[Laszlo's Scrapbook] If you only knew.

[Laszlo]

So I have been talking to some people quite a bit about the show Criminal Minds. It's not a very good show. The acting is subpar, the writing is contrived. The premise though revolves around understanding criminals, and I think that really appeals to me, to the point that I really enjoy the show. Even if the soundtrack is laughable. Those closest to me know of my habit for analyzing others, so it's to be expected that I'd love a story about understanding people. To a practical extent, I think this show is helping me understand a good many things that could later go toward creating a new PC with less-than-good intentions. I'm terrible at playing evil characters, but I wasn't always. I actually used to have a preference for them, but I focused too much on sadism. I think, when we're young, it's common to have fantasies that tend toward sadism, but something this painfully common grows old in a fictional setting. Psychopathy is great too, but after I read Victor's character, I knew that I wouldn't be able to pull it off that well. Narcissism, however, is a classic symptom of many "evil" people that I think does not get used enough. I often forget that creating a new character requires more than just feeling, more than desire to go a certain direction. It's about strategizing. Pyschology is not just about instinct, it's a science. I'm going to start working on character diamonds for my PCs, to help me better understand them. And, if I work toward an evil character in the future (Ifran may inspire me to do this), I'd like to focus on narcissism. I got this list from wikipedia, called the Hotchkiss' seven deadly sins of narcissism. I thought it was pretty fascinating. I don't try hard enough to go outside my own mind to create new PCs, which is why Sahreni and Laszlo are so similar, a fact I feel terrible for. Eventually I'd like to craft a new PC, away from psychopathy and sadism, away from the "suave and likeable" that I prefer to tend toward. Something outside my safety zone. These kind of traits would be great for a Nuit character. A Nuit would be a classic narcissist, thinking only of his own survival at the cost of others. Tarot writes that they drift away from their humanity. It's natural they'd lose the ability for compassion and self moderation. And on Sahova, this would be practically unnoticed. These people are pure pragmatists. Shamelessness: Shame is the feeling that lurks beneath all unhealthy narcissism, and the inability to process shame in healthy ways. Magical thinking: Narcissists see themselves as perfect, using distortion and illusion known as magical thinking. They also use projection to dump shame onto others. Arrogance: A narcissist who is feeling deflated may reinflate by diminishing, debasing, or degrading somebody else. Envy: A narcissist may secure a sense of superiority in the face of another person's ability by using contempt to minimize the other person. Entitlement: Narcissists hold unreasonable expectations of particularly favorable treatment and automatic compliance because they consider themselves special. Failure to comply is considered an attack on their superiority, and the perpetrator is considered an "awkward" or "difficult" person. Defiance of their will is a narcissistic injury that can trigger narcissistic rage. Exploitation: Can take many forms but always involves the exploitation of others without regard for their feelings or interests. Often the other is in a subservient position where resistance would be difficult or even impossible. Sometimes the subservience is not so much real as assumed. Bad boundaries: Narcissists do not recognize that they have boundaries and that others are separate and are not extensions of themselves. Others either exist to meet their needs or may as well not exist at all. Those who provide narcissistic supply (narcissistic supply being people who admire and affirm them) to the narcissist are treated as if they are part of the narcissist and are expected to live up to those expectations. In the mind of a narcissist there is no boundary between self and other. Most people exhibit a few narcissistic qualities. It's a natural part of the ego. Pathological narcissism is another realm entirely. David Thomas, who wrote a book on narcissism called "Behind the Mask" wrote that narcissists would exhibit most or even all of the following traits. An obvious self-focus in interpersonal exchanges (Talking about oneself excessively [I already do this one]). Problems in sustaining satisfying relationships (Driving people away.) A lack of psychological self-awareness (see insight in psychology and psychiatry, egosyntonic) Difficulty with empathy Problems distinguishing the self from others (Didn't see this one coming!) Hypersensitivity to any insults or imagined insults (see criticism and narcissists, narcissistic rage and narcissistic injury) Vulnerability to shame rather than guilt (This one is interesting. It's like disappointing yourself, vs. disappointing others.) Haughty body language Flattery towards people who admire and affirm them (narcissistic supply) Detesting those who do not admire them (narcissistic abuse) Using other people without considering the cost of doing so Pretending to be more important than they really are Bragging (subtly but persistently) and exaggerating their achievements Claiming to be an "expert" at many things Inability to view the world from the perspective of other people Denial of remorse and gratitude (Never admitting fault or showing appreciation.) Some of these are just so outside my usual realm of reactions that it's difficult for me to even imagine what it would feel like to be plagued by these feelings. I tout myself as a good roleplayer, and laud "chameleon" actors such as Johnny Depp who can play wildlly different roles, but sometime in the past few years, I've lost touch with what makes a "real" roleplayer--playing someone who is not yourself. It's one of the hardest things to do!

[Tabarnac]

This is narcissistic personality disorder? I'm not sure if Ifran suffers from that or if he's just Eypharian nobility. Maybe it's a mental health epidemic in Ahnatep! But thanks for the nod! This is interesting stuff.

[Laszlo]

I have recently decided to allow myself scrapbooks again. I am in a really good place since I've come back, so I think I can be mature now. Still not going to post much in mine. xD

But to reiterate, I still absolutely stand by everything I said in my long opinionated rant. Just not the SB thing. I do want people to know I care!

