Closed [T&T] Do You Know My Name?

Tazrae flees to the Outpost to see if Alric can remember her.

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[T&T] Do You Know My Name?

Postby Tazrae on March 11th, 2022, 11:57 pm

Leaning back in Alric’s chair, Taz observed but didn’t interfere. Her leg, the one thrown over the chair's arm, bobbed as she watched him, restless and wanting to move. The woman didn’t dare join him, help him, or even move to his side and hold his hand. If he lost consciousness, she’d wait to make sure he woke, but that would be it. She’d done enough, as it was, and anything she said to him from here on out was not important. He wouldn’t remember. Anything after this induction that he learned; he’d have to learn on his own. Any instruction or guidance she gave him would be moot the moment she walked out his door. If he walked into the bathroom to wash off the blood, he’d walk back in and demand to know who she was. Still, she waited, quietly… watchful like a ghost just making sure he wasn’t going to leave the mortal plane any time soon.

Tazrae felt spent, drained, and in many ways defeated. She should have been watching a victory, but there would be no sharing this with him, no learning together, no forging onward and practicing. Glancing around the apartment while Alric’s body absorbed and converted her Res, she wondered if this would be the very last time she saw the place. Had she a need to return after this? Tazrae couldn’t go through the process of making him believe her each and every visit. She just couldn’t. It was time to be honest with herself.

Alric showed every sign of surviving this. He’d taken to the Res very well and in fact his reaction was more drastic than hers had been, longer, more deeply affecting him. She saw the wisdom Duncan had shown in his actions inducting her in the water. It would have been easier on Alric if she could have managed such a thing as well. It wasn’t possible here, not unless she drew a bath and had done it there. But even then, the freedoms wouldn’t have been the same. A tub was confining whereas a pool was not. She also now understood the sensations and the savagery of it. It was no wonder she hadn’t come out of her induction as she had come into it; untouched. She could still taste how Alric tasted, both his mouth and his blood and the sensation made her lick her lips. His tastes was something she’d never forget.

Taz shifted, dropping both legs to the ground and leaned forward in her seat. Even in her feather light clothing, she was overly warm and drenched with sweat. She felt like she’d just ran miles through the jungle, in the heat and humidity, and even in the rain. She could only imagine how Alric felt. Taz already knew she needed to recharge, though these days that involved a whole lot different of a process than it had been when she was fully human. Now it would take sunshine, the green of the earth, and maybe the purity of the waters to make her feel remotely back to strength.

Alric would need food, a large quantity of it, and rest. She was glad he was here in the Outpost, where he could wander a few steps from his apartment door and find all he needed to fill his belly. This once, Taz would refrain from trying to feed him. She couldn’t go out for supplies and come back in successfully.

When he spoke, she jumped slightly from her inner thoughts. Watching him come back to himself, she studied him for signs of damage and mental instability. He’d already done most of what she expected, coughing and sputtering, and even flopping on the ground. She let him do it, let the Res work, and let him work through all the transition. It would be no comfort to hover over him as he struggled through it. Every Reimancer had to experience what he did. She remained watchful but didn’t interfere. Her presence wasn’t strictly necessary. Alric spoke and Taz snapped back to herself. Was that a joke? Was he still making jokes even now?

Taz took a deep calming breath, still holding her tongue, and listening to what he actually said.

“Geomancer.” She said quietly. “Your element is Earth. You are experiencing your first element in its full spectrum. It is represented by the north, and is a very substantive thing, which is why you feel the weight. You will perhaps eventually learn them all and wield them all. But your first defines who you are; protective, solid, unmovable.”

Taz explained, speaking softly, slowly, and making sure she was facing him when she did so. He was making enough noise for ten people while she was remaining absolutely still and watching him. “Yes, it worked.” She said, pushing down her annoyance at his never-ending badly placed humor. He’d been through a lot in the last two seasons. And this day certainly hadn’t been the easiest for him.

“Alric, I’d teach you about this… I’d show you what I know…” She started to say, then shook her head. “But you won’t remember any of it. You need to learn on your own.” She said, glancing around rising and walking to the little library and to the Encyclopedia of Arcanology that lay there. She plucked it up, carried it over to the coffee table and pushed the table towards the couch. Then she retrieved writing materials and set them within his reach while she opened the book to the pages on Reimancy.

