight of Khara and refused to look away left to do all the talking.

A contented sigh escaped from him as he thought of the times before when they'd been here, Khara loitering a safe distance away as they talked, as nervous about being around him as she was being around the horses. Zhol had always thought it was just her anxiety over saying the wrong words in front of an Avora; he'd always imagined it would be the same way with anyone else; but it was and wasn't in equal measure. There had always been something more, and now everything but that something had fallen away; to stand here, so close to Khara, knowing that every look and smile and urge to brush her cheek or plant a gentle kiss on her lips as not just acceptable, not just okay, but actually wanted? Even with vocabulary from four different languages, Zhol didn't have enough words to explain how happy that made him.

"You're really good at that," he added, allowing himself to take a few steps closer, his eyes finding hers and being ensnared forever, a hand resting gently on Khara's waist, an unspoken wish to feel her hands moving across his body with the same careful intent with which they'd brushed across Smoke. Suddenly he didn't care about horses, or cherry groves; suddenly his bed seemed too long ago, and too far away; suddenly all his gentle patience, all his willingness to wait, all his understanding and empathy felt like chains, holding him back from the urge to let his fingertips roam across what baths and misunderstandings had inadvertently allowed him to glimpse for a split second and memorise for eternity. His head lowered to hers with all the speed of a glacier. If he could just kiss her, just fumble with the fastenings, cast aside her clothes, give in to everything rattling around in his mind and chest like caged animals -

The kiss that settled against her lips was the barest of brushing contact, as light and delicate as a butterfly landing on a leaf; as persistent and passionate as a torrential summer storm. The only concession to his urges, the only extra liberty he allowed himself to take, was the way that his hand subtly shifted, sliding around her waist to the small of her back, guiding Khara's body against his, sneaking beneath the seam of her clothes to brush against the soft and warm of her skin.

His eyes stayed closed, his forehead resting against hers, his words escaping him in barely more than a breath.

"Gods, Khara," he whispered. "I love you so much."

"Pavi" | "Common" | "Nari" | "Symenos"
Dad Thoughts | Dinah Thoughts | Khara Thoughts
...
This template was made by Khara. She has failed this city, and will soon be visited by a sexy man in a hood.

[Khara]

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"I... I... " Words were lost, fumbled for but never quite made it from breathless lips as Khara tried to calm the storm within her mind that he had caused.

It was a war plain and simple, between several sides all of which were equally compelling. First, and the one Khara desperately didn't want to win, was the one that wanted to pull away, the one that threatened to bring tenseness to muscles that would have liked nothing more than to melt at the gentle touch against her back. It had gained a foothold when he had first placed a hand on her waist and was still clinging, challenging the other sides on its road to victory with taunts and screams. The other sides of the little mental battle were having none of it, though. One beckoned her to toss her arms around his shoulders and pull him into another kiss, caring nothing for where they ended up or who may have seen, entirely disregarding any notion of what was proper. It was loud, passionate, but so very unlike her that all it managed to do was contain the more negative of its opponents.

Which left the third to shuffle slowly to the forefront of her mind and make a break for it, leaving aversion and lust behind as it flooded her senses. It had all the want of the second without the desperation and caused only the slightest of movements as Khara lifted one of her feet to her toe to gain more height so she could gently bring her lips to his. A tick or two passed, far too long for the one side of her that was quickly being forced to silence again, and far too short for the other that was also retreating into the recesses of her mind.

The timid winner only got so far as letting her reach up to gently place her fingertips against his cheek. A soft "And I you," uttered before she slowly pulled away, her golden eyes opening to seek out his.

"Wh-what caused that?" Khara asked, still as breathless as she had been at the first attempt to speak. It was a silly question, really. His words had been more than enough to give reason for his actions and she felt as though her reply was pale in comparison. Redness began to threaten to creep across the skin of her cheeks as she waited for an answer she didn't really need.

"I did not do anything so special, only what you showed me." An impish smile crept it's way onto her features as her arms wound around him. As she spoke her tone was kept light, playfully teasing in nature rather than anything truly serious. "I am starting to think you do not really wish to go anywhere. You are trying to distract me, aren't you? Do you really think I will be so bad at riding a horse?"

"Nari" | "Common" | "Pavi"

[Zhol]

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A lopsided grin blossomed slowly onto his features. Yet again Zhol's eyes found themselves ensnared by Khara's, and he had no desire to even attempt the futile task of tearing his gaze away.

