by Silvy on July 24th, 2011, 3:07 pm
Girl, Mamma Gann, Fela, which one you'd like to be called--how 'bout friend?
Honey when you live with one person it's a pretty much a marriage, ceremony notwithstanding. When you live with all those roomies, it's still a marriage. Equal pay up, equal facility time, equal food time. This means compromise. It sounds like you're doing most of the compromising.
Taking on a momma role is always rewarding when it's a mutual thing. My sweet friend, you give -too much- of yourself. Is there anything left for you to feel for yourself, or have you given it all away as mamma gann?
No, I don't think it's petty at all. Each 'little' thing is a discourtesy. Too many small rudenesses are leading to a giant frustration. You need Fela time. Relaxing pat the lovely purring kitty time, long bath, music and candles time.
When you feel a rudeness from one of your home partners, mark a check on the calender with the initial of the first name. After a week, check to see if these little marks add up to a pattern of repeated discourtesy. If it is the same thing, have a major and serious, non mamma talk with them.
From what i've seen you're a sweet, caring person, but honey you need to make time for YOU. treat your roomies like the adults they are! You are not their momma and it's rude of them to foist all their issues on you with no personal responsibility taken for their own actions.
When things get hard, simply use your mantra out loud until they understand that you're a person first, and a sweet mamma gann 2nd. something like,
"Just 5 minutes for me, or gimme a breath of my own."
Thank you for sharing your personal scrapbook with Miza and me. I wish I could take away the uglies, but it has to be done by you, to empower you.
*big big biggg hugs*
Lisa