Drunken endeavors [Airil]

[Markus Andres]

Markus stood up when she said those last words. He could hear it in her tone that he had stayed for too long. Perhaps his choice of words had also been terrible. But he couldn't change the past. He opened his mouth to thank her for her 'hospitality' when he noticed her sudden pain. Markus was quick in action, over by Airil's side, gently holding her right arm by the elbow. Something had caused her pain. He looked down at her gloved hands, wondering for the first time, why she were wearing those inside. "What's wrong?" Markus asked with compassion and worry thickening his voice. "Are you injured?" He asked, he had seen a similar expression during sparring. He had probably had that expression on his own face during sparing when someone had hit him particularly hard across the wrist or elbow. Every thought of leaving had vanished from his body, but he knew that if she told him to leave, he would. Even if she were injured, Markus had tried to help her and she had no wanted it then and when he had pushed to help ... Well. That was partially why he had been out drinking.

[Airil]

At his touch, she turned towards him submissively, cradling her wrist with her left hand. It was an automatic response that brought back many memories of 'accidental' injuries and her master's regrets. For a moment she was back in Ravok and the hand on her elbow was the hand of her master. She was gripped by a longing to see him, to return to familiar days, yet she was also afraid to look up and find him standing there as he had been in some of her dreams. She stood very still, not showing Markus the wrist, but not stopping him from looking either. "It's nothing, I just twisted it last night." She still wouldn't bring her eyes up to look at him. She tried to shake herself out of the instinct to submit to him. It had served her well with her master, but he wasn't her master. He didn't have the right to strike her if she resisted. But that thought wasn't enough to build up the courage to pull away from him. She had so much to hide and so much to lose.

[Markus Andres]

Markus listened when she explained that it had been twisted the night before, which of course made Markus believe it was him who had done it, he could easily have done something stupid while drunk. He gulped loudly. He tried to get eye contact with the girl, but her eyes seemed to avoid his. A normal reaction if you felt bad about something. Or so Markus believed. That was what he usually did himself when he had done something really bad, until he had grown some backbone and just looked people defiantly in the eyes. "Did you use this hand to sew with?" Markus asked, knowing too well that she probably had. "Airil, you should have told me. I mean, it must have hurt a lot to mend my shirt." Markus began to remove her glove. "Let me take a closer look, I have seen this kind of injury many times." Markus said in a calm voice. Not wanting to agitate the young girl.

[Airil]

That feeling was back as he removed the glove and her hand rested in his. She felt the urge to trust him again and this time, she did. "It's not that bad," she mumbled, halfheartedly trying to dismiss it. By the sound of her voice, she wasn't trying to divert his attention, she just didn't want him to worry. He would find that she had webbing between her fingers and scales sprinkled on the back of her hand that trailed over her wrist and out of sight beneath the cuff of her sleeve. Her wrist was swollen and agitated looking. "I just need to soak it." Her voice was soft and she had finally looked up at him, watching him examine the injury.

[Markus Andres]

Markus looked at her wrist, it looked painful, to say the least. Why hadn't she told him? Another part of her wish to hide what hurts her, or so he supposed. His eyes spotted the webbing between her fingers and he couldn't help but poke it gently, to see if it was living tissue or just hanging skin. The he noticed her scales too and gently brushed his index finger over those too. When he had satisfied his curiosity after a couple of seconds, he let his finger gently brush over the swollen area. Trying to feel if any bones or anything obvious was pointing out. Markus was far from a medical inclined man, he only knew that an open wound should be cleaned with water and that rest was often the best cure for many things. Let the body handle it itself. If it couldn't, find a healer who could cure it. "You should really keep your wrist at rest. Maybe go see a healer if it still hurts in a couple of days." Markus finished as he looked at Airil, who was looking at him. One of the few times he had made eye contact with the Konti. Looking into her greyish blue eyes. He smiled, blushed and looked down at her wrist again. "This skin, between your hands. Do you have it on both hands? And is it for swimming?" He asked, knowing that Konti had gills. Gills meant she were a fish - fish swam in the ocean. Unbeatable logic.

[Airil]

He seemed to find her Konti features to be a bit of a distraction, taking a moment to poke at her webbing and scales before finally turning his attention to the actual injury. She tensed slightly from the pain when he ran his hand over it. She held up her left hand and carefully placed her right palm against the back of her left hand. She spread her fingers on both hands and drew the glove back just enough for him to see that there was indeed webbing on bother hands, being vary careful to keep the back of her left hand covered. That answered his first question but she was afraid that answering the second might bring unwanted questions. Her gaze returned to him as she considered how to answer, she sighed. "I suppose so, but... Markus... do you wish to be friends?" She'd pause long enough for his response before continuing. "Would you," she cut the question off, unsure of how to phrase her question. "What if there are things I can't tell you? Would your answer remain the same?"

