redemption road.

[Caelum]

It may have been in bits and pieces, but I gave you the best of me. - J. Morrison. Timestamp: 70 Summer 517 AV The night was dark and full deep with distant, cluttered stars. Light sourced itself solely from the rising crest of Riverfall, the closest any city had come to being considered home. A pair of riders waited on the height of Kabrin Road, and the larger of them was comfortably fused to the back of his horse. He used a yvas rather than a saddle and the inky current of windmarks flowing over his skin declared him, unequivocally, as belonging to the grasslands surrounding. Moonlight cast his shadow large, but his presence was far from ominous. This was a man who had done nothing but protect and defend the rightful citizens of Cyphrus, though occasionally he had been forced to do so with rope around their necks. "Are we going to the Sanctuary?" Elise swayed as her mount drew alongside that of her guardian. Her face turned south, towards that happy memory. The home of Kavala Denusk was where Else had first woken from the long nightmare of her enslavement, and where the most important stages of her healing had been conducted. "I'd like to see her." She paused and sooty hair trickled out of her crown of braids as she peeked at the sleeping konti child in her guardian's arms. "So would Lillian, Caelum." Caelum smiled. It was a good, rich expression that went grave deep. This face of his by Leth's hour was that of a long dead Drykas ankal, one who had lived and died too young in the tides of an entirely different war. He had been both a gravedigger and a healer for Riverfall before, and knew with his return he was likely to be so again. The longer he stayed, the higher the probability of the call. "Of course we're going to the Sanctuary. We will always go to the Sanctuary." The Pavi flowed seamlessly off his tongue, designed by the graceful gestures made by a single hand. It was the language he shared with the Sanctuary's keeper, a woman whose history remained impossibly tangled with his own. How many times now had he come riding back to Riverfall? Sea hauled or mud dragged, broken and beleaguered with but a single leftover hope? He had lost count. But this time? He was whole. Or whole as Caelum had ever been. His footsteps were still hounded, and he came too often as a nightmare dressed like a daydream. The gods were far from finished with his worthless hide and where he had been, where he had gone, what improbable, unfeasible, and disastrous adventure he had flung himself after this time at least had not sent him home in a sack. No, indeed. He returned with his daughter, grown by several years, and his assistant. His friend? Lover? Once, she had been his slave, though everyone who knew either of them had understood the truth of that. There were dark depths, giants blood that ran cold beneath his sun washed surface. He was never not tormented, his very body little more than a gods granted haunted house. Yet over it was something that could spark still like joy. More light lived in him now than had in a literal lifetime. He had been bettered, and like most things that come back wiser, it had been done by fire. That was the difference. He had not come back to Riverfall to heal. He had come back because it was home. Shocking to those few who knew him well. Unremarkable to strangers who had never witnessed his rises and falls in seemingly endless renaissance. The vagabond had a home, and with a wink to Elise he urged his horse toward Riverfall's gates. "But tonight we're going to Alements." Elise's laughter was caught up by the wind. It smelled of musk and summer and fistfuls of dust, all chasing towards the sea. It softened as their hooves found cobblestones, the guard at the gate an old friend. She rode behind Caelum, relearning the city with wide eyes in the shadow of her hood, and shivered with delight at the sight of their tavern on the water's edge. "Let me." Elise stepped aside, whistling softly to Caelum's mount and her own. Alements' proprietor held his sleep-heavy daughter against his shoulder, secured with one, muscled arm, while he rummaged about for a long, unused key to Alements front door. "I'll be back." Elise disappeared with their horses after unloading the bags, dropped each with a thud at the foot of the dock. The street was far from empty, Riverfall nightlife apparently unchanged from their previous residency, and Caelum earned more than a few curious glances as he turned the key in the lock and thought of Nysel. A crooked smile hooked his mouth, unaccountably compelling, and he offered a nod to the Dreamer, the Healer, and his cursed, beloved temptress, Nikali. "Welcome in," he muttered, voice wry, as he shouldered his way inside. "As always." A few moments of concentration and bright fire licked up from his fingertips, flurrying out to quicken the wicks of long cold candles. The entire building seemed to release a relieved little sigh.