“Take notes. I’ll sit here and guide you… form your Res… but you must learn it on your own. You must learn it so your memory will be of you teaching yourself… figuring it out. I can’t show you anything, because it will be gone the moment you fall asleep or even leave the room to relieve yourself. Tell me what I can get you … more wine? Water? You’ll be hungry… very hungry but you can’t leave for food… not yet. First you have to make Res and direct the Res into what you want it to be… a stone, a bit of sand, anything… just try.” She urged, wanting to make sure he was going to be okay.

“Copy what you need from the Encyclopedia’s Reimancy section. I need to take it back with me and I cannot stay. I never could. My home is in Syka and until I figure out why no one can remember me, I’m useless to you. This has to all be on you.” She said firmly. “I just came to keep my promise. This time… this date… this place.” She added, returning to his chair and folding her legs under her as she sat down in it.

She would wait until he figured things out for himself… until he took the notes he needed. Then it would be time for her to leave him. They had only as long as his strength lasted, his hunger could be held in check, or until his exhaustion got the better of him. Taz would wait.

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"A mark of an open mind is being more committed to your curiosity than your conviction.
The goal of learning is not to shield old views against new facts, but to revise old views with new facts.
Ideas are possibilities to explore, not certainties to defend."


Garden Beach Syka The Protea Inn

"Listen to the wind, it talks. Listen to the silence, it speaks. Listen to your heart, it knows."
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Tazrae
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[T&T] Do You Know My Name?

Postby Alric Lysane on March 13th, 2022, 1:52 pm

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“Geomancer…Earth…well it certainly felt like I was turned to stone…I’m just glad I can breathe freely again that was…horrible. I’m grateful for the gift, I might not remember you, but I remember reading that it was quite the…personal honour” he said, looking at her once the throbbing in his head had eases somewhat.

It was a sad tone, tired and worn, and not just from the effects of the initiation. He studied her face now more serene than before but no less beautiful, her scent still memorable and her taste enjoyable. And with all of those things came the certain knowledge he would not remember them, or her, once she had gone. He’d not remember how he got the cuts or his new magic, yet another part of his life simply…gone. Torn out and thrown up to drift away upon the winds of time. He did not know what he had done to have such good things in his life, only for them to be taken away, but he felt sure it must have been horrible to maintain the balance of things.

“I don’t feel particularly immovable, solid or protective though…I suppose only time will tell,” he sighed, pushing himself up and shifting so that his legs were off of the couch and his head was in his hands, massaging the temples and then raking them back through his hair with a sharp intake of breath, settling himself to listen to what she said and would not remember, but listen regardless.

As she spoke of having to learn himself, that he was alone in this he nodded sadly, not looking at her but instead looking into the middle distance – it was nothing new, though apparently it was now, but it felt like it always had to him. He was getting used to it, or rather had been used to it and now would have to get used to it once more. It was strange, to know that a few seasons ago his highest care was how much miza he had and food he could store. He felt like he was walking amongst the pieces of a ruined life, not because of what had happened but as not remembered, but because those carefree days were shattered either way. How could you put back together something that could never be fixed?

“Yes…of course, you are right. Time flies and no doubt you have things you need to do to figure out your…condition,” he said, pinching his brow and pulling his journal and the writing materials towards him before sitting down upon the couch once more, “but either way you realise I won’t remember why I have these cuts, that I am a Reimancer now…maybe not anything of however long we have been together” he said thoughtfully, tapping the end of the quill upon his chin before beginning to write.

“I need nothing but your company, for if I lose that then I lose time…and that is all that matters it seems”

He copied the text from her tome word for word, making no annotations or any other comments, Diagrams and other things he made crude depictions of but as he had with the Flux he would probably make his own at some point anyway so they were less important. For a time, all that could be heard in the silence between them was the sounds of breathing and the scratching if the quill, working its way across several pages of his journal – a half dozen at least by the end – until eventually he slipped it back into the inkwell, there to stand by itself, a silent testament to the work he had just completed. He blew upon the last page until it had dried, gentle breaths, before placing the journal aside for later inspection. He had signed, dated and put her name next to the pages too – proof of her presence given how fantastical it would be to believe without her there to convince him.

