A thought occurred to him, a dark, angry thought, slipping past his careful defenses. He didn't want to be here at all. He didn't want to be back on Mizahar. He wanted to be back in the Ukalas. Why was he here?
Satevis quickly stopped those thoughts before they could continue, the only outward sign of his turmoil being that his hand had clenched into a fist. He nodded once, setting his cup down. So he would transform every morning and every night until...well, until he died, he supposed. And then what? He assumed he would follow the same process, facing Dira again and then either getting sent on or sent to a god that claimed him. Would Leth take him back? If so, wouldn't it be better for him to have drowned?
No. The gods didn't care for cowards who took their own lives. He knew that. He would face this reality, he decided, with as much as he had, keeping the hope that he would prove himself worthy again.
He was so lost in his thoughts that he almost didn't notice the doctor speaking to Eridanus. "No," said the doctor. "I don't have any other questions. You should get some rest." The last part was directed at him, and Satevis nodded once, getting off the table. A nurse came into the consultation room, leading him to one of the empty rooms.
She turned to Eridanus once the door to the room was open. "Are you going to stay here?" she asked. It was rather late at night and visiting hours were over, but occasionally friends and family did like to help patients get settled in. It would depend on Eridanus at this point, whether he stayed or he left.
OOCIf you want to talk to Satevis more, we can continue, and if not we can wrap the topic up. It's up to you.