[Aoren]

Heavy breaths came in and out. They were accompanied with the pounding of feet against the paved roads of Riverfall in the evening cool of a summer day. It was a common occurrence for Aoren to take an evening run when the heat of the day was not as oppressive. He received only a few curious looks but the practice didn’t seem so out of place in a city whose residents were focused on fitness. Beside him a large dog black as midnight kept pace as his long legs carried him around the city. Aoren enjoyed the focus that came with running. He wasn’t particularly fast but he was a nimble individual. In seasons of late that nimbleness had faded somewhat due to disuse but he was steadily on the path to rediscovery. As he ran many different thoughts were drifting through his head.

The Summer season had been a taxing one. Throughout the course of the days he’d felt like there was constantly someone or something over his shoulders reminding him of his past deeds. Good and bad. His emotions had been all over the place. There were days when he was absolutely driven, enflamed with his passions and then the next day he was completely overcome with the weight of his nightmares. Every mistake and every triumph seemed determined to revisit him in the span of a single season and it had left Aoren extremely confused and exhausted. The most pressing matter on his mind at the moment however, was the relationships he’d formed in the city of Riverfall.

Easing himself into a slower pace, Aoren eventually came to a walk even as Isikai continued running ahead of him for a short distance before stopping and meandering back to him. The dog rubbed against the side of Aoren’s leg to which he received a pat and a smile. Breathing heavy, the Drykas glanced at his surrounding, taking in the immaculate buildings and a well-tended greenery that was ever-present in the city. It had always amazed him how Riverfall could always be so starkly different than the other cities he’d traveled to. Though his mind drifted for a short period he returned to the subject that had prompted him to take his evening run. The people that he had met in the city of Riverfall were among some of the most endearing and meaningful to him in his life. It was for that exact reason that he’d been avoiding most of them. He didn’t know how to approach them.

For the longest time he’d been mulling over how to deal with the problem that had been presented to him. He vividly remembered the events that preceded his very abrupt departure from the city. The memories made his chest ache with a hollow pain that he couldn’t quite place. There were questions to be answered there that he wasn’t so sure he wanted to follow. What all of it meant, he still had no idea and the truth of the matter was that he’d been running away from most of it. If he was going to be brutally honest, that was what he’d been doing: running. A nudge at his hand drew his attention. Smiling, he ran his fingers through the dark fur of Isikai’s head, gently rubbing an ear between his fingers.

“What am I going to do, boy?” There were times when Aoren believed that Isikai could very clearly understand him. It was easy to believe considering how honest the dog’s loyalty was. There was the apology that he owed the owner of the Sanctuary, Kavala. The Konti woman had done nothing but open her arms to him, giving him a home, shelter, and a means of keeping his hands busy and he’d simply vanished. He had a healthy respect for Kavala. The woman was sharp minded, driven, and had a strong spirit that he greatly admired.

Then there was Caelum. At the thought of the Ethaefal, Aoren physically winced. That was a person who’s imagined anger struck him in a very different way. The two of them had been close, closer than that. They had been lovers on no small scale. Aoren had opened up to the Ethaefal on a level no one else was privileged to. In return, Caelum had given him his love and affection. There had been rough patches. The two of them were both headstrong individuals who didn’t always communicate to each other very well. But for the longest time, Aoren had been genuinely and truly happy…and then it was all ripped away from him.

Strolling over to a smooth stone wall that was roughly waist high, Aoren rest his hands on it. He gripped the stone tightly, cobalt blue eyes staring out over the water. Anger welled up inside of him. It was raw and staggering in its strength. The Drykas Healer and Seer felt robbed. He felt lost. He felt afraid. He felt so many things that he’d been overwhelmed when he’d first awakened from the trauma of the experience that he’d…run. With no real plan and no real reason other than to just get away. He hated to think of the pain and anger that must have caused in the hearts of those he’d grown close to. Sighing heavily he closed his eyes for a long stretch of time before opening them again. Staring down at the Lily on the back of his right hand he whispered to the wind.