"You were the one who said I could distract you like that any time I wanted," he teased back, his thumb gently caressing across the skin at the small of Khara's back. His heart heaved in his chest, nudging at him, urging him to kiss her again and not to stop. His teeth teased at his lower lip, tongue flitting across, wishing that Khara's kisses could be the only thing it tasted for the rest of time. He felt giddy, and weightless, as if even the tiniest speck of more happiness would be enough to make him float clean off the ground. He almost clung tighter to Khara at that thought; if he was going to drift away then he would make sure she came with him. If he spent even a single second away from her arms, away from the feel of her hand on his cheek, it would be an eternity too long.

"But if I did it as much as I wanted," he continued, a timid embarrassment creeping into his voice, not reluctant to admit the truth, but perhaps a little shamed to reveal just how far and hopelessly he had fallen, "There wouldn't be any space left for breathing."

It was agony as he dragged his eyes away, as he forced them to close, his lids restraining his gaze as he aimed them anywhere, not quite able to stop himself from sneaking one last kiss against Khara's forehead this time, before he achingly tore himself away and took a step backwards. His hand was the most reluctant part of him to move; as he wrenched it from Khara's back it still lingered against her, ghosting across her waist, her elbow, her arm, until it managed to snare itself around her fingers.

"You're right though," he conceded. "We're meant to be going places, and I don't think Smoke is going to be too happy with us if we stand around smooching in her stall all day."

His other hand ran across his face, as if it could somehow wipe the thoughts and wants and tingling residuals that kissing Khara had left behind. At last he found himself forced to let go of her completely, turning just enough to snag the saddle blankets from where they were draped. He hesitated as he turned back, a slight flush of colour tugging at his cheeks as a thought crossed his mind. He almost didn't say it, focusing his attention on settling the thing, padded fabric over Smoke's broad back, but he forced himself to. Nothing unspoken between them anymore: that was the promise they'd made each other.

"When you touch my cheek like that?" he said, even more colour rushing to his face. He forced himself to glance in Khara's direction, mustered a nervous smile. "I really like that."

"Pavi" | "Common" | "Nari" | "Symenos"
Dad Thoughts | Dinah Thoughts | Khara Thoughts
...
This template was made by Khara. She has failed this city, and will soon be visited by a sexy man in a hood.

[Khara]

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Khara hand followed Zhol's, fingertips curling inwards after they slipped from his grasp as if trying to capture the feeling. As he set about settling the blankets in place on Smoke she quickly looked about for other things she could do to help. First was the brush she had apparently dropped when he had kissed her, quickly picked up and put back wfhere she had watched Zhol take it from in the first place.

She found herself fighting the urge to step out of the stall, an effort to stay out of the way as much as give in to the desire to ease the lingering discomfort of being so close to one of the horses. Her more stubborn of thoughts were making some rather compelling arguments with the fact that she was soon going to be sitting atop the animal so she had best get used to being near the mare when Zhol spoke up again.

"Y-you do?" Her eyes briefly met his, the hint of embarrassment he showed echoed on her own features. Khara couldn't help but wonder if he had picked up on her ongoing inner struggles and had made the confession in an effort to redirect her thoughts, or if it was simply something that Zhol felt he needed to say, either way she appreciated the effect, the sentiment, and the small bit of knowledge it gave her.

Despite the urge to instantly touch him again, Khara felt her own words echoing in her head about avoiding their plans. Instead her hand reached out and bushed softly against his before she took hold of part of the blanket and helped smooth it out into place.

A small laugh came to her as she glanced back to him. "Smooching? That's a funny sounding word," A stray thought was kept to herself, a joke of Zhol making up words in Common that she had never heard. She didn't care if he made them up or not, if he did then even better as they would be only words that they would know.

"Is there anything else we need to do?" She asked with a quick look around despite having no knowledge of exactly what she was looking for.

"Nari" | "Common" | "Pavi"

[Zhol]

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There were times when the residual knee-jerk reaction to clamp his mouth shut and not say the first thing that came to mind proved useful. In the past, it had been what had prevented him from accidentally revealing the extent of his affection for Khara; but now, it proved useful at stopping him saying anything unwise - in this instance, a suggestion that the anything else that they needed to do was to find a quiet corner where they could curl up together, and forget that the rest of the world existed.

"I'll handle this part," Zhol replied, scooping the bridle from where he'd balanced it over the frame of the stall. Carefully he manoeuvred it into position, the metal bit sliding into place behind Smoke's teeth, her ears carefully manoeuvred into position between the headpiece and the browband. With almost instinctive motions, Zhol set about tightening the various buckles, adjusting the noseband, attaching the throatlatch to hold the entire ensemble in place. With practised hands, it took a matter of moments; but there was too much room for worry there if he'd asked Khara to help, too much opportunity for her to fret that she was making things too tight or too loose.