[Laszlo]

Hey guys!

I owe a few of you posts. Just apologizing for my slowness here. I had a difficult, stessful, and long work week, and I'm still recovering from it. My muse is fragile.

I'll be posting soon!

[Laszlo]

I love discovering new music. Today I heard two new songs for the first time, by bands that in the past I've considered unimpressive. The Black Keys have never really stood out to me. I was really into Train back when Drops of Jupiter came out, but that was like ten years ago? Where the hell does time go? Anyway I want to share these songs. I think they're groovy. Train - 50 Ways to Say Goodbye I always love a bit of Latin flavor in songs, but my favorite part about this song (aside from the hilarious and emotive lyrics) is that some of the melody seems to be inspired by the Phantom of the Opera. Am I the only one who hears it? Right before the chorus, I can hear the same melody attributed to this verse: In sleep he sang to me, In dreams he came. That voice which calls to me, And speaks my name. And do I dream again? For now I find The Phantom of the Opera is there Inside my mind. The Black Keys - Little Black Submarines This song also seems to be inspired by another melody. In some measures, you can hear bits that are reminiscent of the bass you hear in the intro of Led Zeppelin's Stairway to Heaven. Maybe it's my associations with these classic melodies that makes me like both of these songs, but both of them are pretty consistently good throughout. I've never really given The Black Keys a chance. I really ought to. I also notice these are both breakup songs. I wonder if my subconscious is trying to tell me something. Look out, boyfriend! Ahahaha. *serious face*

[Vhast]

I bow to your song discovering abilities. Loved both of those songs and am listening to them once more. In fact, I might just look up the chords to 50 ways. Very reminiscent of my favorite decade. Oh memories...

[Laszlo]

How to Use a Semicolon Correctly Without Looking Like a Pretentious Jackass Ah, semicolon. It's not just for winky faces anymore. Semicolon is here to make you look smart. Use one in a sentence; you'll be pleased with the results! The downside is that the semicolon is such a rare punctuation mark that using one makes you look like you're trying to appear smart, like when you use unnecessary sesquipedalians (that means big words). The semicolon has a variety of functions. The Oatmeal has a great satire article all about its different uses. However, in the context of fiction writing (which is relevant here at Mizahar), it has one primary use; it is a substitute for a conjunction. Conjunction junction, what's your function~ (Of course, you can use a semicolon correctly in a lot of different ways in fiction writing, but I'm just going to talk about its most frequent use: replacing "and", "but", or "or".) You remember conjunctions from school. They are the paste, the loving bond, that combines two complete clauses (a statement with a subject and predicate) into one compound sentence. There are three basic conjunctions, as mentioned above: "and", "but", and "or". Sometimes when writing a compound sentence, none of those words exactly conveys the right meaning, and cutting it into two sentences changes the flow more than you want it to. Here's a real example from a post of my own. Laszlo sadly realized there was no point in picking up all of the pieces; it was destroyed. You can't really fit "and", "but", or "or" very cleanly in that compound sentence. So, the semicolon becomes the magical "fourth" conjunction option. When you use a semicolon in a sentence, the best way to decide whether you've used it correctly is ask, "are there two complete sentences on both sides of the semicolon?" Note: This is ONLY when using a semicolon as a conjunction (its most common use in fiction writing). In a compound sentence, a semicolon is used to separate a two complete clauses; remember that a complete clause never starts with a preposition, like "when", "although", "which", etc. When one of the clauses begins with a preposition, you can just use a comma to separate them. DISCLAIMER: Grammar rules change. Grammar ultimately DOES NOT MATTER, and one of my favorite writers on the site has her own unique style of formatting her paragraphs that I have grown so fond of that sometimes I've considered it using myself (but then I'd be a total copier). If your doing something wrong, NOBODY CARES. But, some people like to be recreationally anal and perfectionist on their own time. You can call it OCD or just being cursed with a fixation on acute details. For the people who like to be politically correct with their grammar, I hope this blurb has helped you! For those who care more about the message that's relayed and less about whether you've written your or you're, I hope that you aren't offended and that this has at least been entertaining. Oh, I forgot to address one last issue! Now that we know how to use semicolons correctly, how DO you use them without coming off as a jackass? You don't. You will always look pretentious if you use a lot of semicolons in your writing. I should know, I use them in nearly every IC post! Whether you care what people think of you, that part's up to you.

For the record, I decided to write up this little thing not because I saw people using semicolons incorrectly, but because I was going over the Peer Development articles. Someone had used a semicolon in a sentence, and another player gently corrected his use of punctuation. It made me glad that I'm not the only one who gets preoccupied with the little things for funsies. And yes, that incorrect "your" above was on purpose because I knew some people would catch it. That's right, I am evil.

[Phoenix]

I'm kinda sorta waiting for you to write up your hate scrap about me. I saw this and got really excited.... then really disappointed, really fast.

[Laszlo]

Why Pheonix Is Really Smelly and a Huge Pain Because she just totally is, I mean seriously omigod.

[Naama]

Hey, are you racist or something? I need a hate scrap too.

Racist.