“Where do I go from here?” It was a plea more than a prayer. Pushing away from the wall he was about to take off to continue his run when something caught his eye. At first he froze in place. Disbelief washed over him. His mouth fell slightly agape as shock and then fear embedded itself in his chest. There were lights on at Alements.

How many times had he wandered near the tavern to behold its darkened windows? How many times had he longed to walk inside of it just to smell its familiar scents? How many memories came back to him as he remembered playing with Lils, helping Elise in the kitchen and tending to a patient alongside Caelum?

Aoren took a step forward. His steps faltered and he had to catch himself before he found the strength to walk again. He approached the tavern with something akin to wonder. He stopped roughly half-way down the street from the establishment unsure whether he should get any closer. Isikai emit a bark startling Aoren out of his state of mind. Before he could stop the dog the large Bozderon-Zypherian mix bolted forward running up to the door barking and pawing at the wood. Aoren stayed where he was at. He wanted to move but his legs refused to listen.

He wanted to turn and leave. He wanted to barrel through the door. He wanted do so many things in that single moment but the only thing he could do was just stand there.

[Caelum]

Caelum squinted at the stairwell door when the noise floated up from below. "Shh, love." It was a low, drawling murmur as he finished tucking Lillian into her bedroll. All of the linens were stored with proper herbs for keeping, chasing out any adventurous bugs, but it was too late to go digging for all of the supplies he had packed carefully away before departing. Instead he had pulled the dusty sheet cover off the mattress in Lillian's old bedroom and laid out her bedroll from the traveling pack. That was how he tucked her in, with a kiss to her brow, and a lantern left dimmed on the table. It spread an old light over the sunset colored walls. The stairs clattered beneath his boots. They were broken heeled and busted because he had not stopped in his travels to bother to buy new ones. Of course, even when he was a firm resident of Riverfall he had a bad habit of walking around in near rags. Clothes weren't something he thought about, and he spent his gold on Lillian and Elise who both delighted in pretty things. "Hold on!" He called. The scratching, the low, canine whine. He envisioned one of the strays, perhaps a kelvic, who used to come by so often. He also thought of blood, of grave injuries and breath rattling illnesses that would come pounding and crawling up to his door at all hours. So he hurried, dodging the curving bar and the tables with chairs turned upside down atop them. Candlelight filled the room with pleasant ghosts, memories strung like cobwebs in the corners. He took a mental note to take a broom to those in the morning. "Yes?" The door swung open and he peered down at the dog. It did not register until after the massive, black beast had pounced on him, paws to his chest, causing him to rock back with a one-legged stagger before catching him, that recognition came. "Holy fuck. Isikai? Hey! Hey there. Good boy. Down. I said down." It came on a smoke addled chuckle and he dropped to a knee on his patio, ruffling the dogs ears and allowing his face to be licked by the beast. "Good to see you too, Fuzzbrain. Where.... Ah." Dark eyes lifted to take in the distant figure of Aoren.

[Aoren]

All of it seemed surreal. It was a fever dream. He didn’t have to believe that what was happening in front of him was real as he watched the door to Alements swing open. A husky voice exclaimed in surprise and then the silhouette of a body he knew so very well came into view. Everything came crashing into Aoren’s chest then. He felt like a fault line in his heart suddenly buckled beneath the friction of his emotions. The muscles of his jaw tightened as those dark eyes came to rest on him. Stepping carefully, Aoren moved closer. His movements were stiff. The muscles in his body screamed at him to turn and just leave but he couldn’t bring himself to listen. When finally his feet came to a stop, he was still a handful of feet away from the doorstep of the tavern.

He didn’t speak. Not at first. Aoren had no idea what he was supposed to say. The echo of memories drifted across his consciousness with more intensity as the man in front of him came into better view. The lines of Caelum’s face called to him. Though he wore the skin of the ankal long gone, Aoren knew quite well that it was still him. Though his gaze did not wander, he still remembered the trail of tattoos and windmarks that told the story of Kasb’el’s life. Taking a deep ragged breath Aoren spoke and broke the silence.

“Caelum.” His name felt like a weight in his chest. It sent a shiver down Aoren’s spine and it made him clench his jaw even tighter. The muscles along the Drykas man’s arms flexed as his hands tightened into fists. He wanted to pull Caelum into a tight embrace. He wanted to bolt like a deer caught in the sight of a hunter. He wanted to collapse to the ground and sob because it felt as though that were the only thing he could do.

