Completed Old Ways of Thinking

Philosophy and Meditation Skill Grind.

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A lawless town of anarchists, built on the ruins of an ancient mining city. [Lore]

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Old Ways of Thinking

Postby Kynier on February 3rd, 2019, 1:19 am

8th of Winter, 518 A.V.



Once the shelves opened to reveal the secret passage, Doler was already stepping through into the abandoned shop. The man was looking rather composed compared to his usual appearance. Doler’s face was clean shaven, his hair wasn’t disheveled, and the clothes were not the same as what he had been wearing yesterday. It also appeared as though the man had gotten some sleep, for the dark circles under his eyes had decreased in intensity. It wouldn’t be fair to say that Doler possessed poor hygiene, more that he was likely to get so involved with something that his attention to those minor social graces would slips. Especially since the man did not socialize with anyone.

The wizard paused once he stepped out from his secret residence and tugged on the collar of his coat with a hand. His eyes focused intently on Kynier instead of launching into the typical cryptic debriefing of a task to perform. Kynier shifted his weight once nervously. While he had rarely seen Doler use magic, he certainly didn’t underestimate the man’s capabilities. A few times, he had thought his death would come at the hands of Doler’s paranoia. And the longer the silence lasted the more he felt at risk. “You’re troubled,” was what the wizard said to break the silence. “Your aura is tainted with weariness. If it isn’t remedied soon, you’ll be of no further use to me.”

Doler’s tone wasn’t harsh, but factual. And it was true. Today especially was a hard day. The waters had been rough which caused him to not sleep well. Which had made him think of the home that he had left and those that remained behind. Often, he didn’t have an appetite and did almost anything to keep his mind busy. Existing was painful when he kept remembering what it was like to live. “Wait here,” the wizard said before disappearing into his living area. Kynier leaned to the side to watch what the man was doing. Doler walked over to the bookshelves that actually had books. For nearly a chime, he examined the spines, looking for a specific one it seemed. When he found it, he pulled it from the shelf and returned to the main room of the shop.

“This should help, so long as you make a genuine effort to understand its contents.” Doler set the book down on the shelves beside the secret passage. “It’s an older way of thinking. One that has been lost to most mages. Take a few days to examine and exercise the lessons. If it does not appear to improve your mindset, then come back and I’ll find something else that you can experiment with.” Before Kynier could give a response, the wizard pulled the secret passage shut to leave the mage alone. Kynier sighed and strode over to the shelf to examine the book. It wasn’t written with calligraphy but handwritten by a feminine hand. The lettering was curvy, swooping, yet eligible. Kynier quickly read a few sentences and furrowed his brow in thought.

It was a meditation guide… for Reimancers. The author had sections with detailed meditation instructions and then in-depth explanations of its purpose and symbolism. He flipped through a few of the pages to see she had divided it up into sections based off the elements. The first section was an introduction to the… philosophy. Kynier looked around the empty room. The Sunset Tide was now going to be in use for the Ferry services, eliminating his one place of privacy. After a moment’s thought, he supposed he could attempt to meditate here at the Majestic. Kynier had never seen anyone come around and Doler wasn’t likely to come back out. So, he took a position by the wall and sat down to read more of the journal.




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Last edited by Kynier on February 3rd, 2019, 1:24 am, edited 1 time in total.
Kynier
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Old Ways of Thinking

Postby Kynier on February 3rd, 2019, 1:21 am




The writing was old. It wasn’t so much the vernacular that indicated the age but the coloration of the paper. Yellow stained pages that were devoid of damage from fluids or fire. Kynier gently turned them over until he got to the first mantra that the author had written out. First, he read through it completely before he allowed himself to think on the imagery and similes. It sounded intriguing. Then he reread the passage and thought about how long it might take for him to memorize it. The paragraph before the first mantra spoke of repetitions and that with each one a practitioner should feel a stronger connection to the concepts. Afterward thinking about that for a moment, he set the book down on his lap with the page to the first recitation open.

Wrists rested on his knees as his hands relaxed. Kynier took a deep breath then began to say the words aloud as he read them.

I am Djed, Djed is everything,
That which bestows life to the realms,
I am its Emissary, It’s guardian, It’s Will,
I am the Protector to the defenseless,
I am the Chaperon of the lost,
I am the Vanquisher of the wicked,
Enforcer of Peace,
I am connected to the source of life,
Life is everything,
Death of another is my death,
Preservation of another is my preservation,
I am the Sorcerer, The instrument,
I am Djed.


The first vocalization was slow to complete and there were a few ticks delay before he turned his eyes back to the top to begin the first repetition. Kynier struggled with the cadence and finding a comfortable flow of the words. Trying to establish one that synchronized with his breathing in a comfortable manner. Often, he had to take the breath in the middle of a word rather than at the end of a line. And while he did not speak loudly, nor project his voice to reverberate throughout the empty shop, Kynier’s mouth gradually felt dry.

