(Nyxie's ... ) This is not a scrapbook.

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The player scrapbooks forum is literally a place for writers to warm-up, brainstorm, keep little scraps of notes, or just post things to encourage themselves and each other. Each player can feel free to create their own thread - one per account - and use them accordingly.

(Nyxie's ... ) This is not a scrapbook.

Postby Nyxie Nadira Draer on April 12th, 2014, 8:18 pm

I changed the title, YET AGAIN. :D Although I do love alliteration, I felt like the last one was a little too self-deprecating.

This one captures the essence of what I love about writing. In the words of Michael Foucault, a French philosopher:

“What we see never resides in what we say.”

Writers strive to poignantly portray images, objects, feelings, actions, etc; even if words can never be equivalent to whatever they describe. Reading about a long walk on the beach at sunset is not going to feel the same as actually walking on a beach at sunset. And yet, many of us love reading, because it’s the closest we could ever get to the reality that the words describe.

In case the reference was missed, the title of this scrapbook is a parody of the infamous text under René Magritte’s painting: “Ceci n’est pas une pipe” (This is not a pipe). In much the same way, if we are to believe that a scrapbook is a book of blank pages for sticking in memorabilia, then this thread is merely a representation of a scrapbook.

There will be those who will say that such a philosophical musing is pointless---but to me, it’s just… intriguing, I guess.

Meh. It’s just fun to think about. :)
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(Nyxie's ... ) This is not a scrapbook.

Postby Nyxie Nadira Draer on May 21st, 2014, 3:44 pm

The Typical Vent


So I wrote a little blurb the other day, to try and help myself get back into writing. Thing is, Mizahar was the haven that fit into my otherwise scheduled life. RL had been pretty hectic with studying for exams during April… and then when I was done, I had all this free time that I started using for doing other fun stuff: hanging out with friends, cooking food for the fam, shopping sprees, binging on TV series like GoT and Orange is the new Black, etc… But then I started to miss Miz. I kept checking back on the site to read the threads I subscribed to, and to watch for any PMs I might’ve gotten. I started to write replies on a word doc---which then bugged out on me because I hadn’t saved it. The asterisks bug. Fucking hell.

This wasn’t the first time it happened, either. And I still failed to save the damn thing. I can’t get an update for the program either, because of some weird technical reason. So then I wasn’t really active for a while, because I was pissed off at losing my work, and ‘cause I found myself behind the infamous block. You know the one. So I sat down… and I did what I usually do when I’m frustrated. I vented:

"I haven’t been able to write. In a real fucking long time now. It sucks. It’s just hard, you know? I had all these plans, and now I feel like I’m stuck in a rut. Gosh, I used to think it was so easy. It should be easy. But I’ve been stressing out; I don’t exactly know why. I shouldn’t be afraid of what people are going to think; but that was never it. I just avoided it, I don’t know. Gibberish has always been the cure, hasn’t it. Just one post will get you back into the groove of things. You need to get back in there. The heck what other people say; it’s good for you. You’ve always needed a creative outlet. And you’re pretty decent at this. I expect you to write a book one day. I NEED you to write a book one day. It’ll be worth it, I promise. Gibberish that other people don’t have to read if they don’t want to. Gibberish that will basically be therapy for you. GOD I missed this. Why hadn’t I done this earlier? OMG it just feels so good to be able to type so fast and just get words on a page, so matter how stupid these words sound. I don’t care. I love this. I really love this. You HAVE to get back out there now. There are people out there who like your writing; or they wouldn’t be writing with you. There are real people out there waiting for replies from you, and you need to deliver. I know; it’s fucked up that your computer did that. But you know what? You can write it BETTER now. MUCH better. And who the fuck cares if you write stupidly? No one’s going to say shit, because this is the world that YOU are creating for yourself, okay? Alright, open that document, and let’s see what you can do, kid. I’m counting on greatness from you. Stay strong."

Every time I do this kind of thing, I always end up addressing myself from an outside p.o.v. Sort of like a pep talk for myself. That last part about writing stupidly and creating a world for myself was really only to help push me out of my box of comfort---of course, Miz is a RP site with rules that I respect and intend to follow wholeheartedly. Anyways, I’m glad I did what I did, because I was finally able to open up and let my creative energy flow.

I think I should’ve put up a notice about my exams to let my RP partners know how things were going. But I was sort of in denial about my slowed activity, since I was logging in to read threads pretty occasionally. In any case, I’ve realized three things: 1) Save my shit every goddamn minute. 2) Place a heads up in case of RL issues, even if you know you’ll be back soon. 3) I really enjoy being a part of this world, and I appreciate each and every one of you who helped me along the way, and played a part in Nyxie’s story.

Thanks~ :D
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Nyxie Nadira Draer
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(Nyxie's ... ) This is not a scrapbook.

Postby Radiant on May 21st, 2014, 5:09 pm

I recommend using notepad++, light, very functional, has virtually no crash and bugs, and of course, FREEEEEEE~

It has work tremendously for me on my slow laptop. Word lags in mine, imagine that. Just type notepad++ in google then the first result. ;)
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Postby Nyxie Nadira Draer on May 21st, 2014, 5:25 pm

Thanks Radii ^^ Unfortunately, notepad++ seems to be a Microsoft Windows application, and my laptop is a Macbook, so it's not supported on OS X. :(

I'll see if I can find a similar application, tho---in order to avoid any future crashes~ :D
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(Nyxie's ... ) This is not a scrapbook.