“There…done. But I should probably write a letter to myself too, to explain this day, otherwise it all seems kind of…pointless” he muttered, almost to himself, but looking up at her to see if she would stay.

He began the letter anyway, before he ran out of time, and it was much quicker than the notations – more a personal account he thought he would believe, his own phrases reflected back at an imaginary version of himself, ignorant of what he currently knew. When it was done, he left it upon the table folded and with the words ‘Read Me’ upon the bac, to catch his attention for when she was vanished – literally in all cases. It was in his direct view and would be one of the first things that he would see once their time together was done. He leaned back and looked at her for a few moments, wondering what she thought of it all and how she felt. She looked tired compared to before, almost defeated perhaps, though he couldn’t be sure. She had said that she couldn’t return, couldn’t convince him every time. He wondered if that was because it took too long, or whether she couldn’t face it – their meeting had already proven it was possible, so he suspected it might be the latter of the two options.

“I suppose now comes the trying to use this new thing” he asked, waiting for her nod before leaning forwards and holding his hands together, creating a similar vision and intention as to when he used Shielding – the willing into his hands.

He closed his eyes and sought out the ‘well’ within, that clear water and mountain forests, jagged peaks with a hint of white powder. It was different to how he remembered it, everything still there but the waters now a shining silver, glistening in the imaginary light of his mind’s eye. He was so surprised he almost lost the vision but managed to hold on, if barely, before taking a while to establish the calm connection once more, floating above it and then reaching out once he was ready, grabbing a small handful and mentally willing it into him…through him...and seeking the ending of the path in his palms. He wasn’t sure how long it took, he didn’t open his eyes but more felt out the slow progress of the Res. Bit by bit, inch by inch, getting towards its ending – until eventually he felt a soft, viscous liquid rippling in his cupped palms and opened his eyes to see a small dollop there – not as much as he had thought but a start.

“Well…feels a bit like Shielding but…heavier. It’s like I can feel its weight tenfold, it weighs down my hands and mind…difficult. Not like shaping clay. No, this does take energy, like a long day hewing stone with a pickaxe perhaps…though I’ve never done that. Let’s see...you said change it…like just think it a different way?”

The question was directed at her, but also it was him thinking it through, she nodded at him and offered her advice as she saw fit, but as she had already said, and repeated, it was his magic, down to him to figure out, and that everyone was different. He frowned at the little pool of silver, trying to get it to form into an orb, muttering to it and talking to it, as if trying to verbally convince it to do as he wished. It took forever but eventually it did form into an orb, imperfect as orbs go but close enough. He wondered what to try to turn it into – soil seemed messy and he had never seen sand. He found himself wishing he could turn it into a diamond, but he doubted that was possible at all, let alone on his first try. Instead, he found his memory flickering through what rocks he had seen in his life, settling upon a crystal clear one he had seen at market once, see though – quarts he had been told it was when he had asked the shopkeeper out of curiosity. It had had as blue tinge to it – almost like the sea. It seemed an apt thing to try with Taz there.

“Here goes nothing…come on you, you know what I want…come on…that’s it, no no, clear and with the colouring…” he spoke to the Res, watching as it shifted and changed colouring, trying to obey but perhaps he was not mentally strong enough with it yet that he had to keep going back, starting over, and then cajoling it along once more.

It eventually worked, though it was not the perfect image he had had in his mind, instead cloudy and opaque. It was a vibrant sea blue-green colour though and it was, in point of fact, definitely a stone and solid. He flicked it gently just to make sure, breathing a sigh of relief and letting go of his magic once he was satisfied. He placed it before her and gestured for her to take it.

“Seems only right that you should take the first attempt, a reminder of the student you started off, even if we never meet again. Or, if you don’t want it, you can leave it somewhere in Syka. It seems more fitting there than here. You are far from useless, despite what is happening to you. I think you’ve proven that already, all things considered,” he told her, his gaze taking her in as he spoke, “but…I understand. Sometimes things lost are too difficult to take back. I think you know that I know that well enough. I hope you figure out whatever this is that has been done to you” he said, sincere and without mirth now, his joking had been to cover his own bitterness at life and its tricks more than anything else.

“I suspect that I’d want you to return if you do…but should you not then so be it. It would seem like you’ve done much for me already, it would be wrong to expect more. Still, good luck Tazrae, on your journey”
~ Thanks to Gossamer/Shiress for post Boxcodes ~
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Alric Lysane
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[T&T] Do You Know My Name?