Aoren did none of those things.

He merely stood there. The whisper of a hundred thoughts ghosting across his face brought only the slightest twitch and tremor to his features. The whole while, his eyes never left Caelum’s. He felt as though he were being tested. For what reason and how, Aoren did not know. It seemed his plea was heard and the Mother of Seers had given him what he wanted though perhaps not in the manner he wanted.

[Caelum]

The desires of Aoren Skycrown had never really left him. They pounded down on Caelum with the low, hissing rattle of Nikali's favored chains. It was a song only he could hear, wincing in the elflight that formed from candle and moon union. He rubbed his hand slowly, carefully, through Isikai's thick fur, centering himself in the present with the dog's easy casting of need-- affection. It was met with ease, a kiss between the hound's ears and a hug that squished the oversized pup. (Who ever said dogs didn't like to be hugged? Fools.) Then Caelum was rising, climbing up to his feet with a dusting of hands against worn leather riding pants as he took Aoren in. The expression on his face was not cool. It was reserved, however, and there was something wary around his eyes as he studied the sorcerer and sifted, link by link, through the bindings of his desires. Bolting. Embracing. Breaking. Caelum took a step back. He managed to catch himself and turn it into a graceful motion of invitation with the gesturing out of one arm, but it had not started that way. No. The Drykas was worried about what physical touch might do to him and his resolve. "Won't you come in? Damn, Aoren." And he smiled, loose and easy. It was easy, no act in that charismatic curve. He had missed the man. He had loved the man. And worried for him, dearly. "I just got home. Come in. Come on. I'll fix you something to drink." And with that he turned, curving about on a broken bootheel, to walk in that familiar, loose hipped stride through the life he had only just come back to.

[Aoren]

There was the slightest of wincing around Aoren’s eyes as Caelum cursed him. He sighed and closed his eyes rubbing his face with both hands.

“I deserved that.” His voice was still tight with emotion. The strict discipline that the Seer usually maintained to keep a reign on his feelings was being eroded. His eyes trailed after Caelum following him into the interior of the familiar tavern den. There was a moment more of hesitation before with a straightening of his back, he took one step forward. That was followed by another step until finally he was walking into the interior of Alements and into the arms of memories that was clawing their way through the mental wall that he was trying to build around them.

The ever faithful Isikai padded up to him and nudged his hand. Aoren found comfort in the touch of his fur through his fingers. He pet the dog using that simple motion as a means of anchoring himself into the here and now. There was another moment of hesitation as he searched for the right place to seat himself. Trudging up to the bar he flipped down one of the stools, sat himself down, and rest his arms atop the dusty surface. His eyes never left the man who was moving effortlessly through the interior of the tavern. How many times had he watched him do the same thing in a much different light?

With the light of the candles aiding him, he got a better look at Caelum. The man was travel worn, though in hindsight he’d always looked like he’d just wandered in from the road, but more so than normal. There was the fresh dust of a long journey on his boots. His face held the ease and the weariness that came with a long trip. That was undoubtedly strained given their current situation but Aoren could see it nevertheless. Folding his hands together in front of him, the sorcerer contemplated tugging on the strings of his djed for a moment in order to get a better look at the emotions roiling inside of his erstwhile lover. He decided against it. Whatever the course of their discussion, he didn’t want to know what Caelum was feeling beforehand. He wanted the Ethaefal to say it. To show it. Difficult as that might be.

There was a long stretch of silence as Aoren sifted through the thoughts in his head. He had no idea what he was supposed to say. Truth be told, he didn’t want to say anything at all but the logical side of him knew that wasn’t the answer to the problem in front of him. Back and forth be went, arguing with himself before finally he closed his eyes exhaling a long, almost defeated sigh. When he opened his eyes again he stared down at his hands. It was the only place he felt comfortable looking in that moment.