Postby Gossamer on May 21st, 2014, 6:08 pm



I'll be honest. Over the years I've found this sort of thing the rudest most selfish thing ever. It takes five minutes to tell people you are busy, you lost your inspiration, or you just can't write right now. Folks understand. I'll wait a year for someone who gives a five minute heads up. I don't for people that just blow it off then return and whine.


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(Nyxie's ... ) This is not a scrapbook.

Postby Nyxie Nadira Draer on May 21st, 2014, 11:29 pm

Ouch :(

You're right. I'm self-aware enough to know that it was rude and selfish of me, and I'm truly sorry. I apologize to everyone that I ignored for the last month or so, before coming back. Like I said in the last post, I've already realized that I need to be considerate, and give people a heads up in case of RL issues.

Whining? Yes, I whined. I complained about my exams and my laptop, and I'm taking responsibility for my actions. The post was a vent: I used my scrapbook as a means to give free expression to my strong emotions. I'm still a kid, in many respects, even if being 18 and finished my first year of university should say otherwise. But that's not an excuse to be selfish and rude (and angsty), and I know that. I'm in that transitional phase of growing up, learning how to deal with real-life responsibilities----learning how to deal with real-life in general---

Real life is important to me, as it should be for most people, I'm sure. I'm still learning how to juggle my social interactions in real life with my virtual interactions with people that are harder to connect with and care for through a screen of text. I want to connect & care, and I'm still learning how to do it.

In fact, that's what I've always had a strong & genuine interest in: connecting and caring for other people----Psychology----Psychotherapy. :) I even came back from volunteering with a psychologist just this afternoon. It was my second day, and I didn't expect much more than being asked to do whatever she needed (photocopying, organizing folders, etc.). In return, she agreed to give me the opportunity to sometimes sit in with her and the client when they fill out assessments. So today, I photocopied some documents, and then got to listen to her and a client fill in some forms. But the client became particularly stressed, and happened to express moderate suicidal thoughts. The doctor had to call for the paramedics to come and take him to the hospital for an intervention. :(

So. It's been a rough day... but I learned quite a bit. Thanks to anyone who happened to read through this - it means a lot :) And again, I'm sorry to those who I've been rude to. I promise to be more considerate from now on~



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Nyxie Nadira Draer
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(Nyxie's ... ) This is not a scrapbook.

Postby Kaie on May 22nd, 2014, 12:30 am

Welcome back! I know a lot of people are either strongly for or against it, but I'd recommend Google Documents as another option. I use it for absolutely everything. You can access it anywhere (as long as you have internet), it's been unfailingly reliable, and it saves automatically as you type. It's saved my rear end countless times. All you need to do is sign in with a Google account and you'll have access to all their applications from documents, presentations, mail, and etc. In fact you can share your projects with other Google accounts and edit them together in real time. If you haven't heard of it already, maybe give it a go. :D
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(Nyxie's ... ) This is not a scrapbook.

Postby Nyxie Nadira Draer on May 22nd, 2014, 2:32 pm

Oh yea, Google Drive! :D Why hadn't I thought of that before? I've used it for school projects in the past, but I never tried using it as my go-to - Thanks Kaie~! ^_^

I'll give it a test run for the next couple weeks, and hopefully, I'll make it my new best friend~ :thumbsup:

EDIT: OMGG, I didn't know I could download Google Drive as an application! :o This is awesome! Thank you sooo much~! ^.^
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Nyxie Nadira Draer
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(Nyxie's ... ) This is not a scrapbook.

Postby Nyxie Nadira Draer on May 23rd, 2014, 2:04 am

Rockin' Grandpa

So my grandpa and I took a bus to the doctor’s office today. He had an appointment, and he asked me to tag along. He’s usually perfectly fine with going by himself, but I couldn’t say no to him when he jokingly asked me what was more important to me: my computer or his self-declared awesome company. :D

I brought my phone along for the ride (to read Miz threads~), and had songs on it. At one point, he asked me what I was listening to, so I showed him this:



He loved it. Which is surprising for a guy who only listens to prayer music in an entirely different language. Not to mention he’s half deaf. But he actually enjoyed it!

Oh, and I also told him that it was a British band who played the song. So then he went on to tell me about how he thought it’d be nice if I went to Britain for my doctorate. Thanks, grandpa.
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Nyxie Nadira Draer
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(Nyxie's ... ) This is not a scrapbook.

Postby Nyxie Nadira Draer on October 1st, 2014, 9:08 pm

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New beginnings.

I felt like I needed to get out one last post before I send Nyxie off into retirement. I owe all of my threading partners an apology for disappearing without notice yet again… I don’t have excuses and/or justifications for anyone. It was wrong and selfish of me to vanish with zero forenamed reasons, and it’s a bad habit that I plan on breaking by taking things slow, and learning how to say no. Real life comes first, of course, but that doesn’t mean ignoring the existence of others who cared.

I initially intended on never coming back, but the allure of Mizahar is just so grand. I plan on RPing again, but I’ll be back as a new character. Nyxie was fun, but I can’t do it anymore. To put it quite simply- I’ve changed, and she hasn’t. Writing as Nyxie would frustrate me immensely, in a way that wouldn’t make the writing process an enjoyable challenge.

Thanks to all my threading partners and to anyone reading this, for being so kind, helpful and inspiring. I hope to return with a fresh start and I'll strive to give back to the community in gratitude for the support & time that a lot of you have given me.

Keep on writing, and don’t stop finding reasons to smile :)

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Nyxie Nadira Draer
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Posts: 232
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