Postby Tazrae on March 15th, 2022, 3:43 am

Taz nodded at his words, sympathetic. Her own induction was a clear memory she wasn’t likely to forget and she knew how he felt about the element. Her fire had burned and burned, washing through her like she was an empty vessel and it was liquid heat. “I’m glad you are feeling better.” She said softly, rising to walk to the kitchen area and dampen two towels. One was for him, for the sweat and blood and well… inductions weren’t clean. She set the fluffy thing beside him within easy reach for when he was ready for it. The other was for her and she settled back into his chair and she slipped the cloth beneath her blouse to gently wipe the cuts he’d made on her flesh as she watched him come to terms with his new reality.

“You might not remember, Alric, but I will never forget. I’m glad I was the one that got to stoke the power to life you already had in you. That was wild and beautiful and nothing I could have ever imagined.” She said softly, unsure if she could even talk about it because of the depths of feeling it invoked in her. She didn’t speak for a long time, not because she was tired nor because she felt drained. She didn’t speak because there were no words to say that would match what she was feeling now. She felt protective of him, but there was nothing motherly about that sort of protectiveness.

“We are kin now, in blood and in Res. Your first Res came from me, which came from others up the line, until the very first. We are of The Zatani djedline which traces its roots back into time. I’ll find out more about it when I can, and if I do, I will share it with you.” She said, taking a sheet of paper for herself and helping herself to a quill. She dipped it in the inkwell and leaning over the coffee table, she wrote the word down and began sketching the symbol of the bloodline. “It is customary for those inducted to get a tattoo of their djedline. I got mine here in the Outpost.” And she wrote down the name of the tattoo artist before setting the paper with his other things and leaving the wet quill to lay there quietly. Then, shifting in her seat, she turned and lifted her blouse, to show him the symbol inked on the small of her back. “You’ve seen it before… probably many times. But I know you … well… “ She didn’t want to say it again… that he’d most likely forgotten.

“Maybe you don’t feel that way… not now. But you will. Let it grow in you, strengthen you, and accept it as part of you. I know you can see the fire in me. It hasn’t always been there.” She said, though in truth he’d never seen her dance with fire, swinging her lit poi, and singing while she did so. In a way she was glad she didn’t know him as a child. He’d not recognize the wallflower of then with who she was now. And she suspected she’d not recognize that angry orphaned eight-year-old with that strong brave overburdened man he was now.

“Stop looking like that. I hate it when you do that... when your face gets blank. It bodes well for no one and is worse than when you are cracking jokes to cover pain. You are thinking dark thought again, fatalistic things.” She said, rising and walking to him. She braced a hip on the arm of the couch and reached out to stroke his hair. “I’m sorry I refuse to treat you like a stranger, because you aren’t a stranger to me.” She said, playing with his locks that were getting long. She liked his hair long. It was always clean and she bent to plant a kiss on the top of his head. “I have things that need doing yes… but I’m right where I need to be at the moment.” She added, irritated again that he was making assumptions for her. But truthfully, she wasn’t irritated at him… just at the situation she didn’t understand. And she knew she was putting more of a burden on him by even being here.

With him it was always a push pull… he kept her at arm’s length and yet at the same time showed her all the best parts of him so all she wanted to do was make a life with him. And he had no idea he was doing it. “You might not remember, but your djed will know mine. It always has. Even the first time we realized how important magic was together. And now, I don’t need Auristics to know that when I’m near you our energy tends to throw out tendrils to each of us, wrapping around the other like a lifeline. Call me fanciful, or a silly girl, but we are very good for each other.” She said firmly, her tone too tired to challenge him to doubt her.

“So much more than time matters. Happiness matters, Alric. Yours especially. And hope. I have it in abundance. I’ll figure out what’s going on with me. But, tonight, is about you.” She said gently, concern filling her blue eyes. Then she sat there to watch him as he wrote himself notes, copying both from the Encyclopedia of Arcanology and something of a letter to himself. In time she wandered back to his chair, though in truth she wanted to curl up beside him like she had so many evenings. Then, as he wrote, she got another urge and grabbed paper for herself and wrote something to him as well. She blew on it until the ink dried and neatly folded it then slid it below the READ ME note he left himself.