After the fourth recital, he stopped and stretched his back out. It wasn’t as relaxing as it had felt to do empty-mind meditation. Perhaps that was just hunching over his lap to read the book. Kynier shifted around to face the shelf against the wall. Carefully, he propped the book up on the shelf at a level that allowed him to look straight forward, mostly, and read the words. He licked his lips, swallowed, and took a deep breath before beginning again.

This time, he spoke slower, more naturally. “I am Djed. Djed is everything…” Do so felt less taxing on his respiration and allowed him to be more at ease. Even the intent of his reading was more relaxed as the words became more familiar with each repetition. Other thoughts were naturally extinguished from his mind as Kynier’s focus turned solely on speaking the mantra. The more he spoke the softer his words became until they were but a faint whisper that he could barely hear.



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Kynier
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Old Ways of Thinking

Postby Kynier on February 3rd, 2019, 1:22 am



Kynier recited the mantra once. Then twice. Four more times. Eventually, he lost track of how many times he had recited the words. The mental effort to count higher at each milestone was drowned out by the thoughts and even the feelings that were beginning to stir within the mage. No magnificent revelation had been made, but it felt more like the beginning of a conversation one knew to be an informative one. Each time he said, “I am Djed,” it reverberated more in his mind. He was Djed. It formed his soul and gave him life.

Always, he had acted as though magic, Djed, was a part of him rather than a meager tool to be used to accomplish certain objectives. Yet, he was now realizing that it was more than that. He was Djed. Take that away from him, from anyone, and there would be nothing left behind. A husk that was once full of thoughts and dreams. Kynier was Djed, and Djed is everything. Kynier’s eyes no longer focused on the book before him as the words spoke more to him. Each mental sentence made firmer like a declaration of his identity.

“I am its Emissary. It’s Guardian, It’s Will,” he said a little louder. As a mage, he was magic incarnate. Every action he made represented more than himself regardless of how secret he kept his abilities. Suddenly, he stopped chanting the mantra and his thoughts went deeper into himself. A guardian and it’s will? Magic was the comprised of the source energies of life. How was he to be a guardian to it? It gave him strength. It gave him resolve. Because of it he was better able to protect himself. Was it not his guardian and not the other way around? How could someone harm magic? A thought on the less literal came to mind. Magic could be lost and forgotten. If mages, wizards… and sorcerers… ceased to be then magic would be lost. Life would continue, but it would be completely different. A guardian… of knowledge. And… reputation?

Kynier’s mind went to why Sunberth hated magic. One covenant had harmed magic so badly that fifty years later it was still wounded from it. Emissary. Kynier thought on the word for at least a hundred breaths. If he was an emissary, he was to be an embodiment of what magic could be. For so much of his youth, and for the failure of his first potential apprentice, the focus was on the dangers of magic. The ramifications its use would have on the caster. But there were a few times when what he saw was only the pure majesty of magic. Beauty and danger. A mage… no… a sorcerer was the embodiment of both. Mages used. Wizards studied. Sorcerers… embody.

“I am Djed. Djed is everything. That which bestows life to the realms. I am its Emissary, it’s Guardian, It’s Will.” The will of Magic. A concept as difficult to comprehend as the concept of infinity. What was the Will of everything?




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Kynier
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Old Ways of Thinking

Postby Kynier on February 3rd, 2019, 1:23 am




Syna traversed the sky and left spaces for Akajia’s children across the floor of the Majestic. Shadows surrounded the Nightstalker as he sat in silence for a long long time. Kynier was deep in reflection and contemplating intense thoughts that the journal had evoked. The Will of everything? A vague question that could only receive vague answers. Intellectually, he wanted to reword the question, but doing so would change the nuances of its significance. To ask, “what is the Will of Life?” would not be the same thing. Djed created life, but it also created everything. Trees, grass, water, air, and many things that were not truly alive by a mortal’s definition of the word.

“The Will of everything…”

Survival was the first thing that came to mind. Everything wished to prolong its existence to its maximum capability. Was it possible to apply that logic to something that wasn’t alive? For an instant, Kynier came out of his trance at the sound of scratching. A Brat was skulking across the floor and relieving itself. The ammonia smell permeated in the room and Kynier turned up his nose in disgust. Would the building’s will be to cleanse itself of the smell and the filth that the rodent had just left within it? It was inanimate and built to serve a purpose. How could it have a will if the author’s word choice was so literal?

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath of the foul smell, trying to ignore the stimulation and refocus on the meditation. “I am the Protector of the defenseless. I am the Chaperon of the lost. I am the Vanquisher of the wicked. Enforcer of Peace.” Kynier repeated the words mentally with an emphasis on protector, chaperon, vanquisher, and enforcer. The selection of each one was interesting. Why not defender of the defenseless? Protector was not the same as defender. Defense indicated a confrontation, whereas protector was… guarding.