[Markus Andres]

Markus looked at her left hand and saw the same skin or webbing between those digits too. He gently touched the fingers, wanting to feel if that too was skin. Curiosity was a wonderful thing. So, it wasn't just some creepy defect hand or injury. He wondered if she ever wanted to go swim in the sea. He could probably take her down there one day. Would be a fun trip. Then she asked him something he found a bit strange. If he wanted them to be friends. He supposed friends were not something you asked for, friends were what you made after meeting and talking to people. "Uhh, sure, I thought we were friends." Markus said after a couple of seconds consideration. But it was not the end then and there, Airil had more. Obviously related to their fight the other day. Even if there were things she could not tell him. What were those things? But he shrugged after a little while, thinking that it didn't matter much. Nothing to get upset over. Again. "I'd rather have that you trusted me, but I can live with that." Markus said with a small smile. Trying not to dip into the anger he felt at not being trusted. He gave both her hands a small squeeze. He kneeled down before her and gathered the cookies in the basket again and picked the basket itself up when he was done and placed it on the table.

[Airil]

It bothered him. He made it sound like it didn't, but she could still see a hint of it. Was he really going to be able to deal with it? Wasn't it better to tell him upfront and let him make the decision? She hoped he didn't feel obligated to say it was all right. She moved to sit on the edge of the bed while he picked up the cookies, cradling her wrist in her lap. Her gaze rested on her hands. "It's not about trust. There are some things... that are just too painful." The words were hard for her to speak, they tried to catch in her throat. It was a lie, not a full lie, but still a lie, and it made her feel a ill. It was true that it would be painful for her to talk about her past, and it was sort of true that it wasn't about trust. Her trust for Markus was growing, but her trust for the knight-in-training was not. The question was, which was he first? Markus, or the knight? Airil looked up at him again. "Markus, if it's not all right. I understand." She couldn't keep a trace of sadness from entering her voice. She had tried pushing him away, and that hadn't really worked. Somehow she got the feeling that if she hadn't found him the night before, he would have found her later on. It was better if he decided to walk away himself.

[Markus Andres]

Once Markus had placed the basket on the table, he made sure not to turn and look at Airil. He would be better off looking away from her. He was also certain that she would be better off not having him stare at her when she spoke. She spoke about trust, saying it wasn't that, rather, that it was too painful to talk about. Markus could relate to that. He could relate to that all too clearly. He didn't walk over to the Konti though, instead, he walked over to her window and opened it to look outside. He wanted to say something, but he needed some time to gather his thoughts of what to do. It did ease his anger that she told it was not trust. In fact it almost made it dissipate completely. She said she would understand if it wasn't alright. That was the problem with it all, he felt it was alright now that she had said it was because it had been too painful. Markus eyes followed some people walking down on the street below. "After my mother died..." Markus started softly. "... I felt it was too painful to talk about what I felt... How I felt inside." He continued, giving it a brief pause. It was still painful to talk about. "... I lashed out at my family, I became violent to anything and everything. Until one day, my father had had enough and had me sent here." Markus sighed lowly. Just remembering those days made him wonder what would have happened had his father not sent him here. - Those weren't pleasant thoughts, at all. He turned to face Airil. "So, I understand if it is too painful to talk about. Just remember, if you ever do want to talk about it, I am here for you." Markus said giving her a small smile. Trying to cover up the big gaping hole he had just left in the wall he had built around his feelings.

[Airil]

Airil watched him place the basket on the table and move to the window but when he began to speak, her gaze returned to her hands as she listened. It was strange to think that at the same time she'd lost her mother at the same time he'd lost his, the events forever changing their lives. He had gone through a period of darkness, but he'd been saved before it got too bad. Eventually, he'd be able to put it behind him. She rubbed at her left hand. She'd never be able to do the same. If she'd never gone with that man when her mother had died, if she'd listened to that someone who'd tried to stop her and stayed in Syliras, would she and Markus have been able to become friends? Or perhaps there was something about fate that no matter what had happened, one of them would have come out into the light while the other would always be left in shadow. Something dripped from her chin. At some point, she'd begun to cry. Her head leaned forward, and her hair fell around her face as she tried to surreptitiously wipe the tears from her cheeks. The effort was in vain. The tears only continued to flow. She should say something, but she didn't trust herself to speak. The truth was that she had never really had the opportunity to mourn for her mother, or for herself. Now, here was someone who managed to drudge up her memories, someone who knew exactly how painful it was to lose a parent, who had also been deeply effected by it but whose end had been very different from hers. She found that she envied him.