“I’m sorry. I know that’s not enough. I don’t feel like it’s enough.” He chewed on the inside of his cheek for a moment before continuing. “I left. Without explanation. Without warning. After…after…”

His voice trembled. Pain. Screams. Then blackness returned to Aoren’s memory. He pushed the thoughts aside.

“After what happened. I woke up. I was…I was a lot of things.” Looking up he searched for Caelum’s face. Cobalt eyes met dark brown before looking down again. “I ran. I don’t know what else to say.”

[Caelum]

Caelum raised his eyebrows at Aoren when he apologized. As the seer went on, he shook his head a little and ducked behind the bar to go fishing for anything useful and unspoiled. He listened, as well, while locating a trio of wine bottles beneath varying degrees of dust. He wiped them down slowly, with a rag he had located tucked neatly in a folded stack of them, and set them one by one, side by side on the bar in front of Aoren. The labels were twisted around so Caelum could read them, eyes moving over faded colors and worn scrawls, until eventually he located glasses. The glasses were polished next, rubbed clean with slow, painstaking care, and set onto the bar to shine again in the candlelight. Caelum was moving so slowly, by the time he had selected the nicest, most agreeable bottle of spirits, Elise was walking back in out of the night. "Aoren?" She stopped, startled, while pushing back the hood of her summerweight jacket. She too wore traveling clothes, a pair of trousers and a fitted chemise, hair tied up in a brightly colored scarf. She was sun kissed and filled out, healthy and willowy and strong now rather than pale and thin and frail. Those deep, indigo eyes of her were still the color of bruises, but maybe the worst of what had been broken in her was finally healed. Caelum closed his mouth on his response to Aoren, and smiled a bit wryly. "Yeah. It's really him, Ellie." Elise beamed. The shone off her, simply, pure joy at the sight of an old friend and she all but bounded across the bar towards them. Aoren found himself pounced in short order, thin arms gathering him up in an attempt to squish him silly as Elise laughed. "Aoren. Oh my blessed Rak'keli. Hi. How are you? How on earth did you know we were back?" Caelum squinted at this, then ducked his head and pried the cork out of the wine bottle.

[Aoren]

The silence between them was broken by a soft voice that was welcome and familiar. He turned in his seat to look at Elise. She looked well. There was a vibrancy to the woman that hadn’t been entirely there the last time he had seen her. The beginnings of it had been taking shape but there was still so much in her that had been damaged. He didn’t know the entirety of everything Elise had been through but he knew that it had left very deep, torturous scars in her that she would carry for the rest of her life. As he found himself pounced, Aoren was at first shocked. He leaned back on his stool, arms open in surprise as Elise squeezed him tight. His mouth hung open before he finally just gave in to the need to be embraced by someone familiar.

Strong arms wrapped around Elise and hugged her close. Aoren buried his face in the crook of her neck and just clung to her for a moment as he let the feeling of being so warmly hugged by a friend fall over him.

“Yeah. It’s me.” He pulled back when he was close to the edge of losing all ability to control what he was feeling. Looking Elise in the eyes, his own slightly misted, he smiled at her. It was the melancholy smile of a man who wasn’t quite sure where the future was headed but was clinging to the last shreds of optimism he had.

“I’m okay, Ellie. Still finding my way but I’m better. Stronger. Maybe not wiser but I’m here.” He shrugged his shoulders letting his hands fall into his lap as he laced his fingers together. “I didn’t. I was out for a run to clear my head of a few things and well…I saw the candlelight in the windows. Now, here I am.”

He let out a laugh that was part chuckle, part hiccup and part tremor of a sob forming in his throat. Taking a deep breath he steadied himself and took a good look at the two of them. He eyed Caelum intently as the man remained silent. When the spirits were poured he stared at his offered glass for a moment before wrapping both hands around it and sliding it toward himself. He was careful not to touch the Ethaefal knowing full well the chains that bound the man. He could only imagine what it must be like to be in Caelum’s shoes. To not only sift through his own emotions but to be sifting through the wants, needs and desires of those around him as well. In that moment, he did not envy Caelum. The moment was made less tense as Isikai lay his head in Aoren’s lap. He pet the dog taking comfort in his presence.

“Where did you go?”