What Taz wrote out was a song for him… it was something she’d sing to him if she hadn’t feared it would distract him from his writings. She hadn’t written it herself, but she’d loved it the first time she heard it and had immediately thought of him. She made musical notations and wrote the lyrics above the sheet music, adding in time change notations, careful with the sharps and flats and even the tricky parts for the instrumental. She wrote the music down as if for a mandolin rather than any other instrument, because the song was sweeter with a more heartfelt instrument. It was a song she knew by heart and sometimes sang when she was alone and thinking of him.

The Song :
Alric –
I feel like whomever wrote this song, wrote it in your voice. When I sing it to myself, I hear it in your voice and not my own. I can’t be here right now to remind you. But I want to be, and as soon as I can again, I will be… right there to remind you that you are strong, and enough, and that you belong. I wish you would believe. You need to believe. I do.
-Taz

You Say
I keep fighting voices in my mind that say I'm not enough
Every single lie that tells me I will never measure up
Am I more than just the sum of every high and every low
Remind me once again just who I am because I need to know
Ooh-oh
You say I am loved when I can't feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
And you say I am held when I am falling short
And when I don't belong, oh You say I am Yours
And I believe (I)
Oh, I believe (I)
What You say of me (I)
I believe
The only thing that matters now is everything You think of me
In You I find my worth, in You I find my identity
Ooh-oh
You say I am loved when I can't feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
And you say I am held when I am falling short
When I don't belong, oh You say I am Yours
And I believe (I)
Oh, I believe (I)
What You say of me (I)
Oh, I believe
Taking all I have, and now I'm laying it at Your feet
You have every failure, God, You have every victory
Ooh-oh
You say I am loved when I can't feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
You say I am held when I am falling short
When I don't belong, oh You say I am Yours
And I believe (I)
Oh, I believe (I)
What You say of me (I)
I believe
Oh, I believe (I)
Yes, I believe (I)
What You say of me (I)
I believe



A grin crossed her face. “I wondered how long you were going to stall before you tried it.” She said mischievously, not liking the sadness that seemed to hang over them sometimes and making an effort to lighten it. She watched him, supervising but not interfering. She nodded when he needed it and made subtle noises of encouragement when he seemed to falter. His analogies were solid and he had a good feel for what he needed to do. It was just a bit disconcerting knowing that something in your hand, of your essence, would transform itself into whatever you willed it too within a certain parameter. “Not exactly thinking it a different way. It’s like walking Alric. You don’t will your legs to move. You just decide to head some direction for some reason or another and your body carries you as you will. Its like that… easy. Don’t overcomplicate it.” She said, knowing once he did it, he’d completely understand it.

She nodded her approval when he was done, and dropped her jaw slightly when he laid the stone before her, making it a gift to her. She immediately picked it up and tucked it to her as a piece of him she could take home with her. Tazrae had never had that before, and unable to speak, she simply nodded her thanks as close to tears as she’d ever been with him before.

There was a finality to his words and how he spoke them next. She blinked, understanding it for what it was; a dismissal. She should have stood up and said that it wasn’t the fact that he’d forget her every time she needed to leave. Tazrae had the patience to make him believe her every single time all day long every day if that’s what it took to stay to him. That wasn’t the issue. The issue was his inability to see past his confrontation with Florentin Arcadius. Tazrae planned to live a long and happy life, at all costs, and to the Ukalas with anyone that got in her way. He deserved one as well, but he was so stubborn – so set in his fatal assessment – that he couldn’t see the happiness beneath his nose begging to be…

She gritted her teeth and gripped the stone in her palm tighter. One lesson she’d learned early on in life was that she couldn’t make another person think a certain way or feel the way she wanted them to feel. If they didn’t… they didn’t. He was writing his own story and following the path he was laying out for himself. Who was she to dare him to do something different or be more? She could induct him to Reimancy, lay the tools to power at his feet and give him all the information she could to level a playing field for him. But ultimately, there had to be a reason behind why someone did something. Her why was set in stone… she wanted a future. She wanted freedom. She wanted no one else to suffer as Florentin Arcadius had made others suffer. Alric… Tazrae had no idea what he wanted. He wanted not to be some snatched body worn around like a sock to her grandfather’s smelly and evidently very old foot.