Kynier smirked and scoffed at the realization. As a guardian of Djed, he was preserving multiple things? Knowledge of disciplines as well as the lives of those that can’t protect themselves? With Reimancy, he had a rare power. Was he then obligated to use it even for the betterment of complete strangers? Kynier’s mind only kept forming question after question and never an answer to even scratch the surface of the concept. He sighed heavily and wiped the thoughts from his mind. “I am Djed,” he repeated softly to realign his focus.

He was to be these things if he was to follow this way of practice. Emissary, guardian, protector, chaperon, vanquisher, and enforcer. What was he already? Try as he might, Kynier could not justify that any of those adjectives applied to him. Besides himself, he had no one to protect anymore. Or at least, no one he cared for that needed his protection. There was no special knowledge that he bore that required his guardianship more than anyone else’s. Or so it felt. There were only a few wicked individuals that he knew of in Sunberth. The “good” doctor and Stiletto. Would vanquishing them serve a higher purpose?

Enforcer of peace. Kynier was far from that. An arsonist and a killer. His efforts had added more fuel to the chaos of the city than to bring civility and peace. Kynier was none of them, but he wanted to be.




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Old Ways of Thinking

Postby Kynier on February 3rd, 2019, 1:24 am




Once more, he repeated the mantra to himself aloud. His thoughts now coming to dwell upon the words closer to the end. “Death of another is my death, Preservation of another is my preservation.” It sounded so direct in meaning among several thought-provoking lines. Kynier knew that killing of others was not a direct link to his actual death. Many had died at his hands. Whether the instrument was at the end of a blade or in the burning fury of his magefire. Some of those that he had killed haunted his thoughts more than others. Aidren was a fine example. A mage being hunted that he sought to save, only to have to kill with his own hands. Others were less distressing. People whose names he never learned that attack him. Men like Tanner, so sought to kill people desperate to make some mizas for food and shelter. The author was not being literal, but metaphorical. Killing someone placed a burden on the soul. One that killed a part of the soul by numbing it.

Preservation. What was the effect that helping others had on him? In a place like Sunberth, it was easy to identify how killing others affected one’s disposition. But there were so many fewer instances of helping another person. The few times Kynier had tried there had been no real success to speak of. Afterall, he had come here to help. To make changes and somehow help people that he would never encounter. Instead, he had gotten swallowed by situations that he couldn’t handle. Was the situation he was in due to his interactions with other people as much as the decisions he had made?

“Death of another is my death. Preservation of another is my preservation.” It seemed to allude to events in life coming back around on a person. Being cruel and filling another person’s life with hardship would one day fill his life with cruelty and hardship. But that the opposite had to also be possible. But what could he do to improve other’s lives? He had no trade skill, no significant wealth to use for philanthropic purposes, and his greatest abilities were hated by those he’d want to help. Despair crept into his mind slowly as he followed that trail of thought.

“I am Djed…” he repeated the mantra again to calm his mind. He could change his approach. It wouldn’t be easy but change never was. Kynier shifted and straightened his spine. This time, he said the words louder as though making a declaration. “I am its Emissary, it’s Guardian, it’s Will. I am the Protector of the defenseless. I am the Chaperon of the lost. I am the Vanquisher of the wicked. Enforcer of Peace. I am connected to the source of life. Life is everything. Death of another is my death. Preservation of another is my preservation. I am the Sorcerer, the instrument. I am Djed.”

Kynier took a breath, not having realized that he was nearly shouting the words to nothing and no one, but himself. He stood up and took the journal from the shelf. He flipped back to the first page where one would expect to see the name of the author. But there was none. Only a single word. Kyomah.



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Old Ways of Thinking

Postby Kelski on February 14th, 2019, 11:03 pm

G R A D E S
Kynier-

Psychology +2, Research +2, Logic +3, Meditation +4, Arcanology +1, Philosophy +4

Doler: Worries About Kynier & His Usefulness, Doler: Loaned/Gifted A Book To Kynier To Study (Meditation Guide For Reimancers), Logic: Deducing The Sex Of An Author From The Handwriting, Meditation: The I Am Djed Mantra, Arcanology: Djed Is In Everything – He Is Made Of Djed, Physiology: Mages Used, Wizards Studied, Sorcerers Embodied, Philosophy: Asking Unanswerable Questions, Self Knowledge: Knowing What One Was Contrasting What One Wanted To Be, Philosophy: Drawing Conclusions About The Nature of Djed, Psychology: Understanding Oneself & One’s Role In the World, Kynomah: Author of Meditation Book for Reimancers


Let me know if you have questions/issues or would like changes.




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Kelski
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