[Caelum]

It said a great deal that Elise allowed Aoren to hug her. To lift her off her feet and snuggle her. That she was unfraid as the muscular, tall giant of a Drykas enveloped her with affection and she returned it, unashamed, and gave a little pat to his hair when he put her down. Her smile was impossible to put down as she bounced a little at Aoren's side and collected up her own glass. The once quiet and reserved young woman looked from Caelum to Aoren and bobbed her head in a nod. "Everywhere. A lot on the sea. Did you know that Caelum knows, like, all these pirates? It's insane. I had no idea. I thought we were going to be bloody well shanghaied and, nope, they start sharing drinks and leading Caelum down to see their friend with a spear in his leg and it's like a reunion or something. I mean, that was only part of it. We were all over the place. There was so much to do..." She trailed off as Caelum remained silent, slumping his arms forward onto the bar, listening to them, and turning his own wine glass around slowly in his hands. "What about you, Aoren?" Caelum finally asked. His words were even, his voice low. Welcoming. But careful. So careful. It turned Elise's smile a little sad, and maybe (just maybe) a little irritated too. "I thought you'd have six wives and a whole pack of pony-mad kids by now." Elise pursed her lips. "Caelum, don't be mean." "I'm not being mean. I honestly thought that." Caelum looked down at his wine, muttering that bit, and lifted dark eyes back to the seer. He couldn't look Aoren too long with all of him visibly gentling. "I hoped that, I guess, for you. Endrykas and all that it is. You'd find what you were searching for there, maybe." He hesitated. "Did you?" "Lils will be really, really glad to see you," Elise put in, squeezing Aoren's arm. Caelum took his time looking the seer over, inspecting him as a doctor might any patient. He had worried, desperately, over the man. And now he wanted to assure himself that no harm had come to Aoren on his journies.

[Aoren]

“Pirates?” Aoren looked at Elise wide-eyed. He’d traveled the seas for a short time but he’d never been so unfortunate as to encounter pirates. That they had made it out of the encounter alive and well brought with it a great deal of relief. He placed his hands on Elise’s shoulders giving her a warm smile.

“I’m sure you would have given them no end of trouble if they had tried anything.” Elise, for all that she had been through, was a woman whose spirit shone as brightly as her smile. She was by no means the strongest person that Aoren had encountered but she was determined. It had taken time. It would likely take even more time until she found her way completely again but as he’d interacted with her over the years and gotten to know her little by little, Aoren had seen it. How could he not? Caelum’s voice brought Aoren back to the present moment. He dropped his hands from Elise’s shoulders and turned his attention back to the Tavern owner.

There was a long pause as he considered Caelum. He thought on his time in Endrykas. He thought about the Sea of Grass, the dangers and wonders that it held. He could feel the sun on his face. His skin was certainly more tan than before. His featured a bit sharper and more toned, his body leaner from the life lived as it was among the Horseclans of Cyphrus. Several emotions passed over Aoren’s face and he couldn’t hide them. The bittersweet taste of receiving exactly what he had wanted and it not being what he expected embedded itself in Aoren’s soul. He looked down at the bar counter bringing his glass of wine closer until the liquid was in front of his eyes. Vaguely he could see his reflection. The man that stared back at him looked almost haunted. There was a severity to the intensity of his stare. Where once the cobalt blue of his eyes might have held an abundance of warmth, now they were colder, weary, weathered.

“What life I might have had in Endrykas is gone…” He brought the wine up to his lip taking a healthy swallow of the alcohol before setting it back onto the counter. Pain rippled in his chest at the memory of his time in Endrykas. Looking out toward the stained glass windows he didn’t meet the eye of either Elise or Caelum. “Along with any hope I might ever build something there.”

Aoren left it at that. In time, perhaps, he would go more in-depth into what he’d experienced while living among the Drykas people. That, however, was for another time.

“I found what I was looking for. Just not what I wanted.” He gave Elise a smile as she squeezed his arm. “I’ve missed Lils. I’ve missed you. All of you.”

Reaching down he gave Isikai’s head a gentle pat. Bringing the wine up to his lips again he drank carefully.

“Now here I am. Back in Riverfall trying to figure out what to do with my life and perhaps make something of myself.”