"There we are," Zhol announced, securing the reins in place.

He turned and offered Khara a smile; reinforced it as he perceived the wariness in her body language, and behind her eyes. "The hardest part is getting up there," he reassured. "After that, it's easy. Come on - lets lead her outside, and see if we can find a mounting block to make things less tricky."

"Pavi" | "Common" | "Nari" | "Symenos"
Dad Thoughts | Dinah Thoughts | Khara Thoughts
...
This template was made by Khara. She has failed this city, and will soon be visited by a sexy man in a hood.

[Khara]

.
It was something ingrained into her very core, watching as someone did a task and wanting to learn not just for curiosity sake, but the genuine need to find some way she could help. Khara was vaguely - very vaguely - aware of all the harnesses and straps that an Eagle Rider would use, but the thing that Zhol put over Smoke's nose was entirely alien to her. It looked uncomfortable, but she knew that Zhol would never put the mare through any undue stress or cruelty.

It was only as they began leaving the stable that the last bit of what he said began to sink in. Her eyes darted from Zhol to Smoke's back and she realized just how high up it actually was. She certainly couldn't just jump up there! Tricky was an understatement.

"Why cannot you just-" The thought was cut off as her eyes fell to his injured arm and a fresh wave of guilt for the oversight came over her. It wasn't that she had forgotten. Not really.

"Zhol?" Khara began quietly, her feet halting her steps as they stepped into Syna's light. She couldn't make herself look up, instead her gaze fell to the dirt and her right hand rose to grasp just above the opposite elbow. It wasn't a polite thing to ask, but usually Zhol would say something about whatever mishap had caused an injury. His silence on the matter was a warning, she knew it, a caution against the truth. But the fact there was an unknown between them, another secret still on the fringes, threatened to gnaw at her. "What happen to your arm?"

The question couldn't have had more of an apologetic backing to it if she had tried and the quick glance she gave him threatened to bring every unspoken sorry for asking to her lips. While they never quite made it out, the rapid backtracking left her almost frantically. "You don't have to tell if you don't want to."

"Nari" | "Common" | "Pavi"

[Zhol]

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Zhol almost took her up on that offer. It wasn't that he wanted to lie to her; the notion of that twisted his stomach in knots. It was shame mostly, and fear of how disappointed Khara might be in him; not just for failing, but in having tried at all. The fear boiled into panic, and then cooled into resignation. Of course Khara would disapprove: even if she didn't think herself too insignificant to deserve it, her nature was far too gentle to leave room for acts as selfish as revenge. If she knew, she would be ashamed of him, and last night would be their only night. She would snatch her heart away, and he would find himself lost and without her.

Even so, he still felt the words, the admission, welling up inside him. Better to lose her than lie to her.

"It was when we -" He grimaced at the memory; the gut-twisting sorrow and agony that he'd felt each and every day. "- when we weren't talking. After the baths, when you -"

He trailed off. There was no need to explain what Khara had done, or what Zhol had said. It was surely burned into both their minds forever.

"I met... I mean, I was walking, and I heard... I didn't go looking, but I found -"

A deep breath, shaking as he drew it into his lungs, nervousness and anxiety making breathing and speaking a struggle. He collected himself. Focused. Forced the words out before his body had the chance to get in the way.

"The Avora who... the one who hurt you. I saw him. Heard him. He was with his friends, and he was boasting about -"

His shoulders collapsed under the strain, body crushed beneath the weight of guilt that he had so carefully bottled up and hidden from his mind. He didn't want to look at her, or at anything else but the ground, but he forced him to, forced himself to watch for the horror and judgement and disappointment that her eyes were surely about to show. He forced himself to watch Khara realise exactly the kind of man she had made the mistake of giving her heart to.

"He was bragging about you. About what had happened. And I got... I got so angry. I couldn't stop myself. I walked up, and I -" He gestured into the air in front of him, his mind's eye replaying the moment, the smug smile on the blacksmith's face; the way it melted into horror as Zhol had willed his res to spread from his hand, to coil around the blacksmith's wrist; the satisfaction and resolve that Zhol had felt as he had willed that res into fire, and heard the blacksmith's yelp of pain.

"I used my reimancy on him. Just on his arm, I didn't have time for anything else. Not before..."