Opening her palm, she studied the stone there momentarily… lost in thought. Then she glanced up at him, nodding her thanks at his well wishes. “Maybe you should think of it another way…” She said softly, her eyes locking with his for a moment before she said her last words to him and turned away. “Maybe you should decide you want me to return and tell me so someday… regardless if you remember or not. Maybe you should decide you deserve the things that other people have and take for granted and reach out and see if I am of like mind if you ever do. We know some of the same people. Getting a message to me would not be hard. Bree. Oralie. There are others.” She said, tasting bile in her throat at the words “Good Luck”. He might as well have slapped her, even though he wasn’t even going to remember her.

“Luck has nothing to do with it, Alric. Make your own path and to the Ukalas with luck.” She said, then turned from him, leaving him there, and sliding her favorite books back into her backpack – the yoga and encyclopedia tome. She didn’t look back as she walked out. And she knew if she turned back once the front door closed behind her, that he’d most likely draw a weapon against her thinking her an intruder or a drunk harlot.

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"A mark of an open mind is being more committed to your curiosity than your conviction.
The goal of learning is not to shield old views against new facts, but to revise old views with new facts.
Ideas are possibilities to explore, not certainties to defend."


Garden Beach Syka The Protea Inn

"Listen to the wind, it talks. Listen to the silence, it speaks. Listen to your heart, it knows."
User avatar
Tazrae
Be savage, not average.
 
Posts: 1335
Words: 1916653
Joined roleplay: May 3rd, 2020, 2:02 pm
Location: Syka
Race: Human
Character sheet
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Medals: 5
Mizahar Grader (1) Overlored (1)
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Syka Seasonal Challenge (1)

[T&T] Do You Know My Name?

Postby Alric Lysane on March 26th, 2022, 4:56 pm

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Your Grades


Alric Lysane

Skills

Auristics – 1
Drawing – 1
Endurance – 1
Interrogation – 2
Logic – 3
Observation – 4
Persuasion – 1
Reading – 2
Reimancy – 1
Seduction – 1
Shielding – 1
Socialization – 4
Writing – 1


Lores

Alric: An Apparently Memorable Chest
Memories: Hidden Deep Beneath
Reimancy: Earth
Reimancy: Extruding Res
Reimancy: Geomancers
Reimancy: Initiation Ritual & Mechanics
Reimancy: Initiation Sensations
Res: Conversion Into Stone
Res: Mine Is Silvery In Colour
Tazrae: Cursed To Be Forgotten
Tazrae: Energies Intertwined
Tazrae: Forgotten Close Friendship
Tazrae: Shared Initiation Marks
Logic: Basics Of Detecting A Lie


Items Gained

2 x Steel Daggers & Sheaths



Tazrae

Skills

Cleaning – 1
Endurance – 2
Investigation – 1
Leadership – 5
Logic – 5
Persuasion – 5
Psychology – 3
Reading – 2
Reimancy – 3
Rhetoric – 5
Seduction – 1
Songcrafting – 1
Storytelling – 3
Teaching – 2
Weaponsmithing – 1
Writing – 3


Lores

Alric: A Promise Fulfilled
Alric: Addicted To His Scents
Alric: Behaviour & Mannerisms
Alric: Energies Intertwined
Alric: Graphic Knowledge Of Chest
Alric: Psychological Understanding
Alric: Shared Initiation Marks
Alric: Taste Of Flesh & Blood
Arcadius: To Be Ready For A Face To Face
Tazrae: Cursed To Be Forgotten
Tazrae: Strength To Be Forged
Tazrae: Weaknesses To Be Purged
The Outpost: T&T Apartments
Reimancy: A Weapon That May Make The Difference
Reimancy: Geomancers
Reimancy: Inducting Another
Reimancy: Induction Ritual Mechanics
Song: You Say
Twilight: Alric’s Mussurana
Weaponsmithing: Sharpening A Blade


Items Gained

Letterbox – 50gm value
Alric’s Stone Gift
~ Thanks to Gossamer/Shiress for post Boxcodes ~
User avatar
Alric Lysane
Carry On My Wayward Son
 
Posts: 763
Words: 1010203
Joined roleplay: October 29th, 2021, 5:41 pm
Race: Human
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