He trailed off. Gestured to himself, the arm and his other scuffs and bruises indicated in one go.

"Not before his friends did this to me. I wanted to hurt the person who hurt you, but all I managed to do was prove that I am not enough of a man to protect you. The worst part is that I know you would never have wanted me to; I let my anger get the better of me, and I did it for my own selfish reasons."

His eyes fell away. "I am sorry. I failed you, and I let you down."

"Pavi" | "Common" | "Nari" | "Symenos"
Dad Thoughts | Dinah Thoughts | Khara Thoughts
...
This template was made by Khara. She has failed this city, and will soon be visited by a sexy man in a hood.

[Khara]

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"No." Although soft spoken, there couldn't have been more conviction in Khara's tone if she had tried.

The small distance between them was quickly removed as she caught up to Zhol and practically threw her arms around him. A struggled breath was taken as she pulled herself as absolutely tightly against him as she could manage. "No," she repeated stubbornly. "You haven't. You have not."

Khara forced herself to take a deep breath as she let her mind try and sort through everything he had said. It was true, what Zhol had said about her, though. She had thought about what had happened to her, come to terms with the actual fact the Avora had hurt her rather than just ordered a Chiet to do something, admitted that it hadn't been just some random liaison but rather a cruel and purposeful act that was meant to make her feel as though she was less than nothing. It was okay for her to feel as though she had been mistreated, abused, violated even - because that was what had happened.

All those admissions, however, came with the knowledge that she didn't truly wish ill upon the Avora that had done it to her. If someone had offered her a chance at revenge without any sort of consequences there was no doubt in her mind that Khara would refuse. She just wasn't like that. It didn't seem right for her to answer one wrong with another.

That didn't mean that Zhol's attempt angered or disgusted her, though. There was a reason he had acted and it wasn't selfish at all like Zhol believed it to be. She may have been incapable of such a thing, but the fact that he had done something so extreme with her in mind? There was no small amount of guilt that came with the concept that she was glad for what he had done, that some part of her wished he had done more.

"Thank you," she barely managed to whisper against him and if at all possible, she tightened her hold.

A tick or two passed and as much as she wanted to stay that way for as long as he would let her, Khara eased off just a bit, just enough so that she could look up at him and meet his gaze if he was willing. "They should not have done it. It was between the two of you. I am not the only one he hurt that day. He wronged you as well. My spirit was already yours even if you did not know; he saw to crush it."

A sigh left her before her head rested against his chest again. "You do not fail me, you do not let me down. You picked me back up, you still do."

"Nari" | "Common" | "Pavi"

[Zhol]

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It was hard for him to meet her gaze; not because he didn't want to, but because he didn't want her to see the moisture shimmering in his eyes. His resigned sadness was shattered in an instant; Khara's embrace was so tight it felt as if it would crack every one of his ribs were it any more in tense, and yet he wished that it were. He wished that she would hug him like that always; that she would cling so tight to him that her arms would forget how to let go; that he would never have to live for a second without her so close, and so his.

"I cannot promise I will not try again," he said quietly, part of him still struggling with reluctance, and the last lingering thoughts of what Khara might think, especially at the thoughts that began to flood his head. "If I see him again, I will -"

He knew exactly how that sentence ended. Night after night, he rehearsed how that sentence ended. He heard the blacksmith's taunts and struck back; not with fire this time though, with sword instead. He would feel his father's blade carve the Avora's wayward hands from his wrists, so that he would never be able to touch Khara - or anyone else - ever again. Then would come the reimancy, the burning and searing of flesh; of specific flesh, intimate flesh, to ensure that the blacksmith would never have need to touch another woman again. He would carve the blacksmith's tongue from his mouth, so that it would never utter another hurtful word. The Avora had sought to break Khara's spirit, and force her to feel less than he was; Zhol would break every part of him, until only a crippled, useless dek remained.

His thoughts changed, that flame of anger extinguished in an instant like a gust of wind against a candle. No, not a gust of wind - a breath of Khara, her body against his, the unruly inferno settling back into warm and smiling embers. "- be right here beside you," he realised, letting the fingers of his good arm brush gently across her forehead, a smile settling into permanent place on his lips.

"He may have hurt us both when we were alone; but as long as we are together, nothing will ever be able to hurt us again."

"Pavi" | "Common" | "Nari" | "Symenos"
Dad Thoughts | Dinah Thoughts | Khara Thoughts
...
This template was made by Khara. She has failed this city, and will soon be visited by a sexy man in a hood.